117. Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty
Z ar
My parents were clever, hiding this luxury in plain sight. We’re led through brightly lit hallways. The walls are paneled in the same dark wood that encased the dining room. The golden carpets beneath our feet are plush and comfortable.
When my males are shown to their rooms, they all shake their heads.
“Thanks,” Shadow says, “but as hospitable as the King and Queen are, we’ll be guarding our captain and his mate. Dax, Stryker, you take the first shift.”
Moments later, Anya and I are shown to our rooms. Most of my life was spent in gladiator barracks, sometimes on a cot filled with fetid straw, sometimes a simple wooden plank. The last three annums I’ve considered myself lucky to share my comfortable cabin with Anya. It’s nothing special, but it’s safe, I’m surrounded by friends, and my Anya and I get to share a bed.
This suite of rooms is certainly the most opulent I’ve ever seen. The walls are covered with golden fabric. The bed is high off the floor and wide enough for four. This is how I would have grown up? If this had been normal for me, I wonder if I would have taken this for granted. As it stands, part of me still feels I don’t belong here.
Anya pulls me to sit next to her on the bed, then cups my cheek in her palm.
“How are you doing, Love?” she asks, her eyes inspecting me as if they can glean the truth if she examines me closely enough.
I tug her onto my lap and rock her gently. I hope it tells her how much I love her, but right now, it’s more for my benefit than hers. I find it soothing.
“It’s a lot to take in. Sometimes anger spikes inside me at what was taken from me and the heartbreak it caused my parents. Mostly, though, I’m thankful to have found them. I’m the happiest male in the galaxy.”
She snuggles her head against my chest as I listen to what I just said, trying to discern if that was the truth or a lie.
I look over at Rynn sitting quietly in the seat next to me in our internal command center. A handful of days ago, I wanted to kill him. No. I didn’t want to kill him, I did kill him. Many times. Now, I’m used to his presence. I think I’d miss him if he were gone.
You handled that well, he says, not hiding the affection in his blue eyes.
Anya makes a contented sound from the back of her throat, then kisses my pec. Her hands circle my back as her fingers furrow through my fur. I know my mate, so I’m not surprised by what comes next.
“Make love with me,” she says as she pulls away enough to look up into my face.
I want nothing more than to take my mate here on this soft, wide bed. I came back from the dead days ago and haven’t done anything more than the one kiss the three of us shared. I spend most of my days with my cock hard as metal.
I take my mating duties seriously. Leaving my Anya wanting should be a crime. But Rynn is here. We’ve come to an understanding. I honestly think if I asked him to give me time alone with my beloved, he might agree. But she won’t.
I can go to the orchard , he offers. Tonight of all nights, you two should be able to share yourselves with each other.
It’s that—his selfless offer—that pushes me over the top into a decision I never thought I’d be capable of making.
We need to go forward as three, Rynn. His face registers shock, then gratitude, followed by eagerness which swiftly morphs into desire. He wants her as badly as I do. He’s been very patient with me. Appreciation for this male fills my being.
I lift her easily and have her straddle my lap, her knees at my hips, her core riding my hard cock. It’s all the answer she needs.
“It’s been a long time for you, Zar. And even longer for Rynn,” she says.
I circle her ankle with my tail as he grips her wrist.
“Let me suck you, make you come. Just an appetizer, so the main course will last longer.”
She’s wearing that sly, close-lipped smile that signals her arousal. She wants me—wants us. I’ll try to tolerate this.
You go first, Zar, Rynn says, the earnest look on his face searing in intensity.
The Zar of a week ago wouldn’t hesitate, but Anya’s right. We’re in this together until the end. The male has never had relations with a female.
You go first,” I tell him. I’ll watch and try not to rip the arms off this chair . Promise me one thing, I pierce him with my most serious stare . Don’t waste this by worrying about me. Promise you’ll allow yourself to experience the full measure of pleasure she offers. Don’t worry about her. She offers this out of love and wants to please us. We’ll please her a hundred times over by the end of the night. Let her give. You receive.
With that, I loosen my grip on her ankle, inviting Rynn to take over.
Rynn
I didn’t expect this. Didn’t expect Anya to ask for this, especially after the night we’ve shared. Most of all, though, I didn’t expect Zar to hand me the baton. Not for this, and not so generously. I considered refusing, but for once in my long life, I want to be selfish.
I grip her wrist harder, letting her know I’m here. She smiles at me, acknowledging my presence.
“I’ve imagined this a thousand times,” she says, her voice breathy. “All I want right now is to make you feel good. Can you allow yourself to receive pure pleasure?”
Her green eyes are shining with arousal in the dim light.
“I can make that sacrifice,” I joke.
“Zar?” she whispers. “Are you ready for this?”
Tell her yes.
“He says yes.”
“I want it all,” she says. “I want to feel Rynn’s affection for me. I want to hear it. I want…” She pauses and looks me—us—straight in the eyes. “I want to express my love for him, too. If you can’t handle that, Zar, I need to know.”
I focus my attention inward and look at the honorable male sitting next to me in the command center. He’s been through so much. Meeting his parents tonight, receiving so much affection and acceptance from them had to be a dream come true for him, but it was still deeply emotional. He doesn’t deserve to be hurt by what’s about to happen in this bed.
He’s still as a statue. Neither of us breathes inside our minds—we’re just thought-forms, non-corporeal. But he’s not moving at all as he gives this deep thought.
He begins nodding. Slowly at first, then faster.
I care about you both. If you… love each other, you should be able to express it. And I will tolerate it. Perhaps one day, it will even bring me happiness.
Have I told you how much I admire you? I ask.
Don’t suck up , he says with a wry smile.
“He’s handling it, Anya,” I tell her.
She smiles and cups my cheek.
“I hated you at first, Rynn.”
“I know.” I mirror her, placing my palm on her cheek. “I kept telling you it wasn’t my fault, that Zar gave me an invitation. Then when I realized it wasn’t with full knowledge and consent, I was riddled with guilt because I hurt you both so deeply. Should I apologize again?”
“You’re forgiven. I told you that before.”
My cock, so hard a moment ago, deflates as we talk. She leans into my hand as my thumb strokes her pointed chin.
“Then you grew on me.” She turns her head to press a kiss to my palm. “You were so earnest. You tried so hard. It was an honor watching you grow from a stuffy, duty-bound Arclite to a male with emotions. You let me see your fears and challenges. It wasn’t easy, but you let me in.”
“Aye,” I say, surprising myself at how much I sound like Zar.
She leans closer and brushes her lips against mine. “Somewhere between when you woke up in Zar’s body and now, Rynn, I fell in love with you.”
An electric current races through my body with her admission. Really? She loves me?
Leaning close, I slide my furred cheek against her silken one and whisper in her ear. “Love, Anya? Tell me again.”
Cupping the back of my neck under my mane, she places her lips against my ear and says, “I don’t know how it works, but I love you. I love you both.”
For the first time in my life, I’m loved in a corporeal form. I remember being loved when I was younger, when I was a being of light. But for three millennia, I’ve been alone. A serious, focused brain in various bodies. Now I have… a home. And a lover. Not just someone to share the pleasures of the flesh, but a person to share my soul with.
No! Two people to share souls with.
“I’m the luckiest person alive,” I breathe as I cover her cheek with little close-lipped kisses. I follow the line of her jaw, then the furrow of her throat. We’re being tender, her fingers threaded through my mane, her lips mimicking mine as she kisses my cheek and a spot below my ear that gives me shivers.
As sweet and heartfelt as this is, we’re on the cusp of something else. Passion. It’s building for both of us.
With the strength of one finger, she presses me back against the bed, then pulses her core against my kilt-covered cock. The force with which it springs to life surprises me. My eyes flare wide as my body responds to her with raw desire.
“Love can be expressed in many ways,” she says as she lifts an eyebrow. “Not all of them tender and sweet.”
Gripping her hips, I grind our pelvises together, crushing her against me as I thrust up toward her. A rush of excitement flies through every cell in my body.
After sitting on her knees between my legs, she slides her hands up my thighs from my knees, lifting my kilt to expose my cock. Zar wears no undergarments.
“Someone’s already hard for me,” she says as she drinks in the sight of me. My cock kicks from the heat of her attention.
She leans up, rearranges her voluminous emerald skirts and settles her open core on my cock. My eyes pop open wide in surprise at the slick, warm heat that greets me.
“Whoops,” she says coquettishly. “Should I have warned you I removed my panties the moment we were shown to this room?”
I can’t respond. I’m speechless. To have been male for millennia, but to have never been this close to a female before, to have never felt the hot slide of my cock against a female’s drenched lower lips? There should have been a law against it.
“Does that feel good?” she asks.
“Heaven.”
“It’s heaven for me, too, Rynn.”
When she says my name, my cock kicks against her. It’s the intimacy of her word. No, it’s the acknowledgement that she knows she’s riding me , that it’s my body under hers that makes this the best moment of my life.
“I love the sound of my name on your lips,” I admit.
“Rynn,” she breathes, saying it just to please me. “You’re here with me. And Zar is watching?” She waits until he brushes his tail across her ankle.
“It’s all still good?” she asks and must receive her reply because she leans down and kisses me.
These aren’t the soft, experimental kisses that express tender feelings. They’re determined, questing. She’s like a different female. She’s on a mission.
Her fingers curl around my shoulders as her lips press against mine. She only manages one or two of these hard kisses before her soft, pink tongue slides along the seam of my lips.
“Zar,” she whispers, “it’s mine and Rynn’s first time. Can you pretend it’s yours, too? Enjoy it like I’ve never tasted you before?”
A pang of hurt slices through me. For just one moment, can’t I have this beautiful female all to myself? But I realize she’s the smartest person in this room. She knows he’s the weakest link in our odd threesome and wants to ensure he’s onboard.
She waits for him to tighten his grip on her ankle before she continues.
After one more swipe of her tongue against my lips, she leans back to say, “I remember my first kiss with this mouth. I was terrified of those teeth. Bare them for me.”
I pause, forgetting that except for the tail, I’m in charge of the body, then I snarl.
“Oh yeah, big guy. Make a noise with that.”
I always thought sexual encounters would be serious, but she wants this to be fun? Yes, I’ll play.
I expose my teeth with a lusty roar—it surprises all three of us.
A To’narr male makes that particular sound only when he is making love with his truemate, Zar informs me from the command center. I swear I hear a smile in his voice.
“Yeah. White. Hard. Frightening. Sharp. Canines.” She punctuates each word while giving my bottom lip a sexy pluck with her teeth. “This gorgeous face doesn’t scare me anymore,” she says with a lick up the length of first one and then the other of my bottom fangs.
I must be embracing my animalistic side, because my mind flies to a picture of her doing the same thing to my cock—a long, hard lick up the shaft like it’s a child’s candy.
She wiggles her bottom against me, letting me know she felt my cock twitch in response to her little game.
“Rynn likes this?” she asks, as she licks my upper canines. “Or is it this?” she asks with a smile as she grinds against me. She was playing a moment ago, but with this, her eyes flare open with arousal.
“My Anya likes this, too,” I say, my voice a low purr.
“That’s right, my love,” she says, “play with me.”
I freeze as my eyes shutter in pleasure. She’s generous with those words. As they wash over me, I acknowledge I never allowed myself to even hope for anything half this intimate.
“That’s right, Rynn.” She moves her pelvis in a slow, sexy circle against my cock. “I love you.” Her playful tone is gone. She’s piercing me with her most serious stare.
In perhaps the most stupid move of my life, I slip inside to sit on the chair in the command center.
Zar. Are you okay?
Ask me in a couple hoaras , brother. Let’s see how this plays out. He’s not smiling, but his fingers aren’t about to peel the arms off the chair, either. It’s all the answer I need, so I return to my Anya.
“Zar’s okay?” she asks, one eyebrow raised. She’s a smart one. She knew exactly what I just did.
“He’s getting used to things.”
“We all are. How did it feel to hear those words from me, Rynn?”
Now that I’m not worried about Zar, I allow the reality of her love to wash over me.
“I’m not sure. Maybe I need to hear it again,” I tease.
She smiles, “I love you, Rynn.”
My heart stutters in my chest as the depth and breadth of the moment washes over me. In one swift movement, I flip her onto her back so I’m riding her.
“Anya,” my voice is a deep growl against her mouth. “I love you, too. Can I say it whenever I want? Will you get tired of it if I tell you more than ten times a day?”
I kiss her hard, then barge between her lips so I can taste her even as she shakes her head in answer to my question.
I lap my burred tongue against her soft one, then pull away only long enough to ask, “Twenty?”
She shakes her head again, then lifts her chin, sinking her head into the pillow-soft bed.
“I want you naked, Love. I want to know everything about your body. I wonder if you’ll respond like Zar or if there will be differences.” She grabs my ear and gently runs her finger along the edge until I shake my head with a laugh.
“It tickles.”
“See? That doesn’t tickle him. It makes him hornier.”
“It did that too,” I admit.
“We have the rest of our lives to discover each other’s desires,” she says. “I can’t wait another moment to suck your cock.”
As if in answer, my male appendage bobs in agreement.
She shimmies off the side of the bed and then pulls on my ankles, indicating she wants my legs dangling off the edge of the bed. She dips her knees, but before she puts her mouth on me, I say, “Let me see you, my love. Let me help you remove your dress.”
Perhaps it’s because I’ve shared a body with Zar this past week, but I’m bold and unafraid to ask for what I want. Or maybe it’s because I know this female likes me. No. She loves me. Could my world get any better than this?
“Watch me,” she says, a seductive smile on her beautiful face.
She stands between my feet, reaches to the back of her neck, and hits the autozip. The quiet sound accompanies the movement of the fabric as it gaps across her back.
“You’ve seen me before in Zar’s mind?”
I nod.
“Was it as good as this?” She shimmies, and the emerald fabric slides slowly down first one shoulder, then the other. It hangs for a moment, held up only by her breasts, then resumes its downward glide.
Some part of my mind is aware that the silken fabric hits the floor, but I’m fully focused on those beautiful pink buds, already puckered with arousal—for me.
“I want to learn you, Anya. I want to hold the weight of your breasts in my palms. I want to taste the tips and flick them with my tongue. I want to know every curve and hollow like a blind male and be able to bring you to the heights of pleasure. I want to know the meaning of every noise you make, so I know when to speed up and when to slow down.”
“And you will, my Rynn. But it’s your turn now.”
For the first time, I see the tuft of brown hair at the apex of her legs. A purr rumbles in my chest as a chuff bursts from my mouth. Before the night is over, I’ll have her taste on my lips.
She motions to my kilt. “Off.” Zar removed our sash the moment we passed through the door to our room.
I undo the leather belt and open the kilt so I’m fully exposed to her gaze. The way her eyes glaze over in appreciation makes me feel more alive—more male—than ever before in my life.
“Let me make you feel good,” she says. It’s half request, half command. She’s asking if I’m ready. How can she not know I’ve wanted this for lunars ? “Lie back.”
I use a pillow to elevate my head so I can keep my gaze on her. I don’t want to miss a minima of this.
She starts at my ankles, circling them with both hands as she moves up my calves and thighs, nipping and biting. She doesn’t travel in a straight line. It’s a teasing trail of semi-circles as she moves ever closer to my now-throbbing member.
I had just started experimenting with prolonging my pleasure when Zar arrived back on the scene. For a moment I worry I’ll release before she reaches my cock. Perhaps she understands this, because one of her hands grabs me by the root and squeezes —almost hard enough to hurt. It definitely gathers my attention. And it reduces my arousal so I can enjoy her provocative attention for longer.
“My mouth is watering for you,” she says as she nips my thigh, her eyes unwavering from mine.
I grunt in response, so aroused I’m unable to form intelligible words.
Her hand still gripping the base of my cock, she leans between my legs and her tongue lands on one of my balls. I hiss in shock. Or maybe it’s pleasure. Perhaps it’s both. People do this? I banish my initial thought, which is that it’s obscene.
Closing my eyes, I lean back and allow myself to experience the pure pleasure of her ministrations. This female who I love is expressing her feelings for me with her mouth. When I let myself dive into the bliss of being tended to like this, I again fear I’ll come too soon.
“Slower,” I urge as I grip her shoulders, wanting to pull her back up to kiss me.
She releases my cock and stops the magic she’s performing with her tongue, but shakes her head.
“I’m not stopping. Just a brief pause.”
She leans up to kiss my belly, which gives me no relief, since the tips of her breasts trailed upward along my fur. One of them slid up the underside of my cock.
“Temptress,” I accuse.
“Mmm.” She nips the skin over my pelvic bone. As she does so, her other nipple glides across my cock.
“Evil sorceress.”
“Mmm.”
Gripping me again, she hovers her mouth over the head of my cock and breathes humidly.
My hips lift and I moan, “Not fair,” even as I hope she never stops.
“What names do you have in store for me when I do this?” Her voice is playful, but her behavior is far from it when she licks me from the root to the tip with the flat of her tongue.
“Anya!” I cry out as the bottom half of my body levitates off the bed.
“I thought for sure you were going to call me a devil,” she says, then licks me again, painting me with her saliva.
“Enchantress?” she asks as she licks me again, this time on another trajectory.
“Beelzebub?” On this sensual journey, she uses the tip of her pretty pink tongue to flick against the notch in the head of my cock that is the most sensitive spot.
“Fuck!” I shout the Earther curse word as my fingers grip her hair to pull her away from me.
As I catch my breath and gain control of myself, I see her beautiful face, complete with smug expression.
“So proud of yourself, Anya?”
“Not yet.” She pouts. “Not until you spill down my throat.”
My eyes flare wide at her wanton words. No, that’s not it. It’s her blatant desire. This female, my female, wants me and is unashamed to say it.
She returns to breathe on the head of my cock, then allows her curls to drag along it. Every cell in my body is awake and aware and totally focused, wondering what her next move will be.
“I’m losing control,” I warn.
“Good.” She looks at me, her green eyes sparkling with desire. “Oh look. A present? For me?”
She’s eyeing the drop of liquid beaded on my slit.
“I hear this tastes awful.” She has the audacity to wink at me, reminding us both of my first experience with its taste. “Let’s see.”
I watch as she licks it slowly, never taking her gaze off me. Her tongue flattens, and she takes a long, broad swipe at my cockhead. When the taste bursts on her tongue, her eyes close in pleasure and she makes a low, appreciative hum in the back of her throat.
I get it now. It’s not the taste. It’s the way a female tells her male she fully accepts him. I’m overwhelmed with love and lust and a burning need to reciprocate. Later.
Settling back against the mattress, I shutter my eyes and allow myself to fully enjoy whatever this female does to me. This is love. Just a different way to express it.
She sucks the head of my cock into her mouth, then swipes her tongue around it. The pleasure is sublime. Even though I try, I can’t control my hips from pumping.
She’s sucking now, her head bobbing. My lids fly open to watch as her head full of brown curls bounces up and down on my cock. The transcendent pleasure ratchets up a notch when her palm grips my base. My whole shaft is encased in either her hand or her mouth as she speeds up her tempo.
No amount of self-control can stop my release when she starts humming. The orgasm barrels at me, building in my balls and gathering intensity until a burst of pleasure as deep and wide as the ocean releases in one moment of bliss.
I try to pull out of her. No one would want to swallow that, but she fights me. I take it as an expression of her love. It’s beautiful and makes me feel her affection to the marrow of my bones.
Panting from pleasure, my pulses slow, then stop. I return from the heights of my bliss as I watch her take one more lick, then use the tip of her tongue to catch a droplet at the side of her mouth.
Lifting under her arms, I pull her to lie with me.
“That was amazing,” I tell her, unable to put into words that the intimacy she afforded me was life-changing.
“Kiss me.” She makes it an order, not a request.
I kiss her hard on the mouth.
“Tongue.” Another order.
Ahh. When I dip inside her mouth, I understand. She wanted me to taste myself on her, to accept even this primitive aspect of myself.
“Get it?” She asks with a smile.
“It’s all different when it’s done with love,” I breathe against her lips, no longer wanting to reject any part of this body I share with Zar.
“How are you doing?” I ask Zar out loud so Anya can stay in the loop.
It’s my body, too. Anya’s spent three annums learning how to please it, he says with a genuine smile. Sharing wasn’t as hard as I thought.
“Are we ready for round two?” Anya asks as she burrows next to me and licks my nipple.
I’m both sated and energized and could go all night. But there’s no room for selfishness in this triad.
“I’ll catch my breath as I watch you and your mate,” I say with a smile as I retreat to our internal command center.
How are you doing, my friend? I ask.
I felt your pleasure—and hers. It’s not easy, brother. You’ll see in a moment.
I’ve never considered myself a jealous person, but the moment she sighs his name in pleasure, I have no doubt it will eviscerate me.