Chapter 14
FOURTEEN
SEVEN
I glare at Vortex’s text.
I’ll try. I have a few work things to catch up on.
“What did you send Vortex off to do?” I ask Caleb sourly. “He says he has work .”
Caleb is sitting on the living room armchair, Miss K in his lap, staring straight at me. I resist the urge to roll onto my side and face the back of the couch.
I don’t want to talk to Caleb. I don’t want to have this “conversation” that he’s been hinting at.
“This and that,” Caleb says vaguely, and I think he’s lying. He’s covering for Vortex, who’s also lying to me and apparently doesn’t want to see me right now.
I clutch my phone tighter. “I’ll ask Havoc,” I say. “Unless he’s off doing ‘this and that’ as well.”
Caleb shrugs. “Ask and see. But if he says no, we’ll have the conversation without him.”
“We don’t need to have a conversation about anything,” I inform him. But I pull out my phone and text Havoc.
Can you come over? Caleb is about to lecture me.
The text sounds as whiny as I feel, but I don’t particularly care.
The phone buzzes immediately.
Ugh. Be up in five.
Relief floods me, and I tell Caleb, “It can wait. Havoc’s coming.” And Havoc will stop Caleb from complaining about me missing one day of work.
“All right.” Caleb pets Miss K, and her purring gets louder. He leans down to kiss the top of her head, and she gets up to rub against his chin with a soft meow.
The noise attracts Nacho’s attention. He jumps down from his perch on the cat tree. I stretch out my arm to him, but instead of coming to me, Nacho hops onto the armchair and butts his head against Caleb’s hand.
Traitor.
I huff out a breath and get up. I don’t want to be near Caleb, so I cross the room and head toward my bedroom. “Let me know when Havoc gets here,” I tell him.
It’s not like Caleb hasn’t honed in on the fact that I’m a bundle of nerves, but that doesn’t mean I have to show him as much.
It isn’t until I hear Havoc’s voice — several long, excruciating minutes later— that I come back out, wary but more confident about how this is going to go.
Havoc, at least, will understand.
I walk over to him, hugging him tight. “Get me out of here,” I complain.
Havoc squeezes back and glares in Caleb’s direction. “What’s going on? Why are you terrorizing Seven?”
Caleb picks up Miss K and stands up, walking over to us. She’s still purring loudly. “I’m not terrorizing Seven. I want to discuss what happened the other day, when he missed work, had a panic attack, and needed Vortex to help him calm down.”
I don’t like the matter-of-fact tone he uses, and my arms tighten around Havoc as I wait for him to tell Caleb that it’s not something that needs to be discussed — that it was a mistake. “I already told you it won’t happen again,” I mutter.
Havoc leans away from me, though. “Wait, you missed work? Why?”
Before I can answer, Caleb holds his hand up.
“This discussion is happening, Seven. But you can choose which room we have it in.” He pauses, and more softly, he adds, “I will probably make you cry.”
Making me cry bodes well, at least. It means he’ll hurt me.
“Your room,” I say instantly. “Then you can be close to everything.”
We’ll talk about this bullshit , then he’ll take up a flogger or something until I cry.
Thirty strokes, enough to show that he forgives me.
Caleb shakes his head. “I’m going to make you cry with words, Seven. You’re going to be afraid, and angry.”
“Wait, what the fuck?” Havoc puts himself between me and Caleb. “Why are you being such a dick?”
I want to know the same thing. Linda had already laid into me, and I don’t think I deserve more of the same — least of all from Caleb, who says he cares about me.
Unless he’s only pretending.
Caleb lets out a heavy sigh. “Because if I’m not ‘a dick,’ Seven will suppress everything, and then he’ll do something stupid like try to choke himself on Vortex’s cock.”
My head snaps up, and I look around Havoc at Caleb as utter betrayal runs through me. “What did he tell you?” I demand, anger and embarrassment making my cheeks feel hot .
“I thought you liked seeing Seven choking,” Havoc adds, quieter. “Seven likes it rough.”
“I really don’t want to have this conversation standing around in the entryway. Which room, Seven?” Caleb repeats.
“Why does it even matter?” I retort. “And I’m not going to cry . I’m fine .” But I let out an exasperated sound. “The living room is fine.”
“All right.” Caleb bends down to scoop up Nacho, who has been rubbing against his leg. “I’ll put the cats in your bedroom for now, so they don’t bother us. You can go sit on the couch. Havoc, sit with him.”
My heart is racing. I press closer to Havoc like that’s going to protect me from this talk that Caleb is being so serious about.
“Like I was going to do anything else,” Havoc scoffs. He puts his arm around my shoulder again. “Okay. It’s probably better to get it over with, like a bandaid.”
I shake my head, but I let Havoc lead me toward the couch. He sits down, and I settle down in his lap, resting my head against his shoulder as I try to tell myself that everything is fine, that everything will be fine, even though I have a sinking suspicion that it might not be.
Havoc loops his arms around my waist and kisses my neck. “It’ll be fine. My mom used to lecture me when I was young, and mostly she wanted me to know that she disapproved.” He huffs against the nape of my neck. “I stopped listening to her when she started dating the Step Asshole though. You can probably ignore whatever Caleb says.”
I nod, but I don’t feel any better.
I wish Vortex was here, too — at least, I do until I think about what Caleb had said. What else had Vortex told him?
Caleb returns without the cats. He sits down on the armchair again, doing that infuriating thing where he watches calmly without saying anything .
I squirm on Havoc’s lap. “Well?” I demand. “Just say whatever you want to say.”
Havoc tightens his grasp reassuringly.
“All right.” Caleb leans forward. “I’ve heard from Linda that you missed work in favor of blackjack. You spent all morning at the tables. Was there a reason for this?”
I scowl at him. “I didn’t want to go to work.”
That’s not even entirely a lie, but I don’t want to tell them the truth.
I’d been so anxious about my family possibly sending someone to keep an eye on me that I hadn’t been able to stand the idea of being around Linda — who reminds me so much of her that I can barely handle it on a good day.
Caleb doesn’t need to know that, though.
Havoc’s arms loosen. “Seven… You can’t skip work.”
“Well, it doesn’t matter anyway now,” I snap at him. “She fired me.” Hurt and anxiety race through me as that conversation plays again in my mind. She’d been so angry. It had been dumb, and I’d made a mistake, but she’d been furious with me.
I’m not sure what was worse: her reaction or mine, though.
“She didn’t fire you,” Caleb says. “She talked to me and asked what was going on. She felt bad about making you have a panic attack… but that leads us to the other issue. What set it off, Seven?”
“She said she couldn’t use me ,” I say bitterly, ignoring Caleb’s question. “Because I’m not reliable, because I made one mistake. She hates me.”
“Linda’s pretty chill, though.” Havoc strokes my stomach gently. “If she’s willing to give you another chance…”
“She’s not ‘chill,’” I snap. “You weren’t there. You didn’t hear her.”
“Linda was understandably upset because you not only didn’t go to work, you didn’t contact anyone about the fact that you wouldn’t be there. It was disrespectful to her time, as well as to all the other people who were relying on you, Seven,” Caleb interrupts. “I have full sympathy for her situation, especially right now when she’s juggling several different shows and we’re gearing up for the end-of-year season.”
I glare at Caleb, but the fact is that I’m not used to people relying on me.
I’m not used to being important, and honestly, I don’t think I like it.
“It was a mistake ,” I emphasize. “I wasn’t going to make it a habit. I…” What justification will he actually listen to? That I forgot? That I didn’t feel like it?
Anything but the truth, that I’d felt scared and helpless and I hadn’t wanted to face her.
Caleb shakes his head. “It wasn’t a mistake. A mistake is adding up the numbers wrong, or misspelling a word. Not showing up to work and going to sit at the tables instead is a deliberate choice.”
I look at Havoc, desperate for him to stand up for me, but he looks torn.
Maybe he even looks disappointed.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” I say, swallowing around the lump in my throat.
“I’m going to insist,” Caleb says sternly. “We’ve got enough trouble looming around us. We can’t afford for you to disappear on us because of a mistake .”
I bite my bottom lip, desperate to escape, but when I try to stand up, Havoc’s hold on me tightens. “Hey, Seven, calm down.”
Calm down .
Like I can really calm down when they have me cornered like this.
Twenty-one steps , my mind supplies.
“Let me go,” I demand. “I’m not doing this.”
“And then, after your panic attack—” Caleb gets up and takes a few steps closer.
I look up at him and shake my head. “I didn’t panic! ”
“After your panic attack,” Caleb continues, “You used sex with Vortex to hurt yourself. That was wrong of you, Seven.”
I freeze, both fear and anger washing over me as Caleb talks about Vortex. “I… it…” I stammer. “I didn’t hurt myself. I just blew him. He was fine with it!”
But was he?
Doubt starts to creep in, and I realize I have no idea whether Vortex was actually fine with it. The idea that he might not have been, that I might have forced him in any way, has me utterly on edge, and I find myself clawing at my arms with my sharp nails before Havoc grabs my wrist and forces me to stop.
I whine, trying to pull away from him, but he doesn’t let go.
“Vortex wants to take care of you,” Havoc says quietly. “He wouldn’t want you hurting yourself like this.”
“I’m not—” I begin to say, only to stop myself. I clench my hands into fists, trying not to let the feeling of being trapped overwhelm me. “I’ll apologize,” I say desperately. “I didn’t mean to upset anyone or hurt anyone or do any of those things.”
What if I’m exactly like them?
Don’t cry. Don’t cry, don’t cry, don’t cry.
Caleb stops in front of me and lifts my chin up with a single finger. “This isn’t the worst news I’m bringing you, Seven. But tell me why you did it. What upset you so badly?”
“Who says I was upset?” I ask, trying to lift my hands up to wipe at my eyes, but Havoc’s fingers are firm around my wrists. “Maybe I just wanted to gamble.”
But the words sound weak even to my own ears.
“Get it over with,” Havoc says. “Like a bandaid.”
My vision blurs from the tears I’m so desperate not to let fall, and my shoulders sag. “They’re here. All the time, they’re here,” I choke out. “They’re watching me, they’re waiting for me, and they want me to know it.”
“Who’s here, Seven?” Caleb asks, and despite how gentle his voice is, I’m still desperate to get free of this .
“My family,” I whisper. “I saw… I saw someone, the night of the fight. And I don’t know who they’re sending that I don’t—” I nearly choke on my words. “That I don’t recognize. And Linda…” I trail off, unable to continue. I can’t say the words. I can’t .
“What did Linda do?” Havoc demands sharply. “If she hurt you?—”
I shake my head quickly, even though she’d scared me so badly.
Even though she’d made me panic.
“She’s like her, ” I whisper, feeling like I’m breaking as I turn my head so I don’t have to look at Caleb.
“Like who?” Havoc asks.
I squeeze my eyes shut and silently beg Caleb not to make me do this.
“She’s like Madam Abigail Lockwood, isn’t she?” Caleb answers.
That sound that escapes me makes me sound like a wounded animal, a quiet keening that makes me feel even worse because Madam Abigail Lockwood would be furious at me for ever sounding like this.
“Abigail Lockwood? Who’s she?” Havoc asks, confused. “I’m two steps behind here.”
“Who is she, Seven?” Caleb asks, gripping my chin and forcing me to look up at him. “Tell Havoc who Abigail Lockwood is.”
I shake my head, trying to remember how to breathe even as big, horrible sounds escape me over and over again, but Caleb isn’t going to let this go. Not until I say it. Not until Havoc knows.
I hate him for doing this to me.
I hate him for forcing me to tell Havoc.
I hate him for making me feel all this shame and panic and grief, and he was right: he was going to make me cry.
“My… My…” I can’t say it. I can’t . I sob, and this time when I try to bury my face in my hands, Caleb lets me. It’s only then that I can choke out, “She’s my mother.”
And god, she always hates it when I cry .
It doesn’t make me look attractive, it sounds pathetic, and my clients don’t want to hear it.
Even thirty lashes wouldn’t fix this.
My world is shattering, and the fact that Caleb knows the truth of who she is — of who I am to her — makes those ugly sounds keep coming out of me.
“Fuck,” Havoc hisses, tightening his embrace around me.
Caleb leans down and presses his lips against mine. “Good job, pet. I’m proud of you.”
I let out an ugly, horrible laugh. “I hate you. I hate you. I hate you,” I chant, over and over again, and she’d…
She’d do worse than lash me for that.
But I deserve it.
Caleb kisses one of my tears. “That was extremely hard. But that’s why we’re here.” He makes a strange sound. “I was going to suggest a bath, but your tears?—”
My misery.
He’s getting off on my misery, and I should hate him for that more than I hate him for making me say those words aloud, but I don’t.
Instead, wild hope flutters in my chest, and I look pleadingly at him as tears continue to run down my face. “Please,” I whisper.
But then I remember what he’d said, and the thought that maybe Vortex hadn’t wanted it, hadn’t wanted me , and my heart shatters all over again.
No one wants me.
No one but my family.
“I want to go home,” I say, my voice shaking so hard that it’s all I can do to get the words out.
“Fuck that,” Havoc says immediately. “Your own mother did… did… she did that shit to you? No. You’re staying.”
Caleb smiles gently. “On that, Havoc and I will agree. You’re ours, Seven. I’m not letting her take you from us.”
I shake my head. “I don’t want you. I don’t want any of you. I don’t. ”
But I do want them. I want them so badly. I want them to hold me and kiss me and…
And fuck me hard and fast and brutal, until I can’t even think anymore, because I don’t know how else to deal with this.
“You don’t want Havoc to carry you into my bedroom?” Caleb asks. “You don’t want me to crop your ass? You don’t want Havoc to choke you? You don’t want us to fuck you senseless?”
My breath catches, and I want to beg for those things and more, but they don’t really want it. They can’t look at me, with my face all blotchy and my eyes red and snot running down my face, and actually want me.
“We can also cuddle with you,” Havoc says. “If you’d rather do that. If we tell Vortex that you need hugs, he’ll come running, too.”
“I don’t want…” I hiccup. “Don’t want hugs.”
I don’t want to see Vortex. I don’t think I can face him.
I want what Caleb and Havoc offer, the violence and the pain.
“All right.” Caleb backs away. “Let’s go to my bedroom. I’ll give you the crop.”
“Thirty,” I plead. “Thirty.”
Thirty is enough.
I think.
Havoc lifts me up and carries me to Caleb’s bedroom. I cling to him even when he sets me down.
“Hey, we got you,” Havoc murmurs. “You’re fine. And you can always tell us to stop whenever, and if Caleb goes too far I’ll deck him, and?—”
I shake my head, trying to stop wheezing and crying, and croak, “Just hurt me.”
So I don’t have to do it to myself.
Havoc groans and squeezes my wrists to the point that I’m sure I’ll have bruises.
My breath catches, and I press myself closer to him, silently pleading for more .
“Don’t hold back,” I manage, blinking away tears as I try to meet his eyes. “Don’t hate… Don’t hate me. Don’t hate yourself. Hurt me.”
“I don’t hate you, Seven,” Havoc says fiercely. “Why would you think that? I?—”
Because Vortex probably does, I think, but I can’t say the words.
“I’m still here,” Caleb interrupts. “And I need access to Seven’s ass if I’m going to use the crop on him.”
I squirm, and Havoc lets go of me so I can shift on the bed, lying down with my head in his lap and my ass up in the air in anticipation for what Caleb’s promising.
These are tears I want to give him, tears that aren’t wrought of the pain inflicted by my own family.
Havoc pulls my jeans and underwear down to expose my bare ass.
“I’m not giving you thirty,” Caleb says. “Pick a better number.”
I whine. “That’s the only number.”
Anything less isn’t enough. Anything more is too much.
I need thirty .
“Thirty would destroy you, Seven.” Havoc strokes my ass. “I wouldn’t want thirty, and I get beat up regularly.”
I swallow hard, wiping at my eyes again — for all the good it does. “I deserve it,” I say. “Vortex isn’t gonna punish me. So please .”
“Pick a different number, Seven,” Caleb repeats, harsher this time. “Pick a number you want, not the one you think you need to say.”
He’s not going to give me what I need.
He’s going to deny this, and I don’t know what to say, what to do. “Twenty,” I finally mumble. That’s usually when I want to beg her to stop — even though I know better and I don’t. But it has to be enough for them, right?
“Twenty,” Caleb confirms. “Havoc, if you can hold his hand?”
“Duh,” Havoc answers. He bends down and kisses the top of my head. “You’re doing great, Seven.”
I’m not. Not really .
But it feels so good to hear him say it that even if I wanted to argue, I can’t.
Havoc grabs my hand, and I cling to it, bowing my head as I raise my ass in the air again in open invitation for Caleb to finally take the crop to it.
Caleb doesn’t say a word as he brings the crop down on my ass for the first strike. It’s a quick, painful sting, but I know Caleb held back.
“One,” I say automatically, and I add, “I’m sorry” like I’m supposed to.
“No.” Caleb presses the crop against my ass. “Don’t apologize. This isn’t a punishment. This is to make you feel good.”
I don’t understand.
How is it not a punishment? He’d pushed me so hard about missing work, and now… “What is the punishment?” I ask in a small voice, terrified of what he’s going to say. If he locks me away, I don’t think I can handle it. Not right now.
“There is none, Seven. We talked it out. You’re going to do better.” Caleb rubs the welt he’d left.
“Yeah, like… I do like rough sex when everybody’s enjoying it,” Havoc adds, squeezing my hand. “I’m not doing it because I hate you or want you to suffer. If you think that…”
I shake my head. “I don’t,” I say, but the confusion and the pain make it hard for me to sound anything but lost. Pathetic. “Please, I need more.”
I lower my head again, burying my face against Havoc’s thigh as I wait for the next strike.
When it comes, I still whisper the word “two,” but it’s lost against Havoc’s pants.
My throat tightens around the next words, the instinctual “ I’m sorry.”
“Good,” Caleb says. “I love the way your skin shows the impact so easily.”
I whimper, not knowing what to say in the wake of those words, those kind words .
I don’t deserve them.
I don’t deserve any of this.
But I’ll take it anyway.
Caleb gives me the next three strokes in quick succession, the pain layering too fast for me to add “I’m sorry” or “thank you,” then he speeds up so that I can’t even keep up with the count.
I gasp and writhe, and I let the pain wash over me. Havoc holds my hand and pets my hair while I lift my ass up for more of the pain.
The strokes stop.
“That was ten, Seven,” Caleb says. “Do you need more?”
I need thirty.
There’s a part of me that’s tempted to tell him to stop even though I can handle so many more because I want him to fuck me. I deserve this, though, and I nod. Realizing he might not be able to see the gesture, I rasp out, “Yes, Master.”
Caleb groans loudly. “Seven?—”
Havoc’s body shakes with silent laughter. “That really gets you off, huh?”
“Seven is lucky I have the self control not to spread his legs right this second,” Caleb answers.
I’m not sure if I’m lucky or not. I want both. I want him inside of me, and I want him hurting me, and I want to know that uttering that single word can bring him so much pleasure.
I squirm, my ass higher as I silently beg for more.
“All right.” Caleb brings the crop down again, and the small break means this strike feels fresher, sharper.
“Eleven,” Havoc says.
I glance up in confusion. “I should?—”
He pets my head. “I’ll handle counting, Seven. You can enjoy and turn your brain off.”
I bite my bottom lip, unsure of what to think about that. Then I slowly lower my head again, letting him take over the counting as I drop into that space that only they can make me go.
Each subsequent stroke is harder, heavier, and I inhale sharply as they land. The pain burrows its way beneath my skin, until it’s unignorable.
I deserve this, I remind myself.
I squeeze my eyes shut and brace myself for the next strike, the one that will bring me over the edge of pleasurable and straight into agony.
Stop crying, baby. We aren’t done yet.
The crop taps my ass softly.
“Do you want more, Seven?” Caleb asks.
No .
I can’t say that, can I? If I do… Won’t he be disappointed in me?
Won’t he hate me?
I stay silent, struggling to come up with the right words to say that won’t make him upset with me, hoping he’ll make the decision for me.
He doesn’t.
Enough time ticks by to where I realize he’s not going to, and I finally whisper, “I want… I want you to fuck me. I want Havoc to hurt me, to choke me. I want…” I wish Vortex was here, too, but I don’t deserve that. “I want to cry for you, Master,” I say instead. “Please.”
“Good job, pet,” Caleb says. He sets the crop down and trails his hand down my back. “How many did he take, Havoc?”
“Sixteen.” Havoc squeezes my hand. “You really got into it, Seven.”
I nod, feeling dizzy — confused, even, because it was so few strokes but I don’t feel like I need more, somehow. “I feel all floaty,” I tell him, the haze making it hard to continue, but I push on, “But I need you in me. Please ,” I say again.
“I had every intention of it,” Caleb says. He reaches for the lube, and I know I should spread my legs for him and give him easy access, but my limbs feel so heavy, in a good way. Caleb directs my legs to splay wider and begins fingering me. There’s no familiar cold shock of lube, even—he’d warmed it up in his hand first.
“I don’t think he can get on all fours,” Havoc says, but not in a mean way. He isn’t mad. If anything, he sounds awed by it.
I let out a sound that’s half-whimper, half-whine. No, I don’t think I could manage to stay up like they’d need me to, but I’m willing to try. I struggle halfway up, but Caleb firmly pushes me back down onto the bed until I’m sagging down against the covers again. I want them, both of them, but it feels next to impossible.
Caleb’s fingers penetrate deep, pushing insistently against my prostate, and I moan wantonly.
I’m glad they aren’t like the men who’d wanted me to stay quiet.
I’m glad they want me to feel good.
Tears prickle at the corners of my eyes again.
“Shh, you’re okay, Seven,” Havoc says, wiping away the tears. “Are you ready to take Caleb? Do you want to sit on his lap?”
I nod, and he helps me up with his strong, callused hands. They feel so good touching me while Caleb pulls my pants down the rest of the way with his free hand. I squirm to help him, though I feel so languid and drained that I can’t do much.
I remember the last time he’d fucked me like this, with me in his lap as I was too spent to move, but this time, it’s beyond being spent. I’m hard, but it feels like a distant concern.
All I want to do is make them happy.
Havoc has to hold me while Caleb pushes his trousers and briefs down. His erection is deep red and glistening with precum, and I can’t wait to be fully seated on him, to feel him stretch me wide with his heat.
“Vortex is gonna be mad he missed this,” Havoc says.
The reminder threatens to kill my mood, but Havoc tilts my head up to kiss me. “Fuck, you are so gorgeous, Seven.”
I kiss him back ardently, as greedily as I can manage as I push those thoughts away, and he groans and thrusts his tongue into my mouth. His hands go to my waist, and he grips my hips tight.
“Are you ready?” Havoc asks me.
“Y-yes,” I whisper. I’m beyond ready. I need to feel Caleb inside of me, and I need to have Havoc, too. My hands feel limp at my sides, but I kiss him again. “My mouth?” I rub my head against his chest.
“Yeah. I was going to wait, but I don’t think I can.” He kisses the top of my head. “You ready there, Caleb?”
“I was simply waiting for you,” Caleb answers. He wraps one arm around my waist and draws me toward himself. I feel the blunt head of his cock against my hole, and I’m so loose that he slides in easily.
A strangled sound escapes me, and I mewl as Havoc shifts away from me. I reach out to clutch at him, but all he’s doing is shedding his pants and boxer briefs to reveal his own hard cock.
“Fuck… Fuck my mouth?” I plead with him, my cheeks flushed and my face hot, but I want this. I want them both to use me, to remind me that they still want me no matter what sins I’ve committed.
And oh, there have been so many of those.
Havoc groans and nods fervently. “Yep. Just gotta…” He strokes himself a few times before he gets close enough to rub the tip against my lips. “There. Have fun, Seven,” he says.
My breathing catches, and I lean in more so I can run my tongue along the slit. It’s not what I want, though. I want him to take my mouth so hard that I gag, that I choke, that my tears well up for a different reason entirely as he takes me however he wants.
I clench my ass around Caleb, still feeling dizzy and distant but wanting to make this good for him, too.
Caleb moans, then pushes me forward, so that I take more of Havoc’s cock. Caleb’s hand lingers on my back, pressing down against the welts he’d left, those sixteen strokes that weren’t anywhere near thirty yet somehow still felt good and right and perfect.
It’s my turn to moan, though the sound is cut off as Havoc’s cock reaches the back of my throat and keeps going until I’m struggling to swallow around him instead of gagging. I don’t think he’d mind the latter; I think he’d take it as a challenge. But I don’t want to look even uglier than I do right now .
“Squeeze tighter for me, pet,” Caleb murmurs, licking the shell of my ear. “Can you do that?”
I’m not sure, but I try. It’s a weak attempt, and I do it again, clenching my ass as hard as I can around him as he fucks up into me. I want him to go harder, faster, but I can’t beg for it with my mouth stuffed full.
Caleb rolls his hips, jostling all of us, and Havoc grunts when I swallow around his cock. Havoc’s hand in my hair pulls, and I love that small hint of pain, the roughness that I associate with Havoc.
“You’re gonna make Havoc come first,” Caleb says, thrusting up again. “But don’t swallow. You’re going to keep his load in your mouth, and then Havoc’s going to kiss you.”
A full body shudder runs through me at the idea of trading Havoc’s cum back to him. No one’s ever asked for that before, and I’m not sure what’s hotter: the thought of doing it or the fact that Caleb’s ordering it.
Havoc laughs. “Fuck, that sounds gross. But sure. Think you can manage not to swallow, Seven?”
I moan in assent, letting Havoc feel the vibrations around his cock from my throat.
Havoc grips my hair tightly, then begins thrusting much faster than before. It’s all I can do to keep my mouth loose and open for him. My teeth scrape against the head of his cock, but he doesn’t stop to hit me or to yell; if anything, it only makes Havoc moan harder.
It’s an erratic rhythm, disrupted by Caleb’s thrusts, but I give myself over to it. I don’t have to worry about anything except my body making the two of them feel good. The pressure against the welts on my back, the tugs on my hair, only heighten my arousal.
Havoc suddenly stops and pulls back. I whine, trying to get him against the back of my throat again, but Havoc shakes his head.
“Mouth wide open, Seven,” Havoc gasps, reaching down to stroke himself a few times.
I open my mouth wide, wanting this, wanting him, and it’s only then that I realize I’m breathless from how brutally he’d been using my mouth.
It still could’ve been more.
I still want more, but this will have to be enough.
I wish I could reach up and stroke him so he doesn’t have to do it, but my limbs are still so incredibly heavy that it’s all I can do to keep my mouth open as cum starts to spill into it. I would greedily drink it down if I could, but that hadn’t been what Caleb wanted.
No, my master wants me to hold it in my mouth, on my tongue, and I do it without complaint.
“Hurry,” Caleb demands. “I want to see you kiss him before I come.”
It dawns on me that Caleb must be close too, and I didn’t even do that much for him.
Havoc huffs impatiently, but he cups my jaw and leans in to press his lips against mine. I open for him, moaning as his tongue plunges inside.
It’s strange, stranger than I’d expected, but Havoc doesn’t hesitate as he tongue-fucks my mouth despite the taste of his cum in it. We trade it back and forth as I let out needy moans, and Caleb starts to thrust up into me with more force. I squeeze my ass around his cock as hard as I can muster, and I’m rewarded with the sound of his groan and the feeling of heat flooding into me as he comes.
“His cock,” Caleb says. “Jerk him, Havoc. Make him come now .”
Havoc huffs against my lips, but he reaches down and wraps his large hand around my erection. I let out a long wail, pleasure slamming into me, all while Caleb is still seated in me.
It feels like it lasts forever and ever, even though I know it can’t be longer than several seconds. By the time I’m done, Havoc has pulled away, tracing my lips with his finger, and I take it into my mouth to suck needily on it as the last vestiges wash over me.
I slump back against Caleb, exhausted and sated and feeling almost safe but not quite there .
Caleb kisses the back of my neck, over and over. “Good pet. Good pet,” he whispers.
Havoc sits down next to us and twines his fingers with mine. “Fuck. I hate how hot you make sex,” he says to Caleb, and I manage a small laugh. Then he squeezes my hand. “You good, Seven?”
I nod, exhaling slowly, and close my eyes. “Yes,” I tell him. I want to say more, but I don’t know how to find the words to tell him that I’m better than okay… even if I know that once I come down, I won’t even be close to all right.
Because now they know about her , and they’ll want to know more, and I don’t want to even think about it — let alone talk about it.
But for now, I’m fine, better than fine, and that…
That will have to do.