Chapter 45
forty-five
. . .
Bex
Nick stares at me, his mouth slack. I’m almost self-conscious, and everything in me screams to cover up, except the heat in his blazing emeralds and the growing bulge in his jeans keep me pinned to the spot.
“See something you like?” My voice comes out mostly steady.
He starts, and then he’s launching himself across the room, practically tackling me to the bed.
“I love you,” he murmurs, before he takes my mouth in a soul-consuming kiss.
With me naked, and him fully clothed, it creates a power imbalance that I’m growing to love. He lets me cede control as often as I need it, and when I’m ready to regain my power, he gives it up to me. Our relationship is all about give and take, and we both give as much as we take.
He breaks the kiss to bury his face in my neck. The scratch of his beard on my skin makes me squirm, and he chuckles, laving the sensitive spot beneath my ear.
Trailing kisses down my neck, he inches down my body. He spends a good deal of time kissing the inside of my breasts, his fingers kneading the flesh and plucking at my nipples. Desire shoots down my spine and coils deep in my gut, and I wrap my legs around his torso, holding him to me.
His hands don’t skim over my curves; they embrace me, touching all of me. Where before I’d be uncomfortable when he touched my rolls or my belly, now, seeing the way he worships me, all of me, I feel desirable. Sexy.
He did that.
I still remember the way I stood before him in that hotel room, the way he forced me to look at my body as he pleasured me. How I wasn’t ready to accept my body for what it was. How I was ashamed.
Now, I’m comfortable in my skin in a way I never have been before. I know he loves me and my body, not despite it. He makes me feel wanted. Seen.
And where before that would make me vulnerable, now, I simply feel… cherished.
“Need you,” I whimper, as he kisses below my belly button.
“I’ve got you,” he murmurs, before scooting down the bed and burying his face in my pussy. He draws my legs over his shoulders, nearly suffocating between my thighs.
He’s told me over and over that this is where he wants to live. I’m getting used to sitting on his face, but this—where I can look down and see the bliss on his face? This is my favorite.
Nick slides a finger inside me, and I clench down, needing more. When he slips in a second, I feel the fullness all the way inside my throat. It consumes me, threatening to pull me under.
I never knew sex could be like this. Sure, my friends talk about how much better it is when they’re in loving relationships, but I never really believed it. I thought it was an exaggeration.
But now? With the two of us committed to each other, committed to our future? Knowing how much he loves me, and I love him? There’s simply nothing like it.
My fingers thread through his hair, stroking through the soft strands. At my request, he’s grown it out a little, so it’s long enough for me to grip. He loves when I run my hand through it, and I love when he pushes into my palm like he can’t get enough.
Like he is now. Like he can’t decide whether he wants affection or to bring me to the brink.
Which he does so effectively.
He moans into my pussy, the vibration on my clit sending me soaring.
“Nick, I—”
The pressure of his mouth on me increases, and with a gasp, my orgasm crashes into me. I’m powerless to the waves of pleasure racking through me, and when I finally come up for air, it’s like my whole body lights up like a city at dusk, glowing and unsteady.
He trails kisses along the inside of my thighs, letting me float back to earth. I reach for him, realizing for the first time that he’s still dressed.
“Need you naked.”
“Later,” he murmurs, kissing me softly before covering my body with his.
Ahhhh, the good tingles. The added weight sends even more endorphins pinging around my brain. The deep pressure relaxes my sympathetic nervous system, and I wrap my arms around him, needing him close. His scent soothes me, familiar and intoxicating. I’ll never get used to it. To him.
The rough scrape of his jeans, the jut of his hard cock against my hip, it all grounds me in this moment. Any leftover tension eases out of my muscles, and I’m boneless against the mattress. My eyes are so heavy, I can barely keep them open.
Nick kisses me gently. “Go to sleep.”
“But you didn’t come.”
“Another time. I’m not keeping score.”
He rolls off me, and I turn onto my side, watching as he pulls off his shirt and drops his jeans. Still wearing his boxer briefs, he walks to the bathroom, brushing his teeth and washing his face. He returns to me a few moments later, crawling into bed beside me.
And that’s when I pounce.
I climb on top of him, straddling his lap. “Nick, I need you.”
His green eyes heat with desire, and his cock jerks beneath me. “Bex Marie, I—”
“Please. Don’t make me wait.”
When I reach for the waistband of his briefs, he lifts his hips to allow me to remove the fabric. I settle on top of him, naked skin on naked skin. His eyes roll back in his head, and he thrusts against me, his cock, sticky with precum, sliding against my dripping cunt.
“Honey…”
I’m on birth control, and we’ve both been tested, but I know too many people who’ve had oopsie accidents, so condoms are still needed. At least for now. Until we’re ready for the possibility.
I reach for the foil square on the bedside table, the one I set out in anticipation. I tear it open, then roll the polyurethane down his shaft, and Nick gives his length a few strokes as I grab the lube, covering his cock.
He coaxes me up, notching himself at my entrance. I glide down his thick cock, so fucking full I can barely breathe.
In this position, I call the shots. I control how deep I take him, how fast. He says he’s not into femdom, but he loves when I take the lead. When I take what I need.
His hands land on my hips, fingertips digging into my ass. As I lift up and sink down, he thrusts up to meet me, pleasure blooming on his face.
“Bex Marie, I love you so fucking much,” he murmurs. “You make me so fucking happy.”
“Ditto.” I can hardly breathe, my entire body lit up.
“Ditto?” He smirks.
“Can’t talk.” I drop onto my hands and knees, covering his body with mine. “Love you,” I whisper, before I kiss him.
He wraps his arms around me, and the next thing I know, he slips out of me, rolls me onto my back, and thrusts back inside.
The air grows thick with the scent of sex and sweat. I’ll never get tired of it. Of this. Of him.
And when I come again, his name on my lips, it doesn’t take long for him to follow me over the edge. His entire body flushes and his face is aglow with pleasure as he comes.
Once again, he drops onto me, nearly smothering me. His arms slide beneath the pillow, cradling my head. He wraps me up in his embrace. And as a wave of sleepiness washes over me, I realize this is exactly where I want to be.
For tonight.
And forever.