4. Charlie
The bubbles from the—admittedly disgusting —IPA I’d ordered steadily rose towards the top of my pint glass as whatever team that was vying for the national hockey title skated for the goal. I didn’t follow sports—well, not unless you counted the OVWatch league world championships, which most people didn’t—so I didn’t really have a dog in the race when it came to wanting someone to win.
The blue team, I guess?
My phone buzzed on the table, rattling along the wooden surface and I tapped the glass screen, making it glow to life.
Still not Jesse. I wasn’t worried though, he wasn’t the type to bail without saying anything. Plus, we hadn’t managed to hang out in person in forever, I knew both of us needed this.
…Right?
It didn’t help that I was slammed with work, even after moving back from the northern coast my schedule was still packed—meetings, deadlines, and deliverables didn’t stop just because I wasn’t the CEO. I just didn’t have to care about the shareholders as much. The only time I’d really managed to take off in the last three months was smack in the middle of Jesse’s streams—which I watched just about every day, but still. It wasn’t the same as an IRL hang.
Things with Jesse had always been… complicated , at least for me.
They toddled through life without a care in the world. Popular. Easy going. But me?
I was in high school when I realized I had the biggest crush on them. Sort of a dick move, given I’d had a girlfriend but the heart—and raging teenage alpha hormones—wants what it wants, I guess.
I was awkward, too lanky, and the furthest from popular you could get.
That Jesse continued to give me the time of day even as they excelled socially… It meant a lot.
One minute we were just chilling, same as always. Jesse doing homework while I fucked around on my phone. A common situation, and one that annoyed the shit out of Jesse.
He’d always had to work twice as hard as I did at school. Which wasn’t really fair, since most of the time I couldn’t be fucked to do my assignments until the absolute last minute.
“You’ll never get anywhere like that,” he said from his desk, his nose so close to the equation he was trying to solve it was like the answer was baked into the molecules of the paper.
“I’ll be fine,” I replied breezily, entirely unconcerned with my friend’s plight. Besides, this butler wasn’t going to transform his employer’s garden by himself. He needed my intense pattern recognition and ability to match tiles! And who was going to pick out the right stonework for the fence?
Clearly not him.
It was crucial, intensely urgent work.
The light above me was suddenly blocked by shadow. I looked up, finding Jesse standing above me—and my entire planet shifted on its axis.
I’d always thought they were attractive, not that it was exactly a novel assessment. His strong jaw, straight white teeth, and deep brown eyes framed by thick lashes had always made them traditionally handsome. But there was something about seeing him like that, a smug smile on his face cast into the deep shadows of the overhead light. Shaggy light locks falling in his face, not quite curly but not quite just wavy either, falling somewhere heavenly in the middle.
Even now, I could remember the butterflies. My heart had jumped from my chest to my stomach, to my throat, and to my ass in a matter of seconds.
“C’mon, man. How’re we supposed to go to the same college if you don’t get good grades?”
I swallowed around the rapidly beating lump in my throat. I felt like a bumbling fool but lucky for me Jesse was so oblivious he didn’t seem to notice that I was in the middle of a crisis.
To be fair, Jesse never noticed how I felt about him. Or if he did, he was polite enough not to say anything.
Our friendship was too important to me to risk over a crush anyway. If he’d rejected me… I shuddered at the thought. There were just some things you could never take back.
I’d rather go the rest of my life carrying this secret than do something to risk what we had.
“Good thing you’re tall and easy to spot,” Jesse called from behind me.
I turned, a crooked smile teasing onto my face without permission as my eyes landed on him. Still just as handsome as he was back then, even more so now that he was covered in tattoos and had a cute septum piercing through his nose.
As a beta, Jesse wasn’t the biggest guy, but what he didn’t have in height or muscle mass, he’d more than made up for with the warmest aura I’d ever encountered in my life. It was like everything he touched just got better .
My heart thundered the way it did every time he was around, but I suppressed it. He didn’t need me to complicate things between us. And neither did I.
“I’m not that tall, you’re just short,” I said easily, ruffling his hair as he draped himself onto a stool at my side.
Close like this, I was able to catch a whisper of his faint lemon scent. It wasn’t anywhere near as potent as an omega, but it was there, and—there was something else too. A fruity sharpness that made my mouth water.
God he smelled so fucking… good .
Had he switched shampoos since the last time I’d seen him?
New cologne? Perfume?
Jesse playfully swatted me away. “I’m not short, I’m just not a freakishly tall alphahole like you.”
I put my hand to my chest like I’d been mortally wounded, dramatically leaning back in my stool. “Freakish? Alphahole??”
“You called me short first,” he defended with a playful shove to my shoulder.
Before I could barb him back the bartender came over and dropped off the second round of drinks I’d ordered. An admittedly horrifying, overly sweet cocktail for Jesse, and something that didn’t taste like whatever the grasshoppers in A Bug’s Life were eating looked like for me.
“Ooooh,” they cooed excitedly. “You know me so well!” He pulled the dark red, fizzy concoction forward, picking up the toothpick with a pair of cinnamon-marinated cherries on it, putting the first between his teeth to drag into his mouth.
My jaw fell open slightly as I watched him suck it between his lips, a droplet of juice escaping to dribble down his chin.
Jesus. Fuck.
“You always remember my favorite,” he said, using his thumb to wipe the droplet away before picking up the short glass and tossing some of it back.
I slid my Manhattan forward, sipping it slowly to let the burn of the whiskey and the sour of the bitters snap me back to the present.
“Who could forget that monstrosity?”
He gasped, pulling it closer as though to protect the glass from my judgment. “Black cherry cosmos are a gift to this world and I will hear nothing of your criticism, sir.” They took another sip of the disastrously sweet drink with an overly showboaty, satisfied hum.
I rolled my eyes, if only to cover the way that I desperately wished to be that glass.
I’d only been as attracted as I was to Jesse to someone else once before… and, unfortunately for me, gangly geeky alphas with confidence issues and bottom energy didn’t really stand a chance with an omega like that .
“So,” he turned to me in that way he did when they wanted to talk about themselves, but felt like they needed to be polite and ask about me first. “What’s new with you? Any more businesses selling for millions?”
I laughed, same old Jesse.
No fucking tact.
I’d dropped out of college in my second year to pursue ScentCX, a database system that used DNA markers to create scent-matching profiles for alphas and omegas. It’d been tough at first, a lot of long nights building the prototype software and nearly a year of living on my friend and business partner Cameo’s couch while we pitched investors. Eventually, we signed a deal with FinCorp and made enough money to live on… forever. It’d meant moving to a new city to help them with setup and product finalization, which had been a bit of a drag on the personal life side but was awesome professionally.
Our invention.
My invention, really.
It was real . And, it was helping people.
Where Cameo opted to become totally hands-off and return to his family business, I’d decided to stay on with the project. Taking the title of COO—fancy pencil-pushing corporate talk for a guy who sat in on way too many meetings that could’ve been an email.
“Nope, still just coasting,” I said with a shrug.
Jesse rolled his eyes. “Don’t act like you’re not busy. I haven’t seen you since you’ve moved back.”
I twirled my glass on the hard top of the bar. “Well that’s because you stream in the evening when I’m off, but I always watch. Besides, it’s only been a couple of weeks.”
They grinned. “I know. I can see you there. Name lit up like a firework since someone is always my biggest dono. You know what they call you right? My whale.”
“I’m just supporting your work.” I countered, feeling the tips of my ears burn.
Jesse rolled their eyes. “Gifting a hundred subs a stream is more than support , Charlie.”
I waited for them to blush, but they kept their cards close to their chest now. In the beginning, they were weird about how much I donated, as if I was trying to buy our friendship or something. It took a while, but eventually, I was able to wear him down, finally convincing Jesse I was only trying to support his work.
Okay, so maybe I pressed the issue by buying him a top-of-the-line soundboard instead. Telling him it was either cash or lavish gifts… Apparently, in the Jesse world of acceptable presents, donations were better than finding giant boxes from Rainforest on his doorstep.
I shrugged. “I’ve been good. Nothing new really, just same old same old…”
We both finished our drinks and ordered another, the same for each. The IPA left to gather dust where it belonged.
“You should get out more,” he insisted.
I shrugged. “I’ve always been a homebody.”
“Is the homebody at least seeing someone? If not me, maybe,” they mock gasped, “a girl ?”
I coughed, almost choking on my drink as the burning liquid went down the wrong pipe. Jesse slapped my back, which didn’t actually help, but I appreciated it anyway.
“Definitely not,” I laugh coughed, still trying to catch my breath.
They pursed their lips, narrowing their eyes in irritation. “I don’t know why you say it like that. You’re a catch.”
Yeah, but I only have eyes for you, it was the same thing I thought every time we had this conversation.
Had I had hookups since I realized how I felt? Sure. And early on I even tried dating, but there was no use. None of them were Jesse and playing the comparison game always made me feel fucking gross.
So, I stuck to my random hookups when needed and mostly spent my ruts alone. It wasn’t the most ideal, but it would just never work out otherwise.
Though, there was a moment… A weekend I’d spent in a Heat Hotel with an omega that plagued my every thought for months afterward. But the timing was off, and by the time my life settled enough that I could contact her again, so much time had passed that I was sure I’d missed my opportunity.
“I just don’t want to commit,” I said, the familiar half-truth slipping easily from my lips.
“I still don’t get where those commitment issues come from,” Jesse said absently, playing with the little lime green bendy straw sticking out of his drink.
The long blink at them would probably have been obvious to anyone else, but even when I knew I was acting a fool, Jesse hardly noticed. Or maybe I’d always been so weird around him, that it just seemed normal.
Or maybe, he didn’t care enough to bring it up either way.
“Speaking of commitment,” they said, the excited edge to their voice warning we’d finally arrived at the topic that they actually wanted to discuss, shaking me from my thoughts. “Things with Tara are going really well.”
The hearts in his eyes made me want to crush the glass between my fingers back into sand, but I managed to force out an altogether convincing, “That’s great.”
A bit overly enthusiastic, my tongue nearly tripping over the words, but it did the trick.
Sort of insult to injury that the only girl I’d had real interest in had the same name as Jesse’s new girlfriend.
It’s like God just loved to laugh at me.
Or, you know, maybe it was punishment for being such a coward.
They nodded. “She’s just so… amazing . I don’t know how else to put it. The other night we went out to one of those pottery places and made mugs for each other's places. She did mine orange, obviously . Little cowboy hats and everything.”
My smile was tight, but still genuine. Seeing them happy made me happy, even if it wasn’t with me.
And yeah, a little jealous too.
“ Anyway , my point is, it’s getting more serious between us, and it’d mean a lot to me if you met her. Her lease is up soon, so I asked her if she wanted to find a place together… and I just think, you know. This could be it for me.”
I froze with my glass halfway to my lips. “You did? You do?” He’d never introduced me to anyone he dated before, at least not on purpose. There was one occasion where we were out and we saw their dickhead ex with someone else and I had to get dragged off before I throttled the cunt, but never for a positive reason.
And moving in? That was entirely unheard of.
They nodded. “You know how important you are to me, and I never wanted to introduce you to someone who I didn’t think would last, but I’m sure now, she seems like… y’know.”
I didn’t mean to raise my hackles, but I couldn’t help myself. I didn’t know a ton about the girl Jesse was seeing.
Brunette, big boobs—their assessment, not mine—and an omega. That usually meant alphas. At least one of them. Being lavished with gifts and courting and—usually not quiet little lives with nerdy gamer betas. No matter how hot they were.
“Isn’t she an omega?”
Jesse’s demeanor tightened instantly. “She is. Not that I see why that should matter.”
“Aren’t you concerned about her… wanting a pack?”
They blew out a breath, studying the TV with little interest. “We’ve talked about it. She’s been clear she’s not interested in a pack. It’s too much for her. And though she said she wasn’t interested now, I told her if she ever wanted to consider an alpha I’d be open to it. I’m not dense about her situation. I know this whole Heat Hotel thing sucks for her.”
“I didn’t think you were,” I said easily. “I just don’t want to see you hurt.”
At those words, they softened, their gaze finding me again. “I know. You’ve always looked out for me, but I’m sure about her. She’s special.”
“If she’s this important to you then I definitely need to meet her.”
“I knew you’d want to,” he said happily. “You’re gonna love her. She loves games just as much as we do.”
“I would hope so with the career choice.” Though I’d never spoken to her one on one, we’d played matches of OVWatch together, and she was pretty kickass, for a Nova main at least. “She swear as much in real life as she does in game?”
Jesse laughed. “Nah, that's mostly for the camera. You know how it is, gotta play it up for the viewers. She even puts on this slightly higher voice than normal.”
Curiosity outweighed jealousy momentarily. “How much does she change for the camera?”
There was an almost sheepish quality to Jesse that I didn’t see often at the question, the back of their neck heating bright pink. “I, uh, I actually kind of wanted to talk to you about that.”
“What about it?”
“You know how I told you about her SLCK’d page?”
“Not that I’ve ever gone looking for it,” I said with a shrug. They mentioned it the day after they thought she was going to break up with them, but told him she was a spicy streamer instead. It was the first time he talked about her.
“Yeah, well… she’s asked me if I wanted to come on her stream.”
“Oh.” I swallowed hard. “You think you’ll do it?”
“Wouldn’t you?” Jesse asked as they pulled out their phone, bringing up a picture in his camera roll and turning it towards me.
For the second time in my life, Jesse was entirely unaware that he’d made my world shift entirely.
Tara.
His girlfriend Tara.
Was the same girl from the Heat Hotel.
“I-I—” I stammered, feeling the tips of my ears burn.
“I know, right?” Jesse said proudly, looking at the photo with a dreamy smile that meant he was entirely oblivious to the immense amount of emotional turmoil I was enduring. “The thing is, she makes like… alpha/omega fetish porn? So usually she’s pretending to be submissive and that’s just—” they let out a sharp little laugh. “Not her.”
“She’s, uh—” The memory of Tara begging to be fucked through a glory hole, her slick dripping to practically pool on the floor from being so wet after giving me the single most mind-bending blow job of my life surfaced and I had to shift on my stool, begging my traitorous cock not to rise. “Not?”
My cock didn’t listen. I leaned forward, resting my elbow on the table to lean my chin into my palm, hoping that hunching would be enough to hide the obvious swelling against my zipper.
“No, not at all,” Jesse said, fiddling with his glass. “She’s super dominant, and I’m not sure how comfortable I am with fucking like… a character I guess?”
“It’s sort of like any job then, isn’t it?” I asked, clearing my throat. “Like you’d just clock in and out.”
“Yeah, I guess… But I don’t know. I’m not sure I want sex with my girlfriend to be… transactional like that?”
“Makes sense,” I said thoughtfully, though it was purely selfish motivation that urged on my next words. “I think I’d give it a go anyway. See if I was into it. Might discover something about yourself.”
And fulfill every fantasy I’d spent the last year jerking off to, but it wasn’t like I could say that .
He hummed. “Yeah, maybe I’ll think about it more. I guess I’m kind of worried about the sponsorship side, you know how brands are with being ad-friendly.”
“Fuck ‘em, you deserve to live the life you want without having to worry about what a company's tolerance for sex workers is.”
“Yeah… But it is my career too I guess…”
“You don’t have to decide today, right?”
He shook his head. “Nah, and I think… I mean I think I do want to try it, I just need to think about all the factors.”
I nodded. “Yeah, but it's the internet—scandals aren’t forever.”
Jesse laughed. “Isn’t that the truth?”
“Soooo,” I drew the word out, my eagerness getting the better of me. “When can I meet her?”
The beta nudged my arm playfully, making my elbow slip and I had to catch myself. “You just want to fuck her, don’t you? Big old ass alpha pervert.”
I rolled my eyes, my laugh coming out a little too forced. “As if. She’s important to you, so she’s important to me. Besides…” I smirked, wagging my eyebrows. “I watch all your streams, probably should watch you get topped too.”
“You are so fucking gross, dude,” Jesse laughed, though, for a moment… it was like he couldn’t quite meet my eye.
Maybe I imagined it.
“Just let me know when and I’ll be there.”
Jesse cleared his throat, steepling his fingers. “So, about this single thing… Tara has this friend, Eva—and before you say no, she’s a gamer too?—”
Oh god .