11. Stained Glass
Stained Glass
We moved back into the living room, the two tall lamps casting a hazy glow around the space, making it feel cozy.
I sank down into the plush couch and pulled her on top of me, her legs planted on each side of me.
As she settled herself, I took in more of her space.
Her walls were a deep green with lots of natural wooden shelves, dotted with small plants and books.
An occasional picture frame balanced as well.
The large windows had long sheer curtains that made the space feel more open but still provided coverage.
It was welcoming and cozy—so very Allie.
“So tell me a little bit about your mom and sister. What are they like?” I asked Allie while she lay against me.
I was two seconds away from taking her against that counter earlier, but I knew I needed to slow down.
Allie needed to know I was in this for her, not just what I could get from her.
She wasn’t another conquest, not another notch in the bedpost. No, she was much more. That I was certain of.
I could feel her laugh against me before she answered, “Lord help
where to start. I guess with my mom, Donna, she’s been a nurse for over twenty years now, and still going strong.
Single mom of two for the last nineteen years, and she’s done all she can for us growing up, while working too.
She loves all kinds of music and singing.
It’s where my love of it comes from. I think her favorite is 90s country or 80s rock, though.
She’s also a very stubborn woman who always has to be right.
” She paused and rolled her eyes, and a smirk danced across her lips as she tapped her finger against them as she thought of what to say next.
“Then you have my sister, Olivia, who just turned seventeen, so we have all those lovely teenage hormones that drive everyone around them insane and low-key fear for their life. She’s incredibly sassy, but so talented.
She’s very active in theater, has been all growing up, and she also volunteers with her old elementary and middle school when she can to help them with their productions.
” Allie smiled to herself, reminiscing on the past with her sister.
“It’s crazy to me because it used to be the other way around.
I was the one in production and volunteering at her school when she was little.
Now she’s graduating this year. I think she could make it far too, and I’m not only saying that since I’m her sister.
She’s so talented and so dedicated. I want her to have the options and life I wasn’t able to.
She has a chance to chase her dreams that I didn’t, and I don’t want to see anything holding her back. ”
I could see the hint of sadness in her eyes from missing out on her own dreams, but it was so overpowered by the love of her sister and mom that I couldn’t help but admire her even more.
“You care a lot about her, don’t you?” Reaching up, I twirled a piece of hair around my finger as she gathered her thoughts. A smile played on her full lips as she did.
“I do, I had a rough childhood growing up, and I didn’t want that
for her. I know she’s only my sister, but I can’t help it.”
“Do you mind me asking what happened?” She’d mentioned her father
wasn’t around, and it had been just her, Olivia, and Donna for a long time, but I couldn’t help but wonder why exactly.
“It’s kind of a lot, and I don’t want to send you running for the hills.” She worried her bottom lip between her teeth, and I could feel her body tense.
“I promise I won’t run for any hills, mountains, or rivers.
” I made an X over my heart to show how serious I was.
You could see her moving the pieces of her life around in her head, trying to figure out where to start, what to share.
Nothing she could say scared me off. I saw the moment she landed on her starting point, I could see the walls fortify behind her eyes.
“Remember how I told you my dad left and how we were better off without him?” She was still biting her bottom lip, so I reached up and popped it free before she hurt it.
I slowly nodded. “Yes, I do.” It came out in a low whisper, and I could feel her shift uncomfortably under me before she went on.
“Well, he wasn’t a good person. Like at all. My mom worked all the time
because there was always some reason he couldn’t or wouldn’t keep a job, so it was usually him and me at home.
He would constantly make me do stuff so he didn’t have to.
I had to clean everything, do all the laundry, and he even made me take his socks and shoes off or help put them on.
If he was upset, he took it out on me, no matter what he was angry at.
” She paused, taking in a deep breath, her eyes glassy with restrained tears.
My heart physically hurt for her, knowing she had to deal with this at such a young age.
I get that her mom wasn’t home, but she really had no clue?
Allie cleared her throat, bringing me back to the present, and she continued on.
“There was this one time he was so mad because he thought I threw his cigarettes away. He chased me around the living room, and I ran to one side of the couch, trying to get away, but I-I couldn’t.
He pushed the couch up against this hutch-type thing my mom had, and I couldn’t move.
I was stuck.” She let out a shaky breath and shook her head before pushing on, “I couldn't properly sit down for hours and had bruises left from the belt. All could be hidden with pants pretty easily. I was eight when it happened, almost nine. I never told my mom because I was scared of what would happen to me or to her. Even though I was young, I could see how exhausted and stressed she was, and in my mind I was doing the right thing because I loved her.” Her voice wobbled as she finished telling me of her past, and she kept taking deep breaths.
My heart shattered at this point. Knowing firsthand what the abuse of a parent was like, and the fact she had to experience that, hurt me.
I sat still because the anger bubbling up inside of me was terrifying. I haven’t felt anger this strong since before I left home. The fact that anyone could ever hurt her, hurt a child, made me sick to my stomach.
“Does he still try to talk to you?” The deadly calm voice that came out
didn’t sound like me.
She sat up and placed her hands on each side of my face, tears lining her lower lids, “Spence, hey, it’s okay.
It wasn’t the first time, it wasn’t the last, but I’ve gotten the help I needed, and I moved on.
To answer your questions, sometimes, yes, he does.
I have him blocked everywhere, but he’ll make new accounts and try to message me.
I block them and move on. If I happen to see him out in public, I leave before he sees me. It isn’t worth my peace.”
“He’d better hope I never see him because he may not walk away.” I
balled my hands into fists on her hips and then flexed them out, trying and failing to release the tension in my body.
“Hey, look at me. One, my plan is for that to never happen. Like ever.
Two, just don’t, okay? I want to move past that. It’s taken me a long time to get over my daddy issues, but I’m finally there, okay?”
I stared into her gentle hazel eyes, so confused about how anyone
could hurt this strong and fierce woman. “Okay, I promise.” She leaned down and kissed me softly on my forehead. I see why women love forehead kisses now.
“Gosh, it’s getting late. Time really flew by, didn’t it? Guess that’ll happen when you sit here and unpack stories.” I let her change the subject, sensing that she needed something to get her mind off those awful memories.
“I guess I’d better go since we both have work.” Letting out a deep
breath, I helped her up and gave some loving to Dolly before we both walked over to the door. “I had a fun day hanging out with you.”
“Me too, it was nice, all of it was.”
“Text me whenever you have time, okay? I know you said it’s going
to be busy, and I don’t want to distract you from work or family.” I pulled her into me and kissed her. I could kiss her forever, and I don’t think I’d ever lose the feelings of butterflies in my stomach.
“Mmm, I will, I promise. Text me when you’re home?”
“I promise I will, sweetheart.”
It was a little after one thirty when I pulled in front of my apartment. I quickly texted Allie, letting her know, and I’d text her tomorrow. It had been a long time since I was this happy and alive.
Thoughts of the evening swirled in my mind. I knew I’d be exhausted the next day, but it was all worth it. I’d skip the gym before work and go later in the day so I could get some extra rest.
Part of me originally had this uncertainty when I moved back, like maybe I wasn’t thinking it through all the way, but after meeting Allie, I knew I’d made the right decision.
Allie was concerned about us working together, but that was at the bottom of my list. In the grand scheme of things at Prestige Consultants, I wasn’t anyone of importance.
I took the IT job so I would be less stressed and have less on my plate.
Allie was someone there, and I respected her decision in wanting to play it safe.
I didn’t know where whatever’s happening between us was going to go or how long it was going to last, but I knew I wanted it to last as long as possible.
She made my life bright and brilliant like the sun dancing off a stained glass window, and she’d only been in it for a little bit.
I knew it sounded insane, believe me, I know, but I had this gut feeling she was going to be important in my life.
I was already hoping this busy week would go by quickly so I could see her again.
Obviously, I didn’t want to bother her when she had so much going on, but hopefully we could find some time to see each other.