Chapter 10 #4
Flabbergasted, Joe pulled back so he could see her face and was stunned to find tears rolling down her cheeks. “Of course that matters. Where’s this coming from, Janey?”
“It’s coming from me and the baby.” She rested her hand on her belly. “We didn’t plan to get pregnant yet, but we did, and now… Everything is different. I don’t want what I wanted a year ago. I want different things.”
“What things?”
“I want to be a mom. I want to be here with my family and your mom. I want our baby to be with his or her cousins every day, not just in the summer. I don’t want to miss anything.
” A sob hiccupped through her as the floodgates opened.
“And if I go back to school, I’ll be gone all day, and I’ll have to study all night. I’ll miss everything.”
Joe wiped the flood of tears from her face as he tried to process what she’d said. How had he missed this? How had he not seen she was this torn up?
“I’m sorry,” she whispered. “You’ve given up so much so we could spend the last two years in Ohio—”
“I didn’t give up anything. I got to be with you, which was the only thing I wanted. There was hardly any sacrifice involved in that.”
“Still, you know what I mean. You went to so much trouble, and it might be for nothing.”
“It hasn’t been for nothing, Janey. You’ve got two years of school done now that you didn’t have before. You’re halfway there.”
“But still a long way from the finish line. The baby will be running around and talking back to us by the time I’m done. I can’t spend two years being less than half a mother to this child, Joe. That’s not what I want. That’s not what he or she deserves.”
He ran his fingers through her soft blonde hair, thinking about what he should say and how he should say it. “I’m so sorry I didn’t pick up on this sooner. I hate that you’ve been this upset and I didn’t know.”
“It’s not your fault. I’ve been an emotional disaster area for months now. Victoria says it’s the hormones.”
They were quiet for a long time, each taking comfort from the closeness of the other. Joe’s mind raced with plans and implications and thoughts of the painting class he taught to freshman art students. None of that mattered when stacked up against what his beloved wife wanted and needed.
“What’ll we do, Joe?” she asked in a small voice that made him ache.
“To me, it seems rather simple.”
“It does?”
Nodding, he said, “You’ll take this year off from school, spend it with the baby, and then next summer, we’ll see how you feel about going back to finish. With your perfect grades, they’ll probably let you do whatever you want.”
“And you’d be okay with dragging out our time in Ohio even more than we already are?”
“If it means you’ll be happy, I’m fine with it. So what if it takes one more year than we’d planned. I would, however, really like to see you finish, but only because I suspect you might regret it someday if you don’t.”
“I probably would,” she said with a sigh.
“So we’ll take this year off from school and let you settle into being a mom?”
“I’d like that more than anything.”
“Then that’s what we’ll do.”
She let out a happy squeal and hugged him as tightly as she could with the big belly in the way.
After a minute, Joe realized she was crying again. “What? I thought you’d feel better now that we figured out a plan.”
“I do.”
“Then why are you crying?”
“I’m happy,” she said with a laugh. “I’m so happy.”
She killed him when she looked at him that way. “That’s all that matters.”
“You need to be happy, too.”
“If you are, then I am. That’s all it takes.”
Her hand on his face took his breath away. “I love you so much. I have to be the luckiest person in the whole world.”
“Nope. That’d be me.” He brushed away the last of her tears and kissed her.
She smiled at him as her hand moved from his face to the back of his neck. “Do we really have all afternoon free?”
“Mmm-hmm,” he said against her lips, reluctant to end the sweet kiss.
“You know what I could really use?”
“What’s that?”
“A nap.”
Intrigued, he said, “What kind of nap?”
She let loose with her sexiest grin. “The really good kind.”
“I could be talked into that.”
Her laughter warmed his heart as it always did. “You’re so easy, Captain.”
“Only with you. Put your arms around my neck and hold on tight.”
When she did as he directed, he slid his arms under her, scooping her up with a grunt and groan for effect that had her pinching him. “Not funny.”
“Yes, it was.” He stole another kiss as he carried her to the bedroom, where he was more than happy to help her out of her clothes and into bed.
When he joined her, she snuggled up to him as best she could. Wanting to get in on their embrace, the baby thumped around between them, making them laugh.
“Joe?”
His hands and eyes were on her belly, watching the baby move around inside her and marveling at the miracle of it all. “What, honey?”
“Thank you—for this love, this life, for understanding what I need. All of it. Thank you.”
“God, Janey,” he whispered, overwhelmed by her. “It’s my pleasure. Every second of it. Thank you.” He kissed her then, and for a long time, he thought of nothing else but her pleasure.