Chapter 4
I’ve completely lost my mind, Jenny thought as she clung to Alex’s muscular shoulders.
Even as she questioned her sanity, she knew she wasn’t about to send him away.
The guy was like sex on a stick, and for the first time in her life, it didn’t matter that she didn’t know him.
Nothing mattered but the way it felt to be held and kissed by someone who didn’t know about her terrible tragedy, who didn’t pity her from the word hello.
He hadn’t the first clue who she was, and she liked it that way.
As they emerged from the water, the heavy, sultry air only added to the erotically charged atmosphere.
And when he laid them down on the towels, Jenny felt his muscles bulge and strain under her hands.
He never missed a beat with the kiss, turning his head to deepen the angle, his tongue teasing and tempting her and making her forget the values she’d remained true to her entire life.
It felt too damned good to be held by a strong, sexy, confident man to think about values or future trips to the loony bin.
She’d cross that bridge when she got to it.
In the meantime, she was fully enjoying the protective way he held her, the sensual way he kissed her and the enticing strokes of his tongue, which were never too much but rather just right.
But suddenly it wasn’t enough to be close to him.
It wasn’t enough to kiss him and touch him.
She wanted more. Shifting onto her back, she tugged at him, encouraging him to move on top of her.
She hadn’t done anything like this in such a long time that she’d almost forgotten how to use her body to send the proper signals.
Jenny curled her leg around his hips, hoping he’d take the hint.
He did, and the pleasure flooded her. Almost of their own volition, her legs parted to welcome him into her embrace.
The groan that rumbled from his chest only added to the heated desire that thrummed through her bloodstream.
And then he shifted his hips and pushed the hard ridge of his erection against her, making her cry out from the punch of desire that slammed into her.
Alex broke the kiss, turning his attention to her neck, kissing from her ear to her throat and along her collarbone. He tugged at the bow behind her neck that anchored her bikini top. “Can I?” he asked gruffly.
The word no hovered on the tip of her tongue, but she couldn’t bring herself to say it.
She couldn’t bring herself to say anything at all, so she only nodded and then held her breath as he eased the top away from her straining breasts.
For the longest time he only looked at what he’d uncovered as the warm breeze had her nipples tightening unbearably.
Jenny squirmed under him, seeking relief of some kind or another.
“Easy,” he whispered. “I’m not going anywhere.”
It was the perfect thing for him to say. They had no time limit, no one waiting for either of them.
He bent his head over her chest.
“Wait.”
His forehead landed on her sternum. “What’s wrong?”
“You’re not married or anything, are you?”
“Hell no. I wouldn’t be here doing this with you if I had someone else. What about you?”
“Not married. Or anything.”
“Now that we’ve got that cleared up, can we get back to what we were doing?”
Though she wanted nothing more than to get back to what they’d been doing—because it was about to get even more interesting—she felt the need to clarify one thing. “That’s not exactly true.”
“Which part?”
“The ‘or anything’ part. I’ve been dating. Some. Here and there. Nothing serious, though.”
“Great. Glad we cleared that up. Green light to proceed?” As he spoke, his lips left a trail of fire over the tops of her breasts.
“One more thing.”
His deep sigh relayed a world of frustration. “I’m listening.”
She was almost afraid to say it because she didn’t want him to leave. Not yet anyway. “I won’t have sex with you.”
“Who said I wanted to have sex with you?”
Jenny raised her hips a fraction of an inch, putting her sex in direct contact with his straining cock and drawing a tortured hiss from him. “You did.”
His gruff chuckle made her smile. “I suppose I did, and I suppose I might’ve tried for a home run if you hadn’t set me straight. But for now,” he said, kissing his way to the valley between her breasts, “this is more than enough for me.”
Jenny wondered if it would be enough for her and berated herself for taking the home run off the table. If only she wasn’t so certain she’d hate herself in the morning…
When his lips closed around her nipple, she became quite certain she’d hate herself in the morning for saying no.
She grabbed handfuls of his long hair, holding on for dear life as he licked and sucked and bit.
Christ almighty, the pain of his teeth clamping down on her sensitive flesh nearly finished her right off.
He kept it up until she was nearly delirious from the pleasure, and then he shifted his attention to the other side.
The tight grip she kept on his hair had to be hurting him, but he didn’t say anything, and she didn’t dare let go. Jenny opened her eyes to look up at the star-laden sky as she arched her back, wanting to get closer to the heated torment of his mouth.
He stopped suddenly, his head dropping again to her chest.
“What’s wrong?” Jenny tuned in to the heavy sounds of his breathing and the lap of the waves against the shore.
“Do you want me to stop?”
“Not particularly.”
“So it would be okay if I kissed you here?” His lips landed on her belly, making her skin quiver.
“Mmm.”
“How about here?” he asked, moving lower.
“That’s good, too.” I’m not going to let him do that, am I? Apparently, I am. Oh my God, I have to put a stop to this madness. That’s what it is. Utter madness.
Alex untied the bows at her hips, and her bathing suit bottoms fell away, leaving her completely naked in the moonlight.
“Is this legal on Gansett Island?” Jenny muttered.
Alex laughed and continued to kiss her belly as he settled between her legs. “Do you honestly care?”
“I don’t do this.”
“Don’t do what?”
“This. With men I barely know or men I just met or well, anyone.”
“Well, that’s a damned shame. Why not?”
“That’s an awfully long story, and this isn’t the time or the place.”
“I wouldn’t mind hearing your awfully long story sometime, but you’re right about the time and place. I’ve got other things on my mind at the moment.”
“I can’t.” But even as she moaned the words, she tightened her grip on his hair. She wasn’t sure if she planned to pull him closer or push him away.
“Yes, you can.” The rasp of his whiskers against her belly made a liar out of her as she arched into him, trying to get closer.
Fully aware of his destination as he kissed his way down her body, Jenny knew she had to stop him now, while she still could.
She’d had sex a couple of times since Toby died, but she’d never allowed this.
It seemed too intimate an act to do with a guy she didn’t love.
So why was she allowing Alex’s broad shoulders to part her legs or his big, rough hands to cup her bottom to position her the way he wanted her?
For the longest time, he only hovered, as if giving her a final chance to truly say no. She didn’t say no. She didn’t say anything, because her brain refused to function properly. By the time he pressed his tongue into her folds, she was on the verge of begging him to hurry up.
Toby had been good at this. Alex was, too.
He licked and sucked and bit… Jesus… And then he pushed two fingers into her, and she came hard, her legs shaking violently.
He backed off, but only for a second before he was back for more, starting all over again as if he hadn’t just delivered one of the most powerful orgasms of her life.
In her right mind, she’d be wondering how he’d managed to keep the encounter entirely sand-free, but he’d done that as smoothly as he’d done everything else so far.
“I want another one,” he said in that raspy voice.
“I can’t.”
“You said that before, and you did.” He flexed his fingers deep inside her and bent his head to prove her wrong.
Usually she was too sensitive after the first one to go for two, but he powered through the sensitivity and had her coming again less than five minutes later. Utter insanity.
Apparently, satisfied with himself and his handiwork, Alex crawled up her body while keeping his fingers planted deep inside her. He sucked hard on her left nipple, making her moan, before continuing to her mouth, where he kissed her with deep thrusts of his tongue, which bore her flavor.
“You are so fucking hot.” His coarse words, uttered against her lips, made her tingle all over. “Mmm,” he whispered, stroking his fingers through the flood of moisture between her legs, “someone likes dirty talk. I’ll have to remember that for next time.”
Next time…
Those two words finally snapped her out of the sexual stupor he’d seduced her into.
She pushed at his shoulders, wanting him off her immediately.
Naturally, he resisted her efforts to dislodge him, flexing his fingers to remind her he was still inside her, as if she needed the reminder. “Please. Stop.”
He immediately withdrew his fingers from between her legs and rolled off her onto his back. They stayed like that, side by side, breathing hard as the heavy night air washed over them.
Jenny’s legs continued to tremble as her core pulsed with the aftereffects of two scorching orgasms. Her eyes burned with tears that she refused to shed.
She was thirty-seven years old and had never done anything even remotely close to this.
She had no reason to feel ashamed and yet… Somehow that was exactly how she felt.
“Are you okay?”
He had to go and be sweet to her, which only made her feel worse. “I’m fine.”
“What’s wrong?” Alex raised himself up on one elbow so he could look down at her.
“Nothing.”
“Are you having regrets?”
“Well, yeah. Duh.”
“Why? We didn’t do anything wrong.”