Book 24 Temptation After Dark #9
His words have opened a door she’s kept firmly shut.
He’s making her yearn for things that aren’t meant for her.
Gigi has learned to stay in her lane, to keep her circle small and not to want more than she deserves.
The life she has now is a dream come true from where she started as an emancipated teenager struggling to survive.
The last thing in the world she needs is a man to threaten everything she’s worked so hard to achieve. No matter how successful she becomes, she never stops feeling as if she’s still suspended on a high wire without a net to catch her if she trips and falls. Tripping and falling is not an option.
Jordan makes her a drink and asks her what happened.
Gigi tells her that she slept with Cooper and that he said some things that don’t matter because it isn’t going to happen.
When Gigi mentions that Cooper texted her, Jordan grabs her phone and reads the texts.
Jordan starts typing on Gigi’s phone, and only because she’s sleep-deprived does it take her a second to realize she shouldn’t let that happen. “What are you doing?”
“Responding to the poor guy.”
Pregnancy or not, Gigi lunges for the phone and succeeds in spilling the last of her drink and the ice all over Jordan, who never flinches as she holds the phone out of reach to finish her text. “What the hell are you saying to him?”
“I’m telling him you’d love to see him to discuss this further.”
“Oh, my God! I’m going to stab you!”
“No, you aren’t. You’re going to pull yourself together and talk to him like the adult you are.”
“No, I’m not. I can’t see him again.”
Jordan tells Gigi she isn’t feeling well and she needs Gigi to hang with her until Mason gets home. A short time later, Gigi looks up, and Cooper is standing at the door with a bouquet of flowers in his hands.
“You total bitch,” she whispers to Jordan.
“Someday, you’ll thank me.”
“Today is not that day.”
“Cooper, come in,” Jordan says. “I was just leaving to do some, uh, errands. Won’t be back for hours. Mason is working late. The place is all yours.” As she walks by Cooper, Jordan squeezes his arm, letting him know she’s firmly on Team Cooper.
Worst best friend ever.
“She sent that text telling me to meet you here, not you,” he says.
“Ding, ding, ding. Tell him what he’s won, Johnny.”
“I’ll go,” he says.
“It’s okay. You can stay.” Despite her fierce desire to protect herself from whatever this is shaping up to be, she can’t bear to hurt him. Not to mention that being willing to leave, if that’s what she wants him to do, earns him major points.
“I’m sorry. It’s not you. It’s me.”
“Didn’t they make a movie with that title?”
“Maybe, but in this case, it’s true. You want things I’m not capable of giving you.”
“What things do I want?”
“A commitment. A relationship.” She wrinkles her nose as she says the dreaded word. “Emotions that don’t exist in me.”
He takes a seat, resting his elbows on his knees and leans toward her. “You know what makes me so damned sad?”
She really doesn’t want to know because it makes her sad to know something is making him sad. Ugh. “What?”
“The way you sell yourself so short.”
“I don’t do that.”
“Yes, you do. You think you have nothing to give me or anyone, so you act as if this sort of thing could never happen for you.”
“It’s not that I think it can’t happen for me. It’s that I don’t want it to. Can you see the difference?”
“Yes, I can see the difference, but how do you know you don’t want it when you’ve never had it?”
“I’m almost thirty years old, Coop. I’ve seen a lot of things in my life. I know what I want and what I don’t, and it wouldn’t be fair to a nice guy like you to let you get involved with someone like me—”
“Someone like you. What does that mean?”
“I’m damaged, Cooper! I don’t have the same emotions other people have.
You deserve someone who can truly care for you the way you deserve to be cared for, and that person is not me.
” Her chin quivers, and her eyes fill, infuriating her.
She’s always in control of herself and her emotions, except, it seems, when Cooper James is around.
He moves to sit next to her on the sofa and puts his arm around her, drawing her in close to him.
As he kisses the top of her head, he says, “You’re not damaged.
You’ve had some stuff happen, some painful stuff that’ll always be part of who you are, but you’re beautiful and sweet and funny and so worthy of love. ”
Gigi is going to lose it if he keeps that up. She tries to pull free of him, but he only holds her closer.
“You have no reason to be afraid of me.”
“I have every reason to be afraid of you.”
“Nah.”
“Yah.”
“I want you to listen to me, okay?” His lips are soft against her neck as he kisses his way to her ear.
“I will never do anything to hurt you. I promise. I want only to make you happy, to make you smile, to make you laugh.” Rocking against her, he adds, “To make you come. You’re safe with me, Gigi.
I swear on the lives of everyone I love that you can count on me to be there for you no matter what happens, if only you’ll let me be. ”
“Cooper,” she says, gasping as she breaks the kiss. “Wait. I’m not sure I should…”
“You should, Gigi. You really should, because everyone deserves to have someone who loves them more than anyone else does.”
“And that’s what you want? To love me more than anyone else?”
“Yeah, I think that’s what I want.”
“Forever?”
“I sure as hell hope it lasts forever.”
“How do you see this working? Not that I’m saying yes to any of your craziness. I’m asking hypothetically.”
“I’m glad you asked, because I’ve given that a lot of thought.
I’d like to move forward with my party boat business here on Gansett, but that’s a summertime gig.
What if we lived here in the summer and in LA the rest of the year?
That way, you’d get built-in time with Jordan, Nikki and Evelyn every summer. ”
Her heart hammers in her chest. He makes it sound so easy, so possible. “And what would you do the rest of the year?”
“I’d manage my portfolio—and yours, if you’d like.”
“Wow, you’ve got it all figured out.”
“Not all of it, but it’s a start.”
Gigi looks at him for a long moment, gathering her thoughts and her defenses. “This is happening too fast for me.”
“Okay.”
“What does that mean? ‘Okay.’”
“It means just what you think. If it’s too fast for you, we’ll slow it down and take our time. We can see where we are when it’s time for you to go home to LA.”
“What about what I said earlier, how I don’t want this for myself?”
“I heard you, but here’s my thought on that. You’ve never had this, so how do you know you don’t want it?”
“Are you sure you went to business school and not law school?”
“Very sure,” he says, chuckling.
“You have an answer for everything. It’s annoying.”
“I aim to annoy you with my answers for a very long time to come, but only if that’s what you want, too. I have no desire to force myself on you, Gigi. And I mean that. If you tell me right now to go away, I will. I’ll hate it, but I’ll go.” He tilts his head. “You want me to go?”
Yes, go away so I don’t have to deal with any of this. The words burn the tip of her tongue, but she can’t make herself say something that will hurt him. “No, I don’t want you to go.”
They return to Gigi’s to take a nap. Jared invites them to dinner and tells Cooper they have a lead on finding Jessie.
Gigi drives in and parks next to the Porsche. “How’s it going, Jared?” she asks.
“About the same. Still looking for Jessie and taking care of the baby in the meantime.”
“I give you guys all the credit for what you’re doing.”
“We’re doing what anyone would.”
“That’s not true,” Gigi says, a fierce edge to her tone. “Most people would’ve turned the baby over to the system. You’re not most people.”
“Thanks,” Jared says with a weary sigh.
Gigi glances at Cooper.
“They invited us.”
“Shouldn’t we be making them dinner?”
“That’s what I said, too, but Jared said Lizzie wants to do it.”
“What can we bring?”
“Not a thing. I did a grocery run this morning and picked up wine. We’re all set.”
“Thanks for having us,” Cooper says.
“We’re looking forward to some adult time.”
“Sounds fun,” Cooper says.
“You guys have a nice afternoon. I’ll see you at dinner.”
Luke invites Oliver and Dara for dinner and to talk with Sydney about their shared experiences of loss.
On the drive over, Dara tells Oliver about her job at the Wayfarer and the off-season events she’ll work on, including community Thanksgiving, Christmas and New Year’s Eve parties for year-round residents.
“I’m happy to see you taking this on, Dar. I think it’ll be good for you.”
“I think so, too. Like you said, it’s a challenge, but nothing like what work used to be like. I’m not ready to go back to that life any time soon, so this feels perfect for now.”
“What if we decide we never want to leave this place? What if the Wayfarer turns out to be a job you love, and my day trading provides a sustainable income?”
“I guess then we’ll figure out how to make this a permanent move.”
“I’m glad to hear you say you might consider staying.
I feel more at home here in a few days than I have anywhere I’ve ever lived.
I love the morning meeting at the marina and the friendly people and the gorgeous scenery and the adventure of living on an isolated island.
I love it all.” He looks over at her. “But I only love it if you do, too.”
“I like it a lot. I feel like I can breathe here. Do I want to stay forever? I’m not sure yet, but I wouldn’t rule it out.”
“We probably ought to experience winter before we fall in love with the place, huh?”