56. Sable
SABLE
The music filters into my room, the same delicious melody I’ve been listening to for months now.
It calms me, a welcome rest after yesterday's twin shenanigans. God, leaving that library was the walk of shame to end them all. It was… I don’t even have words for the experience.
The twins force me to have far too many emotions, and I don’t even want to think about what Orion meant when he said he wanted to keep me forever.
The music continues, and I sigh, sinking into the bed. Orion told me he would let me participate in his classes yesterday when he left me in my room, but I’m not sure I believe him, and I don’t want to think about him any longer, as it only leaves me feeling more mixed up.
My eyes trace each door, and I wonder if it’s ambient noise, maybe someone streaming the same song again and again.
The notes never change. It must be one of the guys.
As far as I’ve come to understand, there is nothing on this floor but us.
I wonder if they have windows or what their rooms look like.
It’s strange to think we’ve done so much, but I’m only with each of them once a week.
They’re all living their own lives without me beyond these doors while I’m trapped in here.
So many things have happened that shifted my perception of them from monsters to humans, and that’s likely more dangerous than anything.
They’re not mythical beasts; they’re flawed human men with no shortage of issues, and now I feel for them.
The shift in our relationship is too raw.
I hate that they’ve all seen my weakness, but what I hate even more is that I’m starting to see the cracks in each one of their facades.
This is the kind of shit that makes you soft and ends with you falling in love.
I roll my eyes at myself, refusing to even entertain the idea.
I can’t feel anything for them, and definitely not love.
I don’t even trust them enough to be fully honest about how I wound up here.
My ears perk as the melody reaches a high note, and I stand, my fingertips touching every door, knowing that behind the dark stone and glowing symbols hides the truth. I still don’t know which door belongs to each, but as I’ve learned, Lex’s last name is Morwen, and the twins are Rook.
I put my ears against the first door, and hear nothing but perfect quiet.
M marks the door. Morwen, this is Lex’s.
The next door has noise behind it, but not this mournful music, R.
I suspect one of the twins, but I’m not sure which.
When I press my ear to V, hope blooms inside me.
The door lightly vibrates against my ear and someone’s voice reaches me as they hum along.
I tap with the back of my knuckles. A misplaced chord stops the song, and that’s when I realize someone is playing this music live.
Hadrian , I think to myself, remembering his violin performance in the stairwell.
Just as I decide it must be him, the door opens, revealing his handsome face.
His deep blue eyes meet my light ones, and his floppy hair hangs over his forehead.
His physique is leaner than the others, his veins more prominent.
He’s got broad shoulders, but fewer muscles than the guys who clearly spend their time working out.
He’s dressed in comfortable gray bottoms and a thin, sleeveless T-shirt with bare feet to finish it off. I don’t know why that feels so intimate, but I blush as my eyes drop to the floor.
“That was you playing?” I ask, needing him to validate he’s this talented with multiple instruments. That wasn’t a violin playing.
“You know it was.” His tone sounds irritated, and I wonder if the fact he’s playing it over again means he’s struggling with some aspect of it.
“That was beautiful.”
“It’s a mess.”
He’s full of shit, but rather than argue with him, my eyes drift over his shoulder to the room behind him.
I was just wondering what their lives looked like without me, and his is…
bare. Except for the grand piano over in the corner, his bed, and his violin in the stand, there isn’t much of anything, but a door sits open, revealing a long hall.
What the fuck? They have full apartments?
“I loved it,” I insist.
“Then come inside and be my audience. Maybe if I have a little pressure, I’ll nail it this time.” He steps out of the way and waves for me to follow.
“Is that allowed?” I ask, never having considered that one of them could simply bring me into their space.
Hadrian chuckles. “Do you care?”
No, I don’t, but part of me has come to fear the guys.
I shake my head and cross the threshold with a confident sway to my step. Despite the fact I’m in nothing but a skimpy nightgown, I act entirely prepared for a visit.
“It’s allowed,” he tells my back. It bothers me, and it shouldn’t. Who cares if none of them ever thought to invite me inside their lavish apartments?
My eyes are hungry and dart all over, memorizing every detail beyond the black door.
The hall leads to a fully equipped kitchen, and it doesn’t look like it ends there.
From outside the door, I couldn’t see his pile of textbooks, mugs, and empty cookie packages.
It’s weird to think of Hadrian as a sort of messy man who eats cookies, but the proof is there, I guess.
So far, I don’t see any windows, but I haven’t had a chance to explore.
“Sit down. We’re doing this until I get it right,” he says.
“You’re in a bad mood.”
“I don’t like messing up.”
“Sounds beautiful to me,” I say, waiting for him to play for me. I had no idea he was such a perfectionist, and it’s incredibly endearing. “Please, play,” I encourage him despite his sour attitude.
He sighs loudly as he takes his seat at the piano bench.
As I look over his hunched shoulders, it becomes immediately obvious to me just how stressed he is.
I can tell by the way his shoulders are stiff, and he sits at the piano bench with a frown over his brows.
My hands lace in front of my body, fighting the desire to touch him.
If I rubbed the knots out of his shoulders, would that calm him, and why the hell do I care?
I don’t know why I’m being so fucking awkward here.
Hadrian’s hands pick up across the keys, and despite the beauty of the music, I hear what he’s talking about.
He’s not on his top game tonight. The music may not be as perfect as normal, but it swells inside me, taking all the bad feelings and leaving something good behind.
I smile right until the end when I applaud once again.
“Don’t patronize me,” he says, putting his head in his hands.
“I’m really not.”
“And you suddenly know something about music?” He’s in a mood tonight, but instead of fighting with him, I touch the aching muscles in his neck. Despite himself, he relaxes a fraction, leaning into my touch.
“Dad put me in piano lessons,” I tell him. I know a thing or two.
“Really?” There’s laughter in his voice instead of tension, and I dig my fingers in deeper.
“Prove it.” He pats the bench beside him. “Come sit by me.”
I do just that, enjoying the fact he’s already several degrees warmer.
I pluck out the keys, nailing it, like I do everything.
Once I’m finished, I turn to him and arch my brow, expecting my praise.
Yet it’s not a round of applause I get. It’s a kiss.
Hadrian has never kissed me before until this very moment.
I wasn’t sure he ever planned to take advantage of this side of things.
His kiss is soft, and a gasp escapes my lips because I can’t remember ever being kissed this way.
But what starts exploring gets heated soon enough.
I open my mouth to him, and he sinks his fingers into my hair.
My back arches, nipples softly grazing his T-shirt, but Hadrian breaks the kiss.
His eyes search mine, and he finally says, “Very impressive.” But I don’t know if he means the kiss or the song I played.
“Play another song for me,” I say. “One you’re not so angry about.”
He nods, trying to seem annoyed rather than flustered, but that kiss was good. His fingers fly over the keys, and I watch fascinated. Even though I’m not versed in music, I know in my bones he has incredible skills if he can carry a composition like this. Once it’s done, I smile and clap.
Hadrian chuckles despite himself. “You don’t need to clap every time. It’s silly.”
“I like it when you play that much,” I say, lifting my shoulder. “What’s the name of that piece?” No sheet of music sits in front of us because he’s playing from memory. If that’s not impressive enough, he takes my breath away when he says, “It’s mine. I haven’t named it.”
My mouth falls open, and I shake my head. “That’s unbelievable. Are you going to send me away if I ask for more?”
His fingers touch the keys with a softness that I envy. “No. I’d play through the night if I could. And for a captivated audience? That’s a dream.”
“You can,” I whisper. “Unless you have a curfew.”
He doesn’t reply, but he smiles as he starts a new song. Another one that is just heartbreaking and haunting. My eyes try to follow every stroke of his fingers, as if I can memorize the notes and play it again for myself later when I’m all alone.
“Are you okay?”
He nods stiffly, his throat working on a lump.
Hadrian is always so quiet and reassuring.
He has that aura of someone who knows where he’s going, and seeing him out of sorts makes me want to be the one giving comfort.
I touch his cheek, and the start of a beard feels rough beneath my palm.
He falls into the touch and his eyes fan closed for a second until he opens them again, but his fingers never pause on the keys.
“What’s wrong?” I insist, even more worried than I was a moment before.
What is he so afraid of? Why is he acting like touching me is so difficult after that kiss? When the answer doesn’t come, I start feeling self-conscious. I remove my hand, blaming myself for once again offering touch to someone who doesn’t want me.
But he kissed me, right?
Hadrian captures my fingers with his, and I glance at his face, but he’s not looking at me, he’s watching our hands with that frown still in place.
“I’m not used to trusting anyone, Sable.”
“Do you want me to leave?” I ask even though it’s the last thing I want to do. In my head, I plead to stay. This place is much better than the barren walls I’ve been looking at for the past few months, and suddenly, Hadrian feels like a needed project.
“No. I like touching you.” And then he looks me in the eyes. “But you’re not usually awake when I do.”