Chapter 10
CHAPTER 10
brITTANY
B rittany woke suddenly, her vague dream of falling slamming her back into reality faster than her brain could compute. With a few blinks, she realized Gus was gone and her foot was now carefully propped up on a pillow with a Post-it Note stuck to it.
Grabbing food for dinner. Back later. Don’t move from this couch. I mean it.
She smiled at the bossy note, imagining his frown as he was writing it. A glance at the coffee table also showed her he had piled various snacks and drinks there for her to easily reach, along with the bottle of anti-inflammatories. Gus may be grouchy as fuck, but he was a hell of a nurse.
Brittany slipped his note into the pocket of her shorts with a wiggle and then gingerly attempted to stand. She had no desire to leave the condo while he was gone and race around the city, but the bathroom was calling her.
She gently tested to make sure her ankle would hold weight and then did a combination of a limp and a hop to the bathroom. After taking care of her business, Brittany washed her hands and got her first glimpse of herself since that morning.
She looked like hell.
Her mascara was smudged under her eyes, with one fake lash coming away from her eyelid in an attempt at freedom. Her lipstick was long gone, and her foundation and careful contouring only a memory, allowing her faint freckles to show through.
She pulled out her phone and took a quick mirror selfie to post on her social media. While she was a fashion person, Brittany believed in showing her followers the real side of her life, the less than perfect moments that made her human and reminded all of them that they were in this world together. Her mom hated when she did it, but Brittany didn’t care. She wanted to show the reality of herself as much as the online glam image.
She posted the photo just as she heard the front door to the condo open. Brittany yelled through the door.
“Don’t be mad. I had to use your bathroom. It couldn’t be helped. But I swear I’m going right back to the couch.”
She opened the door and limped her way out of the bathroom… only to come face-to-face with Robbie. The shocked look he was giving her would’ve been priceless if she wasn’t so certain it matched her own. It only took seconds for his expression to transform into the sneer she had become familiar with since they broke up.
“You sure don’t waste any time, do you?” His tone was dripping with judgment, which sent Brittany’s back up.
“You better watch your fucking tone, Robbie. Even with a bad ankle, I could still fuck you up.”
She was barefoot, her five-foot-four inches barely coming to his shoulder because the stupid Lozano genes were tall, but she stuck her finger right in his face, her glare a palpable source of fierce energy.
He just shook his head. “I should’ve known. What is it? You needed a place to stay for the convention, so you conned him into letting you shack up here? Bat those baby blues at him and let him touch you? You’re so fucking transparent, Brittany.”
“Don’t be disgusting. Your brother’s been a gentleman, and you’re acting like a jealous turd.”
“Why would I be jealous? I’m the one that’s moved on, remember.”
“Yeah, I heard. You ‘moved on’ before we even broke up.”
Brittany hadn’t meant to bring his infidelity up, but her temper often got away from her, and to tell the truth, she wasn’t sorry. From the way Robbie’s eyes narrowed into a glare, they were apparently going to have the fight they should’ve had months ago when Brittany had gotten a message from Devery, Min’s little sister. A message with a link to a social media page featuring a nutritionist and her latest boyfriend. That boyfriend? Robbie.
When Brittany did a deep dive into social media, she discovered Robbie had been cheating on her for months with several women, and she’d had no idea. Hell, there was actual photo evidence of it out in the world, photos that people all over had liked and shared and commented on while Brittany had blindly trusted him. Believed that he was as committed as she was.
“You left long before I did, Brittany.”
The memory of that moment, of clicking on the link from Dev and seeing exactly what Robbie had been doing behind her back, hit Brittany like a truck. And she abruptly decided she was done being the nice guy.
“Is that bullshit what you tell yourself to justify cheating on me?”
“Maybe I’m finally telling you the truth about our relationship, which you seem keen on ignoring.”
“That’s some real gaslighting bullshit you got going on there, Robbie. And it’s not going to work on me anymore, so how about trying an apology.”
“An apology? That’s rich coming from the girl who destroyed my hard drives.”
She got closer to him, not backing down.
“You mean my hard drives, Robbie. I bought them, all their registration was in my name, all their warranties and repairs. My hard drives.”
He rolled his eyes, crossing his arms in front of him in a classic defensive move.
“So, what? You pushed me into the arms of someone else, destroyed my work, and now you’re going to fuck my brother in revenge?”
Brittany barely had time to gasp at the accusation before they both jumped at the sound of a door slamming shut. Brittany turned too fast, forgetting her bad ankle and wincing when the pain shot up her leg. There, in the doorway with a bag of groceries and a scowl on his face, was Gus.
Robbie immediately rounded on him, too fired up to give a shit about how pissed Gus was.
“And you. ‘Nothing going on’ my ass. How soon after you told me that did you sleep with her? Unbelievable, Gus.”
Gus very carefully set down the groceries, placing his keys on the little hook by the door, and then turned to Robbie. His voice was quiet, especially in comparison to Robbie’s yelling, his tone so cold Brittany shivered.
“First of all, I could hear you both yelling down the hall. If you don’t have any respect for me, at least respect my neighbors and keep your voices down.”
Robbie opened his mouth to reply, probably some asinine remark, but Gus sliced a hand through the air in front of him. His expression was thunder, fierce and protective, and Brittany couldn’t take her eyes off of him.
But Gus only had eyes for Robbie.
“No. You’ve already said your piece, and it was some pretty horrible shit to say, Robbie. Nothing is going on between me and Brittany. She’s a job, which I told you about. She hurt her ankle and she’s hanging out here where I can keep an eye on her. For my job.”
Brittany wasn’t ready for how that statement stung. But Robbie just switched tactics, his voice lower as he leaned toward Gus, switching to supportive brother in a blink of a personality shift.
“She’s playing you, Gus. Don’t fall for this damsel routine. She’s using you to get revenge against me.”
Brittany snorted at that ridiculousness, leaning against the wall to take the weight off her ankle. Gus ignored her to focus on his brother.
“Why would she need revenge against you, Robbie?”
Gus asked the question in exactly the tone of a person who already knew the answer and was waiting for Robbie to fess up. And Robbie knew it. His face turned bright red.
“She pushed me away, Gus.”
“Did she push you away, or did you get bored like you always do?”
This was news to Brittany, but she didn’t want to interrupt for follow-up questions. Robbie was already shaking his head.
“It wasn’t like that.”
“Look, your relationships are none of my business. But when you look me in the eye and lie to my face like you did about your breakup, that makes me feel a certain kind of way. That makes me feel that I don’t mean a lot to you, and that I’m not worthy of hearing your truth, no matter how ugly. We’re brothers, man. I thought we were better than that.”
Robbie looked chagrined, and Brittany had to admire Gus’s ability to talk about things like this. She had never really known someone who could phrase hurt in a way that made it a tangible thing to talk through. She certainly could never talk to Kathleen like that. She’d get too mad and one of them would throw something.
“I’m sorry,” Robbie said. “I should have told you the truth. But she did push me away. I was never good enough for her, and she let me know it.”
“Stop lying, dipstick.”
Brittany was talking before she realized her mouth was moving, but she was too mad, so fuck it. If Gus kicked her out, he kicked her out. But she wasn’t going to listen to Robbie’s lies one more fucking moment.
“I was a hundred percent in, Robbie. But I was never a priority for you, and you made that abundantly clear, so clear that I feel like an idiot for not seeing it sooner. So don’t you blame me for you cheating. I won’t fucking stand it.”
Brittany could feel tears in her eyes, which surprised her. She hadn’t cried when Robbie had ended their relationship and certainly hadn’t cried when she found out he had been cheating. But here she was, in front of both Lozano brothers no less, with her eyes watering.
“You were the one who moved on without telling me,” she continued. “You were the one that violated my trust over and over again. You were the one who made it clear through your every action how little you respected me.”
Robbie had the grace to look ashamed, but he was still Robbie, which meant he wasn’t ready to give up being the victim. Instead, he focused on Gus.
“Is this because of Annabelle?”
Brittany perked up. Who was Annabelle?
Gus was shaking his head. “From what I’ve heard, this is a completely different situation.”
Robbie glared. “Fine. If that’s true, if you both are really just here because of his job, then promise me there’s nothing more.”
Gus rolled his eyes. “Robbie, there’s nothing more.”
“Promise me there won’t be.”
Gus went silent at that, and when Robbie swung his eyes to Brittany, she found herself instinctively looking at Gus. Their eyes met in this moment, memories of the elevator, of him holding her in the crowd at the convention center, of her hand in his, and an impossible feeling bubbled to the surface, a thought suddenly so clear that Brittany wondered how she hadn’t seen it before.
I can’t.
Shaking off that revelation, Brittany turned to Robbie.
“You lost the privilege of telling me what to do when you cheated on me. Feel free to go fuck yourself hard with a hammer.”
Betrayal and rage clouded Robbie’s expression.
“Just fucking great.” He stormed toward the door, getting close to Gus on his way out for one last blast of ire and sarcasm.
“Finally getting what you want, aren’t you, big brother?”
He was out the door, slamming it shut behind him before either of them could react. The sound echoed in the suddenly quiet condo, leaving them both in the awkward aftermath of the fight.
Gus recovered faster than she did, seeming to shake off the tension and turn to where she was standing.
“You need to get off that ankle.”
“It’s fine,” she said automatically.
“I can see you wincing from here. And you’re leaning against the wall to stay off it.”
He approached her, taking her arm to gently lead her back to the couch. He fussed over her ankle while she watched him, the gears in her head spinning.
“What did Robbie mean?” she finally asked, not being able to wait anymore. He didn’t look at her.
“He didn’t mean anything, he was just being Robbie.”
“Seemed pretty pointed at the end there.”
Gus finished with her ankle, finally happy with its position, then turned back to where he left the groceries. Clearly, he wasn’t going to answer her question, and she kinda realized that was for the best. She wasn’t certain she was ready to hear his answer. But she did feel Robbie had painted a picture of her she didn’t want Gus to believe.
“For the record, I wanted it to work with him,” she found herself confessing. “On paper, he was everything I was looking for. For a while, I thought he was the one.”
“What changed for you?”
He still wasn’t looking at her, instead focusing on slicing up vegetables and other surprises for dinner, but Brittany knew without a doubt she had his full attention. That’s how Gus was—he listened.
“Min met Hayden.”
The memories from last year flooded back, all the horrible things Min went through. But also her connection with Hayden, how quickly and utterly they had fallen for each other. After the tournament, Brittany watched Min become even more confident, more sure of herself with Hayden in her corner, their connection deep and real and unbreakable.
And Brittany had realized she wanted that. Pretty badly, if she was being honest. And that person, the one who would have her back and build her confidence, who she would love unconditionally through thick and thin… wasn’t Robbie.
“They were it for each other,” is what she told Gus. “And something in watching them fight tooth and nail to be together made me realize I wanted that. Maybe it’s dumb, because I don’t think everyone gets a love like that. But still. I wanted to try.”
He paused in his chopping, finally looking up to where she was on the couch, and the burning in his eyes took Brittany’s breath away.
“It’s not dumb. You’re intelligent and beautiful and caring and you deserve a man who’s going to worship you. You deserve a man who’s willing to earn you. And if that’s not Robbie, then fuck him.”
He went back to cooking while Brittany tried to remember a time when her heart wasn’t beating like it was about to be a medical emergency. Because the way Gus had just said that…
Looking for a distraction, she glanced down at the floor near the kitchen and frowned.
“Is that my suitcase?”
“I stopped at your hotel room. You’re staying here for the rest of Kickoff.”
Her mouth dropped open, her mind racing with reasons this was a terrible idea.
“Gus, you don’t have a guest room.”
“You’ll stay in my room. It’s not a big deal.”
Not a big deal? To stay in his room, in his bed, that’s going to smell like him and be full of his things? Is he out of his mind?
“I can’t take your bed.”
“It’s already settled. I’ll couch it. Now be quiet, I’m trying to cook.”
He turned his back on her to face the stove, effectively ending the conversation, and she was left floored with what the last hour had brought her, her mind racing as it tried to process her fight with Robbie and the new dynamic she had somehow slipped into with Gus.
Dinner was a quiet affair, both of them ignoring the small dining table and eating on the couch, watching Brittany’s dating show that even she had to admit was dumb. She finished the last bite of the grilled salmon with vegetables he’d made, setting down her plate on the coffee table and then flopping down on the groan, a hand gripping her stomach.
“Too much. I’ve eaten too much. How could you do this to me?”
Gus chuckled softly, a sound that reverberated down Brittany’s spine. He was also lying back on the couch, reclining, her feet once again in his lap to keep the bad ankle elevated. And Brittany realized that, even with the horrible confrontation with Robbie earlier, even with all the questions she had in the aftermath, she was having a really, really good time.
Which meant it was time to leave. She didn’t want to get between brothers, even if Robbie was an idiot and Gus saw her as a job. While angry Brittany would seek revenge for some of the garbage Robbie had spewed out of his mouth today, well-fed and tired Brittany wasn’t willing to do anything to ruin this moment with Gus.
“Look, I appreciate everything,” she said softly, feeling a small zing of electricity as his eyes turned to meet hers. “But I should really go back to my hotel. Me staying here is only going to piss off Robbie more, and while I delight in it, it’s unfair for you to be caught between us and our drama.”
He never took his eyes from her face.
“You can’t even walk to the bedroom by yourself on that ankle. You’re currently a vulnerable target for this guy who’s been after you, and with him ramping up his actions, it doesn’t make sense for you to stay at that hotel. You have five roommates who are constantly throwing parties and making out with strangers in that room. Hell, the person who let me in barely blinked when I showed up to get your stuff. Your stalker could get in there, easy, and you’d have no defense and nowhere to hide. So no, you’re not leaving. You’re staying right here.”
Damn, those were really good, logical points and Brittany would be an idiot not to listen. And from the half-smile on his face, he knew he had her. Still, she huffed, crossing her arms.
“Fine. You win. No hotel room.”
Instead of gloating, Gus just nodded and turned his attention back to the dating show that he must hate but was still watching because it was what she wanted to watch.
“Who’s Annabelle?”
The question was out before she could stop it. She knew it wasn’t her place to pry, but she was so curious. Robbie had said the name before like she was someone important, but Brittany, for the life of her, couldn’t remember ever meeting an Annabelle. Gus froze in taking a drink of his water, clearly unsure what to say, and Brittany immediately felt horrible. His dating life was none of her business.
“Don’t answer that, I’m being nosey.”
Gus sighed, staying quiet, and Brittany assumed he wasn’t going to answer her. And then he spoke, his eyes still on the TV.
“It was a few years ago. I met Annabelle on vacation. I was up the coast in Big Sur, surfing, and she was at the beach with her friends. She called me over and asked me to take their picture. When I went to hand her phone back, she told me to put my number in it first.”
Brittany couldn’t help but think Annabelle was seeming like a smart, logical woman when faced with what must have been Gus’s shirtless, wet body. She had to shoot her shot, and Brittany respected it.
Gus continued. “I called her that night, and we went out a few times. She was fun. Always taking pictures and posting on her social media, but I’m used to that with Robbie and didn’t think anything of it. She never asked to take pictures with me or to post them.”
“Were you guys serious?”
Gus shrugged. “Serious enough, I guess. I took her to meet my mom.”
Brittany’s eyes widened. Gus’s mom was a force of nature, loud and overwhelming and judgmental in all the best ways. Brittany adored her.
“What did Mama Lozano think?”
“She said she was reserving her judgment.”
Brittany winced. Mama Lozano was proud of how easily she could read people and had declared Brittany a keeper within an hour of meeting her. If she had spent time with Annabelle and not loved her… it didn’t look good.
“The problem was more what Robbie thought of her. Or rather, what she thought of Robbie. They spent that night huddled up comparing follower counts and evaluating each other’s streams.”
Brittany’s jaw dropped. “While your mom was there?”
Gus nodded. “After that, we were hanging with Robbie more and more, and I realized I was feeling like the third wheel in my own relationship. I talked with her about it, and she admitted she didn’t really like hanging out with me. I wasn’t ‘fun’ when we were together. And she wasn’t really interested in our relationship moving forward. We broke it off. And then a few days later, she and Robbie started dating.”
Brittany couldn’t help herself, struggling to sit up so she could see Gus’s face more clearly. His tone of voice said he was over it, but there was something in the hard set of his jaw, the glint of his eyes, that said it hurt him. And after the conversation she had just heard between him and Robbie…
Finally upright, she leaned toward him, putting her hand on his arm.
“Gus, you know that’s complete horseshit, right? What she told you, that has more to do with what a shitty person she is rather than how ‘fun’ you are.”
He shrugged, not meeting Brittany’s eyes.
“It had to partly be about me, considering we were at the height of our relationship, and she found it very easy to throw me away.”
Gus said it lightly, but there was no way he felt it lightly. Brittany couldn’t help herself, and before she knew it, she was pulling Gus toward her, wrapping her arms around his neck in a hug that was tight and firm. She turned her head to his ear.
“You’re not easy to throw away, Gus. You’re the one worth keeping. And sometimes, you meet and connect with someone who is wholly not ready for what you have to offer, and they panic. But that’s on them, not you. If she couldn’t see how superior you are to Robbie in every way, then she doesn’t fucking deserve you.”
His hair was soft as she pressed her face into his neck. She inhaled, not bothering to think about how weird it probably was, taking in his scent of laundry detergent and a hint of his woodsy aftershave. Brittany felt his arms go around her, pulling her even closer.
Finally, she gave him one last squeeze and pulled away just enough to look him in the eyes. They stared at each other, neither breathing, the air uncertain and able to tip in any direction. Even Brittany could feel the unpredictability in the moment.
Gus raised a hand and tucked a stray blonde lock behind her ear, his eyes locked on hers in concentration, and Brittany could feel them on the verge of something new, something she wasn’t sure she was prepared for but that she secretly, desperately wanted.
And then Gus pulled away. “Let me make up the bed for you. Give me a few minutes.”
Just like that, they were back in platonic friend territory. Or in client/bodyguard territory. It was hard for Brittany to tell exactly how Gus cataloged her, but she knew she was disappointed.
She let him go, shimmying back to her side of the couch, reaching for a light tone of voice she definitely didn’t feel.
“I’m fine on the couch. You can sleep in your bed.”
“You’re taking the bed, killer. I’m done talking about it.”
To emphasize his point, he strode into the bedroom, and Brittany took the time to center herself. Sure, they’d had a heart-to-heart about Gus’s dating and trauma and what a shithead Robbie was. Sure, they had just had a moment where Brittany absolutely thought Gus was going to kiss her, had even, for a brief second, wanted him to kiss her.
And Gus had made it clear he wasn’t interested in her that way.
Fine, she was a big girl. This wasn’t the first time a guy Brittany liked wasn’t into her, and it probably wouldn’t be the last. And, really, it was for the best, considering how messy everything already was just with him acting as her bodyguard.
Brittany managed to psych herself up to being friendly and professional when he walked back in and held out a hand to her.
“C’mon, let’s get you to bed.”
Her stomach fluttered at the words, and she thanked the stars she wasn’t a blusher because otherwise she would be flaming right now. She grabbed his hand and let him pull her up, stumbling a little into him as her ankle screamed a reminder that it wasn’t up for any walking around. She braced herself with a hand on his chest, then quickly snatched it away.
“Sorry.”
Gus didn’t say anything, just helped her to the room, then went and grabbed her bag and dropped it near the bed. He had turned down the covers already to make it easy to climb into, and it was so inviting she wanted to collapse into it immediately and sleep for days.
“I’ll be out here if you need anything.”
He turned to leave and Brittany called out to stop him.
“Gus?”
He paused at the door, turning back to her, looking so handsome it took her breath away..
“Thank you. For everything. Really.”
He nodded, then ducked out the door, quietly shutting it behind him. Brittany sat on the bed, staring at her bag on the floor, completely thrown by everything that had just happened.
“Fuck.”
With a deep breath, she managed to change into her pajamas and do her nightly skincare routine, gratefully sinking into the bed with the soft sheets and the perfect pillows. And while she was laying there, drifting into Gus’s smell, the feel of his sheets on her skin, the memory of him so close to her, his arms around her, hell, the elevator with his hardness pressed into her, she realized that, as tired as she was, she wasn’t going to be able to sleep unless she did something about this.
Brittany rolled to her back. Her mind wandered to Gus. His eyes, his smile, his hard jaw. The way the dark curl fell onto his forehead, making him look like a real Clark Kent. She thought of how tall he was, and how strong, how he carried her through the convention center on his back and didn’t even seem to be out of breath.
And as she let her hand wander down her stomach, lightly stroking herself through her silky shorts and the light cotton underwear she was sporting, she let her imagination focus on how different tonight could’ve ended. How easy it would’ve been in the elevator for him to unzip himself. Her hand could’ve moved behind her, finding him hard and long and ready. His palm could’ve moved slowly under her skirt, feeling how wet she already was for him, and she could’ve guided him inside her. He would’ve entered her in one stroke, enough to make her gasp but not enough to draw attention to them, thrusting in micro movements that wouldn’t be enough to finish her, but would be just what she needed to edge.
Brittany bit her lip, trying not to moan as she thought of Gus’s heat surrounding her, his voice in her ear teasing her, asking if she wanted to come, telling her she had to wait wait wait, imagining his hand was the one moving on her clit in tight, fast circles, his fingers the ones plunging into her in that steady rhythm designed to drive her insane, and suddenly Brittany was coming, shuddering with her climax, letting her fingers feel her own body clench against them as even then she imagined they were Gus’s.
She opened her eyes, blinking at the ceiling above her, her fingers slipping out of her body, and she tried not to think about how she just orgasmed from imagining her ex’s brother.