20. Chapter Twenty
Chapter Twenty
Nate
It was another one of those nights where sleep was so far out in the ether it seemed like it would never be within my grasp again. I’d lost track of time, so when Samantha let herself into my apartment, my pulse kicked a surprised beat, and I swiveled from my computer to face her.
“Hey.” She sauntered over to where I was sitting at the kitchen island and leaned her elbow on the counter beside me, smiling. “Are you waiting on nachos?”
Despite myself, I smiled back. She had that effect on me. “To be completely honest, I didn’t realize how late it had gotten. But if you’re offering, then yeah, I’d love to share some nachos with you.”
I wasn’t particularly hungry, but now that she was here, I wasn’t ready to lose her to sleep. And watching her move freely around my kitchen, like she’d made herself at home, was soothing.
Over her shoulder, she asked, “Did Kelly give you much trouble?”
“She did a lot of talking.”
Samantha raised a brow. “About lunch with our mom?”
“Yeah. She gave me the rundown.”
She shuddered. “It wasn’t the most pleasant afternoon. Kelly got a taste of our mom’s bitter side. I think she had an epiphany.”
I chuffed. “She mentioned something about that. Realizing this is how your mom’s always been with you. I don’t think she’s very happy with herself for never noticing.”
Though I found it incredibly difficult to believe she’d shared a home with Samantha and hadn’t noticed how god-awful Marla was. It had taken me all of thirty seconds to see it. I would’ve said she’d never cared before today, when it had affected her too.
I guess it was marginally better late than never.
Samantha bustled around the kitchen, her black skirt shifting higher on her thighs with every step. “Sorry you ended up being Kelly’s sounding board.”
I lifted my eyes from her legs. “It wasn’t all bad. She doesn’t expect me to do more than nod along. It’s almost like listening to a podcast.”
That made her laugh. “God, what a day. And what a situation we’ve found ourselves in. A month ago, you and I were nothing more than two ships passing in the night. Now, I’ve practically moved in with you while bringing along my estranged sister who’s decided we’re buddies.”
“What a day,” I echoed. “I visited Louise after work.”
I hadn’t shared this with my brothers, but with Samantha, it spilled out of me without any prompting.
“Really?” She brought our nachos over and perched on the stool beside me, turning so her legs slotted between mine. “What was that like?”
“She’s dying. That’s clear from looking at her. I don’t know how I feel about it.”
“I get that. It’s okay to be conflicted. Even makes sense. If my mom were dying, I would be too.”
We were quiet for a few minutes, eating our nachos with our legs tangled.
I found I wanted to talk to her about Louise, but I didn’t know where to start.
My thoughts were so mixed up. What I felt was buried so deep under a layer of neutrality—I didn’t know how to access it.
I was aware it was there, like a lump in the sand, but I couldn’t get to it.
I was most aware of the warmth of Samantha’s knee pressed to mine. The taste of melted cheese and sour cream on my tongue. Her low hums of delight. The ease of her presence. My growing arousal when her leg moved against mine.
Physical was easy. Everything else was difficult for me to access. But maybe that didn’t matter right now. I understood this particular need and knew exactly what to do with it.
We shut down the kitchen and retreated to my bedroom. Standing side by side in the bathroom, we brushed our teeth together. She smirked at my pajamas, and I laughed. It was impossible not to.
I tapped my toothbrush on the sink, returned it to its rightful spot, and moved behind her.
She straightened, meeting my gaze in the mirror. I stepped close, just shy of touching her, giving her the choice of where to take this.
Her back arched enough to put us in contact, and I reached up, brushing her hair away from her neck, then brought my mouth to her ear.
“I would really like to fuck you again, Samantha.”
Her breath hitched, and she nodded. “Yes. Let’s do that.”
Blood surged to my cock, leaving me lightheaded—empty of all thoughts except my need to lose myself inside her and let it all fade.
I slid my hands over her hips and around her stomach, pulling her against my erection.
She gasped, rocking into me, and raised her hands over her head to latch onto the back of my neck.
We watched through the mirror as my hand dipped beneath her boxers, finding her bare. She spread her legs, letting me in.
I took my eyes off hers to bury my face in her neck as I rolled her clit with the pad of my finger.
Her skin was smooth and smelled like a mix of lavender, soap, and a little bit of sex.
I mouthed along the column of her throat, suckling over her thrumming pulse.
Her moans vibrated my lips, and her head fell back on my shoulder, opening her throat to me.
I dug my teeth in her collarbone, and her pussy slickened under my fingers. She arched, and I pressed forward, wedging my cock between her cheeks. She turned her head and dragged her lips along my jaw as her fingers tangled in the back of my hair, tugging and grasping.
“Fuck,” I murmured. “You’re out of this world.”
“I’m ready.”
“Here?”
“Anywhere.”
Once again, I found her eyes, and she found mine. Then I yanked her boxers down and freed myself from my pants, my cock thumping against her lower back. She tugged off her T-shirt and dropped her hands to brace them on the counter, bending forward, almost presenting herself for me.
I took her cheeks in my hands, opening her up. Dragging them from front to back, spreading her arousal all over. I stopped on her back hole, toying with it, and she moaned, letting me know she liked that too.
“Maybe one day.” I fisted her hair in my hand, keeping her neck arched so I could see the reflection of her face. “I don’t have the patience to take my time right now.”
She wiggled her hips, drawing me closer. “Fuck me then. Please, like you said.”
My cock nudged her entrance, and her heat stopped me, making me draw back. “Condom.”
We hadn’t talked about it last time, but we should have. Two of my brothers had had unexpected pregnancies with their partners, and I wasn’t in any place to become the third.
She sucked in a breath. “I’m okay without one if you are. I have an IUD, and I get tested regularly.”
It took me all of two heartbeats to agree. “Yeah. I’m okay with that.”
One more heartbeat and I was sliding home. I held on to her hips and drove into her in one powerful push.
Her hands slipped on the marble, but I had her, keeping our bodies together with my grip on her waist. I gave her a moment to steady while I tried to gain some semblance of control.
“I won’t go easy,” I warned.
“Please don’t. I don’t want easy.”
And that was that. An unleashing of everything inside me I could not name. Permission to give it all to her in the way I desperately needed. I had no desire to hurt her. I wanted to bring us both to the brink so we’d remember this and feel it long after it was over.
Our skin slapped, echoing off the tile walls. Moans joined, deep and high, mingling. Samantha’s nails scrabbled on the smooth counter, and a flush climbed up her neck and cheeks.
When her head started to fall, I let go of one hip to cup her throat, tilting her head back. “Keep looking at me. I have to see your eyes.”
“Yes,” she sighed. “I’ll try.”
I gave her throat a tentative squeeze, and her inner walls clenched around me. “Good?”
“Mmm.” Her lids lowered to half-mast, but she kept her gaze locked on me. “More.”
“You’re going to get everything you ask for, Samantha.” My eyes dropped, watching as I disappeared into her. “You should see what I see. All spread open for me, taking me so well.”
“You like how I look with you inside me?”
“Can’t remember ever seeing anything better.”
I watched us come together and slide apart for as long as I could stand it before I needed her face again.
Her eyes were already on me, lips parted so huffs of breath could escape each time we collided.
She was so damn tight, it was a struggle to reach her end, to retreat, to not lose it before I was ready.
“Touch yourself,” I said.
Her arm moved, fitting between her legs. Her fingers found me first, feeling where we were joined. She rubbed my base then made a V with her fingers for me to pass through. And damn, did it make everything so much worse.
“Samantha, it’s time to listen,” I gritted out. “Fingers on your clit. Your turn to come. Not mine. Not yet.”
“Okay,” she agreed, letting me go. “I’m listening.”
Her hand slid up, moving in a circular pattern. “Yes, you are. Feels good, doesn’t it?”
“Mmmhmm. Do you like it?”
“Oh yeah.” I slammed into her, bracing my arm around the front of her shoulders so she stayed where I wanted her. “Amazing. Keep touching yourself. Get yourself so wet you’re dripping all over me.”
“Okay,” she breathed. “I can do that.”
“I know you can. You can do anything.”
I stopped talking. She didn’t need me to tell her anything else. She was doing everything I could have possibly dreamed of wanting. Her inner walls were soaked, clamping down hard as I rode her even harder.
I couldn’t decide whether to keep watching her face in the mirror or her body taking mine. Her back was a piece of art, long and graceful, made of curved and straight lines, covered in smooth, creamy skin and a fine mist of sweat.
I leaned over her, pressing my face into the side of her neck, banding both arms around her. She moaned and turned her head, her breath against my jaw.
A handful of strokes, my teeth latched into her skin, our bodies aligning, my weight holding her in place, and she began shaking in my arms. Her inner walls fluttered, then clamped, and heat flooded my cock.
Her orgasm was a rush of breath, of moans, of relief.
I made myself keep my eyes open so I could see every second of it, holding on to my control with the tips of my fingers.
When her body slackened, mine snapped. Pressing into her as far as I could, I erupted, letting go of her skin so I could groan loud enough to shake the walls. Her hands clasped mine, and she threaded our fingers, holding me through it.
I stumbled, my knees weak, and Samantha came with me. By sheer luck, we landed on the solid edge of the tub, her on my lap, my cock still firmly planted to the root. She leaned against me, limp as a rag doll, and I collapsed against the tile wall, stroking her belly as she caught her breath.
Her head rolled to the side on my shoulder, and she smiled up at me with glazed, lazy eyes.
I pressed my smile to hers, and it turned into a slow, sleepy kiss.
She reached up to cup my jaw, pulling me closer.
Little by little, I softened inside her until I slipped free, but we kept kissing.
Small, soft pecks. Deeper, open-mouthed kisses.
Finally, Samantha sighed and rubbed her nose against my cheek. “You have to be tired now.”
I breathed a laugh. “Being tired has never been the problem.”
But I got the message. I helped her to her feet, grabbed my pants, and left her in the bathroom to clean up. When she joined me in bed a couple minutes later, my head was sinking into my pillow.
“You okay?”
She rolled onto her side to face me, her face nothing more than shadows in the dark. “I’m great. You?”
“Mmm.” I didn’t consider my state very often unless I sensed myself on a downswing. Taking a beat, I assessed my body and mind—the looseness in my joints, the quiet inside my skull, the droop of my eyes. Satisfied was what I was. Completely, utterly satisfied. “Really great.”
“Good.” She swiped her hand over my shoulder. “And don’t worry, I told Ade about us sleeping together, so it’s not some big secret or anything.”
“I—” Was surprised. To tell the truth, I’d never intended for Adrian to find out. “He didn’t care?”
“No, not really. He knows it’s just…you know, sex.”
“Ah. Right.” I rubbed the center of my forehead, trying to decide how I felt about all this. “Will you tell him about tonight?”
She sighed. “If it comes up, sure, but I don’t see why it would.”
“So it’s not a secret, but you’re not volunteering the information.”
“Exactly.” She yawned. “You can tell him anything you want, though. I’d rather not put him in the middle of anything, but…”
“No, I get it. And I don’t think I feel the need to talk to him about what we do in private. Oversharing has never been my thing.”
“Glad we have that covered.” She slid across the mattress, and I opened my arm automatically, inviting her in. Her head settled on my shoulder, legs draped over mine. “Good night, Nate. Sweet dreams.”
I stopped myself from turning and kissing the top of her head. “Good night, Samantha.”
Sleep didn’t come easy. It never did.
But the wait wasn’t so bad.