Chapter Twelve
Skye
Ineeded to go.
It was the first thing that popped into my head when I woke up later that morning. Sex with Aaron had been amazing.
The dirty talk?
A fun surprise.
Multiple orgasms?
Not something I was used to.
But I couldn’t kid myself about what this was.
He didn’t pick me…he gave in.
This wasn’t a grand gesture of our feelings, it was a temporary weakness on his part. A betrayal of his friendship with my brother that he would likely regret even if Cliff never found out.
I was getting too close. Feeling too much. It would be a mistake to stay longer and make the heartbreak hurt that much more. Not that I loved the guy, but I saw how our lives could fit together even though we were so different.
We had a lot in common too, but nothing erased his friendship with Cliff. Or what he thought he had to do to keep it.
I extricated myself from under Aaron’s arm where he was still sleeping and started collecting my things.
It wouldn’t take long. Most of the things I’d rescued from my cabin I’d put back in my van.
All I needed was the clothes from last night and a few of Kyle’s things.
I piled everything by the door, tiptoeing on the creaky floor, then looked around for my cat.
Aaron was laying on his side and Kyle was laying behind him.
The two were back to back, both sleeping with an arm extended above their heads.
I could have laughed or maybe cried at the sight. It was adorable and heartbreaking at the same time. Poor Kyle had gotten attached to Aaron and now we were leaving.
I guess I had done the same thing.
I grabbed my camera from my pile of stuff and snapped one picture of the two before I scooped up Kyle. He made an affronted “hrmmph” noise, then yawned widely as I held him to my chest.
The door squeaked as I pushed it open, then the cool morning air washed over me.
If I was in a more poetic mood, I would think of it as starting over after a trip that had gone sideways, but I wasn’t in the headspace for that right now.
All I knew was that I’d had fantastic sex with a man I genuinely liked last night and now I was walking away.
“Not leaving without saying goodbye, are you?”
I jumped at the sound of Aaron’s voice.
“I was going to leave a note.” I turned around and my eyes landed on all that bare skin. He was only wearing a pair of boxer shorts. I’d had my hands all over him last night, but now I tucked them safely in my pockets.
He nodded and glanced toward my van. Kyle was sitting on the dashboard and Aaron frowned. “I’m actually going to miss the little menace.”
“And what about me?”
His blue eyes lifted. “After last night, I didn’t expect to find you sneaking out.”
A chilly breeze blew from off the lake and I crossed my arms over my chest. “Last night didn’t change anything.”
He winced. “That’s not—”
I held up a hand. “Let’s not do this, okay? If I was anyone except your best friend’s sister, we would be having another conversation, but I’m not, and so, we’re not. I should just go before things get complicated.”
His shoulders dropped and his lips pulled into a thin line. “Things are already complicated. For me, anyway.” He took a few steps back, then turned and walked back into his cabin.
A meow sounded from behind me, but I froze for a moment, indecision eating at me. Ultimately, I turned, my sandals crunching over the sand, got in my van, and started the ignition. I had what I needed for my article. I needed to move on.
The drive away from the lake felt heavier than it should have.
Kyle paced across the dashboard for the first twenty minutes, flicking his tail and meowing at me. Clearly, he was picking up on my mood.
“You’re being dramatic,” I told him, tightening my grip on the steering wheel. “We do this all the time.”
I had a whole summer of places to go planned. Places that I’d picked and was excited about going to. No fixed address, no tight schedule and no waking up tangled in a man’s sheets wishing I could just stay in bed.
I loved my life. It was just feeling a little lonelier when I’d gotten used to company.
His company specifically.
The next destination I had in mind was a three-hour drive away. I’d left early enough that a bit of fog still clung to the trees beside the mountain road.
The quiet was usually one of my favorite parts. Just the hum of my tires. I could plan out what to say in my article or next post. Today I just couldn’t focus.
At the next gas station, I filled the tank, grabbed coffee, and let Kyle stalk around the van on his leash while I checked my emails from my phone. I had an unread message from the magazine that had hired me asking for the draft of my article.
I had it finished. I had two versions, actually.
I wouldn’t mention Aaron by name in either version.
But one I had mostly written before he’d arrived and the second version I’d written after Aaron and I’s hike.
If I didn’t include the way I’d felt about the place with him there it was like losing the authenticity I included in my writing.
But adding his presence to the story was hard to do without injecting too revealing emotions into my words.
I hadn’t decided how to handle that yet, but I’d have to today.
Life went on.
I found a roadside stop an hour later and parked, pulling out my laptop.
Kyle immediately curled himself into my lap, making productive typing nearly impossible.
“You’re clingy today,” I said.
He blinked, but didn’t stop head butting my fingers.
I uploaded the last of the photos from the trip, confirming which ones I wanted for the article.
Then, once I couldn’t push it off anymore, I re-read the articles I’d written.
One was more informational about the place and what it included.
One was more poetic, conceptual maybe. It was about how I felt on the trip, not just an itinerary and a list of amenities.
There was only one article that matched who I was, as a woman and as a writer. Only one version that really matched the expectations I’d set for myself and promised to the magazine.
I attached the post-Aaron article and hit send.
My chest tightened hard enough that I leaned back in my seat.
It was ridiculous. We’d spent what? A handful of days together? One reckless night?
I closed the laptop a little too quickly and stared through the windshield at the open road ahead.
I’d seen a lot of things in my rearview mirror but he had to be the hardest one to drive away from.