41 #3
His apology sounds even more fake than before. He turns on his heel and leaves the room.
I force my dizziness aside and stand up with difficulty.
I’m all tangled up in wires, but I unplug them, one by one, and it makes the dizziness worse.
But I don’t care. I stumble toward the door.
Somehow, I make it, grabbing onto the handle and whipping the door open.
I reach the hallway, gasping from the way the stale air of the hospital seems to be pushing down on my chest.
Aurora. Aurora. Aurora.
I can’t lose her. Not on top of Lia. I just can’t let the family take her. I’ll never allow her to grow up in their midst. Anything would be better than that.
“Logan.”
“Fuck!”
I stagger back, nearly falling from the surprise of crashing into Damien. He’s just turned a corner and was making a beeline for my room, looking just as pale as I feel.
“Logan, are you okay?”
“Doesn’t matter if I am,” I groan. “I’d rather be dead. My life is over.”
For once, he doesn’t fall back into his usual sarcasm. He just looks at me seriously. “The Morettis will be here in twenty minutes…
“Fuck! Twenty minutes!” I’m beside myself with panic. “Cabello said an hour…”
“Cabello is a real bastard. I’m going to kill him.”
“Damien, stop. Stop with the jokes. I have to get to her… To Aurora…”
He puts an arm on my forearm. “I know, Logan. We have exactly nineteen minutes to make things right. It’s going to be okay. Vale and Igor are coming. Vale has an automatic, and Igor a machete.”
“The fuck… a machete…” I squeeze my eyes shut, trying to wrap my head around those words. “What the fuck is he going to do with a machete?”
“What the fuck do you think? Igor’s not a fan of guns. He prefers to gut people. Watch the blade sink into the bone, you know.”
“Damien.” I push him off me. “Damien, I don’t fucking care. You’re talking to me about machetes, but the Morettis will be here in nineteen minutes—”
“Eighteen minutes now. And Coltello is also on his way.”
“What the…”
“You know that gun you fired into him? Blanks. The fucker knew you were going to shoot him. He emptied out your gun while you were skipping along in the forest.”
“Damien!” I nearly sink to my knees, overcome by anguish and panic. “I need to get to Aurora. Just shut the fuck up.”
“That’s what I’m trying to tell you.” He props me up, staring into my eyes. “There’s going to be bloodshed. A full-out war. And they’ve drugged us. Cabello has been fucking drugging us. Keeping us unconscious.”
“What? Why would he do that?”
“I don’t know. Probably hoping we’d be out cold when the Morettis and Coltello came to finish their work. Fucking cowards. They’re coming for Aurora, Logan.”
“Oh, fuck…”
“And they’re coming to kill us too. You know the probability of the three of us drugged-up idiots surviving the next thirty minutes? It should be zero.”
I shake my head helplessly. I don’t care about dying, but if I’m dead, who will protect Aurora? She’s suddenly become my sole reason for living. My only glimmer of light in the darkness I’ve been plunged in.
“But it’s ten percent,” continues Damien, “because it’s us they’re fighting against, and we’re fucking rabid dogs, aren’t we, man? But that still puts them at 90% odds. We’re fucked, Logan. But we’re not gonna go down without a fight.”
“Damien, I’ve got to get to Aurora. I’ve got to save her.”
His arms reach around me, locking me to him. I can’t remember the last time I hugged him. But fuck, it feels good. Grounding. The panic, the pain, ebb just a bit, and I can think.
“You’re gonna need to give her up, man.”
“No!” I jump back. “Never, Damien. I’ll never let them take her.”
“I know.” He squeezes my shoulder. “I didn’t mean give her up to them, Logan.
You’re gonna need to give her up to someone who’s not about to die in a gang war.
She deserves a happy life. Hand her to someone who can look after her.
Who can love her. Who can bring her up normally. That’s what Lia would want.”
I turn away, a lump in my throat. I can’t even wrap my head around the thought of giving Aurora up, but I know it’s the only thing that makes sense. I’m about to die, and even if by some miracle I survive, I’ll never be safe. And Aurora can never be safe with me.
A ninety percent chance of dying… how can I possibly take that gamble and keep her with me?
Still, it’s the hardest thing in the world to whisper, “Okay.”
“Okay?” He looks at me, his eyes studying me carefully. “You’re gonna do it?”
I nod. “Yes. I’m going to… I’m going to find a loving family for her. She deserves it. It’s what Lia would want.”
Every word that leaves my mouth kills me.
“Okay, Logan. It’s the right decision.” Damien looks down at his watch. “You have… fifteen minutes.”