CHAPTER TWENTY-THREE
Lance glanced up as Franks walked into the hospital room. He smiled as he took the chocolate shake that Franks handed to him. "Thanks."
"Thought you could use something sweet." Franks took a seat in the chair near the window.
"You smell like cigarette smoke." Lance took a pull on the straw, closing his eyes at the flavor.
"I know. I'm struggling. This…" He waved his hand toward Angus. "…Has been a bit much to deal with."
"Don't have to tell me. I can't tell you how many times I've debated on having Jackson bring me in a bottle of something to numb the emotions.
" Lance stared at Angus's still body. "But I can't do that.
Angus would never forgive me for not keeping it together.
I'm not going to bitch at you for smoking a few cigarettes if it helps keep your head clear. "
"Thanks. I'm doing enough self-degradation for both of us. It won't become a habit again, I swear it won't." Franks sighed. "He'll make me quit again once he wakes up. He hates the smell of it on me in the car when we're working together."
Lance laughed. "Yeah, he does. Still, there are worse things you could be doing to deal with all of this. Trust me, I've considered many of them."
"How are you holding up?"
Lance shrugged. "It changes moment to moment.
Mostly, I keep telling myself I have to keep it together because I need to be here for him once he wakes up.
I'm not about to risk going off on a bender just to have him wake up while I'm sleeping it off.
Once he's home safe, then I might ask Lizzy for a joint and spend a night drinking. "
Franks nodded. "And I might just join you for that."
They sat in silence for a few minutes, both enjoying their shakes as they watched Angus.
It was a peaceful silence. One that Lance was thankful for.
He was tired of everyone asking how he was doing.
Tired of everyone trying to get him to go home for a night.
He was where he wanted to be. Where he needed to be.
"Did you get your shooter?" Lance asked.
Franks nodded. "The son admitted to everything. Was upset his parents were going to divorce. Such a waste. Two dead, a young man going to prison, and two young girls who will be stuck growing up with this hanging over their head. Sometimes I just can't understand people."
"Any news on the explosion?"
"Nothing much. They think the ignition area was the bakery next door.
We're still trying to piece together everything.
We have a meeting in the morning to share information.
ATF will be there, so hopefully we get something that we can move forward with.
I refuse to believe we won't get answers.
Someone needs to pay for this." Franks nodded toward Angus.
"Could be a maintenance issue. Faulty equipment. Maybe there isn't anyone to blame." Lance sighed.
"Even then, someone installed faulty equipment or maintained it wrong.
This doesn't just happen. If it did, we'd have buildings blowing up all over the place.
" Franks leaned forward, resting his hands on his thighs.
"They've called in specialists in every area I can think of.
One of them has to find something that can tell us what caused this. "
Lance nodded. "I'll leave that to you. I just want Angus to open his eyes and tell me he's okay. It's the only thing that matters."
"How much longer will they keep him in a coma?" Franks asked.
"Days, maybe weeks. They'll run more tests on Wednesday, see how he's healing. This is my life now, waiting day by day for any news. Today I look forward to Wednesday. On Wednesday they'll give me another day to look forward to."
"Have you gone home at all?" Franks asked.
Lance shook his head.
"Damn it, Lance. You have to take care of yourself. Let me sit here with him tonight and you go home. I'll call Gretta to pick you up. Get a hot shower and sleep in a comfortable bed for a few hours. Hug your damn dog and remember you have a life outside of this hospital room."
Lance smiled. "I miss Haunt, but no. My life right now is here. I need to be with him. Once he wakes up and I know he'll be okay, I'll go home more, but right now, I just can't leave him."
Franks wasn't sure if Angus knew what was going on around him, but he was pretty sure if he did, he was worrying more about Lance's wellbeing than his own. He wouldn't want Lance to sleep in a chair and live out of a bag. "Have you eaten tonight?"
"Yeah, Jackson brought me pork chops. Funny, isn't it? For years I've wanted Jackson to come home, and now that he's here, I barely see him. I'm glad he has Megan to keep him company. He didn't come home planning to take care of my home and my dog, but that's what happened." Lance closed his eyes.
"I'm sure he doesn't mind. He knows nobody planned this. I'm sure he'd rather be here helping you than overseas wondering if you were okay. Just make sure you get outside, breathe some fresh air, and get a little exercise."
"I go for a walk around the hospital grounds when Lizzy and Martin come to visit. I want them to have time alone with Angus. I'm okay. I promise. You're not the only one watching over me."
Franks gave up trying. It would do no good. "People at work have asked when they can drop by. They're waiting for Angus to be moved out of ICU before they visit or send flowers. Don't think people don't care, okay? They're just waiting until they're allowed to come."
"Tell everyone thanks. We've gotten a few floral arrangements, and I've had them sent to other patients since we can't have them here. Tell everyone to save their money and buy him lunch or something once he's back at work."
"I'll splurge on an expensive coffee maker for our office if it will help motivate him to get better." Franks laughed. "I'll give him whatever he wants if I can just see him sitting beside me again, bitching about the reports we have to write."
Lance stood and went to stand beside Angus's bed. "Hear that, love? Franks will buy a new coffee pot if you get better." He covered Angus's hand with his own. "They tell me he can hear me, but I don't know if that's true. I don't even know for sure he's still in there."
"He's there. He's too stubborn to do anything but survive. Trust me, if he left his body, he'd be here in ghostly form. He wouldn't cross over without talking to you."
"Unless he did it accidentally. The whole situation was so confusing. He might have felt the light and figured it was better than staying around. Or Betty might have pushed him into it when she flew at him. Otherwise, she'd be here as well."
"Again, we're only guessing what happened.
We have no way of knowing for sure. I believe that Angus will wake up and when he finds out you were worried, he'll be pissed you didn't have faith that he'd come to you in ghost form before moving on.
I know I've heard the two of you joke about whoever dies first waiting for the other so you can cross into the light together," Franks told him.
"I know. I keep reminding myself of that. It's what helps me get through this." Lance caressed the back of Angus's hand with his fingers. "Has Gretta said anything about work being upset I'm not there?"
"No, not at all. They all understand. It was busy over the weekend with the victims from the explosion, but they caught up on things today.
Mack and Harold are helping. They all know this is where you need to be for now.
The only thing I've heard people say about you is that they wish you'd go home for a bit instead of staying here all the time, but they also understand why you are doing that.
" Franks smiled. "Don't worry about what anyone is thinking or saying.
You do what you need to. If this is what gets you through this, then it's what you need to do.
That said, can I bring you anything? Do anything for you? "
Lance shook his head. "I'm good. Jackson is taking care of the house and dog.
Between Megan and Lizzy, I'm being fed. Hell, even the nurses here are bringing me stuff they made at home.
I got zucchini bread this morning from one nurse, and a fruit tray from another this afternoon.
I'm going to gain fifty pounds here. I'm stress eating. "
"Good. You need the energy. Stress is hard on a body. If you think of anything you want or need, give me a call. I'm happy to get it."
"Thanks. The shake hit the spot tonight." Lance smiled. "Tell everyone at work we appreciate their thoughts but also thank them for giving Angus time to recover before coming to see him. I'd feel guilty turning everyone away right now."
"Everyone understands. The last thing they want is to risk bumping the bed or doing something that might prolong his recovery.
It's enough to get updates from me. I know the dispatchers have been taking turns taking food over to Lizzy and Martin the last few nights.
And a few of the guys have said they're available to mow lawns and help out where needed while you guys deal with this. "
"Lizzy and Martin might need help, but Jackson's got my place covered.
I'm sure he'll help Lizzy out as well, but any help will be appreciated.
" Lance didn't want Jackson to have to deal with everything.
He'd just got home and Lance already felt guilty that Jackson was having to step up and handle so much.
"Martin's going to go nuts without usual golf schedule. "
Franks laughed. "I'll have to buy him one of those miniature putting greens with a ball return. He can do it from a chair."
Lance laughed. "He'd love it."
Franks slowly stood. "I'm going to head out. I just wanted to drop by and check in. You know the drill. Call if anything changes or you need anything."
"I will. You focus on finding out what caused that explosion, and if there is someone to blame, I want you to send them to prison for the rest of their life.
" Lance wanted justice if someone had caused this.
Not only for Angus, but for those who had died.
Angus was just one of many with severe injuries.
They all deserved answers. Something or someone caused that explosion and Lance wouldn't stop asking questions until they had answers.
Franks gently rested his hand on Angus's blanket covered foot. "Heal quickly." Then he looked at Lance. "We'll find answers." He gave a nod, then left the room.
As Lance watched him leave, he thought about the many lives that had been impacted by the explosion and hoped that somehow, when the answers came, they would be enough.