Chapter 11 #2
Finally, Otto speaks, his voice carefully measured like he's trying not to spook me. "As much as I know you don't want to talk about it, I think we might have to this time."
I open my eyes and turn to look at him, unsure of how to talk about last night.
How do I explain that I was drugged, that I had a heat spike even though I'm pregnant, and that I ended up in bed with Akira and Liam?
How do I put words to the terror I felt, the way my body betrayed me, the humiliation of being so out of control?
How do I come to terms with the fact that I let Akira fuck me even after the spike was over? And that I liked it?
"All I know is someone drugged me, and I don't think it was the water," I say slowly, trying to organize my thoughts into something coherent.
The bottles are notoriously checked and they were the same brand they always are.
"Which means it got into me another way.
I just… I just want to make sure my baby is okay, and then I'll figure out what to tell the investors. "
Otto's jaw tightens, and he glances at me before turning his attention back to the road. The grim expression on his face tells me he has more bad news. "They're not happy, Emilio. They're having a vote in an hour about whether or not you're fit to run Aurum Pulse."
So, I have one hour to get to the doctor, make sure my baby is okay, and figure out how to save my club. My vision tunnels slightly, black spots dancing at the edges. "I can fix this," I whisper, but my voice sounds weak even to my own ears as I drop my hands to my stomach. "I always fix this."
I sit up on the examination table, pulling my shirt back down over my stomach. After hearing that the baby was healthy and I don’t have anything really to worry about, I’ve calmed down but the anxiety is still there, chipping away at my sanity.
Dr. Chen sighs as she stares at the screen in front of her. She’s always been good about keeping her face neutral, about not letting me read her emotions too easily. But right now, there's something in the set of her jaw that is making me worried.
"Your baby boy is healthy," she says again. "However, some of the lab results are a little worrying."
The relief evaporates instantly, replaced by cold dread. "What do you mean?"
Dr. Chen turns in her chair to face me, her expression turning serious.
She folds her hands in her lap, the gesture somehow making this feel more dire.
"Your pheromone levels are rather high. Usually high enough to simulate a heat, but that doesn't tend to happen when you're pregnant.
Tell me again why you came in for a check-up, Emilio.
You weren't due for at least another week or two. "
I sigh, running a hand through my hair. "I was drugged with something and it threw me into a pseudo heat. I'm fine now but…"
"That's not how those drugs work, sweetie," Dr. Chen interrupts, shaking her head.
She stands and moves to lean against the counter, her arms crossed over her chest. "Emilio, for Omegas who aren't currently pregnant, it'll raise their pheromone levels.
They'll have a great time and then everything goes back to normal.
However, when you're pregnant, that drug isn't metabolized as fast. It's not dangerous for your baby, but it also means the heat spikes might not be over. "
"That's bullshit," I spit out and then sigh, my shoulders sagging back against the wall.
This can't be happening. I can't deal with another heat spike right now. I made it clear that it was just a one time thing with Liam and Akira and I don’t trust anyone else to help me without taking advantage. And if Zaden finds out...
"Yes, that's why those drugs can be very dangerous," Dr. Chen continues, her tone softening. "The drug itself is fine, but having a spike can be very taxing on your body. Please tell me you didn't ride it out alone?"
Heat floods my face, embarrassment crawling up my neck. "No, I had someone to help me." I start chewing on my bottom lip as I fidget with my hands, suddenly wanting to be anywhere else when those memories flit through my head again. "You’re saying that I might have another heat spike, though?"
Dr. Chen nods. "Any kind of stressful situation could throw you into another spike until the drug runs through your system.
Which for you could be all of the things you're currently doing.
Running a club, dealing with your brother, the investors…
" She pauses, studying my face. "Emilio, it might be time to take a step back. "
I laugh, the bitter edge to it way more obvious than usual.
It's such an absurd suggestion that I can't help it.
Step back? Now? When everything I've worked for is hanging by a thread?
I slide off the table, my feet hitting the floor with a heavy thump.
"I can't. Zaden will ruin everything. I'll be fine.
I'll do some breathing exercises or something.
" Even as I say it, I know how ridiculous it sounds.
Like breathing exercises are going to stop my body from betraying me again. "When am I in the all clear?"
Dr. Chen sighs, and I can see the frustration in the set of her shoulders. She knows I'm not going to listen and that I'm going to push myself until I break. But she answers anyway. "Three or so days? Either you'll have a heat spike before then, or it'll have passed through."
"Okay, great." I try to sound confident. "And you’re sure my baby is okay?" My hands fly to my stomach out of instinct, caressing the swell like I wish I could do more often in public.
Dr. Chen nods, pulling up my chart on her computer. The screen casts a blue glow across her face as she scrolls through the data. "Your levels are much better than last time. I'd ask if you're having relations with the baby's father, but you told me you don't know who that is."
The question catches me off guard. "Why would you ask that?"
"Because biologically, being around or with the baby's father is even better than just finding a random Alpha," she explains, turning back to face me.
"Your body recognizes the pheromones, responds to them in a way that's more stabilizing than a stranger's scent.
It's why bonded pairs tend to have easier pregnancies. "
"Great. Wonderful. Thank you," I say, already moving toward the door. I need to get out of here so I can refocus my mind on the disaster currently unfolding at my club.
"Let me give you some unsolicited advice," Dr. Chen says, her voice stopping me with my hand on the doorknob.
I turn back to look at her, something in her expression making me pause.
Concern, maybe. Or pity. "I know you won't stop running at full speed because you've always been like that.
But if you can take even the slightest hint of help, don't push the Alphas willing to help you away.
I know you don't trust easily, but if there's a time to find an Alpha to trust, it would be now.
" I'm about to ask why when she stands and continues, her voice taking on that serious tone again.
"Over the next week, you're going to start really showing.
There's going to be a lot of changes in your body.
Aches, pains that weren't there before. Different moods.
You're going to need someone to ground you.
Whoever that is. Just pick one person to trust, Emilio. Just one."
It sounds so simple when she says it like that, but trust has never been simple for me.
Everyone wants something. Everyone has an angle.
Zaden wants my club. The investors want control.
Even the people I sleep with want something from me, whether it's access or bragging rights or a piece of what my parents built.
But then I think about Liam. The way he held me last night, the way he made sure I was okay.
The way he's been there for months, never asking for more than I was willing to give.
And Akira, who brought me to his home instead of leaving me vulnerable in the club.
Who got angry on my behalf about someone using his drugs to hurt me.
Maybe. Maybe I could trust them. Just a little.
I nod at Dr. Chen, not trusting my voice, and leave the examination room. The receptionist gives me a small smile as I pass, but I barely register it. My mind is too crowded with everything I need to do and everything that could go wrong.
"Everything okay?" Otto asks as I slide into the seat.
"Baby's healthy," I say, buckling my seatbelt. The words should bring more relief than they do, but everything Dr. Chen said about heat spikes and stress and needing help keeps circling in my mind.