Regents After Dark
Finn
How you holding up, Wilcott? Still in Uganda?
Archie
Still here. Thriving, actually.
Cameron
So, I take it you’ve finally found your calling?
Archie
People appreciate me here. I’m rebuilding a school and—brace yourselves—I saved a bunch of kids from diarrhoea.
Wade
Good work, Archie.
Finn
Hero material, right there. Have the kids kicked you off the team yet?
Archie
Nope. I’m their official goalie now.
Cameron
So… giving up your spot at the Regents?
Finn
*Drumroll*
Archie
Nah, I think I’ll come back. Just to haunt you lot. Besides, the mosquitoes here are far too attached to me.
Wade
We’ll send them a thank you card.
Cameron
Hey, what about your neighbor? Still at each other’s throats?
Archie
We’ve had a few arguments, but she did save me from an aerial attack yesterday. Lucky to still be alive, actually.
Finn
No way.
Cameron
Birds have a serious vendetta against you, man.
Archie
Wasn’t a bird.
Finn
Bat?
Cameron
Hornet?
Archie
It was a fly. But a very dangerous one.
Finn
Ooh. Murderous fly; sounds legit.
Wade
So, you and your neighbour are friends now?
Archie
Let’s just say we’ve learned to cohabit without homicide.
Cameron
Wow. It’s a Christmas-in-July miracle!
Archie
Anyway, how are you lads?
Wade
We’re good. At the beach with my brother and his family, and the kids are having a blast. Teddy loves the sea.
Cameron
Maybe he’ll become a world-class swimmer!
Archie
Or an oceanologist?
Finn
I’ve been back in London for a few days. Already prepping for pre-season. I saw Fallon too.
Cameron
How’s she doing?
Finn
She’s okay. Just broke up with Brent. I’m not devastated—didn’t like the bloke, honestly.
Cameron
Really? Why’d they split?
Finn
Something about her not being adventurous enough. No idea.
Archie
Cam, you still in the Motherland?
Cameron
Yeah, but I’m thinking of coming home early.
Finn
What? You already missing our world-class cuisine, weather, and wit?
Cameron
You know it. Anyway, gotta run. Talk soon.
Wade
Me too. We’re starting a game in a minute.
Archie
Gotta dash too. Battery’s dying, and I’m on latrine duty.
Finn
Ew. Seriously? What did you sign up for?
Archie
Trust me. You’re not ready for the details.