Chapter Thirty-Six
Garett
Cookie jumps up at me as Ruby’s parents, Iain and Liz, welcome me into the house.
“You have a key that you can use at any time,” Iain says as I cuddle Cookie. “Not that we mind opening the door, as it’s always lovely to see Cookie’s excitement with you.”
I smile and say the same thing every time he or Liz opens the door. “I don’t want to be rude. You’ve been so kind, and I can’t thank you enough for this.”
“But think of my weary body every time I have to get up,” he jokes.
“Don’t listen to him,” Liz adds. “It’s good for him to get his lazy bum out of the chair. He spends too much time watching Columbo and eating Ruby’s baking.”
We have this conversation almost daily, and I lap it up like the needy-for-family man I am. It’s the real reason I still knock. I live for it.
“There’s nothing lazy about my bum,” Iain replies as he proceeds to chase Liz around the open plan kitchen that looks like something out of a Cotswold Homes brochure. Cookie joins in and starts chasing them.
It’s a thump to my chest. For years, I’ve tried to prove myself and create a business that shows that my childhood didn’t define me. I’ve always chosen work above a potential relationship. And yet, when Liz whips Iain with a teatowel as he wiggles his bum at her, there’s this deep pull in me. I want a partner to chase me around our kitchen as Cookie jumps around us. I hold my breath. When I imagine it, it’s Ruby chasing me.
But I can’t want her.
There’s a knock at the door.
“I’ll get it, if that’s okay. It’s my little sister, Flora. We’re going to walk Cookie together.”
“Of course,” Liz says with a smile.
“Now be on your best, woman. Garett is used to your towel-whipping ninja skills, but Flora is a guest,” Iain says with a waggle of his eyebrows, which earns him a slap around the arse.
I chuckle as I open the door, but that pull for a future grips me like a vice. Even if Ruby could be mine, I haven’t got the money to make it happen. If I still owned the restaurant, I’d sell my half to Clive, but he ended that dream like he tried to destroy me. There’s one other way I could earn money, but it means saying goodbye to the life I have now.
“Stop worrying,” Flora says as soon as I open the door. “It’s like you’re trying to plan a coup.”
It’s her turn for the Cookie experience. He barks and bounds up to her.
I grumble but check myself in the mirror by the door. Worry lines cover my face. It’s been two weeks since I acted like Ruby’s boyfriend, and the experience has warmed my heart and panicked me every moment, as has my new secret.
We’ve been rushed off our feet at the cookery school, and after each session, I’ve stayed behind and helped her with her baking skills. It fills me with this unending joy and painful anguish. We’ve not mentioned hooking up again, but we’re both thinking about it. There’s been tentative kisses and touches. I love teasing her and the warmth that fills my body when she smiles because she’s conquered a new skill.
“Let’s go for that walk,” Flora says, pulling me out of my internal debates. She’s been speaking to Iain and Liz the entire time, and I have no idea what they were saying. “Hopefully, the fresh air will help, or you’re going to end up like one of those chefs with permanent forehead wrinkles.”
“You’re not too old for me to ground you.” She rolls her eyes. “Right. Let’s get Cookie on a lead. Come on, boy.”
Flora waggles the leash that’s already clipped into Cookie’s harness.
“What’s going on in your head, Garett?” Liz comments.
“I have an idea,” Flora replies, pushing me out the door. “It was lovely to see you both. I shall work on what we talked about.”
I cock my eyebrow as she shoves me out the door. “Secrets?”
“I’ll tell you all about it in a minute, but first, I want to know what’s causing that storm in your head. Is it a certain red jewel?”
I speed up my steps.
◆◆◆
“Cookie, do you want your ball?”
Cookie spins, his tongue lolling and his tail wagging. His big brown eyes fix on the ball. He looks like I feel when I’m with Ruby: all desperate and focused.
“What’s going on?”
I shrug before throwing Cookie’s ball relatively close. He’s back in seconds, the perfect distraction for getting out of Flora’s interrogation.
She glares at me and elbows me out of the way as I try to grab it. She throws it farther than I ever could.
“I forgot you were on the local rounders team. Is there anything you can’t do?”
“Decide where to focus my efforts rather than picking up everything and dropping it.” I forgot what she might be going through, as I’ve been caught up in my problems. “But this isn’t about me. Is Ruby the reason you’re jumping between every emotion these days? I’ve seen you with her, and you’re happier than ever.”
“It’s not that,” I reply, still avoiding the topic of Ruby. “The owner of a Michelin Star restaurant in Ireland, Ciara Kelly, is considering me for a job. Did you ever meet her?”
Flora smiles broadly. “She worked with you and Clive a couple of times. She was the best.”
I nod. “She was. If I get the job and accept it, I’ll be gone for a long time. I’m not sure if I’d see you for months.” Or if I’d see Ruby.
Flora stares at me like I’ve grown another head. “But you love the cookery school.”
I sigh and lower my gaze. “I know, but I miss working in a restaurant, and I need money to run my own business in the future.” I look up. Her eyes are wide. She’s sucked her lower lip into her mouth, and it reminds me of when she was bullied and she’d come home but refuse to cry. “I don’t want to leave you, Flora. You’re the best little sister I’ve ever had.”
She punches me. “Stop using that line.”
I laugh, but it’s not my usual chuckle. “But you are, and I wouldn’t want any others.” Cookie returns and Flora flings the ball again. She is fantastic at so many things. All I’ve got is being a chef. “I want to stay, but no restaurants locally will take me because they’re all scared of your brother. Clive never had influence over Ciara. She knows I can do great things and wants me to create menus and make the place my own.”
Flora’s sigh is like that of a dejected warrior who knows the battle is lost. “How will you tell the staff at the cookery school?”
“They’ll understand. The business is growing, and there’s enough skill there as it is. They’ll be able to get different chefs for different types of classes. Having me there as their regular chef limits them.”
Flora guffaws. “Sure, tell yourself that if it makes you feel better. It’s not only about the school, though. They’ve all welcomed you in as part of their family.”
“It’s just a job,” I lie. My forehead wrinkles again. Kath checking in on me every morning, Wicksy coming to me for relationship advice, the window to Iain and Liz’s life—it’s like the family I never knew I needed.
“And Ruby? Is she another co-worker?”
I focus on Cookie’s ears flapping as he sprints back.
“She likes you,” Flora adds, gripping my shoulders and turning me to face her. “Don’t play games with her if it doesn’t mean anything.”
I toy with the idea of telling Flora about my arrangement with Ruby, but I promised I wouldn’t. “She’s a friend. That’s how we both see it,” I reply brusquely, gritting my teeth.
“I’m not sure that’s how she sees it. Based on something she said to Kath.”
My heart jumps with hope, but it’s like a firework, and as it hits a high, it quickly turns and crashes back down. In a month, she’ll be deciding whether she works with Clive because I’ll have told her the truth. I’ll be away, and that’s precisely how it should be. It’s for the best. Yet it feels like I’m destroying myself from the inside out.
“It doesn’t matter. I don’t want to know what she said.” Yet curiosity controls every fibre of my being. “Tell me about the plans you’re making with Iain and Liz. What’s happening?”
As she talks, I bury my face in Cookie’s fur and attempt to control my feelings before I hurt anyone else or send myself into a spiralling pain I can’t escape.
.