Chapter 16
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
ANDRéS
I straighten Chispa’s rugs, checking she’s warm enough, but not too warm. She sighs a little.
“I know, girl, but you’ll feel better soon,” I murmur to her.
She’s over the worst and now just needs monitoring, but the panic that came over me when I was told she had colic is still fresh in my mind.
It’s not uncommon, but can be fatal if not dealt with quickly.
The frantic dash for the barn, shouting for someone to call the vet.
When I reached her, Jorge was trying to back her out of the stall.
She was trying to lie down so she could roll, and in such a narrow space she’d have got stuck and would’ve ended up injured as well.
With the help of Kit, Linden’s groom, it took three of us to get her out, then we made sure she kept moving and didn’t lie down until the vet arrived.
It’s been a tense few hours, but her stomach has settled now and she’s no longer desperate to relieve the pain by rolling, which is where the danger is.
We’ve moved her into a larger enclosed stall at the end of the barn where she can rest properly, and now it’s been a couple of hours since she last had a spasm, I can offer her some food.
So I mix some warm water in with some grass pellets to soften them for her.
I’ve sent Jorge to bed for the night. I know it was his mistake that caused it, but I can’t stand his mournful, sorry face right now.
I get to her stall, about to unbolt the door, when I hear a noise from down the barn.
I glance at the source and see someone near my horses, they’re looking around frantically.
“Simon?” I call and he spins round, his eyes wide. Shit! I forgot to let him know what had happened. I didn’t give a thought to anything except Chispa. He’s probably mad at me, but the horses are always my priority. I’m not going to change that, ever.
“There you are!” he says walking towards me, and I go to meet him halfway.
As he gets closer I don’t see anger, I see concern and worry.
“For a moment I thought . . . Well, I don’t know what I thought when I couldn’t see Chispa.
Is she alright? When Gabriel said one of your horses was sick, I .
. .” His voice trails off and he swallows, then he looks at me and repeats in a frightened whisper, “Is she alright?”
My heart catches on his look and his question. He hasn’t rushed out here to tell me off for not meeting with him, his first thought is for my horse, and the rush of warmth that floods through my body makes me dizzy. He’s still gazing at me with a stricken look and I realise I haven’t answered him.
“She will be.”
“Oh, thank god.” He puts a hand against his chest and releases a huge sigh.
My dizziness increases and I feel lightheaded, my legs feel like jelly.
It must be an effect of the shock and stress of the last few hours.
“Would you like to see her?” I ask and he nods emphatically.
I lead the way to her stall and he looks over the door.
“Hey, sweetheart. Feeling rough, are we?” he says softly to her. She flicks her ears at his voice and turns to look at him with her large brown eyes.
“I’m just about to give her some food. Do you want to come in?”
“I brought her some carrots,” he says, pulling a bag from the pocket of my coat he’s still wearing. Fuck, he brought carrots. How on earth is he not the sweetest guy on this planet? He must be, that’s all there is to it.
“She can’t have carrots right now,” I say.
“Not even special julienned ones?” He holds up the bag with a smile, and I press my lips together to repress the urge I have to kiss him right now.
“Not even those. She has to have something soft, but she should be able to have them with another feed in a few hours time. Or you can give them to the others,” I suggest.
“These are for her,” he states clearly and puts them back in his pocket. I place the bucket of food in front of her and she starts on it with enthusiasm, a good sign that she’s getting better.
“What happened?” Simon asks, watching her.
“It was a silly mistake. Jorge got the buckets mixed up and gave her cold water.”
“Is that a problem?” I hear the confusion in his voice.
“Not in general. Obviously horses can drink cold water or they’d never survive, especially in the winter.
But they shouldn’t have it cold when they’ve been working, especially with how hot and sweaty she was after the game.
The water up here is particularly cold, so we add warm water to take the chill off it so it’s safe to drink. ”
“What happens when that occurs?” He sounds genuinely interested so I carry on.
“The cold water upsets her stomach and causes her to spasm. Those in general will dissipate, but when horses have stomach and digestive pain they try to roll on the floor to ease it. If they do it violently enough, they can twist their guts up, and that causes problems . . . blockages, knots. Sometimes it requires surgery, but sometimes not even that helps.” I stop, as I think he’s got the idea and doesn’t need the full lesson in horse anatomy.
I don’t want to talk about it anymore. I’ve lost a couple of good horses that way and I’m just thankful Chispa won’t be one of them.
“And she’ll be okay, that won’t happen to her?”
“There’s always a chance of a relapse, but I don’t think it will happen now she’s settled.” He’s moved closer and is stroking her neck as she eats. I’m transfixed watching him with her, and the weak-kneed feeling returns. I shake it off; it’s been a long night.
“I’m sorry that this won’t be the celebration I promised you. But I’m not leaving her tonight,” I say, hoping he’s not too disappointed. He looks at me with the soft look he has for Chispa still on his face.
“Then I’ll stay too,” he says.
“Are you sure? You don’t have to.”
“I want to.” His face takes on a determined look, but I try one more time.
“It’ll be cold.”
“I have a warm jacket on.” He grins and I shake my head, smiling back at his stubbornness and cheek.
“Okay. Don’t say I didn’t warn you,” I say, and he returns to talking to Chispa.
I find a bale of horse bedding to put in the stall, against one of the walls, and some blankets to lay on top of it to make it softer.
I sit down and lean back against the wall looking at them both.
My favourite horse and Simon. Who is not only the cutest guy I’ve ever seen, he’s the sweetest, and I admit he looks fucking hot in my coat.
As if he senses me staring at him he turns and looks over, then his face changes into a frown and he reaches into a pocket.
“Oh, I brought you this. I’m sorry, it might be cold by now.” He comes over and hands me something wrapped in napkins.
“You brought me food?” I can’t believe he also thought of me.
I haven’t eaten since, I can’t remember, lunch maybe .
. . and I wasn’t hungry, or rather I didn’t notice I was until he handed me some food.
Now I feel like I haven’t eaten for weeks.
I peel off the napkins to find foil wrapping underneath.
I open it up. A steak sandwich, with onions, in ciabatta.
It is still warm but I wouldn’t care if it was as cold as stone, Nothing would look as good as this does right now.
I take a bite and it’s glorious. The juices from the steak and onions have soaked into the bread and it’s the best mouthful I’ve ever had.
I could seriously fall in love with someone who brought me food like this.
I freeze mid chew and glance up at Simon.
He’s returned to being by Chispa’s head.
Phew, I don’t think I said that out loud.
I force myself to keep chewing even though I can hardly breathe around the truth of my words.
I finish the rest of the sandwich while thoughts bounce around my head.
I’ve never met anyone like Simon before, and I don’t know how or why, but I feel a connection with him, one I don’t want to lose.
An idea begins to form but I have no idea what he’ll say.
You don’t know until you ask, I try to reason with myself, but it’s not that easy.
I’ve never been good at showing emotion, unless it’s for my horses.
I look over at Simon and Chispa again and they make the perfect picture, one I want to be a part of.
“Thank you for bringing me a sandwich. You’re a lifesaver,” I say, rising and going to stand with them. He makes a small huff of a laugh.
“Hardly the stuff of saving lives, but I thought you might not have had a chance to eat.” He turns to face me and I put my arms round his waist, pulling him close to me. He rests his head against my chest.
“It meant a lot to me.” I take a deep breath.
“You mean a lot to me.” He looks up sharply at my words, and I can’t stand the thought of him saying something frivolous or even worse, a rejection, so I capture his mouth with mine and kiss him.
It’s not soft, but not desperate either.
It’s something else entirely. He opens up at the request of my tongue against his lips and I deepen the kiss.
He grabs my hips and I tighten my hold, clinging on to him tight as my heart fills and bursts in my chest.
I don’t want the kiss to end, ever. Nothing has felt this right in my life, and I know once I stop it never will again.
I explore every inch of his mouth, aware of every place we’re touching, the warmth from his body pressed against mine.
Like a hot brand on a horse’s hide, the kiss burns into my soul.
Eventually he pulls back, slowly, panting for breath, and I gasp air into my lungs.
“I’ll bring you food more often if you’ll kiss me like that,” he says, his chest still heaving.
“I’d like that,” I say and lead him over to the bale seat, He sinks down onto it and I join him. I half turn towards him. “I have an idea.”
I reach for his hand, holding it between mine.
“What’s this grand plan of yours?” he asks. His tone is light and I take a deep breath. I don’t feel prepared to say this but I need to.
“I’m leaving tomorrow, probably today now. I don’t want this to be goodbye, Simon. It’s probably crazy to say this but it doesn’t feel like only a few days since I met you. You’ve made me feel in a way I never thought possible. You’ve lit a fire in me I can’t extinguish, nor do I want to.”
I stop, holding my breath, waiting for his reaction.
“I feel it too,” he says quietly. “Earlier today, I wasn’t going to come to watch you play.
I told myself it was pointless as you were leaving, but when the time came, I couldn’t stay away.
I had to be there. I don’t understand it, but it’s the truth.
” There’s a sadness to his deep blue eyes and I squeeze his hand.
“Remember I told you that Gabriel was setting up a new equestrian centre? It’s going to have a spa, as well as a bar and restaurant. I know Gabriel is looking for a chef, so what if you came with us?”
For a brief moment hope flares in his eyes before they darken again.
“What does Gabriel say?”
“I haven’t talked to him yet, but he likes you. I’m sure it wouldn’t be a problem.”
“I see.” He withdraws his hand from mine and shoves it with his other between his knees. I feel the loss as if he’d ripped it straight from my heart. He looks at me.
“Andrés, I appreciate you trying to help, I really do. But I don’t want a job because it’s done as a favour for someone. I want it because I’m a good chef and deserve it.”
“You’re a brilliant chef,” I blurt out but he just gives me a small sad smile.
“Thank you, but I’ve put my trust in people before and I’ve been burned. I need to do this on my own. Please understand that.”
The sad fact is I do understand him, as much as it causes me pain. “What happens now?”
“You go to England,” he says. “I’ll finish my contract here. If Gabriel is still looking for a chef and it looks like the right job for me, I’ll apply. But I don’t want any favours or special treatment. I have to know I’m worthy of it.”
His determination is one of the things I admire about him, one of his great qualities.
“What about us?” I ask and this time he takes my hand.
“That’s the other part. I feel a connection to you, Andrés. It feels like more than an infatuation based on a few great days and awesome nights. But I need to know that it is. If what we have is special, it’ll survive a few weeks of separation. If not, then it’s been amazing.”
A hole opens in my chest, not helped by the knowledge that he’s right.
“How are you so wise?” I ask.
“Well, I haven’t had the advantage of being a playboy.”
“Hey!” I say, but I see his smirk. I lean forward and kiss it right off his face.
“Will you still stay here with me now?” I ask when we break from making out.
“Of course,” he says, tucking himself against me, and I pull a blanket around us to keep warm. “I want to make sure my sweetheart is alright.” He nods towards Chispa.
I look at him and the smirk is back. I roll my eyes at him. What we have is special, I know it.