Chapter Seventeen
“Is she still out there?”
Standing by the lancet window in their borrowed chamber at Lioncross, Essien nodded.
“She is,” he said. “Her mother is trying to convince her to come inside.”
Catalina had been seated at a dressing table that Brielle had brought in from another part of the keep.
She had been permitted to collect all of her possessions in her father’s tent, and Adabella and Ines were safe and happy in the nursery at Lioncross with the other de Lohr grandchildren for the night, so the events following the short mass at Lioncross’s chapel had run fairly smoothly.
Except for one.
Rebecca.
Even now, she was standing in the bailey below their bedchamber window, crying as if her heart was broken.
She’d been informed of the marriage, like the rest of the de Lohr household, because a special supper was prepared away from the feast for the tournament competitors as Essien didn’t want five hundred people celebrating his wedding when all he really wanted to do was celebrate quietly with his new wife.
Therefore, preparations had been made for a small supper that was only attended by the couple, Harald, Christopher and his entire family, plus Addax, David, Peter, Ashton, Rhys and Maddoc, the de Wolfe brothers, Paris, and Kieran.
That was the extent of the circle, and it was a lovely meal of roasted chicken to celebrate what had been a quick blessing by the priest from the church of St. Andrew in the village.
That blessing followed a wedding mass, and about four hours after Essien won the joust tournament, he found himself with a wife and a new life.
And he couldn’t have been happier.
But Rebecca wasn’t.
She didn’t create a fuss during the mass or the meal, probably because her mother threatened her were she to do so, but now that everything was over, night was upon them and so was her lack of restraint.
With the feast for the competitors going on in the great hall, Rebecca planted herself in the bailey and wept below Essien’s bedchamber window.
Both Essien and Catalina could hear the sounds, now with Dustin trying everything she could to force Rebecca inside.
It was the least bit dramatic.
“I am sorry she is so upset,” Catalina said, standing next to Essien as they both peered from the window. “If I thought it would help, I would speak with her. Mayhap to assure her that I will take good care of you and she needn’t worry.”
Essien put his arm around her shoulders. “I do not think she is worried about someone taking good care of me,” he said. “It only matters that she is not taking care of me. Thank God.”
Catalina laughed softly. “It is difficult to be so young and so in love.”
Essien shook his head. “Make no mistake,” he said.
“She is not in love. In fact, if none of this had happened, she probably would have forgotten about me by tomorrow, but the fact that I’ve gotten married before she’s had a chance to try to woo me has somehow made this into more of a personal failure to her rather than a lost love. ”
Catalina looked up at him. “Do you want to hear something odd?”
“What?”
“I have never been infatuated with anyone.”
“Never?”
She shook her head and moved away from the window.
“Never,” she said. “I went to foster very young. Right after my mother died, in fact. I was barely Adabella’s age when my father sent me off to Thetford Castle in East Anglia.
I was there until he summoned me home to marry Alfred.
Believe me, there was no one at Thetford to become infatuated with.
They were either too old or too young or too wild. ”
Essien leaned against the wall by the window, folding his big arms across his chest. “Thetford is de Winter’s holding.”
“It is.”
“No nice, shiny de Winter knights?”
“None worthy of my time.”
He laughed softly. “How cruel,” he said. “But tell me about your mother. Where was she born?”
Catalina made it over to the bed, looking at the garments that Brielle and Christin and Dustin had loaned her, all spread out over the mattress.
“She was from Catalonia,” she said. “I was born on the feast day of St. Catalina of Alexandria, so she named me after the saint. Her family name was Antequera, a cadet branch of the House of Trastamara. My great-uncle ruled Catalonia, in fact.”
“So you have royal blood,” Essien said.
She nodded. “Aye,” she said. “Very minor, however. Trastamara is the ruling house of Aragon, and my family is simply an offshoot. My mother had several older brothers and sisters, but she married my father because of the Earldom of Mercia.”
“What do you remember of her?”
Catalina shrugged. “She died when I was very young,” she said.
“In truth, I do not know what killed her. My father would never speak of it and the servants would only tell me that she fell ill with a fever. But I remember her voice. I remember that she had hair like mine, dark and wavy. I remember the feelings of love from her. I think that’s why I hug my girls so much.
I want them to feel that love, to remember it.
I was so young when I lost that security, like you were. ”
Essien nodded. “I was even younger than you,” he said. “Until Hereford found my brother and me in the Levant, my life was a horrendous existence.”
She sat back down in the dressing chair, listening with interest. “Do you remember much of it?”
“I remember enough,” he said. “It is not something I really speak of because to speak of it makes me live it again, and I do not wish to do that. I will tell you someday, but not tonight. Tonight is for us, not the horrors of the past. I only want good memories of this night.”
She smiled faintly. “I would like that,” she said. But her smile soon faded. “This has all come about so quickly that I’ve not had time to be anxious or nervous.”
“Why would you be?”
She shrugged, turning back for the mirror and picking up her tortoiseshell comb.
“A wedding night is always a nervous time for a bride,” she said.
“The fear of the unknown, I suppose. The first time, it was because I did not know what to expect, but this time… the same can be said. You and I hardly know each other, Essien. We’ve not even kissed one another on the mouth.
Not even at our wedding mass. And now we are expected to consummate this union.
Strangers consummating a sudden marriage. ”
He came away from the wall, taking her concerns very seriously. “If you do not feel comfortable doing this tonight, we do not have to,” he said. “I would never expect you to do anything you are uncomfortable with, Catalina.”
He lay down on the bed, on his side, with his head propped up on his hand and a bent elbow. They were nearly eye level as she combed her hair pensively. Truthfully, all she could feel from him was sincerity. He wasn’t speaking the words because he thought that was what she wanted to hear.
He meant them.
She hoped he would always mean them.
“Are you always like this, Essien?” she said softly. “So considerate? Or are you only considerate now because this situation is so new? Will you forget in the months and years to come?”
He watched her as she combed her hair, studying her fine profile, her beautiful eyes. “Your father today,” he said. “Has he always treated you like that?”
“Always. Why?”
He nodded his head in understanding. “Now your question makes sense,” he said. “Will I always be considerate to you? I hope so. I will always try. I will never show you such disrespect as your father does. I am simply not like that.”
She looked at him, then. “Alfred was not terribly considerate, either,” she said. “You must understand that my experiences with men are my father and my dead husband. If I seem suspicious of your kindness, I hope you will forgive me and be patient. A kind man is very new to me.”
“Would you rather I be a tyrant?”
She laughed softly. “Definitely not,” she said. “I would rather you be simply Essien, the man who is now my husband.”
“Does it make you happy?”
A smile played on her lips. “I believe it does,” she said. “I was not so certain about it yesterday, but today… it is my hope that this is the start of something wonderful.”
He reached out, taking her hand. “It is,” he murmured. “I can feel it. We are going to know happiness that people seldom do.”
“Do you truly think so?”
“I do,” he said. “But, as I said, I want you to be comfortable with me. I realize that will take time, so take the time you need. If I can help, I hope you will tell me.”
She simply smiled at him, looking him over.
He was a handsome man as it was, and growing more handsome by the moment in her eyes.
There was something very strong and noble about him, like a knight from lore.
She could have never hoped to have a man such as him for her husband, but here she was. Here he was.
It was like a dream.
“I am comfortable with you,” she said after a moment. “I have been since the start. You’ve never once tried to force anything, and that is appreciated more than you know.”
He gave her hand a little squeeze. “This was a surprising situation for us both,” he said. “It would do no good to make a tense situation worse. We were both of the same mindset of not wanting to marry.”
“I have news on that front.”
“What is that?”
“I have changed my mind.”
He snorted. “That is good,” he said. “Because I have, too. It is good that we both feel the same way.”
“Considering we had no choice, that is a good thing.”
He winked at her. “Exactly.”
Catalina giggled. “Speaking of being forced by Hereford,” she said. “Do you live here at Lioncross? Is that where we are to live?”
He shook his head. “Nay, I do not live here,” he said. “My brother’s properties are to the north, in Cumbria, and I am the garrison commander for one of his holdings, Raisbeck Castle. Lots of sheep and meat and wool. It turns a tidy profit.”
“Then that is where we shall live?”