Chapter 21
Chapter Twenty-One
LARK
“ W hoever decided running was the best form of exercise was a damn sociopath.” My panted words come out between heaves as Kelsey and I come to a stop in front of the conservation center on the edge of town.
When I woke up in Liam’s arms this morning, my entire body was on fire. And not just because the man is a walking furnace. Somehow during the night I had ended up sprawled on top of his massive body, so I woke up straddling his hips with a very prominent erection digging into my pelvis.
I thought about waking him up for some fun, but the longer I laid there surrounded by Liam’s warmth, the less I wanted to move. It’s been so long since I was just held that I couldn’t bring myself to end the experience early.
Kelsey wheezes, startling me out of my trance. Shoving all thoughts of my hot-as-sin landlord-slash-fake-boyfriend away, I try to remember what I just said. She tries to laugh, but all that comes out is a gag. “You said you wanted to get back in shape. And considering the only shape I’m getting in over the next nine months is round, this is me supporting you. Solidarity sister!” Another gag.
My jaw drops and I rush her, gripping her upper arms and shaking. “You’re having a baby?!”
The next gag turns into throwing up over a rickety metal railing overlooking a set of tide pools. “There, there,” I say awkwardly, patting her back with a grimace. I’ve never been very good at comforting sick people, my brother and Liam being the only exceptions.
The door to the conservation center swings open and a frantic ball of brunette hair flies toward us at full speed with a much smaller ball of black fur trailing behind, barking happily. “Oh my gosh, I saw you get sick through the windows, are you okay? Should I call someone? We could call 9-1-1, but you know how they are, it would be faster just to drive out to the hospital. Fish, hush !”
My eyes feel like saucers in my head as I struggle to process everything happening right now. Kelsey has a wet rag being pressed to her mouth by who I can now see is a very petite brunette woman in an Echo Cove Ocean Conservation t-shirt with a pair of water goggles perched on the top of her head and pink rubber gloves on her small hands.
“I don’t need an ambulance, I just need to stop trying to be a good friend,” Kelsey huffs.
That has a snort escaping before I can stop it, and the newcomer’s kind hazel eyes flash to mine in surprise. Giving her my best customer service smile, I try to make it seem like we aren’t as crazy as we look. “She’s joking. I said I wanted to start running again and my sweet friend Kelsey decided to accompany me against her better judgment.”
The stranger nods like that makes perfect sense before turning to Kelsey. “It’s okay, running makes me sick, too.” She holds out a hand, smiling in a way that feels genuine. “I’m Kaia. I just started working here a few months ago. Are you two from around here?”
My smile comes easier in the face of her kindness. “I’m Lark, and in case it wasn’t clear, that’s Kelsey,” I tease, hooking a thumb over at my slightly green friend. “We’re both local, actually. Born and raised here, but I just recently moved back after a short stint in New York. How are you?—”
A sharp nip at my ankle pulls my attention. “Ouch!” I finally get a good look at the tiny ball of fluff that followed Kaia out here and nearly melt. Those sharp teeth are attached to the sweetest puppy I’ve ever seen in my life. Its fur is mostly black, but it has the cutest brown and white spots on its paws, chest, and face.
“Is it yours?” I ask Kaia. Irrational jealousy laces my tone. I’ve always wanted a dog, but was never in a position to get one.
Until now.
She shakes her head. “We found him down by the docks last night after the fireworks. It was the craziest thing; I was working the late shift monitoring one of our sick baby sea lions when I heard loud whines coming from underneath the main dock. I grabbed one of the techs to help me check it out and this little guy was hiding out in the shallows with Baymax. I’ve been calling him Fish, but I’m sure they’ll rename him at the shelter.”
“The shelter?” My head jerks up sharply at the word.
Kaia nods, a knowing grin quirking her lips, and Kelsey looks at me like I’m insane. “I live in the apartment above the center, so I can’t keep him, and nobody else could take him. I was actually on my way to drop him off when I saw you two out here.”
Kelsey gives me a questioning look, the same one she used to give me when we were teens and I was about to get us into a world of trouble. “Whatcha thinkin’?”
Smirking, I heft Fish into my arms, laughing as he licks all over my face. “I think I’m about to test my landlord’s patience.”
After a not-so-quick stop at the only pet store in town, I’ve got Fish on a leash standing on the back porch of Liam’s beautiful house. “Sit, Fish,” I command. He’s a quick study, and according to the kind woman at the pet store, he’s a Bernese Mountain Dog. And he’s definitely just a baby, she guessed he’s probably not more than eight weeks old.
Leveling my gaze with his deep brown eyes, I keep my voice firm but kind, just like the internet told me to. “You’re about to meet a very large man. A man who does not know you’re coming home with me. So I need you to be on your best behavior, do you understand me?”
He yips, making me grin. I know he’s probably just responding to the tone of my voice, but I also think I may have accidentally absconded with a genius dog. “Okay,” I murmur, standing to face the door. “Here goes nothing.”
There’s music playing when we enter the house, and Fish stops to sniff absolutely everything.
“Red, is that you?”
“Yeah!”
“How was your run?”
Liam is sitting on the couch in the living room watching some nature show narrated by David Attenborough, completely oblivious to the puppy running hot laps around his house. “Okay, so something happened, and I don’t want you to be mad at me.”
His head whips around, mouth open to speak, when Fish chooses that moment to make his presence known by jumping on the couch and attacking Liam with slobbery kisses. I watch as the big, burly man melts into the couch, snuggling the puppy to his chest. “You brought home a puppy ? Are you joking?”
The question makes me cringe. “Are you mad?”
He scoffs, a huge smile on his face. “Mad? I’ll never let you move out now. Not without joint custody of the sweetest baby in the world,” he coos in a baby voice.
My jaw drops, and it takes serious effort to hold back my laughter at this 6’6 beast using a baby voice on a puppy. “His name is Fish,” I explain. “They found him down by the docks at the conservation center last night with Baymax. The employee who found him said he was whimpering and scared, so he was probably hiding from the fireworks.”
Instantly, Liam’s gaze darts to mine as he drops rapid-fire questions that I don’t have the answers to. “The docks? Was he hurt? Does he have a microchip? What if he’s sick? I’m calling a vet.” The more he asks, the less confident I feel in my decision. He’s asking things I wouldn’t have even considered before.
Am I ready for this kind of commitment? I panicked just at the thought of starting something real with Liam less than three days ago, but somehow I thought making a ten to fifteen year commitment was a good idea?
Just before the panic can fully take hold, Liam’s deep voice reaches my ears, tinged with concern. It doesn’t seem to matter that he’s not speaking to me, the low timbre soothes my frayed nerves. I watch with rapt fascination as he wrangles Fish on the couch with one hand while seamlessly engaging in a panicked, albeit quiet, phone conversation with the other.
You know how some people say seeing a big, strong man with a baby makes their ovaries explode? Liam Blackwell with a puppy is my version of that. I’ve never really wanted kids, but seeing this tattooed giant being so sweet with a puppy definitely has me seeing the appeal.
It also helps feeling like I’m not taking this on alone. Liam is so excited, and I hope at the very least this means I’ll have a partner in puppy-parenting.
“Okay.” He stands up with Fish in his arms, making his way over to me with the biggest smile I’ve ever seen on his face. “ Fish has an appointment at Echo Cove vet clinic, so we should probably get going or we’re going to be late.”
“When? Don’t you have to work?”
“Not today. I decided to give Riley the day off and take a personal day.”
Suspicion settles in my chest hearing the nervous lilt to his words. I know it’s a Sunday, but I guess I assumed he would be taking clients today to make up for being closed for the Fourth yesterday. “Any particular reason?”
A flush creeps up his neck, settling on his cheeks and ears as he uses his free hand to rub the back of his neck. My stomach churns with anxiety the longer he goes without saying anything. “I, uh…I was kind of hoping we could go do something together,” he mumbles.
His words and their possible meaning have my heart stuttering in my chest. Does he mean he wants to go on a date? The whole fake dating thing hasn’t really been necessary since we haven’t seen Jake or Madisen around the last few days, but that doesn’t mean we haven’t been spending time together.
Nearly every minute of the last week when one or the other wasn’t working, we’ve been together. Movies on the couch, the Fourth of July party, walks on the beach. Being with Liam is as easy as breathing. He doesn’t make me talk about my feelings, or ask me questions about the future. When we’re together I have the freedom to be myself, and it feels really damn good.
At first it just felt good to get revenge on Jake, show him I’ve moved on and that his words didn’t mean anything to me, but the more I’m around Liam, the more I like him. He’s kind in a way that very few men in my life have been, never once judging me or making me feel bad for my attitude. And I have to admit, his little quirks are pretty endearing.
During my tattoo last week, he went off on a tangent about the pH levels being the determining factor in the color of hydrangeas, and while normally I couldn’t care less about why my plants look pretty, knowing he brought up the blue kind specifically because they’re my favorite flower had a riot of butterflies taking flight in my belly.
But no matter how comfortable I am with him, there’s always this lingering fear in the back of my mind. Of getting too close to him and ruining not only our budding friendship, but also his friendship with Keelan. I know things ended badly and it came down to a choice, Keelan would choose me, but I never want to put him through that.
I ruin relationships. It’s what I’m known for.
Workaholic Lark, she spends too much time away from home.
Bitchy Lark, she’s always busting the balls of every man she meets.
Aloof Lark, she refuses to let anyone get too close.
When you hear so many negative things about yourself for so long, eventually it becomes hard to discern what’s really me and what are the things I’ve allowed to be shaped by other people’s opinions. The thought of giving in to this attraction I feel for Liam and him seeing all of me is paralyzing. Because what if he doesn’t like what he sees? What if it’s too much for him just like it has been for every other guy I’ve tried to date?
I’m not sure I’d survive that.