Chapter 16
A week goes by, and Danny’s stuck like he’s in the middle of a math test, trying to figure out a way to see more of Sasha during his trip to the US.
It’s hard not to think about how much simpler it would be if Sasha would just let him meet Alina, and honestly, he’s still feeling pretty hurt from their phone call.
He’s not sure what was worse: hearing that Sasha had planned for a few hurried hookups in LA, and that was it; or finding out that Sasha had never mentioned him at all to Alina, not even in a “hey, check out this random dude’s high bar routine” way.
He knows, of course, that Sasha was only trying to keep their relationship a secret.
But that doesn’t make it any less tough a pill to swallow, and he can’t help thinking of the other times Sasha’s held him at arm’s length before—like a few months ago, when it had seemed so easy for him to drop their phone calls for two weeks, as if he didn’t even miss Danny.
They’d worked through that eventually, but Danny has to admit, it still bothers him a little that they’d had to schedule every single call for the rest of the tour.
Like Sasha’s scribbling him into the margins of his calendar, as far away as possible from all the other parts of his life.
So yeah, the trip planning isn’t going so well.
Which is why, when Matt FaceTimes him out of the blue, he’s eager for a distraction—and curious, too, because Matt’s even worse than Sasha when it comes to phone calls.
He barely texts, either, except for the occasional meme or gymnastics video, which is basically their only form of communication now that he’s retired and the tour’s over.
“Hey, man.” Danny pauses his Xbox game and leans back against the basement couch, scratching Buddy’s ears. “What’s up?”
“Sup, bro.” Matt looks like he’s on a shaded lounge chair, probably in the pool area outside his new apartment building in Dallas, Texas.
He’d moved there after tour to be closer to Julia, since her parents hadn’t wanted them living together until they both had jobs first—which mostly meant Matt, since Julia’s been raking in sponsorship deals since Rio.
“Are you still doing summer camp at your gym?”
Danny perks up, hoping this is going where he thinks it is. “Yeah, you wanna come coach again? I’m around, like, every week except Nationals.”
Matt pumps his fist. “Hell yes. Thanks, man, you totally just saved my ass. Jules’s sister’s getting married in August, like, somewhere around LA?
Don’t ask me where cause I don’t know.” Danny closes his mouth.
“Anyway, the whole family’s gonna be there for a week, and Jules is the maid of honor, so she was like, ‘You need to be out of my way,’ and I am not spending all that time hanging out with her dad… ”
Danny listens, grinning, as Matt talks some more about the wedding, and then about Jules’s efforts to find a Division I school with two open coaching positions (“I mean, I’m looking, too, but there’s way more women’s programs and honestly, I’m just gonna go where she tells me”).
“How’s she holding up?” Danny asks tentatively after the job talk winds down. “With, like… everything in the news.”
The doctor was finally arrested in December, but more gymnasts keep coming forward, their stories retweeted and reposted, rumors racing from gym to gym.
If even half of what Danny’s been hearing is true (and he has a sickening feeling that most of it is), then this isn’t going to blow over anytime soon, least of all for the survivors.
“It’s not good,” Matt says grimly. “She’s been having panic attacks, like, every night, and I’m trying to help her and she’s just—” He breaks off, his face contorting. “You know what, I’m sorry, man, I can’t even talk about this right now, I’m gonna fucking punch something. What’s up with you?”
So Danny rambles on about routines and upgrades, pretending not to notice when Matt wipes his eyes on the back of his sleeve; and then, since Matt keeps saying, “Yeah?” like he needs another distraction, Danny tells him what’s been going on with Sasha.
“I don’t think you should take it personally, bro,” Matt advises him. “Moms, like, know what’s up. It’s kinda scary.”
“My mom doesn’t.” In fact, over the holidays, she’d asked him twice when he was going to bring someone home to meet the family. You’ve already met him, Danny had desperately wanted to say, but he’d swallowed every last word. Smiled. Told her he wasn’t serious about anyone yet.
“Yeah, but that’s different,” Matt points out. “Bi people just, like, mess up everyone’s radar. It’s like a superpower.”
Danny forces a laugh, even though it doesn’t feel like a superpower at all. More like a curse.
“Yeah. Maybe. I don’t know. Like, I totally get that he doesn’t want his mom to find out, but like…
he could have told her we were friends? And then it’s like, he barely wants us to meet up when he’s here, and I’m just like…
do you even want to see me?” Mortified by how pathetic that sounds, he rushes to add, “I mean, I know he does, but…”
“Bro?” Matt’s eyebrows almost skyrocket off the screen. “This guy is literally coming to the US to hang out with you for like two hours. I’m pretty sure he wants to see you.”
“Well, it’s for his mom,” Danny points out, and then he tries to explain the Full House thing, only for Matt to cut him off with a snort.
“I don’t care how much he loves his mom, dude, he is not fucking doing this for her.
Are you kidding? Like, okay, maybe he’s being weird about meeting up or whatever, but like…
he’s gay. In Russia. And his mom’s gonna be right there and he’s still sneaking out to see you.
That’s, like, commitment, bro. Hardcore. ”
Okay, when Matt puts it like that… well, shit, Danny feels kind of dumb right now.
But also, actually, a lot better. “Yeah, no, you’re right,” he says, exhaling.
After all, can he really blame Sasha for being cautious?
“I just… I want to see him for more than a couple nights, you know? Like, he’s here for two weeks!
But his mom’s there, so… I don’t know it’s gonna work. ”
“Why don’t you just invite him to coach summer camp?” Matt asks, like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. “And then it’s, like, a business trip. So his mom won’t be suspicious.”
“…Dude,” Danny says after a stunned moment. “That’s, like, so smart. What the fuck.”
Matt laughs, but Danny barely hears him. All his gears are turning now, Matt’s idea just the spark in the ignition he’d needed—and if what he has in mind works out, he won’t even be interrupting Sasha’s vacation time with his mom.
Holy shit, he’s a genius.
Well, Matt is.
But still.
*
Over the next few weeks, Sasha receives a variety of texts from Danny about gymnastics (Ate mat hard today ), Buddy and Luna’s vet visit (pupdate!
!), a nature documentary on Netflix (Oceans are lit), shaving his balls (fresh), a weird-shaped carrot he found in the fridge (Should I eat it?
?), and the US presidential inauguration (My mom refused to watch); but when it comes to the trip, Danny’s unusually quiet, sending only a single question on how much time off Sasha’s allowed to take.
Sasha explains the national team policy—no vacations near a competition, anything else approved at the coaches’ discretion—yet when he asks why Danny wants to know, all Danny will say is that he’s “working on something.”
Danny: But its not ready yet
Danny: Gotta Sasha proof it first
Sasha: ??
Danny:
It’s not until the beginning of February, when Sasha’s preparing for the Russian Championships, that Danny video calls him with a kilometer-wide grin. “I have the best idea ever,” he announces.
Sasha doesn’t need to ask what this is about; his pulse is already racing. “Yes?”
“All right, you’re totally gonna freak out, but don’t, okay? Just, like, listen.”
“Okay…”
“So, you and your mom have your vacation, right? And then…” Danny’s grin somehow gets wider. “She goes home, and you stay with me. And coach summer camp at my gym for two weeks.”
There’s a long silence, Danny practically vibrating with excitement while Sasha translates, blinks, and then retranslates.
“What?”
“Summer camp!” Danny repeats, but when Sasha doesn’t magically understand what that means, he recalibrates. “Okay, you know how we have, like, guest coaches at my gym sometimes?”
Sasha dredges up a memory of Danny hosting Matt the year before Rio. “Yes?”
“So… you can be the guest coach! For two weeks!”
Danny’s talking like it’s a done deal, but Sasha’s already thought of a dozen reasons why this isn’t going to work, none of which seem to be registering in any part of his body other than his brain.
“And all that stuff’s in the morning, so then we can train in the afternoon, and then on the weekends, we can, like, go to the beach, or take the boat out, or go paddle boarding, or, like, whatever you want to do, and then you can meet all my high school friends, like Patty and Jess and everyone, and—oh, dude, we gotta get you some tacos.
I have, like, three different places that I go to, so we can hit up all of them—”
“Danny,” Sasha interrupts, because it’s more than he can handle, translating and trying not to get his hopes up, Danny’s plans unfolding like a storybook in front of him. He wants it all, but—
“You’re freaking out,” Danny says.
“No, I—”
“Sasha, I can literally see you freaking out.” Danny raises his eyebrows, and Sasha blushes.
He’d forgotten, after so many months of phone calls, that talking face to face with Danny is sometimes like being in an X-ray machine.
“Are you freaking out cause you don’t know how this is gonna work, or are you freaking out cause you don’t want to do it? ”
“Because I don’t know,” Sasha answers slowly, confused by the question—and the relief that flickers across Danny’s face, blink-and-miss like a glitch in the screen. Had Danny thought he wouldn’t want to work at his gym?