Chapter 30 Cole
CHAPTER 30 COLE
ADINKRA SAYING: (Abe Dua) A symbol of wealth.
SAMUEL ADDO: What good is the wealth without a wife to nag you for it?
Gray. My entire world was damn gray. Never mind the scorcher of a day blazing outside.
The depression clawed at me… as did my raging hangover. I was my father’s son, after all.
It had been three days since I had blown up my life, and I was wallowing in a self-pitying spiral. It had gotten so bad, last night Tallon had even come by to check on me and ended up crashing on the couch because apparently I was too pathetic to be left alone.
My mind kept replaying the brokenhearted look on Ofos’s face. Instead of standing up for her, I had let myself be talked out of us. By her own mother, nonetheless. And then my mother. Talking to my own mother had only cemented what Ofosua had said. I was a coward. I’d told myself I was doing what was best for her, but I’d caved and I’d hurt her.
In the worst way possible. You abandoned her.
Fuck. I didn’t deserve her. I was a goddamn mess. I needed to talk to her. Hell, I didn’t even know if I could get her to agree to see me, let alone let me apologize.
Seeing her at the office over the last several days had been the purest kind of torture. I thought if I could go to work and ignore the pain, it wouldn’t hurt as bad. Rookie mistake. I knew there would be no recovering from her.
When I stepped out on my terrace, I found Tallon with a cup of coffee. “You know, the espresso machine is broken. So I brought you coffee because I know you’re—Jesus, you look like shit.”
“Wow, thanks. That’s good to hear from you, my best friend, of all people.”
He shrugged. “I’m telling you the truth, man, you look like hell.”
“Thanks, you’re pretty awesome too.”
“You weren’t exactly chatty last night. But I assume your current state of dishevelment is about Ofos?”
I was truly embarrassed to say it out loud, to tell Tallon what an idiot I’d been.
“Her mother came to see me. She gave me an earful about how I couldn’t possibly understand what it’s like to date someone like Ofosua, and about how my family would never accept her, and hers would never accept me, and that the kinder thing to do was to break it off now.”
He cursed under his breath. “And you listened to that bullshit?”
“It made sense. It was the easier thing to do, I guess. And then Mom called. I got another earful about how Ofosua would never fit in with our world. How everyone we knew would look at her and treat her. And that wasn’t what I wanted for her.”
He blinked at me and then he leaned forward. “Okay, you and I have been friends since we were kids. But you are the dumbest son of a bitch I have ever met.”
I blinked. “Well, I can’t argue with that.”
“Shut up and I’ll finish. You fucked up bad. Isn’t this what she’s always telling you, not to take the fucking easy route? You sat there as her mother echoed the things that maybe you’re a little bit afraid of, and you fell right into her trap.” He threw his hands up. “Then Rebecca turned it up a notch.”
I pinched the bridge of my nose. He was right. I knew what I wanted out of my life, how I planned to get there, and that I wanted Ofosua to be by my side. So essentially, I’d pushed away one of the few truly good relationships I’d ever actually had. She made me a better person, and I had walked away from her.
“Anything else you want to say?”
He nodded. “Fucking fix this. You love her. You’re just too dumb to see it yet.”
Tallon left me alone with a lot to think about. Which was good because my mind was spinning, but he kind of gave me the bit of clarity I needed. I decided to go to Ofosua right then and there to talk this out. Maybe we wouldn’t resolve it, but I had to start proving I wanted to.
But when I went to the office, she wasn’t at her desk.
Then my uncle called me into his office.
“Hey, what’s up?”
“The pitch went well yesterday. You were terrific.”
“Ofosua was, that’s for sure. Have you seen her this morning?”
“Take the compliment.”
“Thank you, I guess.”
My uncle smiled. “Your marketing plans were perfect.”
“Thanks. A lot of thought went into positioning. We have a solid plan.”
And then he said, “Your grandfather would have been proud.”
Those fucking words nearly made me choke.
“I appreciate it, but Ofosua was really the reason it all came together.”
He smiled briefly. “If you insist. So, were you going to tell me that you and she were, ah, fraternizing in some way, or you were going to hope I didn’t notice?”
I blinked at him. “Excuse me?”
He leaned forward and planted his hands on his desk. “I’ve seen the way you look at each other.”
I groaned. Fuck. Was I that obvious? “You’re not pissed?”
He laughed. “Hopefully, you were smart about it so we don’t end up with a Me Too situation. Or worse.”
I winced. “Just when I think you can’t be any more out of touch. If we’re finished here, I’m going to go find Ofosua. We need to talk.”
My uncle chuckled low. “I’m surprised she didn’t tell you since you’re so chummy.”
I frowned at him. “Tell me what?”
“She took a job with Brian Cosmos. Her last day was yesterday.”
I blinked at him slowly. “What?”
I had to find her.
Hauling ass, I made it to Greenwich Village in less than twenty minutes. It seemed she hadn’t removed me from the automatic entry list, which was a gift from the heavens. I didn’t bother with the elevator. It would take too long. I raced up the stairs to her apartment and then banged on it like the sound alone was going to get her to answer. Granted, if she knew it was me, she probably wouldn’t, but it was worth a shot.
One of her roommates came to the door. She was pretty, with medium-brown skin and long braids. We’d met before. If I remembered right, her name was Cora.
“Hi, I’m sorry to interrupt. I’m looking for Ofosua.”
She glared. “You know, Hot Cole, I had high hopes for you.”
I winced. “I’m here to fix it.”
She shook her head. “I’m sorry, you’re too late.”
“Fuck, I’ll call her.”
She shook her head. “Nope, she left this behind.”
I stared at the silver iPhone in her hand. “When is she coming back?”
She hesitated. “She’s not. She leaves tonight for LA, and right now, she’s out with Kukua.”
“Do you have Kukua’s number?”
She winced again, fiddling her fingers on the phone. “Yeah, she figured Auntie Helen would be calling Kukua when she couldn’t reach Ofos, so she left it behind too.”
Fuck me. I had no way of getting to her before she left tonight. I was completely screwed.
“Thanks. I appreciate it.”
She sighed. “For what it’s worth, she’s broken up. Like, honestly, a wreck. She cares about you. So whatever you did, you can probably fix it, but you might have to wait until she gets back from LA in a few weeks. From what I understand, the job is bicoastal.”
The easy thing to do would have been to wait, but that would mean weeks to resolve this. I’d be losing precious time. Besides, I really wasn’t doing things the easy way anymore. That’s what had gotten me into this situation. And I had zero interest in going backward. I needed to go to LA, but I was going to need some reinforcements.
OFOSUA
Maybe it was a little bit of homesickness, something that the excitement of the huge leap forward I’d just taken couldn’t stamp out. LA was great, but it was an adjustment getting used to driving everywhere. And the traffic. Don’t get me started.
I’d been in LA for exactly two weeks. Only Cora, Megan, and Kukua had my new number. Each of them could be trusted not to give that number to Cole or my mum.
Brian walked into the office for our weekly Monday meeting with a smile. “Good weekend?”
“Yeah, I explored a little bit. Got settled into my place some more, which is beautiful, by the way. I still can’t believe that’s a company apartment.”
“I wanted to make sure that you were comfortable. And I think that you must be, given the way you’ve hit the ground running. I love it when my instincts are proven right. Which, gotta say, they usually are.” He winked.
What I liked about Brian was that when he said things like this, it wasn’t ever with typical male self-important puffery. No jackass alerts went off in my head. Here was a man who was comfortable with himself. And with me.
He asked about a few scripts I’d read, wanting my take on them. There was so much to learn. I loved it so far. Mostly. Then he asked about Aurora St. James.
“I need to get back to her. She’s hosting a major literacy event tomorrow. I’ll call since I can’t be there in person to show her support. To be honest, handing her off to another editor at Drake still doesn’t feel quite right, but it is what it is. I’ll stay involved any way I can.”
As we worked for the rest of the hour, I thought to myself that I could settle in here, do my work, and be happy. Wasn’t that what I’d always wanted? Still, there were these constant and persistent things that kept weighing at the back of my mind.
Every now and again, I’d thought of my mother. I hated to admit it, but I missed her, even her nagging about how I should be dating the right African man or how to improve my cooking.
The truth of it was, I had never really lived in a possibly permanent way on my own. I’d briefly traveled abroad after college, and then come back and spent six months at home in Ghana at my parents’ house before connecting with Yofi and moving in with him. It had all been so quick. Having this time on my own was freeing but actually a little lonely too.
Not that I would tell my mother anything of the sort.
I would never tell her I missed my old life.
The feeling was worse at night because then I missed something altogether different. I could still see Cole’s smiling face as he danced at Republic Day, laughing his ass off, doing his best to find the beat.
And that was what made the nights unbearable. Missing him, constantly. I wanted the pain to stop, but no distraction lessened it.
That’s because you fucked up and fell in love when you really should have known better.