Chapter 33
Sebastian
Special Consideration
“Don’t fucking touch her.”
Frederick pulled back, a look of surprise on his face. “What, now you’ve got a spine? Zip your pants up and get back to the fucking table.”
I looked from him to Evie. She didn’t know what had gone down just a few minutes before. I wished I could tell her. I’d tried to get information for us, but I was a shit gambler. Shaking my head, I leaned down and lifted Evie off her knees.
“I need to take her to the bathroom.”
I was directed to the toilets and stood outside while Evie cleaned herself up. This part of the basement was down a short hall and relatively quiet. The air was cold and cleaner, not having the smoke directly around.
I—I couldn’t believe it. I was shocked I’d remained hard the entire time.
I’d been so nervous and disgusted and horrified and.
.. I hadn’t wanted to do it, but my body betrayed me.
Having Evie’s full, rosy lips around me was heaven, but the circumstances around it were pure hell.
Fred was right. I was just like them. I was a fucking asshole.
I should have known better than to be so cocky at the table. If it weren’t for the gun pointed at me from behind, I would have taken Evie and run. But I hadn’t been able to communicate the entirety of our situation, and guilt was twisting my insides.
A figure came down the hall toward me, but I didn’t look up. I was too ashamed.
“Good job, Shaw.” Fred nodded. “Tame that bitch now before she gets out of hand like her fucking whore mother.”
I clenched my fists at my sides, forcing myself not to turn and swing on him.
“There’s a hierarchy in Hollywood. You’ve got your executives, your producers, your heads of casting and marketing and whatever else. And then, at the very bottom, is you. You’re just a pretty face that can read a fucking script, Sebastian.
“You learned that early. We tried to teach Lita. She thought she was higher on the food chain than she was. She thought her voice had weight and she could make decisions and calls on things she had no knowledge of. She wanted to be in charge, but no matter how many times she was warned, it never got through her head. Pretty people don’t control this place. We do.” He pointed at himself.
“The sooner Evie learns, the better things will be. You did good, kid.” He slapped my shoulder and turned to go back to the main room. “Oh, and Sebastian.”
I straightened and turned to face him. “What?” I said through gritted teeth.
“We know.” He didn’t need to finish the statement. I heard him loud and clear. “And we’ll make sure the police can’t even identify that little bitch’s body if she tries anything else. I’ll rip her fucking throat open with how hard I use it before her body gets dumped.”
“Is that a real threat?” I snarled, leaning toward him.
Fred stopped smirking and nodded. He furrowed his brow, and his lips settled into a grim line. “Yes, Sebastian, it is.”
I shook my head, grimacing. “You’d make your possible daughter fuck you? You’re sicker than I thought.”
Castle’s brows rose, the surprise that I knew this nugget of knowledge evident on his face. “You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Oh, I think I do. Your friend Dourif sang like a bird before Evie slit his throat.” I stepped forward. “He told us everything. The gang rape, the murder, that one of you is Evie’s biological father. All of it. Evie doesn’t care. She wants you all dead.”
Fred’s eyes had widened, but the more I continued, the more relaxed his face grew, returning to its cold, demanding expression.
“Is that so? I see why you went all in. Well, she better watch herself. She already knows what we can do. She’s lucky you were here tonight to fight for her.
None of us would have been so nice.” He pointed at me, and I almost snatched his finger and snapped it in half.
“Why don’t you come over this weekend? We can talk all about this possible paternity and all that. I just redid my hot tub. Bring your girl again,” he said, his eyes darting to the bathroom door behind me.
“Why? If you think you know something, why not end it now?”
He snickered. “I like a good back-and-forth.”
He left, and I continued waiting patiently for Evie. After another five minutes, I grew concerned and walked into the bathroom. My gaze went straight to the open window above a small table.
I hurried to climb the table and crawl out to find her.
“Evie!” I called as I got to my feet in the grass. Looking around, I found myself on the side of Frederick’s yard. I yelled her name again and hurried to the front. I found her stumbling back to my house, wobbling on her heels, hair knotted and wild from where I’d yanked on it.
“Evie!”
She didn’t look back.
“Evie, please! Talk to me.”
“The power of Christ compels you,” she groaned as I caught up to her.
“Evie…” I sighed. “I was watching The Exorcist,” I tried, but she sniffled loudly.
“Don’t. Sebastian, you—” She put her hand up, and I stopped trying to talk.
I reached her as she made it to my door, and I grabbed her shoulders, spinning her around and gripping her tightly.
“Evie, I’m so sorry. I had to. They were going to...” I didn’t want to tell her what happened at the table. I didn’t want to scare her worse than I was sure she already was.
“To what? Force me to—”
“Yes!” I shouted over her.
She flinched. Sighing, I reached into my pocket and unlocked the door, pushing her gently inside and locking it behind us. I turned to her. “It was either me or one of them. They forced me to place you as my bet.”
“Why?”
The ins and outs of this world, the politics of it all, were so disgusting and vile that I struggled to get the words out. If I told her that I’d tried to get more information about Lita out of them, would she feel guilty? I couldn’t make her feel worse than she already felt, so I shoved it down.
Evie saw my struggle and shook her head. She sniffled again and wiped her tears. “It doesn’t matter. It’s done. Like you said, you used your second free use...whatever. I just want to go to bed. Where’s my phone?” she asked, patting her dress.
“You’re not spending the night alone,” I insisted. “Stay here.”
“Why, so you can do it again?” she snapped.
It was like I’d been punched in the stomach. Did she really think I’d wanted to do that?
I’d been a part of three murders and felt nothing, but the very idea that I’d take glee in what just happened next door? I wasn’t a fucking monster. Those men had deserved it. Evie didn’t.
“Evie, I would never...” I gulped. Maybe I was a monster.
My defenses disintegrated, and guilt swarmed me.
What I’d done to her in that basement hadn’t been by choice, but I couldn’t explain that to her in a way that would paint me as the hero.
I was no hero. I was a fucking coward. “Please, it’s not safe for you to go. ”
Her shoulders fell in defeat. “Fine, but I need to be alone, please.”
I nodded and left her in the foyer, going upstairs to retrieve one of my shirts for her to sleep in. I left it on the bed in the guest room across from mine, then went to my room, where I cried into my hands.
What had I done?
And why had I found some of it so hot?
There was deep shame in my soul for having come. I should have pretended, forced my cock flaccid. Something. My body was all-too willing to let her suck me off in front of that room.
I was trapped inside my head until I heard the shower turn on in the guest room. There was a moment or two of water pouring onto the tile—then came a tortured cry.
I bolted across the hall, my feet moving faster than my brain.
I threw the bathroom door open and found Evie naked, crumped at the bottom of the shower.
I stepped inside, fully clothed, and sat down with her.
Pulling her into my arms, I rocked as she sobbed against me.
I didn’t speak or try to soothe her in any way past holding her.
What could I say? Sorry for forcing myself on her wasn’t going to cut it.
But the fact that she didn’t push me away now told me more than any words could.
The hot water eventually turned cold, and only when her teeth began to chatter did I lean up and turn the faucet off.
I helped her to her feet, then scooped her into my arms, cradling her out of the shower.
I took her to the bed and rushed to cover her with a towel.
She didn’t look my way as she moved into the fetal position.
I peeled off my wet clothes, leaving briefly to get dry boxers, and then lay beside her, pulling her into my embrace.
“Evie...”
“Beep beep, Ritchie.” The words came out strained and cracked from the sobs in the shower.
I did as told and shut my mouth, holding her until she fell asleep.
Eventually, my conscience let me do the same, but before I did, I vowed that now, this wasn’t just revenge for her mother.
I was on a path to avenge Evie as well, and maybe, in the deepest roots of my psyche that I’d pushed down for no one to ever uncover, I was going to do this for me as well.
Lita wasn’t the only one who’d been used and abused by Hollywood. There was a price for fame, and day by day, I was realizing that it wasn’t worth it. I’d do anything to simply live a quiet life with Evie. Maybe, after this was over, I’d leave all of this behind with her.
But not yet. We had a task to finish.
This weekend, at Fred’s little hot tub party, he was as good as dead. Property values be damned.