Chapter Eleven
“The holidays are set up to get you laid. For example: spiked eggnog and mistletoe. And New Year’s Eve is basically just an excuse to get drunk and kiss a bunch of strangers. Need I say more?” - Miss Know-It-All’s Gossip Column.
On Monday morning, Gracie was just buckling Pip into the car seat when her cell phone rang. Smiling at the toddler as she answered, she didn’t even bother checking caller ID.
“Hello?”
“Gracie, it’s Viola.”
Gracie could tell from the tone of her voice that it was good news for Pip, and she hated that her heart sank. “When are you coming to get her?”
“This morning. Her great-grandmother is very excited to meet her.”
“Great-grandmother? Why not her grandmother?” Gracie was picturing a woman with a bad hip, who wouldn’t be able to keep up with Pip, and she didn’t like it.
“Her grandmother couldn’t take her, but her great-grandmother was more than happy to. She has her own house, and has been completely vetted by my department.”
“Well, that’s it then, I guess.” Gracie sounded like a frog, the lump in her throat was so big.
“I know you’ve grown attached to her, and this will be hard, but this is a good thing. She’ll be with her family.”
Gracie cleared her throat. “Yeah, yeah, I know. Do you want me to meet you somewhere with her things, or do you want to come to my house?”
“I think it would probably be easier to meet.”
“Okay, I’ll go inside and pack up her toys and some clothes. Do you want to meet in Buhl in the Ridley’s parking lot in half an hour or so?”
“Sure, that sounds good.”
Gracie ended the call and fought back the tears as she unbuckled Pip. “Good news, sweetie. You’re going to meet your great-grandmother.”
The little girl, oblivious to what her words meant, climbed into Gracie’s arms, snuggling close and breaking her heart without meaning to. Gracie carried her inside, noting the difference in her weight in just two weeks. She sat her down when they got inside, and tucked a stray light brown hair behind her ear.
“Let’s put your toys in this box, and I’ll grab a bag with some clothes.”
Gracie set the cardboard box in the middle of the floor, and Pip started gathering up her toys and putting them into the box. Gracie went into the bedroom and pulled a sparkly pink backpack she’d had in high school from the closet. She put several pairs of footed pajamas and a couple of outfits inside. She’d pay Hope for the clothes she sent with Pip, but she didn’t know what the grandmother had for her.
The diaper bag was packed and in the car, filled with most of what Pip needed, and she realized that this was the most painful thing she’d ever experienced. She had lost her grandfather when she was young, but other than that, her life had been pretty great.
But knowing that in no time at all she might never see Pip again ripped her insides up.
She walked out into the living room and saw Pip holding the stuffed horse Eric had bought her. The little girl’s face lit up as she lifted her arms for Gracie and the tears she’d been holding back spilled over.
Wiping at them rapidly, she picked Pip up and settled her on her hip. Once they were strapped in, Gracie started the car and took the left turn that would take them out toward Buhl. She turned on the Disney soundtrack she’d bought and watched Pip sway from side to side to the beat, her thumb shoved into her mouth as she looked out the window.
Gracie didn’t rush, partly because of the ice on the road, but mostly because she didn’t want to say good-bye.
She pulled into the parking lot of Ridley’s Supermarket and spotted Viola’s car right away. Gracie parked right next to her. She pulled out the CD and snapped it into the case, turning to smile at Pip.
“I’ll be right there, okay? I just have to talk to Miss Viola.”
Pip’s blue eyes were wide, and Gracie wondered if she understood something was different about this drive.
She closed the door and went to the back of the car where all of Pip’s stuff was. Viola joined her and helped load it into her car.
“Viola, I was wondering…do you think her great-grandmother would let me see Pip?”
Viola hesitated as she closed the trunk of her sedan. “I can ask if she’d be open to it, but it might be a good idea to give Pip some time to adjust.”
Gracie nodded. “I’ll get her out if you want to install the car seat.”
Gracie opened the door, determined to put on a brave face for this little girl. “All right, sweet monkey, let’s get out of there.”
Pip wrapped her arms around Gracie’s neck tight. Gracie hugged her back and whispered, “It’s okay, honey. You’re completely safe. You’re going to take a ride with Miss Viola, and she’s going to drive you to meet your grandma. She’s very nice and cannot wait to see you.”
Pip’s grip grew harder.
“And just because you aren’t here with me, doesn’t mean we won’t see each other or I won’t be thinking of you. I’ll miss you every day.”
Viola pulled her head out of the car and watched them grimly. “It’s time.”
Gracie reached behind her neck and loosened Pip’s hands. The minute Viola put her hands around Pip’s waist, the toddler went nuts, screaming and clawing for Gracie.
“It’s okay, Pip. Really.” Gracie’s stomach rolled and twisted as Viola put the little girl in the car, fighting her the entire time. Gracie ran to the other side and opened the door. She leaned across the seat and held Pip’s hand, which the little girl gripped hard. Tear-streaked cheeks and desperate whimpers nearly destroyed Gracie.
The last buckle clipped in, and Viola disappeared out of the other side and shut the door.
Gracie kissed the back of Pip’s hand. “I’ll see you soon, baby.”
And before she completely lost it, she pulled out of Pip’s grip and closed the door.
Viola patted her shoulder as she passed, but Gracie didn’t want her comfort. She stood behind the car where Pip couldn’t see her and watched Viola pull forward and drive out onto Highway 30 and slowly drift out of sight.
Only then did Gracie climb back into her car, and break down, violent sobs wracking her entire body.
* * *
Eric locked the door to Buck’s a little after two in the morning, and pulled his jacket tighter around his body. The wind was really blowing, dropping the already frigid temperature by ten degrees. He was looking forward to getting home to his warm house, crawling into his bed, and going right to sleep. Which was strange, considering sleep usually eluded him after work. Maybe he was finally getting too old for the night shift.
He snorted at himself. If he told his old man that, he’d laugh his ass off. Buck had only really let go of the reins completely about three years ago; there was no way he’d jump fully in again. He filled in every once in a while, but for the most part, he enjoyed the quality time with his wife.
Besides, Eric loved the bar. He was just tired and grumpy. When you worked a job six days a week, sometimes for twelve hours or more, you needed a little vacation.
Which brought him back to Gracie. Technically, he was still giving her until tonight to decide, but he was impatient. He’d already promised not to press his luck. What more did she want, it signed in blood?
Eric climbed into his car and started the heater, blowing into his cold hands as he waited for the air to warm. When he finally could feel his fingers again, he pulled out his phone. Scrolling through his contacts, he stopped on Gracie's name and tapped out a text.
You have sixteen hours, Gracie Lou.
He was just about to put his car into reverse when his phone beeped.
I’m aware of how much time I have left.
No jerk. No ass. What was wrong with her?
Are you okay?
Several seconds passed, and then…
No, I’m not all right.
Eric didn’t bother to write back. Against the advice of every voice in his head warning him not to go over there, he couldn’t go to bed until he found out what was wrong with her.
He drove out of Buck’s parking lot and stopped off at Hall’s for a bottle of something fruity and alcoholic. It was all Gracie ever ordered from the bar. Next, he swiped some brownies from the bakery and headed for the checkout.
Eric felt like an idiot, practicing what he was going to say to her on the drive over to her house. So far, he’d come up with standing on her porch looking cool and holding up the brownies. Then, with a wink, he’d say, “See? I’ll make an awesome fake boyfriend.”
Ten minutes later, he knocked loudly and waited. Nothing. He knocked again, and the door whipped open to reveal Gracie, looking like a toddler in footed pajamas, her eyes puffy and her hair wild. His smile and clever line evaporated.
“What are you doing here?” she sniffled.
“You said you weren’t all right, so I came by to bring you some happy juice and comfort food.” He looked her up and down, and despite his best efforts to be sensitive, his mouth kicked up into a little smile. “You look adorable.”
Sarcasm practically lashed him like a whip. “Thanks, but I’m really tired and not up to sparring with you tonight.”
This wasn’t going the way he had hoped, and before she could shut the door on him, he turned sideways and stepped inside. “I’m sorry about the crack about your pajamas. I really did just want to make sure you were okay.”
Her green eyes filled with tears. “Well, I’m not, and while I appreciate the concern, I think I’d rather be alone.”
He wasn’t used to seeing this side of Gracie, the soft underbelly she only let those closest to her witness.
“I’m here for you, if you want to talk,” he said gently.
Gracie shut the door behind him with a slam. “Stop it! You’re not supposed to be like this. You aren’t nice, or kind, or considerate. You’re…you’re…”
“Shh, keep it down. Aren’y you going to wake up the kid?”
Gracie slumped back against the door and broke down, shocking Eric to his very core. He set the bottle and the container of brownies down on the side table. She was sucking in air between sobs, and without really thinking about it, he reached out to pull her close. He tucked her against him and slid his arms around her, rocking her.
“Is she gone? Is that what’s going on with you?”
She nodded against the front of his shirt, and Eric grimaced. He had no idea what to say to comfort her, so he remained silent and just let her cry. He figured it was the safest move, especially since she was so close to his genitals. One wrong word and she’d probably kick him so hard, he’d be singing soprano for the rest of his life.
“I know I’ve only had her two weeks, but it felt like so much longer. Maybe because I got to spend time with her. Today, though, when Viola took her from me and she cried and reached for me…I wanted to snatch her back.”
“I’m sure you did. Did they find her mom or something?”
Gracie pulled away, wiping at her eyes. Eric kept his arms around her, trying not to notice how good she felt against him. “They found her great-grandma.”
“That’s good, right?”
“Of course, it’s good,” Gracie said, hoarsely. “And I’m sure that she’s going to love her to pieces.”
“But you don’t want her to forget you?” Eric said, surprised by his own intuition.
Gracie sniffed. “No. No, I don’t. I do want what’s best for her. It just hurts.”
Eric ran his hand over her back. “I know it does, Gracie Lou. It will get better, though. And that little girl is going to be the better for knowing you.”
Gracie made a choking sound. “Oh my God, did you just say something incredibly thoughtful and nice ?”
He chuckled good-naturedly. “Hey, I can’t be all bad. You’ve met my mother. She tried to teach me a few things.”
“Tried being the operative term.”
Minutes ticked by as he held her, smoothing her hair, rubbing her shoulders, and kissing the top of her head. He found himself murmuring words of comfort to her, and a thought struck him as her crying slowed.
He hated seeing Gracie sad. He liked her spitting fire or cracking jokes, but when she was in pain, no matter how pissed or frustrated he might be with her, it bothered him. Bothered might be too mild a word, but it was all he had at the moment.
“I tell you what. Why don’t I get you settled into your bed and tuck you in for the night? You can enjoy the brownies and liquor tomorrow.”
Gracie took in a heavy breath. “Sure.”
Eric picked her up, and when she didn’t protest, he carried her down the hall to her bedroom. He walked in and looked around. It wasn’t the first time he’d been in her room, and all the bright colors and fuzzy rugs were still ugly.
“This place needs a man around here.”
She didn’t respond, but he thought he felt a snort of derision against his chest.
He laid her down on the rumpled bed, and when she was snuggled in, he pulled the blanket over her.
Her hand over his stalled his movements.
“Yes.”
He raised one eyebrow, and it took him a minute to realize what she was saying. “Yes, you’ll go to New York with me?”
“If you’ll help keep my mother at bay.”
He turned his hand over and cupped hers, warmth spreading up his arm the way it always did when he touched Gracie. “It’s a deal.”
Eric started to stand, but she didn’t release his hand. He looked down into her wide, swollen eyes and pale face as she cleared her throat.
“I know we said we’d be completely professional when no one else is around, but I…I really don’t want to be here alone. Can you just… Can you stay until I fall asleep?”
Eric knew she was asking him for comfort, but that didn’t stop his cock from having other ideas.
“Sure, I’ll stay.”
Gracie relaxed back against the pink of her sheets, and Eric bent over to untie his boots. He slipped them under her bed and put his jacket on top of her dresser. Then he went to the other side and sank down on top of the comforter.
He stared up at the white, lacy canopy and felt her turn and inch closer to him. Without asking permission, he reached out an arm and pulled her against his side, running his hand over her back. She clicked off the light on her bedside table and snuggled close to him. He could still feel silent tears wetting his T-shirt, but other than her quiet sniffles, it was silent.
“Can you talk to me?” Her voice sounded sad and garbled.
“What do you want me to talk about?”
She took a deep breath, her breasts pushing against his side, and he gritted his teeth as his erection grew.
“Anything. Everything. I don’t care, as long as I’m distracted.”
What he needed to think about was boring sports stats or something disgusting to draw attention away from how soft her body was against him. But the need to cheer her up outweighed his own discomfort.
“All right. Remember when you and Gemma snuck into Buck’s to see Travis’s gig?”
He felt her lift her head up, but didn’t dare look at her. Even in the dark, he knew every curve to her face, and he did not need the aggravation.
“Yeah, when we were eighteen, and you kicked us out about ten minutes after they finished? That the gig you’re talking about?”
He smiled in the dark at her snarky tone. “That’s the one. When you ordered that beer with your fake ID, it was actually a nonalcoholic beer.”
Several seconds ticked by before she choked out a laugh. “God, that’s awesome. I guess I can’t blame making out with Joey Turner later that night as bad judgment brought on by alcohol.”
Well, if that didn’t dim his excitement just a hair… “Joey Turner is a pussy.”
“Yeah, I know. I had to make the first move and—”
“I don’t want to hear about any of the guys you’ve hooked up with, okay?”
“Why? It’s not like you really cared. You thought I was an annoying kid.”
He scoffed. “That’s bullshit. You knew what you did to me, coming by and flirting with me. You were too damn sexy for your own good. I had a hard time keeping my hands off your barely legal body.”
Gracie had started tracing hearts on his chest. “Really? You thought I was sexy?”
“Still do. Infantile pajamas and all.”
She hit him in the stomach and countered, “They are warm and comfortable.”
He grunted and grabbed her hand, holding it to his chest. “They are pink with monkeys on them.”
“I like monkeys.”
“So do two-year-olds.”
She stiffened, and he wished he could call it back. He was sure any second she was going to kick him out and then…
“Tell me about being Miss Know-It-All.”