Chapter 3 A Jew’s confession
A poison apple and a black widow martini gave Leah the courage she needed to tell her mom. After walking out the door of the cocktail bar and hugging Maya goodbye, she picked up her phone and dialed.
“Hey, honey!” Savannah answered quickly and quietly. “Give me a second.” Leah heard the ruffled noises of shuffling and a few whispered “excuse me” before her mom answered again in a more normal voice. “I’m at this month’s book club! We’re discussing My Family’s Survival , have you heard of it? The author wrote it about how her grandmother survived the Holocaust. It’s simply miraculous!”
Leah hadn’t heard of it, but she let her mom rant about how amazing the book was for a few minutes before she said, “I have to tell you something.” As she said it, she texted her mom a picture of the ring on her finger and a picture of her and Gabe smiling with Leah’s ringed finger placed on his chest. “Check your texts.”
“Leah!” Savannah exclaimed. “But who will marry you? A rabbi? Certainly not ours! A priest?”
“We haven’t discussed any logistics yet,” Leah responded to her mother, a pang of disappointment vibrating through her. While her mother hadn’t been happy about Leah’s relationship, she had tried to accept it over the last two years. In the beginning, she’d joked that Leah was sowing her wild oats, but those comments faded over time. Leah even suspected that Savannah might feel a slight affinity for Gabe. After all, he was always the first to help clear the table and offer to do the dishes after a big meal. And he always remembered the stories Savannah had told them about her friends at the temple.
How’s Suzie doing since her cancer diagnosis? What table did you end up at for the Bernstein bar mitzvah? How was the Levine wedding?
Savannah seemed to love that someone was listening to her stories and she was happy enough to fill Gabe in, even if she had to explain exactly what it meant when Noah Bernstein’s voice cracked during his Haftorah portion or how nervous she was that Jennifer would trip when doing the seven circles around her groom because her dress’ train was so long! Gabe listened intently and always asked the right questions.
“Mom, I’d really love it if you could just be happy for me,” Leah said, remembering when she’d gotten engaged to Asher. Her mother had been happy and excited to start wedding planning.
“Well, I am, but…” Savannah said.
“But what?”
“Well, honey, I hope you’re taking this seriously,” Savannah said. “You remember when I told you about my first husband? And how we got divorced?”
“This is nothing like that!” Leah responded.
“Well, it’s not the first time you’ve gotten engaged, so…” Savannah paused.
Leah sighed. She wanted to cry. She knew that being in an interfaith relationship was challenging, but she had thought that her mother had accepted it. She had thought that maybe Savannah saw what a good person Gabe was and that maybe his religion wasn’t the only defining thing about him.
“I support you, honey, but I hope you understand this isn’t going to be easy,” Savannah said.
Leah nodded. She understood. No one ever said marriage was easy, even when both sides were Jewish. But it’s possible she didn’t quite realize how difficult it would prove to become.
And just like that, the high Leah had been feeling evaporated. How could she have been so na?ve to think that this wouldn’t be an issue? Well, she knew it would be, it’s why she had waited two whole days to tell her mother. To tell anyone. Because she knew that the minute they started telling people, that’s when the questions would come. That’s when everyone would poke holes in her happiness with their comments and opinions about their religious differences.
Leah didn’t care about their religious differences. At least, she didn’t think she did. It rarely came up except around holidays when both of them were respectful and eager to learn about the other’s traditions. She also thought often about that couple she had met two years ago at a Shabbat dinner that had told her about their experience navigating their interfaith relationship. They had been so optimistic and had seemed to have it all figured out. Leah wondered what happened to them and if they were still living a perfect interfaith marriage or if they had gotten divorced, a possible outcome that people all too often reminded Leah whenever religion came up.
It wasn’t fair. Nobody mentioned divorce when she had gotten engaged to Asher two years ago. Nobody talked about divorce rates whenever people from Leah’s high school youth group or temple or family got engaged or married. No, at those events, everyone talked about the happy couple and how beautiful young love was. Was Leah’s love not beautiful? Did anyone have faith in their survival?
“You there?” Savannah asked. “I can’t hear you.”
“I didn’t say anything,” Leah said, realizing that she had been quiet for too long for a phone conversation.
“Well, let’s talk about this in person,” Savannah suggested. “Do you want to come next weekend? Bring Gabe, let’s all get together and figure everything out.”
“Sure, Mom,” Leah responded. The suggestion lifted Leah slightly. Maybe her mother was on her side and wanted to support her. This was a good sign.
“I better get back to the book club,” Savannah said. “It’s not great for the VP to be stepping out so long! And I was really interested in the conversation. Can you imagine being in hiding for years? It’s just so shocking that these events occurred less than a century ago!”
Leah said goodbye to her mother and continued walking uptown until she reached the subway entrance. She then hopped on for a couple of stops to get home. It’s funny how home is such a malleable concept. She’d only lived in this home a year, but it felt comforting.
Gabe was sitting on the couch when she opened the door. He was lying back with his feet on the coffee table and a book in his hands. He quickly closed the book and put his feet down when he saw her.
“How was it?” he greeted her when she walked in and sat on his lap, wrapping her arms around his neck for a kiss. “It must have been great for me to get such a passionate hello!”
Leah giggled as she kissed him. She would tell him about her conversation with her mother. But later. For now, she just wanted to enjoy her fiancé and return to the bedroom where they had happily spent the last few days without worrying about whether their wedding would include a rabbi or a priest, or yarmulkes or communions, or whatever other decisions were awaiting them.
The decisions would still be waiting after Leah got her fix in the bedroom. And maybe she would be better equipped to tackle them then.