Chapter 19
Creed
“WHATEVER YOU ASK OF ME, I’LL DO IT.”
“Oh, my God,” Riley laughs as he pulls a compact Polaroid camera from a bright blue gift bag. “Is this for me, Snow?”
She holds up her own and gives it a wiggle. “Well duh, silly.” I watch the two of them from the back seat of Dad’s car as they lean into one another. She’s showing him how to load the film and replace the empty cartridges.
When he made the decision to go, it was the first time I’d struggled to agree with him on something.
I didn’t want to let him go. But it’s what he wants, and I’ll be damned if I don’t support him through it.
Collins and I had stepped out of the room long enough for the doc to look him over one last time and that’s where she and I hatched the plan to get him a camera, too.
We still had a few hours before he was to be released, so I slipped out to the store.
I sent Collins dozens of pictures of all the options before she settled on the one she wanted to gift to him.
I wanted to get him a big camera just like hers, but it made sense to get the smaller one while his hands are still unsteady.
The doc said it could be temporary nerve damage with how tightly his hands were restrained that’s causing the trembling, and the lack of grip strength comes from the gunshot wound.
My boy is so fucking worried that if by some horrible chance he can’t drum again, we’ll just chuck him and leave him.
It only makes me hate his asshole mother that much more.
That bitch is entirely at fault for taking such a perfect, sweet human and corrupting his mind to believe that anyone besides her could ever abandon him.
My love for Riley had begun to shift before all this shit went down, but my feelings haven’t changed in that time. There’s really no denying that I’m head over heels for both Collins and Riley. Deeply, madly, irrevocably obsessed with them, if you will.
The moment Collins gets the camera ready, she holds it out to face us, and we all chuckle before leaning in and smiling. The flash goes off, the camera whirs, and the picture slowly ejects. I pull it from the top and set it in my lap while it develops.
“Here,” I mutter, trying to avoid my dad’s glances in the rear view mirror as I pick up the bright green bag from between my feet and hand it to Riley.
It’s not like my father is judging me, but he’ll absolutely embarrass me by saying something ridiculously cheesy if I even dare to make eye contact. “This one’s from me.”
I keep having these mini flashbacks of watching the grainy recordings Asher had taken of Collins opening her gifts from us before we unintentionally left her completely on her own, setting off the sequence of events that had thrown her already rocky childhood into complete turmoil.
Riley’s sweet, deep brown eyes meet mine. He looks a little confused before he just smiles and tears into the tissue paper that Collins had stuffed into the top of the bag.
He and Collins both bark out a laugh when they see the candy-themed stationary set, complete with wax seals that look like M&M’s.
I pull my own all-black set from my bag and hold it up to them.
I’m smiling like a lovesick fool when I lean into Riley and whisper in his ear, “Now I can write the two of you all the dirty love notes I want.” I nuzzle his neck and chuckle into his skin when his breath hitches and goosebumps bloom across his freckled shoulder.
“Tell you everything I can’t wait to try with you as soon as you get home and are ready. ”
I place a small kiss just below his ear. “All three of us.” Kiss. “The two of you.” Kiss. “And the two of us.”
Dad clears his throat, and when I pull back, I love how Riley is as red as a tomato while Collins is practically panting, her pupils completely blown out with lust.
“Jesus fuck, we’re here,” Dad snaps and all but bolts from the car like his ass is on fire.
“God I can’t wait for that,” Collins whispers, and I chuckle, but it quickly fades when my eyes turn toward the stale-colored building before us.
I have half a mind to shove him back into Dad’s car and take him home as I open the door and move to let him out.
Dad retrieves the two suitcases from the trunk and sets them down as we round the vehicle. I grab my phone to text Bear to let him know we made it to the facility, but a soft gasp gives me pause.
“Collins?” I hear Dad say. When I look up, I see Riley wrapping his arms around Collins and my dad bending down to try to look into her eyes, but she’s not seeing him. “Sunshine, can you hear me?”
“Dad, back up,” I warn him softly when I see her nostrils flaring in anger with whatever she’s seeing in her mind’s eye.
He does so instantly as I take his place, but I don’t touch her.
“I think it’s the trunk,” Riley whispers his hands tightening around her shoulders. “She was fine until she saw the empty trunk.”
I nod, understanding and filing away the fact that trunks are a trigger for her. “I think this is where I…” His voice breaks over the last words. “I was dying in there, and she was left to process it alone and in the dark.”
“Fuck, Ri—“
“It’s okay, Creed, it’s okay,” Riley hushes softly before I can even start to spiral down a dark mental path. “Her breathing has slowed down, so try pulling her back.”
My dad watches in the background in awe as Riley and I slowly coax Collins back to reality with us, using our new mantra mixed with other encouraging words of praise.
He swipes a hand over his mouth and steps away, heading toward the doors of the facility.
“I’m so sorry,” Collins whispers, but Riley and I are already shaking our heads vehemently.
“You didn’t get lost, Stardust. We found you. You’re here, that’s all that matters.” My words are mumbled into her hair as I pull them both into my arms. I hold them tightly until I feel them relax before slowly pulling back to see their faces.
“Of all the fucking places.” Collins flushes, pinching the space between her brows. “I couldn’t keep my shit together long enough to even get you through the door.”
“Hey, it’s alright, baby,” Riley coos, then places a soft kiss to her temple. “There’s no timeline for healing, and there’s no controlling when our thoughts decide to run from us. But we’ll always be here to tug you back when you start to feel adrift. Okay?”
She looks between the two of us and sighs.
“I don’t deserv–”
“I’m not even going to let you finish that sentence, Stardust.”
She purses her lips, and I can see an ember of that fire I love so much sparking deep within her eyes, wanting to argue and fight with me on this.
But today, my fight is stronger than hers.
For none other than the fact that the statement ‘I don’t deserve you’ makes her the fucking silliest of gooses. Geese?
I’ve got my work cut out for me with convincing these two that not only are they worthy of love, but that they’ll never have to live a day where they doubt it either. I’ll spend every damn day reminding them if I have to, and I’ll do it with a smile on my face.
Why? Because they’re worth it.
We all stand in a tension-filled silence, knowing we have moments before we’re going to be pulled apart again.
I’ve offered a thousand different ways for Riley to stay with us, but he’s insistent on this route.
I want to shake the shit out of him—lovingly, of course—but I have to pause and understand why he wants and needs this.
I may have lost my mind while they were taken from me, but they lived in a fucking traumatizing, hellish nightmare for two weeks straight.
Riley feels that he needs this time to heal not only physically, but mentally. He told me about what psych had said about him trauma bonding to Collins. While that may be true, he was already in love with her before all of this happened.
So there’s no path that ends in any other way than the three of us together again.
Dad reemerges from the building with a tall wall of muscle trailing behind him. I meet my father’s eyes and give him a small, reluctant nod, telling him we’re about as alright and ready as we can be.
“This is Wilder, he’ll be the physical therapist working with Riley.”
My eyes widen at Dad’s words at the same time Collins seems to choke on air. Riley’s brows furrow in confusion.
“No Pippa?” Collins chirps, her voice a little clearer today as she continues to heal, her arms tightening around me and Riley because yeah, we’re all totally still cuddle puddling in the parking lot.
Dad gives her a knowing smirk and shakes his head. “No Pippa.”
This is why I love my father. He knew our dislike for her behavior towards Riley, and he proactively removed her from the situation for us. I don’t know how, but I’m not one to look a gift horse in the mouth.
Wilder holds out his hand to Riley, his dark, warm brown skin covered from shoulder to wrist in blackwork portrait-style tattoos.
“I’m Riley.” My boy offers Wilder a small smile and takes his hand. The shake is weak at best, but I can see the gears turning in Wilder’s brain, already calculating how to help him.
“Nice to meet you, Riley.” He smiles back and drops his hand. “I look forward to working with you and getting you back behind that drum set.”
“Me, too,” Riley chokes, but his deep mocha eyes are practically alight with hope.
Wilder claps his hands together, genuine excitement on his face as his smile widens, “I’ll help get your bags inside while you say your ‘see you soons’. We’ll get you well and back home with your people before you know it, man.”
Okay, I like this guy. We all wave him off as he and Dad carry Riley’s bags inside. When they disappear through the sliding doors, Riley turns to us, his throat bobbing as he swallows nervously.