Chapter 1 Allegra
ALLEGRA
Nine Years Ago
"But Miss," Cecilia, my governess, exclaims, following me around as I rummage through my cousin's closet.
"You can't talk me out of this, Lia. I'm doing it," I say as I grab a pair of pants that look like they might fit, considering my cousin is four years younger than me and hasn't completely gone through puberty yet.
"But Miss," she starts, her lip trembling slightly, "your wedding is in two weeks. What if something happens?" I stifle the urge to roll my eyes at the mention of my upcoming nuptials.
"Nothing will happen. I've thought about everything. I will be gone for just one day, and I'll be back before midnight."
"If your parents find out…" She shakes her head, already imagining the worst.
"They won't unless you tell them." Hands on my hips, I turn to her. "They are still in America, and chances are they will only come back right before the wedding." I arch an eyebrow, waiting for her to contradict me. Lia knows my parents couldn't care less about me—they have my sister for that.
"What if Signor Franzè finds out?" I take a deep breath, annoyed at the mere mention of his name.
Achille Franzè is my soon-to-be husband and capo crimini of the Calabria 'Ndrangheta.
A couple decades my senior, he's been my fiancé for the past five years.
I've only met the man twice, though, and both times I'd been petrified of him.
But my parents have been looking forward to this alliance so much that the wedding is to take place the day I turn eighteen—two weeks from now.
When the contract had been signed, the choice had been between my sister and me.
Achille had been ambivalent; in his eyes, any young, virginal bride would do.
My parents, however, had seen an opening to get rid of me and save their precious daughter.
They know that no happiness awaits me after the vows are spoken.
I may dread my future, but I'm also smart enough to know there is no way out.
So many nights I'd made plans—how to run away, get a new identity, and live happily ever after.
But those thoughts are reserved for when I go to sleep, when I can imagine myself living an entirely different life.
The moment I defy my parents or Achille, I'm dead.
I know it, and so does Lia, which is why she's so worried about me. I'm resigned to my fate, but I'm still a little selfish. I want one memory for myself—just one to keep me warm for the rest of my life.
I've never left my village, I've barely had access to technology, and I've never even eaten good food, let alone enough. I've simply known nothing but this bleak mansion that holds both my dearest memories and my deepest fears. Is it so bad to want to experience something else just for one day?
Growing up, books were my only solace. There are only a few Italian titles in the library, all designed to stifle my knowledge and keep me in an ignorant bubble—to convert me into the perfect, idiotic bride.
Most of the books are in English, Spanish, or French.
But my parents didn't count on one thing—my desperation.
By chance, a duplicate title was available in both Italian and English, so I pored over those letters for days, months, and years on end, comparing words and sentence structures until I learned the language.
With difficulty, I switched to other English titles, but the more I immersed myself in this new tongue, the more familiar I became with it. And a new world opened up.
I read about Paris and New York, about fashion and exotic food, about art and history. These were things I knew to be forbidden, yet they delighted me more than anything. Most of all, they showed me how people who are free live. And I became greedy.
The closer my wedding approached, the more restless I became, thinking about the unknown: about the paintings I'd never see, the chocolate I'd never taste, or the music I'd never hear.
That curiosity grew to such a crescendo that I finally cracked.
I studied every single map available and calculated distances and times, all toward one goal: to live, if only for a day.
"He won't. He can't. I've been planning this for one year, Lia. I have the maps memorized; I know the roads inside and out. I can do this. I'll just go to the city early in the morning and come back before midnight."
Milena, the village I was born in and never left, is a couple hours away from Agrigento, formerly one of the largest cities in Ancient Greece—and the home of countless ruins, museums, and restaurants. A short distance away from the sea, Agrigento will cover most of the items on my bucket list.
"But the guards…" Lia shakes her head. I get where she's coming from. She knows the risk I'm taking, but I find myself increasingly reckless just for that one taste of freedom.
"They'll think I'm sick. They won't know I'm gone." Dressed as a boy, I'd exit the house at dawn and ride my bike the whole distance to Agrigento. "Come on, Lia. You know how important this is to me," I add in a pleading tone, trying to sweeten her up. She's been more of a mother to me than my own.
"Won't you get tired? Two hours of riding your bike is a lot when you've never done that before." She purses her lips.
"I've taken that into consideration. Why do you think I've been running up and down the stairs for months now?"
When I say I'd thoroughly planned, I really mean it. Even something as simple as my physical condition, I'd accounted for. I'd risked getting sick from exercising too much without enough nourishment, but it had worked.
"I can't believe I'm agreeing to this. Oh, may the Virgin Mary guard you." She makes the sign of the cross over my body before sticking her fingers in her apron and handing me a few notes.
"Lia…" I stammer, tears gathering at the corners of my eyes. Money… she's giving me money when she has so little.
"You must accept this. Use it wisely, child." I don't let her finish as I wrap my arms around her.
"Thank you."
Although I'd planned everything to a T, insufficient funds were still an issue. I'd resolved to pawn a few gold rings, but now this money would ensure I'm safe even if that doesn't work out.
When the big clock in the grand hall chimes three in the morning, I am ready.
My bag is packed with all the necessities until I make it to Agrigento—maps, money, some food, and water.
I swing the bag over my shoulder and tiptoe my way down the stairs.
The guards should be asleep. Lia had helped me to douse the evening food and wine with valerian.
Their sleep will be uninterrupted, and it will be enough for me to make my escape.
The clothes I'd stolen from my cousin fit me—not surprisingly.
A pair of gray pants, a lanky black shirt, and a white chemise I'd draped over them since the night air can be chilly.
I'd also donned a cap to hide my long hair.
It's hard to believe that an (almost) eighteen-year-old girl would fit into the clothes of a fourteen-year-old boy, but when one has been on a strict diet for the last four years, with almost nothing but clear broth and some vegetables, one tends to be pretty small.
I'd be willing to bet that no one could even tell that I am a girl.
Not when I'm only skin and bone with no shape whatsoever.
Because, apparently, Franzè prefers his women very thin.
Over the years, Lia had snuck me some food here and there, but even that was hard to do, since she wasn't in charge of the groceries or cooking.
My parents had given strict orders that everything fattening should be removed from the household.
There had been a couple of times I'd tried to steal the guards' food, and besides it being an embarrassing experience, I'd been grounded for a week the first time, and a month every time after.
The punishment had been even less food, so I'd quickly learned my lesson.
I make my way toward the back of the house where I'd discovered a hole in the fence. Since I'm pretty small, I can easily fit through the opening.
I push the bag through first before flattening myself to the ground. I crawl forward, and in a few movements, I'm on the other side. Grabbing my backpack, I don't linger and I dash out of the alleyway.
We'd planned everything, and Lia had hidden an old bike in the bushes a few streets down.
Fishing the key to the lock out of my pocket, I unlock the bike and put my bag in the front basket.
I unfold the map and secure it in the basket so I can easily reach for it on the road. Then I hop on and start pedaling.
The sun is coming up, and the light makes it easier to see where I'm going. On the way, I only stop a couple of times to gulp down some water and munch on some food. Even though my legs are hurting, by my calculations, I should be pretty close to Agrigento.
Wiping the sweat from my forehead, I push forward.
Just a little more.
I pedal and pedal, and finally, I can see something in the distance. Buildings start to take shape and my heart speeds up just thinking about it. I'm so close… I blink twice, my eyes already teary with both elation and fear. I need to soak everything in.
Taking a deep breath, I stop and check my map again. An older model, I've already accounted for the fact that it might not have all the new buildings and establishments. Still, I'd made a short itinerary.
I would go into Agrigento, visit the library, go to a coffee shop, and go to a restaurant.
I'd reserved a little time for walking around before heading to the ruins, a short distance south of the city.
Then I'd continue south to reach the beach.
I smile to myself, the thought of experiencing that for the first time making me burst with excitement.
Putting the map away, I settle back in the saddle and continue my journey.
A few miles in, buildings appear on both sides of the highway.
There are cars going in front of and behind me, and for all the novelty of that, I can't muster any fear.
I pedal faster, feeling the warm, chilly breeze brushing past my face, goosebumps appearing on my body.
I increase my speed, breathing in the fresh air.
Free! I feel free!
My lips stretch into a wide smile and I grin like a fool. So many times I'd tried to imagine this… I look right and left and imprint everything on my memory. The sights, the smells, the pure feeling of freedom. I stock it all up, knowing it's limited.
The highway winds down into multiple smaller streets, and I follow the exit marked on my map. Going down the hill, the buildings become more crowded together, creating an urban feeling I'm entirely unfamiliar with.
My village is simple, and aside from my family's house, which could be considered the most ostentatious in the region, the rest of the houses are modest, the roads small and unkempt. As I keep pedaling, I'm amazed at the different architectures, the colors of the buildings, and some of their sizes.
Given that I'm on my bike, it's quite easy to abandon the main street and go down alleyways.
Just like the streets, they are narrow, going up and down and following the shape of the hill—making my journey even more tiring.
Keeping to the marked road on my map, I traverse a few alleyways, heading straight for the city center.
Sparing a glance at my watch, I realize I've made perfect time—it's almost eight in the morning.
I pass by a few shops, and their schedules all show they open at nine.
I'm a little disappointed because that's an hour unaccounted for in my schedule.
I'm feeling panic creep up, so I take a deep breath.
I've got this!
I jump off my bike to walk, leading it by its handles. Making my way to the historic center, I stop when I reach a church. I look for a comfortable spot and sit down. Taking out what's left of my food, I eat while watching people come and go around the square.
It's so foreign… The more I stand there, the more people I see. I don't think I've ever seen so many people in my life. It's like I'm entranced as I watch them go about their day, probably going to work.
When it's almost nine, I shake myself from my musings and ask around for a pawn shop. I'm directed to one not too far from me, and I'm successful in selling the gold rings for quite a bit of money.
This should definitely be enough for one day.
Everything settled, I look at my bucket list. What should I do first?