Chapter 9 Allegra
ALLEGRA
I hold myself still, my palms sweating over the steel of the gun.
I can do this!
But I can't. Not really. I'm just a regular girl, one who's never even been in the outside world until today. And now? I suddenly have to deal with so many things I'd never thought possible.
Starting with the handsome devil. My lips curl in disdain the moment I think about him and his suave tactics. I'm pretty sure he'd expected me to fall to his feet and worship him. I'd seen his smug expression when he'd thought he had me and how it had dropped when I'd gained the upper hand.
I might not have been out in the world much, but I know his type well. He's just like my family and my future husband—a bully who gets off on intimidation.
I'd resolved not to give him the satisfaction of getting to me, and so I've been on my guard at all times.
And now? I stare with incredulity at the gun in my hand, still hardly believing that this is the reality I find myself in.
And whose fault is it?
Pursing my lips, I shake my head and try to focus. Will it make a difference if I die now instead of an hour ago? The way things are going, I must be fated to meet my end today.
"Ready, little tigress?" he asks me, and I give him a nod. That nickname again. If I'm going to die today, I wish he'd at least stop calling me that. It just makes my skin crawl.
A shiver goes down my back at the thought, and I remind myself to keep my head in the game.
I take my position at the window of the vessel and Enzo starts his maneuvers. The ship quickly shakes as he turns it around to evade the enemy. We're gaining speed, and for a moment I feel giddy, the wind in my face, the chilly night making me feel.
But then I open my eyes and see the other ship right behind us, the distance shrinking by the second. Just as they get closer to our boat, a storm of bullets starts raining down on us.
"Little tigress," Enzo calls out, his voice tense.
I will my trembling hands to obey and settle my fingers on the trigger. Tuning everything out, I focus on the incoming ship and I shoot.
"That's it. You can do this, little tigress," I think I hear him say from behind, but I don't stop. Maybe it's the adrenaline, or maybe I suddenly want to live, but I keep going. I don't know if I hit someone, and I try not to think about actually killing a person.
No, this isn't me harming another human being. This is me defending myself and, by extension, the handsome devil.
A smile stretches across my lips even through the height of my concentration.
He will have to thank me.
The thought of having this proud man bow down to me makes me even more determined to do a good job.
The gun is soon out of bullets, and I quickly pick another one up, continuing to shoot at them.
"This isn't working," Enzo mutters under his breath, and the boat makes a sudden move to the right, almost making me lose my balance.
"What's happening?" I yell at him, my fingers still on the trigger.
"We're getting hit." He pauses, turning to me. "I don't think the boat will last much longer." Just as the words are out of his mouth, the sound of an explosion makes me trip, and I back away from the window.
"What..." I start, my eyes wide as I catch sight of a fire.
"Shit! This is exactly what I was worried about. They fucking hit the reservoir." He pushes a few buttons before standing up.
He takes a box out of his pants and opens it to reveal a ring.
"Who would have thought this little thing would bring me so much bad luck," he says, shaking his head and pursing his lips. Reaching inside his shirt, he takes out a necklace, quickly slips the ring on the string, and puts it around his neck.
I just stand there watching him, the sound of an engine approaching becoming louder, with more and more bullets hitting the boat.
"Here," he says, coming around, undoing my vest, and taking it off me. I stare at him, but I can't find it in myself to react.
What's going on?
Before I know it, he's slipping another vest over my arms—a life jacket. He does the same for himself before taking my hand and leading me to the edge of the boat.
"Do you trust me, little tigress?" His green eyes glint in the moonlight, and in my shocked state, I just nod.
"Didn't expect that one," he chuckles, bringing me to his chest and holding me closer.
"I'm sorry for this. I really am," he says right before jumping into the sea.
We hit the surface of the water hard, but the jackets keep us afloat. Enzo's arms are holding on to me tightly as he starts swimming away from the boat.
"Why?" I croak, the cold of the water already affecting my body.
"It—" His words are muted by a huge explosion, debris flying into the air and into the water.
Enzo cradles me closer and shields me with his body, turning me away from the burning vessel.
"How did you know?" My words come out as a whisper as I stare at the flames engulfing the boat—or what's left of it.
"It was only a matter of time," his voice is grave as he answers, his gaze focused on the slowly departing ship.
"They left… just like that?"
"Maybe the ring wasn't what they were looking for. Maybe they just wanted to kill me," he says playfully, and I want to smack him. How can he even think to joke at a time like this?
Using my elbow, I push against him, but the current of the sea keeps me from actually injuring him.
"And now I'm going to die too. Because of you. Thank you very much," I add dryly, but I'm brave enough to note the irony of me coming closer and holding on to him.
He knows how to swim.
Yes, indeed. That's the only reason I'm clinging to him, my hands wrapped around his neck, my face inches away from his.
I raise my eyes to see him watching me intently.
"I guess you're meant to die in the sea, little tigress."
"Will you stop calling me that?" I grit my teeth, amazed at his ability to annoy me even when my body is slowly shutting down.
"Indeed. I should call you little sea lion now, right?" He smirks down at me, and I close my eyes, defeated.
"I'm sorry," he finally says, and his hand comes up to my face, fitting his palm to my cheek. My teeth are already chattering, and he's not far behind me.
"You know we're going to die here, don't you?" I ask him, my tone serious this time. He nods, his expression closed off.
"Let's call a truce, shall we? Let's not die as enemies," he says, stroking my hair, his face suddenly tender.
"But that's all we are, isn't it? We've been at each other's throats for hours now."
"Is that all we have to be?" His thumb circles across my cheek and over my pruney skin.
"Fine." I release a breath. "I can pretend… for a while." The ghost of a smile appears on his face, and it triggers a smile from me too.
Here we are, in the middle of nowhere and surrounded by the vast sea. Maybe we can pretend, now, right before death, that we are something more.
"What's something you've always wanted?" I ask suddenly.
"Me?"
I nod.
"I've never thought about that. I've always had everything I wanted," he states with a frown.
"Everything?" I raise an eyebrow.
He's pensive for a moment before answering.
"Someone to trust."
"You've never trusted anyone in your life?" My tone betrays the disbelief I feel at his statement.
Even with my parents and my isolation, I'd still had Lia, and she's had my confidence since the beginning. I can't imagine not having anyone to trust.
He shakes his head, a rueful smile on his lips.
"All the riches in the world don't give us what we crave the most."
"And what is that?"
"Your turn now," he deflects, and I pout, put off that he didn't answer. "What's something you've always wanted, little tigress?" His hand is still on my face, and using his thumb, he tips my head up so I'm looking into his eyes.
"Freedom," I simply state, and his pupils seem to grow bigger.
"Freedom…" Enzo repeats. "And what would you do with freedom?"
"Be whoever I want… eat whatever I want, dress however I want, marry whoever I want," the words spill from my lips as wetness accumulates in my eyes.
There's enough water around, I don't need to add more.
But I can't help myself. Not when I realize I'll never be able to do any of the things I'd dreamed about. If they had seemed inconceivable from my gilded cage, they are now impossible—death the only outcome.
"Shh, don't cry," he wipes a tear from my eye, slowly bringing it to his lips and tasting it. My mouth opens in an O, the gesture entirely unexpected.
"There's freedom in death too, you know. In the way you leave behind all your worries," his finger continues to softly caress my cheek, "all your fears. Who knows, maybe it's not even the end."
"Do you think so?" I'd read the scripture and followed the guidance of the church because that was expected of me, but I'd also tapped into the Ancients.
Maybe because of my circumstances, I'd empathized the most with Heraclitus' teachings—everything flows.
For if everything changes, then I too would become something else and escape my current condition.
"I can't claim I know," his mouth pulls up in a cheeky smile. "But I'll let you know soon."
Maybe it's because we're nearing the end, but even his bad jokes can't get on my nerves anymore.
"Heraclitus," I take a deep breath. "We are and we are not. Maybe it's not death… just change," I whisper, and the intensity in his eyes seems to swallow me whole.
The sea is restless as the waves carry us, our bodies fitted to one another, our breaths mingling in the darkness of the night.
"Change… I like that. But he also said that fire is the essence of all things, and this," he nods towards the sea, "is extinguishing our fire."
For the first time, I laugh. I throw my head back and laugh, and I hear Enzo joining me.
"We should aim to feed the fire, lest it die," he comments, and I don't know what he could possibly mean.
I can barely feel my feet anymore. Even my arms are losing sensation. I stare at Enzo, his lips purple, his skin pale.
We're almost out of fire.
"How?" I don't care what he says as long as it takes my mind off our impending fate. And for a moment, I'm glad he's here with me—we're not alone as we stare death right in the face.
His thumb swipes across my lips, parting them.
"How about a first kiss? A direct one this time?" My eyes widen at his words, and my heart starts beating loudly in my chest.
Wait. I'm dying. It should slow down.
I shove my rational self to the side and let my spontaneous self take the reins. Because the fire bit might be absurd, but my curiosity is not.
"OK," I say, and he seems just as surprised at my quick acquiescence. "But after this, wherever we might go," I wave with my hand toward the sky, "remember I still don't like you."
"Have it your way, little tigress. Now shut up and let me kiss you."
He cups my cheeks in his palms and brings my face closer to his. Our eyes meet, and for a second we just stare at each other, the cold, the shivering, all falling away.
I lick my lips instinctively, and his gaze lowers, zoning in on them.
I try to mentally prepare myself for this milestone, but then I feel the pleasant pressure of his lips on mine and all other thoughts leave me. I gasp and he deepens the contact, his tongue sneaking into my mouth, his inner heat meeting mine.
Fire. We're making fire.
I hold on to him even tighter as I angle my head to give him better access to my mouth.
Everywhere is freezing, but not where our bodies are touching in the most intimate way.
The stroke of his tongue against mine sends shivers down my back, and this time it's not because of the ensuing hypothermia.
I give myself over to this sensation.
Who would have thought we'd fit so well? Two people who can't stand each other but are quite good at stoking the flames.
He ends the kiss, his lips still moving softly over mine.
"Maybe if we'd met under different circumstances…" he drifts off, and a light suddenly shines on us. We both squint as we look toward the source, a fishing boat coming toward us.
"What?" My mouth hangs open in shock.
The boat stops by our location, and two men help us out of the water. They wrap us both in hypothermia blankets and tell us they'll get us to a hospital.