Chapter 33
Chapter
Thirty-Three
GRIM
One hour earlier
“Do you think she’ll show up tonight?” Sin asked, pouring himself a drink.
“We can only hope,” Chaos murmured, settling back into an oversized armchair.
“She can find us, right?”
“Of course she can,” I said before bringing my drink to my lips. “It doesn’t matter where we are—a chateau in France, Blackwood, or even here in Lilith’s secret fight club. Merri can pull us to her dreams.”
Sin glanced around the room Lilith had given us.
Modest, clean, and large enough to house four hulking horsemen, she’d provided us with the essentials and nothing more.
Apparently Pan had snuck in the brimstone whiskey on one of the supply runs.
When he and Sunday were safely returned to the group, I’d have to thank him.
“Now we simply wait.” Malice paced back and forth, his words not matching his attitude. He was on edge for more than one reason, and rightfully so. I wasn’t a father, but if my child was missing, no matter how old he was, I’d be a bloody menace until he was found.
“Chaos—” I spun to ask him a question, but it died on my lips when I found him slumped backward, a soft snore leaving him.
“Well, I guess that answers that,” I murmured, my disappointment palpable.
Once again, she’d selected one of them over me.
I shouldn’t be surprised. I deserved it. But it still cut deep.
“Thank fuck,” Sin said on a relieved sigh. “I knew she wouldn’t wait too long.”
Malice briefly closed his eyes before pushing to his feet and joining Sin at the bar cart. “She’s hungry. She can’t wait much longer.”
“And she loves us.” Sin beamed as he said the words with such certainty.
The desiccated remains in my chest gave a savage lurch at his words. I was fairly certain Merri’s silence where I was concerned proved just how untrue that sentiment was.
This is what you wanted. You needed to push her away. To save her.
Then why does it hurt so much?
“Against her better judge—” Malice began, but his eyes rolled back in his head, and he and Sin both crumpled to the floor, their glasses shattering as they hit the stone.
“Ah, looks like she was successful at bringing multiple people into the dream with her. That’s my girl.”
I smirked at their undignified sprawls, secretly enjoying the discomfort they’d feel when they returned. Then I settled in and waited to join them.
Any second now.
Any minute . . .
Annnny minute . . .
A pit formed in my stomach as time ticked by. She called them to her. She needed them. That meant she needed us. Us meant me as well.
Didn’t it?
Why would it?
You denied her time and again.
The truth of my fall from grace hung heavy around me. I’d had her so briefly, but for those fleeting moments, I’d finally known true happiness. But the reality of our situation meant anything lasting was impossible.
And yet.
And yet . . .
I missed her with a hunger so fierce it damn near rent me in two.
The others believed her, so why couldn’t I? Why was it so hard for me to entertain the idea that fate might have granted the four of us our perfect mate?
Because your kind are unworthy of happy endings.
I tapped my fingers on the arm of the chair, my thoughts chasing each other until one rang out so loudly I sat up straight from the force.
So become fucking worthy.
Shoving to my feet, I raked a hand through my hair and took a heavy breath. I’d sat idly by my entire existence, waiting for my time to come, only entering situations when Death was needed. Not any longer. Not when I could do something to help.
“Gabriel,” I thundered as I left the room and stormed down the hall.
Unfortunately the angel did not miraculously appear at my summons. Several heads turned my way, though.
“What are you looking at?” I snapped, annoyed by the judgment and pity I found in their curious gazes.
Though the latter emotion might have been a bit of me projecting. It’s not like anyone here knew me.
I pulled my leather gloves from my pocket and slid my hands into them just in case I needed to shove someone out of my way.
“Everything all right?” Hades called, standing off to the side with a dark-haired vampire I vaguely recognized.
“Where’s that troublemaking angel?” I demanded, moving to join the twosome.
“You’ll need to be more specific. We have a handful of angels in our ranks these days,” the vampire said with a barely there smile, his Irish accent tinged with something close to amusement.
As my eyes landed on him, that sense of recognition deepened. I knew this man. And not just because he was part of the rescue party that came for us at Iniquity.
“I’m surprised to see you here. I recall greeting your soul.”
Caleb’s lips twitched. “You’ll have to take that up with Gabriel. He gave it back.”
“As I said, troublemaker.”
Hades let out a low chuckle. “It was more like he gifted it to your mate, Caleb. Don’t twist things around. Gabriel isn’t in the business of just handing things like souls out willy-nilly.”
Caleb shrugged. “There were a lot of moving parts to my resurrection.” He narrowed his eyes at me, clearly attempting to comb his memory for a recollection of me. “I don’t think we’ve met.”
“We have. You won’t remember me, though. The souls I claim rarely do.”
Caleb looked between the two of us. “How does it work between the two of you? Don’t you technically have the same job?”
Hades and I exchanged a knowing glance. We got this question frequently when we were together.
“He reaps them and then passes them on to me for judgment and sorting.”
Caleb nodded as though he followed, but it was obvious he had more questions than answers. Most did when it came to all things death and afterlife.
“And you need Gabriel now? To what end?” Caleb asked.
“I have questions I suspect only he can answer for me.”
At first I worried the two of them might stop me, that perhaps they’d keep me from the angel due to my occupation, but Hades gave a sharp jerk of his chin to the left. “He’s probably in the witches’ greenhouse. He’s been spending time there since we brought him back.”
“I think you mean hiding there,” Caleb murmured.
“Hiding from who?” I asked, still woefully out of the loop when it came to the dramas of our new allies. Not that I much cared, but knowledge was a powerful weapon.
“His brethren. Michael and Evander have been around. Gabriel doesn’t want to talk to them,” Hades explained. “Think he’s got a bit of a chip on his shoulder because they didn’t come to his rescue.”
That I could understand. My brothers hadn’t been pleased with me since Merri left, but for centuries the four of us kept our distance for reasons too complicated to name. She had brought us back together. She was the reason for so many of the good things in my life.
“I see,” I murmured, then gestured toward the greenhouse with my head. “I’ll be going now.”
I didn’t wait for either of them to respond before turning and heading away. I did catch their parting remarks, though.
“Is he always like that?” Caleb asked.
“What do you mean?”
“Abrupt. Demanding. Ungrateful.”
Hades snickered. “That was Death on a good day. They call him Grim for a reason.”
I resisted the urge to turn around and offer a retort. It wouldn’t achieve anything, and honestly, a lifetime with Sin taught me there was power in silence. Silence was as much a statement as anything.
The moment I rounded the corner and saw the greenhouse, something in me lightened.
It had been too long since I’d been able to cultivate my own plants.
A pang of loss struck my chest for the rooftop greenhouse I’d used as a personal sanctuary, destroyed by demons, ruined by this pissing apocalypse I was supposed to usher in.
Pushing my way inside, I paused briefly just to breathe in the familiar scent of dirt, fertilizer, and life. Just that quickly, a sense of calm descended, and a little of the weight I’d been carrying dropped away.
“I see you’ve stumbled upon my hiding place,” Gabriel said.
My eyes snapped to him, and I fought back a smile. The vampire had been right.
“It’s not a very good hiding spot when everyone knows where you are.”
Gabriel shrugged. “Usually it’s enough not to want to get on my bad side.”
I nodded my agreement.
“What brings you here, Grimsby?”
“I need information.”
“Don’t we all?” He snapped shut the paperback he’d been reading and tucked it into the interior pocket of his leather jacket. But not before I caught the title: The Sinner and the Priest.
Cocking an eyebrow, I muttered, “Interesting genre for an angel.”
“I heard that. Judge not lest ye be judged. Now what information could I possibly provide?”
“You’re familiar with our plan to weaken Lucifer?” I asked as a way of gauging how much background he required.
“By bringing him to the dream realm? Yes, I’ve heard.”
I ran a hand along my jaw, weighing my next words. “I suppose I’m wondering what the best and easiest way to weaken him is.”
Gabriel peered at me. “Isn’t that what your Merri is for?”
“So she’s nothing but bait? Cannon fodder? Something you designed to take him down regardless of the outcome for her?” Anger burned through me.
There was a lot of talk about angels and demons, often placing angels on the side of the heroes, but they’d just as easily sacrifice a living being for their own gain as a demon would. Perhaps they were no better.
“To be clear, I did not design Merri any more than you did. I am not in charge of fate.”
“No, you’re just the Messenger.”
Gabriel glared at my snide tone, but simply said, “Yes.”
“He will kill her once he realizes what she’s doing.”
“Perhaps.”
Releasing a heavy breath, I reined in my temper and tried again. “Isn’t there a scenario where we can do the heavy lifting for her? Where we can trap him, or I don’t know . . .”