Chapter 41
JULIET
The second Roderick pulls the keys from the ignition, I jump him. Lightning fast, I have my seat belt off, and I’m climbing over the center console to straddle his lap.
The wolf accepts my onslaught with wide eyes and parted lips. Those are what I aim for, sealing my mouth over his.
Claiming my man.
I moan, loving the taste of him. He’s better than pie. And I would know, seeing as how I had three pieces tonight. Which is Roderick’s fault because he brought a variety and I wanted to taste them all.
But none compare to the baker himself.
“Juliet.” He groans my name against my lips, fingers digging into my hips, pressing me down against his hardening cock.
The sensation brings on a rush of power. For the moment, I’m taking up every bit of his focus. He’s homed in on me. Saying my name. His body tight with arousal because of what I’m doing to him.
So, why am I still thinking about Monica?
Because they have a past and you refuse to give him yours.
Can he accept never knowing all of me?
I rest my forehead against Roderick’s, panting as our combined lustful heat fogs up the windows.
“You want to be with me, right?” Shit, I hate how that just sounded like a plea.
“Fuck yes.” Roderick runs his nose up the side of my neck, breathing in deep.
“Even with Monica in town?” And I didn’t think I could sound any more pathetic.
Roderick pauses. “Are you jealous?”
Despite my human categorization, I find myself growling, “Yes. She brought you éclairs!”
A chuckle rumbles through his chest as strong hands stroke my back. “They were soggy. Inedible. Couldn’t even choke one down.”
“Liar. They were delicious.” Even with all the pie, I had one and hated how lovely it was.
“Juliet, look at me.” His hot palms cup my cheeks, forcing me to meet his eyes. “We had a lot of good food tonight. But there’s only one thing I’m craving.”
“What’s that?”
“The taste of your pussy on my tongue. You gonna give me what I want?”
Suddenly, I’m damp between my legs. That sure as hell sounds like a ringing endorsement.
And I’m tempted—oh-so-very tempted—to accept the offer. But I realize that sexy is not the type of connection I’m looking for right now. Later, definitely. But now, there’s another step I want to take.
After spending the afternoon with the Jamesons and the rest of their Thanksgiving guests, I couldn’t help the ache of longing that started up in my chest. It wasn’t the most conventional gathering, but I loved it all the same.
Because it felt like family. Something I’d been missing since my grandparents passed away.
Something I was searching for when I stumbled into Bear Valley.
Something I still long for, even after escaping my hellish past.
But how could the potential family in Pine Falls ever truly accept me without me accepting them? My continued fear of werewolves is starting to feel bigoted, and that’s not the person I want to be.
I need to show Roderick that I can be strong. That I can care for every part of him.
“I’ll give you what you want,” I murmur against his ear, “but you have to give me something first.” After a quick nip to the lobe that his him groaning, I lean back. “Change for me.”
At first, Roderick looks confused. He glances down at his rumpled dress shirt, then meets my eyes.
I watch as understanding pierces his arousal.
“Into my wolf?” His question is almost breathless. Somehow vulnerable.
And why shouldn’t he feel that way? When I saw his eyes go black the first time, I had a panic attack.
But I wasn’t prepared then, and I am now.
I can do this.
“Yes. I want to know all of you.” I cup his cheek, stroking my thumb over the curve. “Will you show me?”
He swallows deep, then nods.
Carefully, I open the truck’s door and slide from his lap, mourning the loss of warmth from between my legs.
He’ll be back there soon enough, I remind myself. Be brave for a bit, then claim your man.
Down the road, I spot Hester’s luxury car in her driveway.
She left the festivities before we did, claiming she had had enough interaction with others to last her a month.
Despite her standoffish attitude, I’m glad she came.
It felt nice to have her unwavering presence in the house full of rowdy werewolves.
Roderick steps up beside me, and I reach out to twine our fingers together.
“Would doing this out back work?” I ask.
He nods, silent and tense. When he doesn’t say anything, I decide to take the lead. The fact that I’m the one bringing this about, coaxing him into transforming for me, brings on another rush of that power I feel when I straddle Roderick’s lap.
This is happening because I want it to, not because anyone is forcing it on me.
When Cory first showed me his other form, I wasn’t scared. Shocked, sure. Baffled, you betcha. But up until that point in our relationship, he’d never done anything to hurt me.
And when he changed that first time, there was a part of me that thought, I knew it! I knew there was magic in this world!
For a while, I loved the novelty of Cory’s wolf and the fact that I got to be in on the secret. I was one of the special few who got to peek behind the curtain and view the spectacular hidden nature of our world.
But then things changed.
I think the first red flag, though I didn’t notice it at the time, was when I met Cory’s half-brother, Larson. The guy might have been older than Cory by two years, but he gave off the air of a younger brother seeking approval. Which might have been because the man was fully human.
The way Larson acted around Cory was a strange kind of hero worship. It was only after Cory started getting rough with me that I saw the way Larson would flinch when his brother made a sudden move. Doesn’t matter if you’re a big, tall human. A werewolf will always be stronger.
The change in Cory didn’t come like the flick of a switch, but rather like the boiling of water. Small things that built bigger until I was trapped without having felt the water grow scalding against my skin.
One of the ways he hurt me was with his wolf. A side of him that had at first filled me with wonder, he slowly twisted into an object of fear.
Another in a long list of reasons to hate him.
Now I want to rediscover that wonder I once had.
Carefully, I step over a broken section of the fence. Damp grass crunches under the sneakers Tanya was kind enough to let me borrow for the evening.
The world around the two of us is dark and filled with the soft noises of the forest at night.
In any other case, I might fear this partial blindness, but my wolf’s hand in mine lets me enjoy the beauty of this haunting setting.
Once we circle my house, we find the partially full moon cresting over the trees. The dim glow helps my eyes to adjust.
“I’ll sit here. You take your time.” I let go of Roderick’s hand, giving him an encouraging push toward the center of my yard before I move to sit on the top step of my back porch.
The wood is old and warped, plucking at threads in my sweater dress. Chilly air raises goose bumps on my legs, and I rub my hands over my thighs in an attempt to warm them.
“You sure?”
At Roderick’s question, I flick my eyes back to him, finding the man methodically removing his clothes.
Maybe we could just go straight to my bedroom …
No! I need to do this. I want to do this.
“I’m sure.”
He nods, then tugs off his boxer briefs, standing before me completely naked. Though his muscles are tense, I don’t think the cold is bothering him in the slightest.
Roderick stares at me for another moment, and I watch his chest expand on a deep, bracing breath.
The air around us starts to feel heavy, and I spy the familiar shifting of shadows.
Don’t freak out, I coach myself. This is Roderick. He won’t hurt me.
Darkness clings to his skin, enveloping him. My ears itch from the shift in air pressure, and I reach up to rub them. Then, just like riding a fast-ascending plane, my eardrums pop. The inky cloud around Roderick dissipates.
And I stare into the eyes of a wolf.
Air stutters in my throat.
Roderick. Roderick. Roderick, I chant to myself to stave off potential panic.
And then, because I’m not sure it’s working, I let his name spill out.
“Roderick. Roderick. Roderick …”
Maybe it’s the mantra, or maybe it’s the fact that I watched him turn, but my mind doesn’t overlay a memory of my ex on this moment. Instead, I’m able to sit still, breathing steadily, if a bit heavily.
Roderick the wolf takes a seat, keeping a good ten feet between us, waiting to see what my reaction is.
He and Cory may be the same species, but the differences between them become clearer every day that passes. They don’t even resemble one another in this form.
Cory was a light gray, like the ash from a campfire.
Roderick is almost black, his coat barely distinguishable from the shadows that surround him.
Also, Roderick is bigger, which gives me a perverse kind of pleasure that has a smile tugging at the corner of my mouth.
Wolf Roderick tilts his head, and I reach out a hand as an invitation for him to approach.
When he stands, I spy a hesitant wag in his shaggy tail. The friendly gesture eases my nerves even more as he trots up to me. The animal version of my man snuffles my hand. Then, without further encouragement, he presses his wet nose against my neck, smelling me.
“Gah! Your nose is like ice!” I make a half-hearted attempt to shove him away, but Roderick doesn’t budge.
Instead, he lays his massive, furry head on my exposed thighs.
Warmth radiates from him, and the chill of the night flees in defeat. Surprising myself, I let out a sigh of contentment. My fingers delve into his thick fur, and he rumbles out a happy wolf noise as I scratch behind his ears.