47. Ana
CHAPTER 47
ANA
T he next day, I wear my favorite work outfit over bold, red lingerie. Not that I plan for the men to see my underwear, necessarily; I just want the confidence it gives me.
My nerves are fluttering around like a moth stuck in a jar, and I’m trying to figure out how, when, and where to tell Derek and Jansen that I’ve fallen for them.
Telling them the next time we have dinner together makes the most sense, but what if they don’t feel the same way?
It would be unbearably awkward saying goodbye and leaving in that situation. Or they might convince me to stay and carry on with what we’ve been doing, and while that wouldn’t be terrible, it would hurt a lot in the long run.
The office doesn’t seem like the best place to talk about my feelings with them, but I know I could keep a brave face there if I’m rejected.
I mull all of this over on my ride in, and just after I park my car in the lot, my phone rings. It’s an HR director I met through a professional association, and I have flashbacks to the trap I set for Charles when the woman tells me she’s calling about a job opening.
“I remember you saying your contract was only for six months, and I figure you must be job hunting now,” she says.
I should be job hunting, but I’ve been dragging my feet, and I know the reason is that I’m going to miss seeing Derek and Jansen every day. On the other hand, when I get another job, I’ll be free to date them without violating any rules. If they want to date me, that is.
Another reason I haven’t looked for my next job yet is that I really like working at Community Bean. I knew the position would be a challenge and would boost my resume, but I never expected it to be as enjoyable and fulfilling as it has been. Even the coffee is better than I thought!
But, my contract is almost over, and I can’t stay and carry on banging my bosses several times a week.
“We’re creating a deputy director position,” the woman says. “You don’t have quite as much experience as the title might typically require, but the work you’ve been doing at Community Bean is very impressive, and I think you’d be a good fit.”
“Oh, okay. Thank you. I’m definitely interested, but I still have a month left here.”
“I can work with that, but I’m hoping you might be able to start sooner.”
“Are you offering me the job?”
“I am. This new position reports directly to me, and you’re the first person I thought of.” She proceeds to tell me more about the opportunity, and I can’t help but think that this is the universe looking out for me. This is exactly what I need to separate my personal and professional lives, and the timing is close to perfect.
“I’ll think it over, though I’m definitely very interested. I’ll also see what I can do about bumping up my availability.”
As I take the elevator up to the office, I’m thinking about this new discussion that I need to have with Derek and Jansen. I don’t expect them to have an issue with me leaving before my six months are up. I don’t have any big projects left. I’ll just need to find my replacement, but I’m caught up on staffing in other areas.
I decide there’s no time like the present, so before I even go to my own desk, I head over to the executive offices. I take it as another sign from the universe when neither of the men are on calls and amazingly, they don’t appear to be stressed this morning.
“Do you have a few minutes to talk?” I ask Jansen, and then Derek.
Jansen follows me over to his partner’s office and closes the door, which immediately gives me a tingly feeling in my belly, but I do my best to ignore it.
“Everything okay?” Derek’s eyes search my face.
“Yes … things are good actually. I just need to talk to you about my future plans.”
Two sets of brows lift. Derek, who’s come around to stand in front of his desk, leans back against it, while Jansen stays near me. “As you probably know, the end of my contracted time is coming up in a month?—”
Jansen’s brow furrows. “Your what?”
“You’re not under any contract,” Derek says.
“Well, not an official contract, but a six-month term of employment is what we agreed to when I started, and I wanted to talk to you about it, because I just received a job offer this morning.”
Neither of them speaks for a long moment, but the way their expressions change tells me that whatever they’re thinking isn’t good.
“We assumed you’d be staying on,” Derek says finally .
Now I’m the one looking confused. “Why would you assume that?”
I’m on the receiving end of two frowns, and this time, I’m definitely taking it personally.
“You understand why I can’t stay on here, don’t you? Though I’ve been grateful for the opportunity, I’ve never stopped feeling like I got this job for the wrong reasons. What I’ve been doing with you is highly unethical, and the only way I manage to sleep at night is because I remind myself this position is temporary.”
“Still? That’s still bothering you?”
The irritation in Derek’s voice catches me off guard and before I can address it, Jansen cuts in. “You’re not taking the other job.”
“What?” His abrupt command hits me so hard, I actually stagger backward a step.
“You already have a job here. Turn down the offer.”
“Are you actually serious right now?” Telling me to unbutton my shirt is one thing; dictating my career path is quite another.
“Dead serious, Ana.” His tone is ice cold, while his eyes burn with an intense fire.
I look to Derek, wondering if he’ll be a voice of reason, but he’s just watching us with a grim expression.
“You can’t tell me what to do, and not that it concerns you at all, but I’ve been offered a good opportunity. There’s no reason I should pass it up.”
“No reason?!” Jansen’s voice booms so loudly that I nearly miss the knock at the door.
There’s another knock before it opens and Gloria sticks her head in. “Derek, Jansen? I’m so sorry to interrupt you, but your eight o’clock is still waiting. She says she’ll need to leave in fifteen minutes.”
“Shit! I forgot about our appointment.” Derek’s eyes dart to me, then Jansen. “I’m sorry, but we’ll have to finish this conversation later.”
Jansen looks as if he’s about to protest, but instead, he snarls and follows Derek out the door, only after shooting me a look filled with anger and edged with hurt.
Sympathy and regret flare up—maybe I didn’t handle this the right way?—but those soft feelings are quickly overshadowed by irritation and indignation.
He had no right to talk to me that way, no matter how he feels about me leaving.
I readjust my bag on my shoulder and stalk out of Derek’s office, avoiding Gloria’s eyes when I pass by her in the hall.
Jansen wants me to stay, and deep inside, I’m pleased about that, regardless of whether it’s for personal or professional reasons. It’s nice to be wanted, but not when he thinks it’s okay to treat me like that .
And why does he care so much about whether I stay or go? They’ve told me they’ve been happy with my work here, so I’m sure they don’t want to have to find yet another new human resources manager.
Or will he miss me when I leave, like I’m going to miss them? Though I’m not going to miss him nearly as much if he thinks he can boss me around like that.
And Derek isn’t innocent in this. Even though he wasn’t issuing commands, he completely disregarded my ethical concerns, though maybe it is laughable that I still consider myself to have professional standards after all I’ve done with those men.
My head is in a gray fog by the time I reach my office, so I don’t even notice the white box on my desk until I pull out my chair and sit down. When I finally see it, I don’t know how I overlooked it, because even though it’s similar, it’s quite a bit larger than the previous ones.
I haven’t received any more mystery gifts since Charles was arrested, so I’ve been assuming that the dolphins must have been from him, but apparently, I was wrong.
The box is wider, but much flatter than the others—not a shape that would typically hold a figurine. Maybe it’s something that hangs on a wall? I pick it up and find that it’s fairly light.
As I’m about to open it, Owen steps into my office. “Good morning, Ana.” His cheerful tone sounds like a foreign language after my morning meeting with Derek and Jansen.
I do my best to match his energy. “Good morning, Owen.”
“What’s that?” He nods to the box in my hands.
I search his expression for any hint of recognition. “You don’t know?”
His brows lift. “Should I?” Then, after a beat, he says, “Oh, is that another one of those mystery gifts you mentioned?
“I think so.”
He steps closer, his eyes shining with curiosity. “Do you think it’s from a secret admirer?”
My shoulders lift and fall. “I guess so? I don’t know what else to think.”
“Well …if you do have a secret admirer, I’d better get ahead of things.”
“What do you mean?” Just as I ask this, and just as his probable meaning dawns on me, Jansen appears in my doorway.