Chapter 11
CHAPTER ELEVEN
RAFE
I waited until seven a.m. before going next door to bare my soul to Jaci. After banging on it for a good five minutes, when she finally opened it, my breath left me. Lord, she was a stunner. Eyes flashing, hair tousled, she fumbled with her sweater, pulling it closed over her full breasts.
Focus Rafe. You’re here to talk, not to get her back into bed.
“What’s going on? I thought today was the big day?” Her gaze cautious as she looked over my shoulder toward the moving van. She didn’t invite me in; instead, she wrapped her arms around herself, leaning against the doorjamb.
Well, I deserved that. She’d drawn a clear line. Her sister was long gone to her office, and Simon would be up soon for school, so I needed to get everything out before we were interrupted.
Blowing out the tension I’d been holding in, I just went for it.
"My long-term plans after the service never included a dog. Or you. Or a kid with a gazillion questions. I’ve lived my life just fine, predictable and uncomplicated until recently.
Until the day you barged into my garage—all mama bear, eyes flashing, arms akimbo, hair flying as you skidded smack into my heart. "
No longer sleepy-eyed, I had her full, if shocked, attention as I continued. “I always thought my parents’ relationship was the exception, not the rule. Hell, do you know how many marriages I've seen crash and burn over the years?
She shook her head, but the numbers didn’t really matter. So I pressed on.
“You are what I’ve been racing toward since that first day, from the very first moment.
You were a shock to my system, but a good one.
You woke me the hell up. At first, I couldn’t figure out what this new constant buzz was that ran through me whenever I thought of you or near you meant.
But now I know. It was a signal. A signal telling me that the person who’s meant for me had arrived. ”
“You and Simon are what’s been missing in my life. And with the help of a good friend, everything became clear.” I paused, giving her a chance to say something, anything.
When she just looked at me without giving away what she was thinking or feeling, I shoved all my doubts aside. The worst thing she could do was tell me she didn’t want what I wanted. But I wasn’t leaving until I’d bared my soul and given myself this chance with her.
“I’m done putting up walls, Jaci. Done with the worn-thin excuses I’ve used. And I’m over believing I can’t have a relationship that lasts longer than the time it takes to put my clothes back on and slip out the door.”
I was ready to say more, and then I saw tears pool in her eyes. When the first droplet fell, before she could wipe it away, I leaned down and kissed her cheek, tasting the salty tear as I gathered her into my arms.
Crooking a finger under her chin, I held her watery gaze and finished my confession.
“I should have never let you sneak out of my bed the other morning. I should have asked you to stay instead of lying there faking sleep as you quickly dressed. With each article of clothing you put back on, I let any chance of being truthful with you slip away. It was a coward’s way out, and I let my old habit of indifference overtake any good sense I had. And I’m sorry.”
Her jaw dropped, and her lips formed a perfect O, but no words followed. God, I hoped that was a good sign.
“You barreled into my life, and shook me to my core, Jaci. How could I trust my feelings for you when I’d always believed I was broken?
And yet, I couldn’t stop thinking of you every minute of the day.
And then every time we were together, like the night your car died, or on the back deck in the middle of the night?
My inner voice screamed at me to stop questioning myself and just allow our connection to grow.
To accept that there are things in life that don’t have to make sense or follow a prescribed schedule. ”
Heart in my throat, I made the final leap. “I’ve fallen fast and hard for you, Jaci Cain. I love you. And I haven’t been able to eat, sleep for days. I can’t leave without letting you know.”
“Who are you right now, and what have you done with Major Lucas?” Jaci croaked.
“He’s officially retired and now just Rafe. Come with me? You and Simon. The three of us—well, four counting Duchess—we can start something grand together.”
The sound of pounding feet reached us seconds before Simon burst into the front room, a huge smile on his face. “You didn’t leave?” Wiping the remnants of sleep from his eyes, his lop-sided smile filled his face. “Hey, you’re hugging my mom.”
“Yeah, buddy. How do you feel about that?” Jaci buried her head against my shoulder. I wasn’t sure if she was trying to hide her tears or what until I heard her sigh and felt her arms winding around my waist, drawing us closer.
Suddenly, Simon’s opinion about his mother and me being together became just as important as Jaci’s answer to the question still hanging in the air. I’d never been so damn nervous in my life.
“Well, I guess…yeah, it’s okay.” Simon scratched his head. “Wait, does that mean you like each other? Like more than just friends.”
“Well, that’s why I’m here instead of on my way to Idaho. I just told your mom that I think of her as more than a friend, but I’m still waiting for her to tell me how she feels about me.”
Simon walked over to us, stopping next to his mom.
His expression was a bit confused until something seemed to dawn on him and his eyes went wide.
“Are you guys gonna get married? Whoa, does that mean Duchess would be my dog too, huh?” He started hopping from one foot to the other.
“Mom, tell him. Please, I wanna know too because this is turning into the most awesomest day ever!”
Jaci lifted her head, tears now steadily falling onto her lovely face.
“Yeah, Mom, make it the most awesomest day ever. Please?” I mimicked, putting all my emotion behind the words.
Simon’s blessing put me one step closer to getting everything I never thought I wanted but now couldn’t see myself living without, Jaci and her son.
“You going to keep us in suspense or are you going to meet our demands?” I teased.
“I’ll make it even better. Today will be the bestest-most-awesomest day ever because I love you too, Rafe. And Simon, if you really want this too, it means not only will you get to live with Duchess, but it means moving again.” His enthusiastic whoops and hollering were answer enough.
Jaci turned her attention back to me. “Right? You’re asking us to move with you to Cedar Ridge?”
“I’m not looking for a long-distance relationship if that’s what you mean.
I’m all in, Jaci. But there’s still one thing I need to hear before any other decisions are made.
Actually, it's something I want to hear again. What you said to me the other night when we were, uh…together.” Simon was still busy celebrating to understand what I was really referring to.
Jaci in my bed, screaming my name and then saying she loved me. That’s all I wanted to hear now. Three little words.
She was blushing, her tears had stopped, a twinkle now in her eyes. Then, lifting onto her toes, she kissed me. Kissed me until Simon started making gagging sounds. Laughter ended our kiss, but I knew there’d be plenty of time for more. Later, without a certain eight-year-old hanging around.
“I love you, Rafe.”