Chapter Twenty-Four Odette
Chapter Twenty-Four
Odette
The last thing I want to do after the last twenty-four hours is party.
But here I am anyway, walking into the wedding I planned. A wedding that’s not happening. A wedding that has now turned into a liberation celebration.
According to Izzy, it was all her idea. She didn’t want to waste all my or her brother’s hard work, and I absolutely love her for that. She just got her heart ripped to shreds yesterday, had her whole future snatched away from her, and she’s worried about us.
That kind of selflessness is what started our friendship in the first place years ago, which makes what happened to her yesterday an even harder pill to swallow.
I have never been so mad at someone before. It’s why I let Noah land punch after punch. I wanted to jump in and join him, but he’s had a lot more practice at it than me, so I let him be.
The ride back to my apartment was brutal. I’ve never seen Izzy cry so hard before, not even when her grandfather on her dad’s side died, and it killed me that I couldn’t hold her through it.
Which is exactly what I did when I finally got her into my apartment. I sat on the couch next to her, and I just let her cry. She went through two boxes of tissues before she finally came up for air.
Then she ranted. And ranted some more. Just when I thought she was done, she kept going. I don’t blame her one bit. If I were her, I would still have things to say.
I do have things to say. To Noah.
I’m just not sure I’m ready to face him yet, even though I miss him more than I’ve ever missed anyone else before.
So badly that after Izzy finally fell asleep around 2:00 a.m., I had to give my keys to Beans, who then took them right under the couch with her. I was too tempted to drive out to the farm and see Noah one last time.
My nervousness to see him is exactly why I’m walking into this party thirty minutes late.
Well, that, and I am horrible at being on time.
“Odette!” my mother calls out, making her way through the packed barn toward me.
She wraps me in her arms, hugging me tightly, but it’s nearly impossible to focus on that.
“What are you wearing?” I ask when she pulls away. It’s a lavender dress with puffy sleeves that went out of style nearly twenty years ago and detailing that’s just as tacky, yet it looks vaguely familiar.
“Oh? This old thing? I found it in the back of my closet. This is what I wore to your aunt Collette’s wedding.” Ah, so that’s where I remember it from. “Can you believe it still fits?”
She twirls, showing me the back. It doesn’t fit. In fact, it’s only zipped up halfway, but it still looks great on her.
“Why are you wearing it, though?”
“It’s a party, isn’t it? Figured I’d dress up for the occasion.” She winks at me.
Hmm. Weird. But I suppose she’s right.
I opted not to wear the maid of honor dress Izzy had picked, swapping it instead for a simple black one that hits just above my knees. It’s minimalist and something I’d probably wear to a funeral instead of a party, but since I feel like that’s where we’re at anyway, it’s fitting.
“Well, it looks great. Is Nonna here with you?”
“Yes, dear. She’s right over there.” She points to where she came from, and I spot my nonna sitting at a table with all my aunts surrounding her.
Each one of them is wearing something more ridiculous than the last. Krista is wearing a lavender dress similar to my mother’s. Rita wears an all-white pantsuit—a veil covering most of her face. Collette has on a cream A-line dress and a big, matching floppy hat.
Then there, right in the middle, is my nonna, wearing a wedding dress. An actual wedding dress. One I know quite well from old photos. It’s the one she wore when she married her first husband.
They look so silly and out of place, yet somehow exactly like they belong.
What in the world is going on?
“That dress sure is . . . something.”
My mother giggles. “Isn’t it? I remember swearing up and down as a child that I would never wear something so gaudy at my own wedding.” She leans in, her hand up to her lips as she whispers, “Mine was way worse.”
She’s right. It was worse. I’ve seen the pictures of that too.
“Best friend!”
I turn just in time to catch Izzy in my arms as she launches herself at me.
She’s wearing her wedding dress too.
This one makes a little more sense, given what this day was supposed to be, but still. I don’t understand how she’s not curled up on the couch with a tub of ice cream. That’s precisely where I want to be after what happened with Noah, and we weren’t even officially together.
“How are you?” I ask, my eyes searching hers. I haven’t seen her since she left this morning. She said she was going for a walk and never came back. I called her six times before she finally picked up and let me know she was okay and told me about this party.
“Miserable.” She smiles brightly, contradicting her words. “But this party is helping—my liberation celebration!”
Several people around us cheer, raising their champagne flutes into the air.
Those were supposed to be for the toast, congratulating the new bride and groom, and now here they are celebrating her singlehood.
“Come on,” she says, dragging me farther into the barn I spent so long working on with Noah. “Come enjoy the fruits of your loom.”
“Don’t you mean labor?”
“Bah.” She waves at me. “Whatever.”
I wonder briefly how many drinks she’s had tonight, but then I remember what she’s been through and realize it doesn’t matter. I couldn’t blame her either way.
I wave to Lucille, Jody Ann, and all my other cousins on the way through.
Peaches shakes and shimmies, a cat I’m sure is going home with someone else tonight in her arms. Brian swings Lydia around on the dance floor to a song I recognize, only there are no lyrics, and I’m just so utterly shocked by how happy everyone seems.
I’m also shocked by how amazing this place looks. I tried to contact the rental companies this morning about deliveries, but nobody returned my calls. I figured when they hadn’t called back, it meant they had gotten my messages.
I wanted to drive out to the farm to make sure none of them had arrived anyway, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. I was too afraid to run into Noah.
I’m still too afraid to run into him.
But I can’t focus on that now. The only thing I’m focusing on is how amazing this place looks.
The chairs and tables are set out exactly as we had planned, with tall fake candles in the center of each surrounded by flowers. Upon closer inspection, they aren’t the white, soft blue, and peach arrangements of calla lilies, lisianthus, roses, and sunflowers I had ordered.
No, these are dahlias, gerbera daisies, roses, hops, and celosia in shades of autumn. While I love all those types of flowers, it’s not at all what Izzy wanted.
Shit. I can’t believe they messed that up so badly, and I’m actually relieved I didn’t have to deal with that disaster during a real wedding.
Big round Edison bulbs surround the exposed beams, giving off soft and low romantic lighting. But for some reason someone has hung something off them. I press to my tiptoes to get a closer look, and it takes me a moment to realize what I’m looking at, because it’s so poorly crafted—a paper crane.
“What the . . .”
“Come on,” Izzy says, still dragging me along.
We pass the dessert station, and it’s impossible not to notice that it’s filled with fritters, cupcakes that look eerily similar to the cotton candy ones from For Goodness Cake, and peanut butter M&M’S instead of the delectable cream puffs, gorgeous chocolate-covered strawberries, and macarons I had ordered.
These are all things that I love.
In fact, there are many things around this barn that I love, from the floral arrangements to the paper cranes and even the band playing Taylor Swift’s instrumental tunes.
I don’t know how, but I know instantly who was responsible for this.
Noah.
I skid to a stop, and Izzy nearly bounces back to me like a rubber band.
She looks back at me, tipping her head to the side, a lazy grin on her lips. If it weren’t for the fact that we’re surrounded by all my favorite things, I might believe that grin is because she’s clearly had one too many ciders tonight.
“Izzy . . . what’s going on?”
Her grin kicks up higher. “Why, whatever do you mean, Odette?”
“Come on. Don’t bullshit me. I—”
“Oh, is that the card you’re going to play? You don’t want me to bullshit you? Really?”
And in that instant, I know.
“You know,” I say softly, the words nearly a whisper. She nods. “How?”
“Because you two are completely obvious, that’s how. Plus, Noah confirmed it for me this morning when I went to see him.”
She went to see him? I want to ask her how he looked. Are his eyes as tired as mine from a sleepless night? Is his hair a wreck like he’s been running his hand through it? Or was he perfectly fine, nothing out of place?
“He looked like shit, in case you were wondering.”
I exhale, though it doesn’t make me feel any better. I don’t want him to look like shit. I don’t like that he’s hurting, especially not when it’s my fault.
“Are you mad?”
She giggles. “That’s the same thing he asked.” She pinches her fingers together. “Just a teensy bit mad, but only because you didn’t tell me.”
“But you said—”
“That it would be gross if you two got together? Yeah, that’s because it is gross. But my love for both of you eclipses that. I just want you happy. That’s it. End of story.”
She beams at me, and a weight I didn’t realize I’d been carrying lifts off my shoulders.
She wants us happy. I want that too.
“Odie.”
It’s one word. Two syllables. But they send a shiver right down my spine.
I close my eyes. Not because I don’t want to see him, but because I’m scared to. I’m afraid that once I look at him, I’m going to regret walking away from him even more than I already do.
I’m scared that I might do the most reckless thing ever . . . and tell him how I really feel.
When I open my eyes, Izzy is still grinning at me like a fool.