Chapter 14 Paige
Chapter 14
Paige
“Breathe, Paige,” I whispered to myself. “Breathe. It was just a dream.”
I was standing in the hallway with my back pressed against Grayson’s closed bedroom door. I felt like an idiot after fleeing his room like a frightened mouse, and I was trying to convince myself that what had just happened was no big deal.
But it wasn’t just a dream. It was a dream about my best friend.
The details of it were foggy now, but I was certain Grayson had been there. And, despite the fact I was now wide awake, I could distinctly remember the feelings. Nerves. Excitement. Breathlessness. I felt hot and was still sweating a little, but there were also faint shivers shooting across my skin. Even though I couldn’t recall it clearly, I knew for sure this was not the kind of dream you were supposed to have about your closest friend.
The funny thing was, these sensations weren’t totally new. I’d also felt the same nerves and excitement when I’d flirted with Gray on the ice earlier in the day. Right now though, it was a lot more intense.
Maybe that was it; all the flirting practice had messed with my head. Plus, I’d been lying in Grayson’s arms, watching a romcom. It was no wonder he’d managed to sneak his way into my dreams. It was nothing unusual. Nothing to worry about. Right?
My phone buzzed again, breaking the silence in the hallway, and I glanced down at the screen. I’d already missed the first call from my mom, and she hadn’t waited more than a few moments before trying again. She wasn’t kidding when she’d said she’d be checking up on me, and I’d been getting at least one of these calls a day. I knew she wouldn’t quit until she got hold of me.
Still, I didn’t answer right away; I didn’t want to disturb anyone. The house was unusually quiet, so I crept through the hallway and down the stairs. I poked my head into the living room and found it empty, so I collapsed onto the couch.
While I’d been searching for a private place to take the call, the buzzing had stopped. Mom didn’t hesitate to try again and this time, I answered immediately.
“I asked you to do one thing, Paige,” she said as soon as the call connected. No “hello, Paige, how are you?” just straight down to business.
“I received an email from your career counselor,” she continued. “You didn’t attend your appointment with her last week, did you?”
Ugh. I’d gotten the email too, but I’d been hoping Mom would be too busy with work to check for emails from school. Or that perhaps by some miracle the counselor had decided not to inform my parents. It was seriously wishful thinking, since my mom practically had the woman on speed dial.
“Sorry, Mom. I totally forgot.”
She released a heavy sigh. “You can’t just forget these things, Paige. This is important. Especially since you missed the jobs fair a few weeks back.”
“Yeah, I know.”
“You need to start focusing on your future.”
“I know.”
Another drawn-out sigh came down the line. “Clearly, one week without me and your father is derailing you even further. I told him he needed to reschedule his trip so one of us was at home. But would he listen? No...”
It sounded like my mom was about to launch into yet another rant about the failings of my father. And to be honest, I didn’t blame her. He was addicted to work and had been for most of my life. My mom wasn’t much better though. I suspected that was the only reason their marriage worked. They were both too busy to realize our homelife was a shambles.
“I’ll have to see if I can get out of my meetings next week and come home sooner,” she said.
“No!” I almost shouted, then quickly calmed myself. “I mean, you don’t have to do that. I’m sorry for missing my session with the counselor, Mom. It really was an accident. I know how important your trip is. Please don’t cut it short for me. I won’t miss my next appointment, I promise.”
The other end of the line went quiet for a moment. “Okay,” she finally said. “It’s been rescheduled for Wednesday at ten a.m. Make sure you’re there. The decisions you make now will affect your whole future.”
No pressure, Paige. It’s only your entire life that’s on the line if you don’t choose the right pathway now. Such a cheery thought to end the weekend on.
“I’ll be there,” I said.
“Good. I’ve got to make another call, so I’ll check in with you tomorrow. Good night, Paige.”
“Night, Mom.” The words were only halfway out of my mouth when the line went dead. My mother had a true talent for making me feel like crap, even from hundreds of miles away. I closed my eyes and took in a long breath before releasing it as slowly as I could, trying to push out all the negative vibes that were now prickling my skin.
“You okay, Paige?”
I opened my eyes to see Grayson’s dad had entered the living room. He’d been out all evening helping someone with an emergency tow and must have only just arrived home.
“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you frown before,” he added.
I sighed. “Clearly you’ve never seen me around my mom.”
He sat on the couch opposite me. “Want to talk about it?” He said it so gently, I knew I didn’t have to tell him anything if I didn’t want to, but he was also giving me the space to vent if I needed. I wished my dad was more like Danny Darling.
“She wants me to make a plan for my future,” I explained. “But I have no idea what I want to do with my life.”
“Ah.” He nodded. “Well, it’s never a bad idea to have a plan. They don’t always work out, but it can help point you in the right direction.”
I knew that Danny, like his sons, had been a hockey player with hopes of playing professionally. Everyone always said he was destined for the NHL, but that dream came to an end when he injured his knee in college. He’d ended up working as a mechanic and now he owned his own garage. It wasn’t his original plan, but it was easy to see how much he loved what he did .
“How did you decide you wanted to work with cars?” I asked.
“I’ve always liked them,” he replied. “And I’m good at fixing things, so it all came quite naturally.”
“And what about Amy?” I asked. “Did she always want to be an accountant?”
“I don’t know about that.” He chuckled. “But she always had a knack for numbers, so I guess it made sense.”
“That’s my problem,” I explained. “There’s nothing I naturally excel at. Nothing I feel truly passionate about, the way you do. I’ve been working through a list of things this year, trying to find something I’m good at, but I swear I’m hopeless at everything.”
“I find that hard to believe,” Danny said. “You’re pretty good at talking to people.”
He wouldn’t be saying that if he’d seen my display with Damien on Saturday night.
“You make Grayson smile,” he continued. “Which is a near impossible task. And you’ve always been great at finding the good in not-so-good situations.”
“Not sure my mom would approve if I told her I want to make a career out of chatting with people, being positive, and making Gray smile,” I said.
Danny laughed. “I suppose not. But don’t discount those qualities either. They’re skills you can use in lots of different careers. It’s great you’ve been trying new things, but don’t put too much pressure on yourself to have it all figured out today. You’ve got plenty of time. ”
“Do I? I’ll be graduating soon, and I haven’t even started applying to colleges. I just don’t want to make the wrong choice and be stuck somewhere I don’t want to be.”
“College is just part of the journey,” he said. “And it’s about more than helping you get a good job. Just choose somewhere you think you’ll be happy, and then enjoy the ride.”
“You think?”
“Of course.” He smiled. “Sometimes, when you stop looking ahead and focus on what’s right in front of you, that thing you’ve been looking for all along finds you.”
I felt my shoulders relax, and I smiled across the room at him. “Thanks, Danny.”
“No need to thank me, I’m just saying it how it—” He was distracted as the ceiling lights flickered and he released a heavy breath. “I really should get around to checking out those faulty wires.” He gave a quick shake of his head and stood. “But not tonight. It’s getting late and you should get some rest. You won’t solve your problems by staying awake fretting about them.”
“No, probably not,” I agreed.
I was feeling slightly more optimistic about them anyway. Danny’s attitude was so different to my parents’. They made me feel like the world might end if I didn’t have every little detail of my future planned, while Danny made it seem as though everything would work itself out, one way or another. I wasn’t sure who had it right, but I was hoping it was Danny.
I left the living room and made my way back upstairs. But as I approached Cammie’s room, I couldn’t stop myself from looking toward Grayson’s door. A part of me wanted to go back into his room, lie down next to him, and finish our movie, but the sketchy fragments of my dream were still floating through my mind. Too scattered to piece together but clear enough to stop me from moving closer to his door. Whatever this was, I needed to sleep it off. Fast .
“You look like crap,” Parker said when I entered the kitchen the following morning. “Bad night’s sleep?”
Despite Danny’s advice, I’d lain awake far too late. My mom’s words had played on repeat in my mind, and I was nervous that sleep would bring more inappropriate thoughts about my best friend.
I stifled a yawn and tried to smooth down my hair. It had gone a little crazy overnight thanks to all my tossing and turning, and the bathroom had been occupied this morning, so I hadn’t had a chance to shower and wash my hair yet. I usually needed the fresh spray of hot water to clear away the final dregs of sleep.
“I slept just fine, thank you, Parker.” I reached over and swiped the box of cereal from his hands before taking a seat on the stool next to him at the kitchen counter.
He grinned brightly at me. “Paige Price, are you actually... grumpy this morning?”
“I’m not grumpy.”
“Ha! You totally are.”
I cast him a stern look, which only made his smile grow.
“This is amazing,” he said. “Who would have thought our little human rainbow was capable of turning into a dark and stormy cloud?”
It was far too early for this. “I’m a person, Parker. Not a cloud or a rainbow.”
“You’re definitely closer to a rainbow than a person. At least, you usually are.”
I knew I should have just stayed in bed until the shower was free.
Amy bustled into the kitchen and kissed Parker on the head. I had to smother a laugh because he looked appalled by her gesture. He didn’t complain though. That was one thing about the Darling boys that most people would never believe—they were always so sweet to their mom.
“Morning, Paige. How’d you sleep?” Amy asked as she grabbed the pot of coffee and poured some into a thermos.
“Fine, thanks.”
“How about you, Monkey?”
“Monkey?” I glanced at Parker, whose face had turned from disgruntled to horrified.
“Don’t call me that.” Parker glared at his mom before turning to me. “She doesn’t call me that.”
“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about, Parker,” Amy said. “I’m sure Paige won’t tell anyone you’re still my cheeky monkey.” She ruffled his hair and left the room with her coffee before Parker could argue any further. He looked like he wanted the ground to open up and swallow him.
“I’m suddenly feeling a little more rainbow-like,” I said.
“I take it back. You’re not a rainbow. You’re the evil, gold-hoarding leprechaun at the end of it.”
I laughed again.
“What’s so funny?” Grayson asked as he walked into the kitchen.
“I’m not sure.” I smirked. “Why don’t you ask Monkey?”
Parker’s eyes narrowed at me. “Definitely an evil leprechaun,” he said before he stalked from the room.
I turned to grin at Grayson, but my mouth went dry at the sight of him. He was topless, and his gray sweats hung low across his stomach. His hair was still messy from sleep, and he reached up to run his hand through it. I already knew Gray was gorgeous. And muscular. And toned. Everyone did. But right now he looked like something an ancient Greek sculptor had carved out of stone. Then he gave me a subtle sleepy smile that sweetened his hard features and made my stomach dip in an unusual way.
An image suddenly flashed into my mind, and I felt my cheeks warm as I realized this was all too similar to my dream last night. Gray had been missing a shirt then too. And smiling at me just like that. I quickly averted my eyes.
“I guess that means you’ve heard mom’s nickname for Parker,” Gray said as he strolled over and took the cereal box from my hands. I hadn’t poured any into my bowl yet, so Gray went to fill it up for me.
“Is this what you want?” he asked.
This was even starting to sound like my dream. I gave a small nod. Once he was done, he lifted the milk carton over my bowl and started to pour .
“Just tell me to stop.”
I choked out a cough and almost fell off my stool. Now he was straight-up quoting my dream. It was suddenly all coming back to me in shocking, vivid detail, and I became even more certain it wasn’t the kind of dream your best friend was supposed to take a starring role in. Unless—could I be dreaming right now? I lowered my hand to my leg to pinch myself and let out a quiet yelp of pain. “Ouch.”
“You okay?” Grayson asked, a slight crease in his brow.
“Oh yeah, fine,” I muttered. “You just said something similar last night.”
“Huh?”
“Uh, no, nothing, don’t worry about it,” I stuttered, shifting into a more stable position on my stool. “What have you got going on today?” I quickly changed the subject.
“Well, I’ve been thinking about that,” he said, his gaze shifting uneasily away from me as he focused on his breakfast. “And as your dating coach, I’ve had some ideas for your next lesson.”
“You have?” Coaching was the last thing I felt like talking about right now. I was convinced all the flirting practice was to blame for my embarrassing dream, and the unusual feelings I was still experiencing as I cast my eyes over Grayson’s shirtless frame.
“Yeah, your attempt at flirting on the lake yesterday was a good start,” he said. “And I think it’s time to take things to the next level.”
“Really?” I didn’t know whether to feel pleased that he’d complimented my skills, or nervous about what the “next level” involved. Mostly, I think I was shocked Grayson had taken the time to come up with a lesson plan. “You think I should try flirting with Damien again? ”
“Not exactly,” he said. “That’s still too advanced for you.”
“What then?” I folded my arms, a little frustrated I wasn’t a pro yet.
“Well, you said you wanted to learn how to get a guy’s attention. That’s your next lesson.”
“Okay, go on.”
“You’re going to ignore Damien.”
“Ignore him?”
“Yep. Totally. Pretend he doesn’t exist.”
“What? How is that going to get his attention?”
“Because, right now, every other girl at school is flirting with him and falling at his feet. If you want to stand out, you’re better off doing the exact opposite. You need to play hard to get.”
“This doesn’t sound right.”
“Trust me,” Gray said. “It’s right. Do you know what drives a guy crazy?”
I slowly shook my head and inched back, because he seemed to have moved closer. He smelled so good it was driving me a little crazy. He was also still shirtless. Why was he still shirtless? Seriously, didn’t he feel the cold?
“Seeing something they want and knowing they can’t have it.” The way he was staring into my eyes had me wondering what it would feel like to be wanted by Grayson. And not just in a dream. He spoke like he was talking from experience, and I considered who the girl might be, whether he still wanted her, and if I had the skills to get away with murder. A surprising sense of possessiveness took hold of me. I didn’t want Gray to look at anyone that way .
It was only when he turned back to his food that I drew in a ragged breath. There was something wrong with me this morning. It had to be that stupid dream. My mom was always telling me not to have candy before bed; perhaps this was why. Too many gummy worms, and apparently nightmares became delight-mares.
“Some girl driving you crazy, Gray?” I asked with a laugh I didn’t quite feel. It’s how I normally would have replied, but it was a struggle to maintain my usual lighthearted attitude. I was also way too invested as I waited for his reply.
“Only you,” he responded with a playful smile.
I knew he was joking, but his words relaxed me. Maybe he’d felt that way about a former crush. At least that meant I wouldn’t have to start my day by googling how to bury a body in the middle of winter .
Gray finished his cereal and went to clean his bowl in the sink. With him on the other side of the kitchen, I could think a little clearer. I took a few more mouthfuls of cereal as I considered his suggestion. “So, all I have to do is ignore Damien? It sounds a little too simple.”
Gray turned to face me, leaning back against the kitchen counter. “That’s because ignoring him is only the first stage of the plan.”
“Only the first stage? What’s stage two?”
“Well.” He cleared his throat. “There’s actually one thing that drives a guy even more crazy than seeing something he wants and knowing he can’t have it. ”
“Which is?”
“Seeing someone else get the thing he wants.”
“I’m lost.”
He laughed. “While you’re ignoring Damien, you flirt with someone else.”
So much for Grayson being some coaching genius. “That sounds like a disaster waiting to happen. It’ll be Saturday night all over again. The only difference is this time Damien will be in the audience. How do you know I won’t fail miserably with the other guy too?”
“Because the other guy will be me, of course.”
I almost fell off my stool again. “You?”
“Yeah, why not? I’m supposed to be your coach, aren’t I?”
“I guess, but...” I paused. I couldn’t exactly tell Grayson I was suddenly having second thoughts about practicing flirting with him. How after just one day of coaching I was having inappropriate dreams about him, and was finding it difficult to stop my eyes from scanning his body and coming to rest on his chiseled abs.
“What’s wrong?”
“Nothing, I just . . .”
“Come on, Pidge, you can tell me.”
Could I though? Could I really tell Grayson that I’d dreamed about him? Could I really tell him how good he looked wearing only a pair of loose-fitting gray sweatpants?
“I just...” Nope. I couldn’t do it. “I just worry he might think we’re together, or something.” It wasn’t my main concern with Grayson’s plan, but it was still a potential problem .
“He won’t.”
“How can you be so sure?”
“Because I made it clear to him that we’re not.”
That was news to me. “When?”
“At some point last week. You asked me to be a good wingman, remember?”
“Yeah, I remember.” I just didn’t realize he’d actually gone through with it. I was also a little shocked, because part of me had never really believed Grayson was fully on board with helping me find a guy to kiss. It seemed I was wrong. “Just how clear did you make it?”
“Pretty clear.”
That answered the question of how committed Grayson was. Not only was he planning ahead, he was also going out of his way to be a good wingman. I was the one letting the team down. I needed to shake off my uncertainty and focus on the plan, just like Grayson was.
“Okay,” I said. “Let’s do it. When were you thinking?”
“Uh, today at lunch?” He stumbled over his answer slightly, as though he was surprised by my enthusiasm, but quickly regained his composure. “I’ll make sure I’m sitting near Damien, and you make sure you do your best to pretend he doesn’t exist.”
“Works for me.” I made myself sound confident, but it was extremely daunting. This did feel like a whole new level, and I wondered if I was ready after only one lesson.
“Unless, of course, you want to come up with a new plan?” he said, looking at me with a hint of concern. Could he tell I was second-guessing myself, or was he the one having second thoughts? “It’s fair enough if you’re not feeling up to flirting in public yet... ”
Or was he just doubting my abilities?
“You don’t think I can do it?”
“I think there’s a big difference between practice and a game.”
I clenched my jaw as I stood and closed the distance between us, poking a finger into his ridiculously warm and stupidly toned chest. “You’re wrong about me, Coach. And I’ll prove it to you at lunch.”
His eyes danced with amusement. He might not have made a sound, but I knew he was enjoying this.
“I’m going to flirt with you so hard you’ll forget your own name,” I added before stalking off.
“Don’t forget, we’re driving to school together,” he called after me, spoiling my dramatic exit.
I stuck my middle finger up at him. As I left the room, I was trailed by the faint sounds of his chuckles. Flirt with Gray. Ignore Damien. Should be a piece of cake.
Just a shame I had a habit of burning anything I baked.