Chapter 22
Travis
Istand in front of my closet, towel wrapped around my waist, wondering what the hell I should wear.
Are you really this nervous about going to dinner at the Mile High Diner? A place you’ve had dinner at a million times before?
I shake my head at how my attempt at a pep talk with myself failed. Because of course I’m nervous. I’m having dinner with Anna. And even though both of us have been to the diner countless times with each other, tonight is different.
Tonight is the first time we’ve ever had a meal just the two of us. It’s a date, and I’m nervous.
Because I like Anna. A lot. I don’t want to mess this up.
Even though I don’t exactly know what this is between us.
We used to hate each other. Then we hooked up accidentally. Then we hooked up on purpose…and then we did it again.
And now we like each other. It feels like we’re friends and something else. Something I’m not sure I know what to call yet.
She’s not my girlfriend. I don’t even know if she’s interested in a relationship.
I never was. I dated a bit in high school and college, but nothing stuck.
Probably because I was so focused on hockey and didn’t make time for anyone or anything else.
And because, after seeing how my dad ditched my mom when she needed him the most, the idea of getting serious with someone didn’t appeal to me.
Why would I want to commit to someone who’s gonna leave me out of the blue?
So I’ve only ever done hookups and casual dating, nothing serious.
But this thing with Anna…it’s different.
I push aside those thoughts. I don’t need to be dissecting our situation when I can’t even decide what to wear on our date.
I go back to staring at my closet.
“You’re overthinking this,” I mutter to myself. “It’s not like she’ll be wearing an evening gown to dinner.”
Actually, the thought of seeing Anna in something long and slinky would be hot as hell…
A knock at my bedroom door pulls me out of my thoughts.
“Yeah?”
The door opens, and Nick walks in. “Hey, can I borrow your phone charger? I can’t find mine.”
“Yeah, here you go.”
I grab the one on my bedside table and hand it to him.
“Thanks.” He looks at my open closet. “You going somewhere tonight?”
That familiar punch of guilt lands in the pit of my stomach. “Uh, yeah.”
“Where?”
My mind races as I make sure I don’t look as worked up as I feel. “Not sure yet,” I lie.
“You grabbing dinner?”
“Yeah, probably.”
“Can I come with? I’m starving.”
I look at Nick and hesitate, feeling like a jerk. “I don’t know if that’s a good idea…”
Before I can say more, he smiles.
“Oh shit, you meeting up with a girl?”
“Yeah.” I tug a hand through my hair. “Sorry.”
He just chuckles and smacks my back. “Don’t be sorry, dude. I’m the one who should be sorry for trying to be your third wheel. You should have said something.”
I try to laugh along with him, but it sounds strained. He doesn’t seem to pick up on it though.
“Have fun on your date. I hope you get lucky.”
I cough. “Uh, thanks.”
He moves back toward the door. “You need a condom?”
Jesus. “No, I’m good.”
He walks out, closing the door behind him. I let out a breath, feeling like a piece of shit for lying to my best friend…for hiding that I’m about to go out on a date with his twin sister.
I tell myself that I’m not doing anything wrong. That it’s totally fine for Anna and me to see each other. Nick doesn’t control us.
But as I throw on a short-sleeve button-down and shorts, I know that’s bullshit.
It’s not about control. It’s about being honest with my best friend. And I know that I can’t be right now.
I try not to think about that as I head out to meet Anna.
* * *
When I walk into Mile High Diner and see Anna standing at the front, that knot in my stomach disappears.
When she turns around and sees me, she smiles.
All the breath in my lungs evaporates. Fuck, she’s stunning. Especially in that dress.
She’s wearing a long, flowy, strapless dress the color of the sky, and her hair is piled up in a messy bun. Fuck, she’s so pretty.
“Hey,” she says.
“Hey. Nice dress. You look fucking incredible.”
Her full cheeks flush, and her smile grows. “Thanks. I picked it out because the color reminds me of your eyes.”
“Yeah?”
She nods. I cup her face and give her a lips-only kiss, even though I’d rather tease her lush mouth open with my tongue and kiss her until she’s panting and clawing at my chest…but we’re in public. I can’t be doing that in the middle of a crowded diner.
We sit down at a booth and do a quick scan of the menu.
“Let me guess. You’re ordering pancakes,” I say when she puts down her menu.
Smiling, she rolls her eyes. “Nope.”
“Really?”
“I’m going with waffles instead.”
I crack a smile. “You’re really changing it up there, sweet thing.”
She drags her bottom lip through her teeth, her gaze fiery as she looks at me. “Sweet thing,” she repeats.
“You don’t like that I call you that?”
“No, I like it a lot.”
“Figured it made the most sense. You like sweet things. And you’re very sweet.”
She chuckles. “Oh, come on. I know you don’t think I have a sweet personality.”
“You taste sweet.” I drag my gaze from her mouth down her chest and past her tummy. I look down at the table, where her legs are.
Her lips part, and her eyes widen the slightest bit. That flush on her cheeks glides down to her chest. I quirk my eyebrow at her before downing some water.
She clears her throat, her smile flustered as the server takes our order. When our food arrives, she nods at my plate.
“Do you ever eat a meal that doesn’t have an ungodly amount of protein in it?” she asks.
“Nope.” I slice into my grilled chicken breast and take a bite, then dig into the mashed potatoes on the side.
Anna chuckles as she pours syrup all over the giant waffle on her plate.
“Is this what you do on dates? Hassle the guy for not ordering candy like you?”
She laughs again before taking a bite. “I don’t date much.”
“Why’s that?”
“I don’t really have time with how busy my schedule is. Relationships can be a lot of work, and I don’t want to deal with the hassle. My focus is on getting into med school and becoming a doctor. I’ll think about dating later.”
I think back to when we first started college at Hollis. I vaguely remember Anna with a couple of different guys, but nothing seemed to stick.
“What about you?” she asks. “Do you date?”
“No. I mean, I’ve dated before, in high school and when I started college. A couple of times, the person I was seeing wanted to get serious, but I wasn’t on the same page. Hockey is my priority, and I don’t want any distractions.”
Anna holds up a forkful of waffle. “Cheers to that.”
I laugh, realizing that this is the most I’ve smiled and laughed in a while. And it’s because of her.
“So you’re cool with this not being anything serious? Just hanging out and having fun?” she asks, her expression hesitant.
“Yeah. That’s perfect.”
She looks relieved. I am too. I like Anna a lot, but no way am I ready for a relationship.
My sole focus is hockey, seeing how far I can get as a college player…
seeing if I’ll ever be able to make it pro.
So much is riding on that. My career. My future.
My ability to take care of my mom in case she needs anything…
I can’t let anything get in the way of that.
“It’s wild how much you love chicken. It’s all I ever see you eat,” Anna says after a second.
“I’m a simple guy,” I say around a mouthful.
“When we were in middle school and high school, the only thing I remember you eating was chicken. Chicken nuggets. Chicken strips. Chicken wings.”
I smile at how she remembers that about me.
“Oh my gosh, remember when my mom made venison stew for the first time? You were staying over for dinner, and she gave you a huge bowl. Your eyes…” Anna trails off as she laughs. “You looked freaked out.”
“I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t want to hurt her feelings and tell her I didn’t want to eat it. But I really didn’t want to eat it.”
Anna’s laughing so hard that she’s tearing up. She wipes her eyes with her napkin.
“Wait, did you end up eating it?” she asks. “I can’t remember.”
“I forced down one chunk of venison. Then I gave your brother the rest when your mom was away from the dining table. Then I ate the vegetables.”
Anna’s head falls back as she laughs again. “Good old Nick. He’s a human garbage disposal. He’ll eat anything.”
“Yeah, he was a good friend to me in that moment.”
Anna’s smile starts to fade at what I’ve said.
She pokes at her half-eaten waffle with her fork. “Sometimes I feel like we’re doing something wrong by seeing each other,” she says. “Even though we’re not.”
I reach across the table and grab her hand in mine. “I feel that way too.”
She lets out a breath as she looks at our interlocked fingers. “I know Nick wouldn’t like it if he knew we were hanging out together. But part of me doesn’t care.”
I lock eyes with her. “Same.”
“Maybe that makes me a bad sister.”
“It doesn’t.” I give her hand a soft squeeze.
“I want to keep seeing you, Travis. I’m not ready to tell anyone about us yet though. Especially not my brother. He’ll freak out and get upset. I don’t want to deal with that.”
“I get it. I don’t want to tell him either. But I was worried, though, that you’d feel like I was treating you like a dirty little secret. I swear I’m not.”
She shakes her head. “I don’t think that. You don’t make me feel that way. I want to keep this between just us. I don’t want anyone’s opinions interfering with what you or I want to do. All that matters is what we feel and what we want.”
“Exactly. I want that too.”
She blinks, and that worried furrow in her brow fades. “So we’re on the same page?”
“Yeah. We are.”
We finish our food. When Anna gets up to use the restroom, I pay the check.
When she sits back down at the booth, she glances around. “Have you seen our server? I wanna pay.”
“Already did.”
She whips her head at me, her mouth parted open in shock. She starts to smile as she playfully smacks my hand.
“Travis! I told you I was going to pay this time.”
“Too bad. Let’s go.”
We slide out of the booth and head out of the diner. It’s early evening now, so the heat of the day is fading. It already feels ten degrees cooler.
“So what do you usually do after dinner?” I ask.
“Study,” Anna says with a laugh.
“School year’s over, and you’ve already taken the MCAT, so you can’t study. What then?”
Her smile turns shy. “You really wanna know?”
“Yeah.”
She tucks a chunk of her golden-brown hair behind her ear. “I watch my favorite episodes of Grey’s Anatomy.”
“Then let’s do that.”
She tilts her head at me. “You want to watch Grey’s Anatomy with me?”
A breeze whips around us, flipping a chunk of her hair in her face. I reach over and gently brush it out of her eyes.
“Yeah. I do. I wanna keep hanging out with you, if that’s okay.”
She flashes a gorgeous smile that makes me weak. “Okay. Let’s go back to my place then.”