Chapter 29
Anna
“This is nice,” I murmur, eyes closed, cuddled into Travis’s chest.
We’re lying in the back of his SUV with the seats down, wrapped in blankets.
It’s dark now. The sunroof is open, so we have a clear view of the indigo sky. A million stars glitter like diamonds above us.
His arms tighten around me. “You’re comfortable?”
“Very.” I lean back slightly, open my eyes, and see him looking at me.
“Sorry the skinny dipping celebration didn’t work out,” he says.
I chuckle and trace a circle over his chest. “It’s okay. I like this better.”
We’ve been lying in his car for the past couple of hours, dozing on and off while cuddling with each other.
“Still cold?” he asks.
“A little. I’m not a human space heater like you.”
An amused half-smile appears on his handsome face. “Yeah, you’re an ice cube. Your toes are always so damn cold.”
I giggle, pressing my toes into the tops of his feet. “You love my cold toes.”
“I do.” He kisses me, then pulls part of the blanket that’s on him and wraps it around me. “Here.”
The plush blanket slides off his torso, and as he lifts his arm, I spot bright green ink on the side of his ribcage.
“How have I not noticed your tattoo?” I ask.
He raises his arm so I can see the full work. It’s on the side of his torso, right on top of his ribs, underneath his upper arm.
“Maybe because every other time I’ve been shirtless around you, we’re in the middle of hooking while watching Grey’s Anatomy in your dark living room?” he says.
I smile. “That must be it.”
I trace my fingers along the image, which is the size of my hand. It’s a cluster of deep green leaves connected along a curly vine. His arm is usually covering it, so it's actually pretty difficult to see.
“This is really cool,” I say. “Why leaves?”
“It’s Ivy. For my mom. I got it when she was going through chemo to cheer her up.”
My chest aches. “Travis, that’s so beautiful.”
“She didn’t think it was at the time. She hates tattoos. She got so mad at me.”
“But it’s such a sweet gesture. And so much more creative than just getting her name tattooed on you.”
“She eventually came around. She likes it now.” He lowers his arm back down. “I don’t see any tattoos on you.”
“I currently have zero,” I say.
“Would you ever get one?”
“Yeah, but I want it to have meaning, like what you have. I don’t think I’d like to get just anything.”
“You should get a pile of sugar tattooed on you.”
I shove his shoulder, but he just laughs.
“I think it’d be cute. Sweet tattoo for a sweet girl like you.”
I roll my eyes, still smiling. “Where should I get it?” I ask.
He kisses the hinge of my jaw. I shiver.
“Maybe here,” he growls softly.
Eyes closed, I laugh. “No tattoos on my face or neck.”
He runs his mouth along the side of my neck. “Mmm, well, how about…” He trails kisses along my collarbone. “Here?”
I giggle, then groan and shake my head. His mouth always feels like heaven on my body.
He pulls down the blanket and kisses the top of my breast. “Here?”
I laugh again. “No way.”
He swirls his tongue over my nipple and groans. “Definitely here.”
I whimper as he teases and sucks and gently bites.
“Wait,” he rasps, then grazes his lips along the side of my breast, right over my ribcage. He licks my skin, then scrapes gently with his teeth.
I tremble and whimper.
“Is this a little sensitive?” he asks.
“Yeah, but in a good way. I like it when you kiss me here.”
He kisses me softly there again, then laps his tongue. My eyes roll back.
“Looks like we found your sweet spot, sweet thing. And maybe the spot for your future tattoo.”
I smile, then whimper.
“I’m gonna kiss you here every time I’m with you,” he murmurs against my skin.
He kisses down my tummy, then settles between my legs. He swipes his tongue over my clit in that slow, teasing rhythm that always makes me lose my mind.
I tug my fingers through his hair as the pressure builds between my thighs, seeping up my tummy and chest.
He takes his time, licking me slowly. So slowly. I feel like I’m on the verge of coming for minutes.
This is how he always is with me. Measured and filthy. Never, ever rushing.
My pussy is aching, and my entire body is throbbing, begging for release. But he won’t give it to me.
It’s sweet torture being eaten like this. It’s almost like Travis doesn’t really give a damn if I come or not. He’s just doing it because he likes having his tongue on my clit.
“Why won’t you let me come?” I whine, the buildup on the razor’s edge of too much.
He lets out a rough laugh against my pussy. I shiver at the vibrations.
He kisses the inside of my thigh. “Because. I like savoring you. Your sounds. The way you move. The way you taste. I never want it to end.”
My chest tightens, and my body starts to shake. Then he flicks his tongue harder and faster, finally showing me mercy.
I fall apart, screaming and moaning in his car. With my fingers tangled in his hair, I grind against his face. It’s shameless, the way I’m grinding all over his mouth. But I can’t help it. His mouth and tongue are my weakness.
When I start to come down and let go of him, he kisses up my tummy and chest. I reach down and grab his hard cock in my hand and start to stroke him. My mouth waters to take him down my throat, but I want to tease this out a bit, just like he did with me.
A satisfied feeling loops through me. I love the feel of his cock, hard and throbbing against my tongue. I love how I have to relax the back of my throat to take him. I love the rough, caveman sounds he makes.
It’s different with him. So much feels different with him.
He’s groaning into my shoulder the more turned on he gets.
He grabs my chin with his hand and kisses me, hard.
“Can you suck my dick now, sweet thing? Please?”
I smile against his lips and give him one more teasing kiss before I drag my mouth down his chest and abs. I run my tongue over the ridges of his muscles, groaning softly. This man is impossibly sexy.
I settle between his legs and grip his shaft in my hand. Then I give his balls a slow, sloppy lick while jerking him.
A low, tortured noise slips from his lips, and his thigh muscles tense.
“Are you fucking serious?” he mutters.
I smile as I tease the head of his cock, then I finally swallow him. Another muttered curse falls from his lips.
I’m sucking and licking the head of his throbbing cock. He hardens even more when I play with his balls.
“Oh, fuck. I’m close…”
I work my mouth and hands faster.
“Shit, Anna, I’m gonna come. Do you want me to…”
He trails off when I gaze up at him and take him deeper into my mouth. Something raw and fiery flashes in his eyes. A second later, he spills in my throat with a roar.
I swallow as much of his come as I can. When I pull off, it’s smeared on my lips. I barely have the time to wipe it off before he grabs me and kisses me until I can’t breathe.
“You’re gonna kill me with that mouth,” he says, his tone on the verge of sounding angry.
But I just smile. Because I know he’s not mad. Not even close. He’s just so turned.
His phone buzzes with a text. It does a few more times after that, but he ignores it.
We’re settling back into the covers when my phone buzzes with a text, then another.
We both grab our phones.
“Your brother’s texting me,” Travis says.
When I look at my screen and see that Nick texted me too, I still. “He texted me too.”
We look at each other. I spot the worry in his eyes right away. I’m sure he can see in me too.
I skim my brother’s messages.
Nick: Hey, you wanna grab some food? Travis is blowing me off.
Nick: I guess you’re not free. Damn, everyone’s busy lol
Travis shows me his messages.
Nick: Yo Travvie boy. I’m starving, wanna grab some food?
Nick: Feel like meeting me at that new sandwich place, or wanna do take out?
Nick: I’m guessing you’re busy. Text me later when you’re free.
Guilt lands in the center of my stomach at how my brother is reaching out to both of us, and we’re both ignoring him.
I send Nick a text.
Me: Hey, sorry, I’m out with some friends from my lab. Wanna get dinner tomorrow?
Nick: Yeah, sounds good
I’m a jerk for lying to my brother…but I know how pissed he’d be if he found out about Travis and me.
I remind myself that my brother isn’t entitled to know about my personal life. I’ve never cared about his. Even when he and Poppy were fake dating, then dating for real, I wasn’t mad. I was surprised, but not even close to mad.
I think about how different that is between us…how it feels like a double standard knowing that if Nick ever found out about Travis and me, he’d be livid.
I start to feel annoyed, but then I stop myself. It’s not fair for me to be mad at something Nick doesn’t even know.
I’m allowed to keep this private. But it still feels wrong.
Travis sets his phone aside and turns to me. “What’s going on in that head of yours?”
“Just thinking about how guilty I feel for hiding this from Nick. I’m also feeling a little annoyed that he’d even care in the first place if he ever found out about us. And I’m frustrated at myself for getting so worked up about this thing in the first place. It’s not like we’re a couple.”
Travis flinches.
I look at him, feeling bad that I hurt his feelings. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to sound so dismissive. It’s just that…we agreed this wasn’t serious.”
“I know. I’m not mad.” He kisses my lips softly. “But I’d be lying if I said this didn’t mean anything to me.” He holds my gaze. “You mean a lot to me, Anna.”
I stare at Travis, letting the weight of his admission wash over me.
He blinks and shakes his head, his brow furrowed like he’s nervous.
“Sorry, I wasn’t trying to make this weird—”
I rest my hand against my cheek. “You didn’t. I feel the same way about you.”
His pauses. “You do?”
I nod, relief and joy coursing through me now that I know these feelings growing inside of me these past few weeks aren’t one-sided.
“Yes. You’re more than just the guy I hook up with. I care about you.”
His eyes brighten.
“I’m still not ready for a relationship, but…this thing between us feels more meaningful than just a friends with benefits situation,” I say. “Does it feel like that to you?”
“Yeah. It does.” He swallows. “I’m not interested in anyone but you, Anna.”
“I’m not interested in anyone except you.”
He kisses me slowly, softly. His hands pull me closer to him.
“You’re mine, Anna,” he growls against my mouth. “Mine. No one else’s. Understand?”
My entire body trembles with want and need and every other desperate feeling that exists.
“Yes,” I whimper as he slips his hand between my legs and teases another orgasm out of me.
Things between Travis and me are still complicated. We’re not officially a couple, but we’re acting like one…we’ve agreed not to see anyone else…and we have to keep each other a secret from my brother and my best friend…
But that’s all okay. Because in this moment, all that matters is us.