Chapter 7
7
DAKOTA
I waited for what seemed like a lifetime for him to respond. This could be it. His expression could change in a heartbeat. Maybe he’d drop me off at the lodge with promises to call me. He might even get my phone number and pretend he was going to do just that.
I’d been down this road before—being ghosted after telling a guy that I’m a virgin. It’d hurt at the time, but this would be different. Something about what I was feeling with this guy was already more intense than anything that had come before.
Maybe that was why I was still a virgin. Nothing like this had ever come my way.
“How?” he asked. “I don’t understand.”
I shrugged. “I’ve dated, but guys in my high school were weird, and after high school I floundered around, trying to figure out what I was going to do with my life. I guess guys were bothered by the fact that I didn’t really have my life together yet. When this baking competition came up, I jumped at the chance.”
The chance to what? I didn’t know how to explain that. It just seemed like the beginning of the rest of my life. I’d win the competition, open my bakery in Seduction Summit, and get my own place. A nice little cottage—maybe on the water, or maybe just with a view of the mountains.
“Are you waiting until marriage?” he asked.
I shook my head. “I’m just waiting for the right person.”
And that right person was seated across the table from me.
That thought shot through me like a lightning bolt. It was exactly how I felt, but what if he didn’t feel the same?
He stared out the window as he took a long sip from his beer. I, meanwhile, wasn’t sure I could even breathe. Everything seemed to hinge on the next words out of his mouth.
Finally, he looked at me. “I’ve never been a woman’s first time. But if you want to…you know, I’m your guy.”
I’m your guy. Those words echoed through my mind in the seconds that followed. I wanted him to be my guy—not just for my first time, but for the rest of my life. But what I didn’t want was for him to do me the favor of taking my virginity just because he thought I was tired of it or needed to be rid of it for some reason.
“No,” I said before I could stop myself.
The look on his face told me I’d misjudged his offer. Did he want the same thing I did? If so, I’d say yes to his offer. A thousand times, yes.
“I don’t want to just have a one-night stand with you,” I said. “I want more.”
“You’ve got it,” he said. “Anything. In fact, if you said you just wanted me for a one-night stand, I’d say no to that, as painful as it would be. I want more. With you.”
He added those last two words, as if to make it clear that he was feeling the same thing I was. I summoned my courage and asked the only question on my mind.
“Did you say you lived near here?”
And that was how I found myself in his pickup, being driven to his house, which was only a few miles from the restaurant. I’d never been this nervous in my life. Not at this morning’s competition, not even the time I lost the finals of the fifth-grade spelling bee in front of my entire family and half of Adairsville.
But as Chaz took a right into a driveway, I was momentarily distracted from my fear and excitement. “Oh my gosh,” I blurted. “This is my dream house.”
I couldn’t believe what I was seeing. Did he actually live here? I looked over at him, my mouth hanging open.
“This?” he asked.
He sounded genuinely surprised. I got it. It was a small brick house. Probably nothing special in his eyes.
“I had this built myself,” he said. “I might move my mom in here when I take off for the mountains. It’s perfect for a single person. I’ll need something big enough for a family.”
He glanced over at me then, and my heart did a little jump. He was talking about family again, and of course he wasn’t necessarily referring to me, but all I could think was that a cozy place up in the mountains with him sounded like heaven. It wouldn’t just be my dream house. It would be my dream life.
“Ready?” he asked, reaching for his door.
He’d shut off the engine while I was lost in thought, and now I was just sitting here like a lump on a log.
“Ready.” I smiled and reached for my door, hopping out.
I settled my purse strap on my shoulder as I walked. My legs felt wobbly, and I was having a hard time catching my breath. It wasn’t the exertion that was doing it. It was knowing what was about to happen.
Was I really going to do this? I was going to lose my virginity tonight. I never would have imagined when this day started that this was how it would end.
Chaz put his hand in the small of my back as we stepped onto the sidewalk and made our way to the front porch. When he dropped his hand so I could climb those steps, my body missed the warmth of his touch. Even through the down jacket and thick sweater I wore, I’d felt it. It might have been my imagination, but my entire body warmed, just knowing his hand was on me.
“Wow,” I said as I looked around.
It wasn’t a compliment. It wasn’t really an insult either. What could I say about my surroundings? Outside was a charming cottage, but inside looked nothing at all what I’d expect. This place was a true bachelor pad.
The kitchen was toward the back, but all that stood between the door and the bar with stools pushed up to it was a large pool table on one side and a big-screen TV with a couch and two recliners.
“I guess you can tell a man lives here,” he said.
I turned to look at him and was surprised at how close he was behind me. He was still standing in the entrance, having shut the front door behind him. He was looking around as though seeing his own place for the first time.
“Are you kidding?” I asked. “You’re living the dream. Do you know how many married men would love to have a house like this? If only to escape every now and then.”
Chaz shook his head. “I guess the grass is always greener, but I’d take that life over this one any day.”
There was sadness in his voice—just a hint of it. The average person wouldn’t have noticed it, but I’d spent enough time around him today that I could see past the determined set of his features.
His gaze landed on me again and he gave a half smile. “I’m sure there are plenty of moms who want to escape too. You think I could rent it out once I move to the mountains?”
I turned and took another look around the house. There were two doors to the left—one was open, one was closed. I assumed those were bedrooms. He could remove the pool table and there would be plenty of room for a dining table and an extended living room area.
I didn’t say any of that, though. I wasn’t sure why I was imagining his house as a home for someone who wasn’t a thirty-something bachelor.
“I guess if you want at least two kids, you’ll need more bedrooms than this,” I said, turning back to face him.
Our eyes met for a long moment, and I held my breath, waiting for what he’d say next. He was definitely thinking about his future. Was he imagining it with me? I wanted to believe it, but assuming would be a big mistake.
“Let me take your coat,” he blurted.
That snapped me out of my thoughts. I looked down to realize I was still wearing my puffer coat and holding my purse. I hadn’t even noticed. He settled both of our coats on the back of the couch, making me wonder if he ever used the coat closet that was near the door.
“You want something to drink?” he asked.
As I watched him rush toward the kitchen, I realized something. He was nervous. This man, the most handsome guy I’d ever seen, was actually nervous about being here alone with me?
Maybe it was the virgin thing, or maybe it was this intense attraction I was feeling too. Whatever the case, knowing he was nervous made me feel a little more confident.
“I don’t have much,” he said. “Some orange juice, milk, and water, of course.”
“Water will be fine,” I said.
I ran my fingers over the rail and smiled at the memories it evoked. “My friend’s dad had a pool table in the basement. I guess it was his man cave. He had a bar, and he’d make us cherry sodas and we’d play for hours. I got really good at it.”
“I bought this thing off a military buddy a couple of years ago. I didn’t have much furniture, so I figured why not? At least this would fill this empty space. It doesn’t make much sense, though. I basically play by myself.”
I turned to the wall and grabbed a pool cue, suddenly feeling more confident than ever. I was in my element. This I could do.
Okay, so if I were honest with myself, I’d admit I was basically procrastinating. Playing pool meant not having to get naked right away, and I was terrified of what he’d think when he saw me naked. What if I wasn’t pretty enough? What if he didn’t like that my stomach wasn’t exactly flat and my hips had that little extra lumpiness right above them? Love handles, they were called.
“Let’s make this interesting,” Chaz said, handing me a glass with ice and water in it.
I was a little nervous about what he might say next, but I had to admit I was excited at the same time. “What do you mean?”
“We play Eight Ball,” he said. “With each shot I make, you take off an article of clothing and vice versa. If you want to speed it up, if we miss a shot, we have to take off an article of clothing then too. First person naked has to fulfill the other person’s wishes.” He narrowed his eyes at me. “Game?”
Holy shit. Get naked out here with the lights on while continuing to play? That was beyond scary. Terrifying. I’d be going from the shallow end of the pool directly into the deep end.
I should say no. We could play pool and get naked later. He’d understand. In fact, if I even showed the slightest hint I was uncomfortable, he’d probably back off the idea completely.
But I didn’t do that. The part of me that was scared was overruled by the part of me that was exhilarated at the idea of taking his challenge.
“Game,” I said. “Let’s do it.”