Chapter 15
Mikhail
Istood outside Shanice's door trying to gather my thoughts.
Then I realized I was done thinking, strategizing, and holding back.
I knocked once, then opened the door without waiting for permission.
Shanice was sitting on her bed, her laptop open in front of her.
She looked up when I entered, her expression immediately guarded.
"I didn't say you could come in."
"I don't care." I closed the door behind me and locked it.
Her eyes widened slightly. "Excuse me?"
"We need to talk,” I moved closer, my eyes locked on hers, "about us."
"There is no us."
"Liar." I reached the bed and took her laptop, closed it, then set it aside. "There's been an us since I saw you. You know it. I know it. Stop pretending otherwise."
She scoffed. "You're only saying that because you need me to marry you."
"No. I'm saying it because it's the truth." I sat on the edge of the bed, close enough to touch her but not quite. "I love you, Shanice. I'm in love with you. And I'm done pretending that's not what this is about."
She stared at me, her breath catching. "You don't mean that."
"Yes, I do." I moved closer, crowding into her space.
"I love the way you fight back when I tell you what to do.
I love the way you sing in the shower. I love how fierce you are, how loyal, how strong.
I love that you've been through hell and you're still standing.
I love that you make pink your bitch every time that you wear it.
I love that your face lights up when I surprise you. I love everything about you."
"Mikhail, stop." She backed away and I followed.
"Why? Because hearing it scares you? Because it means this is real and not just some transaction?" I cupped her face, forcing her to look at me. "I love you. And I want to marry you. Not because I have to. Because I choose to."
Tears welled in her eyes. "How am I supposed to believe that?"
"Because I'm going to prove it." I leaned in, my lips brushing against hers. "Right now."
I kissed her, hard, deep, and claiming. She made a sound in the back of her throat, her hands coming up to push at my chest, but I caught them, pinning them at her sides.
"No," I murmured against her mouth. "You don't get to push me away anymore. You don't get to pretend you don't want this."
"I hate you," she gasped.
"No, you don't." I kissed down her jaw, her neck, biting hard enough to leave marks. "You hate that you want me. That's different."
I released her hands and pushed her back onto the bed, following her down. She was breathing hard, her eyes dark with desire, anger, and something that looked like fear.
"Tell me to stop," I said, my hands moving to the hem of her shirt. "Tell me you don't want this, and I'll walk away right now."
She opened her mouth, but no words came out.
"That's what I thought." I pulled her shirt over her head, tossing it aside. She wasn't wearing a bra, and the sight of her bare breasts made my mouth water.
"You're so fucking beautiful," I murmured, lowering my head to take one nipple into my mouth.
She arched off the bed with a cry, her hands flying to my hair. I sucked hard, then bit down gently, making her gasp.
"Mikhail, please…"
"Please what?" I moved to her other breast, giving it the same attention. "Please stop? Please keep going? Use your words, baby."
"I don't know," she sobbed. "I don't know what I want."
"Yes, you do." I kissed down her stomach, my hands hooking into the waistband of her pajama pants. "You want me. You want this. You're just too stubborn to admit it."
I pulled her pants and underwear off in one swift motion, spreading her legs wide. The sight of her, bare, wet, and wanting, made me groan.
"Look at you," I murmured, running my finger through her folds. "Already so wet for me. Your body knows what it wants, even if your brain won't admit it."
"Mikhail, no…"
I would’ve backed away and stopped, but she spread her legs further open, inviting me inside.
“Does no mean yes?” I kissed her thigh. “Or does it mean no?”
“How does this prove that you love me?” She asked.
“It doesn’t, but it proves how much you want me.” I groaned.
“And love?”
“I’ll give up everything to go away with you. You’ll never have to marry me. All you have to do is let me keep you safe. I need you alive, baby. I need you breathing. More than anything, I need you to be mine.”
“Mikhail,” her voice broke, caught in her throat. “That’s not love.”
“You’re right.” I cupped her face, forcing her to look at me.
"Love is knowing your favorite color is a pale powder pink and not a Pepto pink.
It's remembering that you take your coffee with Splenda and cream, that you hate olives but love mushrooms, that you always tuck your hair behind your left ear when you're nervous. "
Her eyes filled with tears.
"Love is wanting to give you the world, my protection, my devotion, and being willing to walk away if that's what's best for you." My voice broke slightly. "Because your life, your happiness, matters more than what I want."
"Mikhail," she whispered.
"Love is this, Shanice. It's being terrified that you'll say no and risking it all anyway.
It's being vulnerable with someone for the first time in my life.
It's trusting you with parts of me I've never shown anyone.
" I kissed her softly. "So yes, I need you.
I want you. But more than that, I love you.
Every stubborn, fierce, beautiful part of you.
And I'm going to spend the rest of my life proving it. "
Shanice pulled my mouth to hers and I accepted all of her kisses. She was indulgent and greedy, but then she took my hand and placed it directly on her pussy and I grunted.
“I need…”
"Shh." I lowered my head and licked her, one long stroke from bottom to top.
She cried out and her hips bucked off the bed.
I pinned them down with one arm across her stomach and went to work.
I wasn't gentle or careful. I ate her like a man starving, my tongue working her clit with brutal precision while my fingers thrust into her.
She was writhing beneath me, her hands fisted in my hair, pulling hard enough to hurt. I didn't care nor stop.
"Oh God, oh God, Mikhail!"
"That's it," I murmured against her. "Say my name. Let me hear you."
“Mikhail!” She closed her eyes and I pulled back.
“Look at me or I’ll fucking stop.”
I added another finger, curling them to hit that spot inside her that made her scream. My mouth went back to her clit, sucking, licking, and nibbling until she was shaking.
"I'm going to come," she gasped, but her eyes were on me. "Mikhail, I'm…"
I pulled back. “But you’re doing so well.”
She made a sound of frustrated rage, glaring at me. "What the fuck?"
“I love the way you taste.” I kissed between her breasts.
“But you stopped.”
"You don't get to come yet." I wiped my mouth with the back of my hand, watching her, I licked it clean. "Not until you admit what you want."
"I want to come, but you’re being an asshole.” She sighed.
"Not good enough." I lowered my head again, giving her one slow, teasing lick. "Tell me what you really want. Speak up, baby."
"I want you to fuck me," she sobbed. "Please, Mikhail, I need to come."
I pulled back again.
"No."
Her eyes blazed with fury and desperate need. "Why not?"
"Because I told you. When I fuck you, it's going to be for the rest of our lives." I moved back up her body, caging her in with my arms. "So if you want my dick, Shanice, you're going to have to agree to marry me. For real. Not because you have to. Because you want to."
"That's not fair."
"I don't care about fair. I care about you. About us." I kissed her hard. "I love you. And I'm not fucking you until you admit you love me too."
"I’m not…"
I dropped back down and sucked her clit hard, my fingers thrusting deep. She screamed, her whole body tensing, right on the edge.
Then I stopped again.
"Say it," I demanded. "Tell me you love me. Tell me you want to marry me. Tell me you're mine."
Tears streamed down her face. "You're torturing me."
"I'm showing you what it's been like for me. Wanting you. Needing you. Not being able to have you." I gave her another slow lick. "Now say it."
"I can't."
"Yes, you can." I thrust my fingers into her again, curling them. "Say it, Shanice. Tell me the truth."
"I love you," she finally sobbed. "God help me, I love you."
Relief and triumph surged through me. "Again."
"I love you. I hate that I love you, but I do."
"And?"
"And I want to marry you." She was crying harder now, her body trembling. "I want to be yours. I want all of it. Just please, please let me come."
"One more thing." I looked up at her, holding her gaze. "Say you'll marry me tomorrow. At the courthouse. Say you'll become my wife."
"Yes," she gasped. "Yes, I'll marry you tomorrow. I'll be your wife. Now pleeeeease!"
I didn't make her beg anymore.
I lowered my head and brought her over the edge with ruthless efficiency. She came apart screaming my name, her whole body shaking, her hands pulling my hair hard enough to make my scalp burn.
I worked her through it, drawing out every last wave of pleasure until she was boneless and spent. Then I crawled back up her body and pulled her into my arms. She was crying, great heaving sobs against my chest.
"I've got you," I murmured, stroking her hair. "I've got you, baby. You're safe. You're mine. I've got you."
"I can't believe I said yes," she hiccupped. "I can't believe I'm actually doing this."
"Do you regret it?"
She was quiet for a long moment. Then she said, "Ask me in a year."
I smiled against her hair. "Fair enough."
We lay there in silence, her breathing gradually evening out. I could feel her exhaustion, the emotional toll of everything that had happened.
"Tomorrow," she said quietly. "We're really doing this tomorrow?"
"Nine in the morning. Courthouse. Just us, Olek, and Katrina as witnesses."
"That's insane."
"You keep saying that."
"Because it keeps being true." She tilted her head back to look at me. "What happens after we're married?"
"We figure it out. One day at a time." I kissed her forehead. "But you finish school. That's non-negotiable. And we wait on kids until you're ready. Could be a year, could be five years. I don't care. We do this at your pace."
"And Dmitri?"
"Becomes a non-issue the moment you're my wife. You'll be protected. Untouchable. And if he tries anything, he'll have to go through me first."
She studied my face for a long moment. "You really love me."
"Yes."
"Even though this is crazy."
"Especially because it's crazy." I cupped her face. "I don't do things halfway, Shanice. When I commit, it’s completely. So when I say I love you, I mean it. When I say I want to spend the rest of my life with you, I mean it. And when I say I'm going to make you happy, I'm going to die trying."
Fresh tears spilled down her cheeks. "I'm scared."
"I know. But I'm not going anywhere. And I'm not letting you go, okay?."
She nodded and settled back against my chest.
We stayed like that for a long time, wrapped up in each other, both of us on the edge of something we couldn't quite name.
Tomorrow, everything would change. Shanice would become my wife.
And I was going to spend the rest of my life proving to her that saying yes was the best decision she'd ever made.
The next morning came too fast and too slow all at once. I woke with Shanice still in my arms, the early morning light painting her skin gold. She was already awake, staring at the ceiling.
"Second thoughts?" I asked quietly.
"About a thousand of them." She turned to look at me. "But I'm still going."
"Good."
We got ready in silence, both of us moving around each other with careful precision. She chose a simple pink dress that was so light it was almost white. It made her look like something out of a dream. I wore a suit, dark and formal. When we came downstairs, Olek and Katrina were waiting.
Katrina's eyes filled with tears when she saw Shanice. "You look beautiful."
"Thank you." Shanice's voice was steady, but I could see the tremor in her hands.
I took one of them, threading our fingers together.
"Ready?" Olek asked.
I looked at Shanice. She looked back at me.
Then she nodded.
"Ready."
We drove to the courthouse in silence. Inside, we were led to a small room where a judge waited.
Everything had been arranged, expedited, paid for.
All we had to do was say the words. The ceremony was quick.
Efficient. Nothing like what Shanice probably dreamed of as a little girl.
But when the judge asked if I took Shanice to be my wife, my voice was strong and certain.
"I do."
And when he asked if she took me to be her husband, she hesitated for only a second before saying, "I do."
Then we were married. I kissed her in front of the judge and Olek and Katrina, claiming her mouth with all the possession and promise I felt. When we broke apart, she was crying.
"Hey," I murmured, wiping away her tears. "What's wrong?"
"I don't know," she whispered. "Everything. Nothing. I just got married at a courthouse to a man I've known for two months because the alternative was dying. This is insane."
"But you don't regret it."
She looked up at me, her eyes searching mine. "No. I don't regret it."
I kissed her again, softer this time.
"Good. Because you're stuck with me now."
She laughed through her tears.
"You'll get used to it."
Olek cleared his throat. "We should go. Dmitri will be here soon, and I'd rather have this wrapped up before he arrives."
We headed back to the SUV, Shanice's hand in mine. Damn, she was mine to cherish and love now. I didn’t want to take her back to the house just yet. I wanted to give her something to remember.
“Olek, can you take care of things with Dmitri? I have something that I have to do.” I looked down at Shanice.
“Yeah, it's pretty straight forward. Besides, I need to set him straight about a few things anyway. We can catch a share ride, you take the car.”
I took Shanice’s hand and she smiled.
“What are you up to, husband?”
I smiled, because the word held a lot more meaning now. ‘Husband’.
“I want to show you how much today means to me. Yes, we did it quickly. However, it’s much deeper than that for me.”
“I trust you.”
“Say less.” I helped her get into the car and I set my phone to our first destination.