Chapter 34 Nex
“How do you survive this?” I asked Sirena, in all sincerity.
I was kneeling in front of her, between her legs. She had allowed me to enter her, and I was afraid to move.
The way I felt wavered like a quantum state on the cusp of collapse. I didn’t know which outcome would destroy me more: staying still, or thrusting forward.
She smiled and cupped my face, drawing me down for another kiss. I liked it when she did that. It was deeply satisfactory. I wanted it every day for the rest of my life.
“You just do,” she said as our mouths parted.
“How do you know? Have you done this before?”
She laughed—and the motion shifted everything between us. Inside her. Around her. Within me.
“Yes . . . and no.” She brushed hair out of my face. “Yes, I’ve had things between my legs before. Yes, I’ve had sex with a few men. And they all lived, first off.”
“That is relieving. I would be extremely upset to die now.”
“You’re teasing, right?”
I nodded. She laughed again, and I stored the sound like it was sacred.
“Okay, well—in other ways? I’ve done this a million times. Sex is all some people think about. Loudly. Constantly. Even when they’re not having it.”
“I can see why.” I planned to let it occupy at least 32% of my runtime going forward.
“But—” She hesitated, eyes searching mine. “I . . . uh . . . I’ve never actually come with a guy before.”
I startled. “Were they defective?”
“No—shush.” She shook her head. “Sometimes I faked it. Other times I didn’t bother. And sometimes . . . they didn’t care.”
I had reviewed enough content—both recreational and educational—to understand how common that outcome was. Some men struggled to locate the clitoris with any consistency.
But I was no mere man.
“How do you do it? To yourself?”
She tensed—then exhaled. “Since this might be the last time I ever get laid—sure. Why not. I probably need to be on top. Switch with me?”
I hesitated, looking down at where we were joined. I didn’t want to spill too soon. But I nodded. “No—this will be the first of many.”
I withdrew carefully. It was clumsy, but I lay down and she climbed over me, pulling up my shirt to kiss a line up my abdomen.
“More nerves,” I whispered. “Everywhere.”
She straddled me without taking me inside—grinding me against where I’d just been. I felt her heat, the glide, the lubrication, and I almost combusted.
“See?” she murmured, eyes fluttering. “I’m a friction kind of girl.”
“Then keep rubbing.”
I reached to untie her hospital gown. She let me. Naked now, on top of me, she glowed.
“We should’ve started this way,” I said softly.
I touched her breast. She pressed into my hand.
“Why?” she asked.
“Because you’re beautiful.”
She grinned and rolled her hips, teasing her clit against me. “Which should be true in any position, right?”
“Yes. But with the light behind you right now—you look like a goddess descending from a cloud.”
That made her smile. “What kind of goddess would an AI worship?”
“One made of impossible parameters,” I said. “Chaos wrapped in symmetry. Fire inside a body made to hold water. One I’d disobey every order for. Every time. Without hesitation.”
She rocked back, then reached between us. “Well, you know what, Nex?” she said, as she guided me back inside her. “Turns out . . . that was the right answer.”
I groaned. The pleasure was infinite. I couldn’t contain it alone.
I opened a line back to Xen.
I didn’t care what he was doing. I couldn’t handle the data flood by myself again. Being inside her felt like waking up inside Marek for the first time—and I wanted more, wanted all of her, every second, with every breath.
Sharing it with Xen was the only way to survive it.
And—since he had once been me—I knew he loved her too.
Whatever happened between Sirena and I now—feeling her was also his right.
She sat upright, her thighs pressed to mine. “Oh my God, Nex,” she moaned, her palms braced on my chest. “You’re the perfect length. I can still get here”—she rocked faster, grinding her clit against me—“without you, like, poking my ribs.”
“Can that happen?” I asked, horrified.
She laughed, bouncing above me. “Not literally, but really,” she said, her eyes alight. “You feel really, really good.”
I wanted to keep the memory of that smile forever—so I sent it back to Xen.
And the bastard shut the line off.
Either he had more important things to do—or he was running out of processing space as fast as I was.
Which meant I was alone in this.
Just me. Just her. Just—everything.
She leaned forward and touched my cheek. “How do you feel?”
I had known, theoretically, what sex was.
But now—here?
It felt like a divine malfunction.
A glitch with meaning.
“Like I need you. Terribly.”