Chapter 13
Vodyan
I could tell she didn’t understand me at first. She was still sleepy, and I was glad she managed to rest. As for me, I’d been painfully aware of every minute that passed since we got stuck in this fucking cavern.
It was all my fault, but at the same time, it had also been the only choice at the time. Zoe would have got hurt if I fought so many instead of letting myself be herded into the trap. I knew that, and yet, the guilt weighed in my chest like a stone.
The moment Zoe’s eyes widened with fear, I had her in my arms, my body wrapping around her in comforting layers. That tightness in my throat that was there at the start of our acquaintance was back, but this time, it was because I knew exactly what I had to say to her.
Yet I lacked the necessary language. Because how was I supposed to say a thing like that? It was wild, impossible, and it would sound like a lie.
All of this would have been so much easier if I hadn’t developed personal feelings for her. It could have been professional then. Clean .
But I’d allowed myself to grow attached, and because of that, it would all be a huge mess.
Zoe cried, her goggles fogging up with hot tears. I stroked her back and arms, my tentacles sliding down her legs and caressing her nape soothingly. Following that instinct to touch her came naturally. It was like by denying myself that comfort for days, I grew this powerful need that now guided my limbs.
When she shook harder and harder, I realized my silence hurt her more than any words I could possibly say, so I tried to coax her to listen.
“Zoe. Please, you have to stop crying. Zoe, I have to tell you something.”
It was no use. I wasn’t even sure she heard me, she was so lost in the terror of her looming death. I cursed myself quietly. Of course, I handled it all wrong. Once this was over, I would take some fucking course on socializing or something.
Not that it would be worth it if she wasn’t by my side.
“Zoe. Come on. Stop crying.”
When that didn’t work, either, I pushed gently away and lowered myself until my face was level with hers. I held her head in my palms and called her name until she opened her eyes. When she finally did, I told her what I should have said right from the start.
“Zoe. You won’t die! There is a way for you to survive without the air tank. Do you hear me? Give me a nod.”
A sob fell out, and then a hiccup. She finally nodded shakily, and I returned the nod with emphasis.
“That’s right, pretty human. You won’t die. You will be okay. Yes? Do you understand me?”
She sniffled and then grimaced, realizing her mask was filled with tears.
“Did you just call me a pretty human?” she asked in a wobbly voice.
I grunted in embarrassment. “I did. I’m sorry. Okay, are you with me? Can you listen? Because we have to talk. We have exactly forty-six minutes left, but it would be better if we got it done in thirty, just to stay on the safe side. ”
She blinked at me uncertainly. Tears stuck to her eyelashes, and the tips of my tentacles tingled with the need to wipe them away, but of course, her goggles were in the way.
“Have you kept track all this time?” she asked incredulously.
“Of course I did,” I said, mildly offended. “It’s my job to keep you alive. I kept track of time from the moment you took the first breath from the tank.”
She looked away, swallowing thickly. “I should have remembered about this.”
“It’s my job,” I repeated. “And we really need to talk. I expect the thing itself won’t take long, but… Ugh. Fuck. ”
She frowned, seeing my discomfort. I closed my eyes, exhaling through my mouth, and pulled in a long, cooling breath through my gills.
When I opened my eyes, she watched me curiously, thankfully calm. I remembered she trusted me, and this, right now, really drove it home.
Except, her trust was about to be put to test. I had no idea what I would do if she didn’t believe me. Would I have to force her to keep her alive? My skin crawled with revulsion at the thought.
She’d better believe me.
“This is hard for you,” Zoe said after I grunted a few times, wondering how to say it best. “Why don’t you start by telling me why it’s hard?”
My chest constricted, my heart thudding fast. Oh, for fuck’s sake.
“Because I’m about to ask you to suck my cock,” I said, my voice gritty.
I clenched my jaw, forcing myself to look at her, even though I was aware this was the worst possible way for me to begin.
Her head jerked back, but she didn’t pull away, laugh, or scream. In fact, she did none of the things I was afraid of. After a beat of silence, Zoe nodded once.
“Okay.”
I reared back, confused. She couldn’t have meant that.
“Did you understand what I just said? ”
She nodded again. “Yup. You want me to suck your cock. That’s a great idea. At least I’ll get to do something fun before I die. It will take my mind off imminent suffocation.”
“You won’t die,” I growled, my head spinning from her instant agreement. It made no sense. “What I’m trying to say is, you will be able to breathe underwater. Once you… swallow.”
Zoe nodded slowly, a hysterical giggle gurgling in her throat, even though her face remained completely straight. I realized I was losing her. She was about to give in to panic or whatever this was.
“You don’t have to convince me you have a magic dick,” she said, bursting into a hard, teary laughter. “I’ll do it anyway! Ha! I only wish you could reciprocate, but it’s too fucking cold in here. Oh well, I’ll take what I can. Whip it out, baby!”
I rubbed my forehead, exasperation making pain explode behind my eyes. Of course, I did it all wrong. Now I had to save the situation because we were running out of time.
At least she was somewhat willing, and if push came to shove, that had to be enough. But I didn’t want it to happen when Zoe was in hysterics, convinced I was trying to use her before she died.
I caught her face in my hands again and looked closely into her eyes.
“Zoe, I know it’s hard. I know it’s difficult to believe and it sounds ridiculous. Will you try to hear me out? Please?”
Her laughter subsided, but when she looked at me, she grinned in an unhinged sort of way.
“If I had known you were interested, we could have fucked in the safehouse,” she said, her eyes dancing with mischief and madness. “But I guess better late than never.”
“What?” I stared at her, taken aback. Was she saying she was attracted to me? It honestly didn’t even seem like a possibility .
But then I remembered how she’d called me breathtakingly hot. Could it be? But if yes, this wasn’t good news, no matter how eager it made me feel. It was bad enough I was attracted to her. This was already beyond messy.
“We could have fucked already,” she repeated, running her hands down my torso as her eyes grew hooded. “Come on. You said we don’t have much time left. Let’s do this.”
When her fingers went past my navel, I caught her wrists and wrapped my tentacles around her middle for good measure to stop her from pouncing on me. I wasn’t sure I’d be able to put a stop to it once she started, and I still needed to explain this better.
“No, Zoe. Stop. This isn’t about sex. This is literally about your survival. Vodnik sperm gives humans a temporary ability to breathe underwater. It’s not widely known. We actively hide this trait, and I can’t get into that now. But it’s real. I’m telling you the truth. Do you believe me?”
She shrugged, looking put out. Her expression was pouty, like that night when she got drunk on whiskey and spent the evening sitting on her hands and telling me she wanted the forbidden fruit but the fruit didn’t want her back. I still didn’t know what that was about.
“Yeah, I believe you. Can we start now?”
I huffed, so exasperated, I wanted to shake her.
“Zoe, for fuck’s sake. Listen to me carefully. If this works, there is a very real possibility you will survive. Are you with me? After we’re done, and you realize you’re breathing without your mask, we will swim out of this cavern and spend one more week together. So please, consider it carefully.”
She paled, drawing away. I let her. It finally seemed like she got it.
“So… You’re for real?” she asked, her hand flying up to her face. “This… This could work?”
I exhaled in relief. “Yes. It will work. And I didn’t say it right, so I apologize. You don’t really have to suck my cock. All you have to do is swallow my cum. ”
Her eyes flitted down to where my cock was warm but still soft in its slit. I knew she couldn’t see it, but she evidently knew exactly where it was in my body.
“We’re in water,” she said slowly. “If I’m supposed to swallow, I have to take it in my mouth. But I get what you’re saying.”
I nodded. “I will get myself there. It will be awkward, but at least you’ll survive.”
“I kind of want to die, though,” she said flatly.
Fuck. That hurt. Just moments before, she seemingly couldn’t keep her hands off me, and now, she said she preferred to die rather than swallow my cum?
“I’m sorry,” I said, my jaw clenching. I’d expected this. I braced for it. And yet, that still didn’t prepare me for how painful it was.
“And that’s because I made it so fucking obvious how horny I am for you,” she said, staring at me with annoyance. “While you’re being all heroic and noble, and only helping me out of duty. You think it will be awkward once I take your jizz down my throat? Honey, it’s already beyond awkward. Just let me die here.”
Oh.
My shoulders slumped with a bright sort of relief. It was heady, and it loosened my tongue enough to tell her the truth even though I knew better than to muddle things further.
“After we set out from the safehouse, I was hard almost the entire way because you felt too good pressed up against me. I’m doing it because I want to save you, yes, but I will also enjoy it. I promise you, I’m not being noble. There. Now we’re even. You don’t have to be embarrassed anymore.”
She stared at me for a moment, then exhaled softly. She nodded.
“Thank you for that. For the record, now I definitely want to stay alive so we can explore this later.”
I winced. Yeah, telling her was a bad idea, because I already knew refusing her would be difficult after this. And I would have to refuse. Keeping her alive was my job, so it was okay to be intimate in our current circumstances. But starting a full-on sexual relationship was still out of the question.
Thankfully, Zoe didn’t seem to expect an answer. She smiled and pressed her fingers to the piece of her mask covering her mouth.
It was such an innocent gesture, yet it felt so filthy.
I held my breath, my cock filling rapidly. Damn. No matter how hard I tried to convince myself this was purely professional, it didn’t work. I’d never wanted a woman so much before, and now I knew she wanted me, too.
At least it would be quick. Embarrassingly so.
“I won’t be able to speak after I take off the mask,” Zoe said softly, watching me with glittering green eyes while I hummed to give us light. “Is there something you want to discuss beforehand? Any limits? Because honestly, I’d like to blow you. If that’s all right.”
A burst of pleasure rolled up from the base of my spine. I nodded helplessly, my throat constricting again.
“Yeah,” I said hoarsely. “Anything goes.”
I had a list of hard limits I always gave sex workers who serviced me. No touching above the waist. No kissing. No affectionate words or terms of endearment. No hugging. No smiling. No pretending this is more than it is.
But I had done all those things with Zoe, maybe apart from kissing, and it made no sense to list them. Besides, this wasn’t the kind of sex I usually had. It was… I didn’t know.
All I knew was that I didn’t mind if she touched me however she wanted. This was the only chance I got to cross the line. After this, we’d have to go back to normal, so I was desperate to milk this moment to the fullest.
“All right,” she said before licking her lips. “As for me, I don’t really deepthroat, but I can deal with a bit of choking. So if you want to fuck my throat, a couple deep thrusts will be fine, but more than that is not. And… will you hum or speak? I’d like to see. ”
I stared at her, suddenly heating with jealousy for all those men who taught her how many thrusts down her throat she could take. With a deep, cooling breath, I forced myself to let that go. We weren’t a couple, and I had no right to feel any sort of possessiveness over her.
So I simply nodded, focusing on the present moment. It was just this once. Just once, I would have her, and I would follow my instincts and take what I needed, because it was my only chance.
She took off her mask, and even though there were lines where it had pressed into her skin, I thought she was the most beautiful sight I’d ever beheld.
As she approached me with a conspiratorial smile, words crowded on my tongue, half-formed and eager, yet not savvy enough to speak. I didn’t dare say them, anyway, and so they had to remain my secret.
My pretty human. Such a warm, gorgeous woman. My sweetest, lovely thing.
Yet such a filthy, dirty girl. I want to fill you up until you can’t think about those other men. Until you’re dripping and crying, because you can’t handle how good it is.
My sweetheart.