Chapter 4 - Cole
“Daddy, is Sofia gonna come over for dinner tonight?” Liam asks, bouncing around me.
I nod.
He tells me about what they did yesterday, how she showed him the best way to climb trees so he could beat up giants.
She taught him the names of the bugs in the garden.
There’s always a story waiting for me when I come in from work now.
Liam adores Sofia. The last three days of letting them spend time together – supervised, for both of their sakes apparently – helps with Liam’s limited energy and spurs him on.
He wants her over every night for dinner, wants to show her his room, and wants to share his favorite shows and animal magazines with her. Sofia is his new obsession, better than any plant or animal.
Liam wants her around every evening. Dinner together. Time on the couch. Showing her his room, his favorite shows, his animal magazines. Sofia has become his newest obsession—more interesting than any plant or animal he’s ever latched onto.
I wish I could say she has no effect on me.
I want to believe that as I rinse the dishes from lunch and breakfast, listening to the familiar sounds of the house. I want to tell myself the rhythm we’ve fallen into is an inconvenience. A complication, but it’s not. It’s ... easy. Comfortable.
During the day, I work outside, taking care of what needs doing and keeping an eye on Liam.
Sofia has her own routine—errands in town, quiet hours inside the guesthouse—unless she’s with him.
With her finger bandaged, she can’t do much in the kitchen, but she still hovers nearby.
Setting things out. Keeping Liam company. Talking while I cook.
I don’t know what else to do with her, honestly.
So I watch. The way she adapts without complaint. The way she stays present even when she can’t help the way she wants to. The way she fits into the space as if she’s always been here.
And I like the way she does things. How she includes Liam when he asks questions, welcomes him to talk about everything, always encourages him to say more. Liam loves it. I’m ... on the fence.
We eat and I keep reminding my son to eat since he gets distracted in his stories. Sofia looks at me with a conspiratorial expression, then turns to Liam. “It’s my turn to share facts. Did you know sharks have existed longer than the rings of Saturn?”
She keeps him entertained with her facts, tells him why she came to town – a plan to stay, actually and start a book store, tells him that her mother is from this town, that she came here to get more life than she could get back home.
Her eyes dart to me when she mentions that, then bites her bottom lip.
Once we finish dinner, I get up to clean, my normal go to and remind Liam to get through a shower and go to bed, telling him I’ll be up there later to check on him. He hugs Sofia before he goes and she stays seated, offering me coffee, then simply drying as I wash.
Her body is so close to mine, her hip brushing against mine every time she shifts her weight. Sofia’s braid grazes my upper arm, light and distracting, sending a shiver down my spine before I can stop it.
I glance down at her hand.
The bandage is wrapped around her index finger, clean and snug. My gaze drifts automatically to the finger beside it.
No ring.
I already know that. The file was clear. No engagement. No marriage. Nothing tying her down.
Still, seeing it for myself does something I don’t like to examine too closely.
She’s only twenty-two.
“So you’re planning to stay here?” I ask, keeping my voice neutral.
She blinks a few times, then turns her big eyes on me. “Yeah. That’s the plan. My father says I need at least six backups, that most small businesses fail, but I’m determined. I know that I’ll need a backup, so I’ve been in town, seeing what the job market is like.”
I blink in surprise as she continues, saying she’ll work as a farm hand and learn what she needs to know if her loan doesn’t come through.
She’s willing to work two or three jobs if necessary, whether that’s bussing tables, passing the test to become a garbage collector, or something else as long as she gets to open her book store.
I listen to her for a while. She might have been sheltered—she was sheltered, from what she’s told me—but that’s not the whole of her. She’s soft, the kind of person who offers a smile easily, who moves through the world gently.
And yet, she’s determined.
Determined. Smart. Resilient in a quiet way I don’t see often, not even in men who like to swear they’re tougher than everyone else.
She clears her throat, shifting slightly. “I’ve talked a lot about myself tonight.”
“I hear that’s normal,” I say.
She hesitates, then lowers her voice. “Liam… mentioned his mom.” A pause. “An accident?”
My back stiffens and I draw a slow breath. I rinse the last plate, hand it to her, then turn back to the sink as if the motion will keep me steady.
No wonder this routine has started to feel easy.
It’s familiar. Intimate. The kind of quiet domestic closeness I swore I wouldn’t let back into my life.
Lisa and I used to move like this around each other. Side by side. Sharing space without thinking. Until it all fell apart.
In our last real fight—the one that finally stripped everything down to the truth—we said things neither of us could take back. That we loved each other, but we were making each other miserable. That it would be better to let go and find peace, even if it wasn’t together.
I know she wouldn’t want me living alone in a house full of silence.
Still… this feels wrong.
Like I’m stepping into something that should have stayed buried with her.
Like wanting ease again is the same as betraying what we had.
“A car accident,” I finally whisper. “She asked me to go with her to visit her parents and I didn’t. I should have, but Liam had the flu and I didn’t want him to travel and spread it or be uncomfortable. She agreed. I missed three of her phone calls. I didn’t think…and then ...”
I exhale slowly and cross my arms over my chest. Sofia turns to face me. She doesn’t ask for more, doesn’t demand details, she just watches me.
“If I would have gone with her, maybe she wouldn’t have been so tired.
If I would have answered the phone, I could have gotten police to her sooner and she wouldn’t have died alone.
I couldn’t save the one person who needed me most. I couldn’t save the woman I was meant to protect above all others.
I wasn’t there. I didn’t listen,” I say softly.
Sofia touches her chest gently, then brushes her hand over mine when I grip the counter, pushing down my own anger, my self-hatred, my failing. The worst thing I ever did was ignoring a phone call. It wouldn’t have been that hard to answer even while I was in the shower. It would have been so easy.
“How long?” She asks gently.
“Five years,” I answer, gripping the counter tighter. I exhale. “I’ve gotten through it, but I worry about Liam. He asks about her sometimes. Asks why he doesn’t have a mom. Seeing his pain is the hardest part.”
It’s the most I’ve said on the matter, even though the therapy appointments I was ordered to go to.
I look at Sofia for a long time. She’s nothing like Lisa, but there’s a softness and openness in her.
She doesn’t really pity me. She understands, warm and gentle, genuine.
She takes my hand fully, rubbing me with her thumb in slow circles until my whole body relaxes into something that’s hot and demanding.
Her plush lips, her beautiful face, those damn gold flecks in her eyes, how she feels as she moves closer to me, warm and soft. So fucking gentle. She sucks her bottom lip gently, drawing my gaze down. I don’t know what she wants to say, what she will actually say, or any combination of the two.
It doesn’t matter. Four days of being together like this, another four of seeing her and wanting her, of wishing every touch went further. I’m a man of control, but right now I feel vulnerable, desperate, so aware of the tension tightening between us that I can’t help myself.
I pull her closer and lean down, brushing my nose along hers, hovering just close enough to her mouth to give her time to pull away—to say no. I’m not an animal.
But she presses flush against me instead, and I feel every delicate curve of her body, her free hand sliding up my arm like she’s already made her choice.
The timing is wrong, the place is wrong, but when I hear her little whimper, none of that matters.
She’s right. I kiss her hard, hungry, sucking her bottom lip, then slipping my tongue into her mouth.
I won’t fuck her, can’t do that to either of us right now, but I can show her how much I want to do just that.
I devour her moans, lick them off her tongue, and kiss her deeper.
I shift her back until she’s nearly arching over the kitchen counter, my hand sliding to the small of her back to press her flush against me.
Sofia moans and sucks my tongue when I lick along hers again. My dick hardens, then I grind against her lower belly. She lets out a gasp that gives me more access and I happily feast on her, welcome her, savor her, and enjoy her just like I’m meant to.