Chapter 4
4
Y ou can do this.
This is necessary. It won’t upset your routine.
So what if there are strangers who will be living in the house?
Rhodes needs this. Rhodes could be in danger. Nothing can happen to Rhodes.
“Hey, um, are you okay?”
Cate startled and stared at the cute guy sitting next to her. If it was possible to have kind eyes, then he had them. There was something sweet about him. Something that made her feel at ease.
Which was weird for Cate. Because she rarely felt at ease. Social situations were generally a nightmare for her. Trying to understand people’s thoughts and feelings was a challenge . . . it would make her life so much easier if people just said what they thought. Instead of hiding behind fake smiles and false compliments.
Over the years, she’d managed to pick up on some cues. However, she mostly relied on Rhodes and her assistant, Oliver, to guide her.
“Do you have all the information you need?” she asked in a tight voice.
She could feel herself starting to get stressed. Her chest was tightening.
She glanced at her watch. It was past dinnertime. Mrs. Sanders had cooked a large dinner that would only need reheating.
Should she invite everyone to eat?
Of course you should. Especially Tracey . . . wait, Ink.
He’d never liked his first name.
She’d always liked Ink and Duke. They’d always been kind to her and so had Ink’s parents.
Unlike her aunt and uncle.
“I need to heat up dinner. Would you like some?” Cate asked.
Brody’s stomach rumbled. “I would. But I have to go have dinner with my, uh, my boyfriend and girlfriend.”
“Boyfriend and girlfriend?”
Now he was blushing and looking nervous. Why was he nervous?
Oh, was he worried that she would judge him?
What did she say? What should she do to put him at ease?
“Would they like to come to dinner?” she asked.
His eyes widened. Shoot. Had she said the wrong thing? She reached for the hair tie around her wrist, snapping it against her skin to punish herself.
The pain cleared the frantic worry, helping her think better.
“Oh no. Thank you, though. But we have, um, plans.”
Weirdly, she wasn’t as relieved by his refusal as she’d thought she would be.
“Perhaps another time. Can I wash your T-shirt?”
Brody stared at her with wide eyes.
Damn it, Cate. You’re being weird. That was weird.
She reached for her hair tie again, but she couldn’t do that too often or Rhodes would notice.
Thankfully, she always wore long sleeves so she could hide it.
Cate hated keeping things from her brother, but Rhodes wouldn’t understand why she needed it. Not after what she’d done . . . he’d just worry.
“Sorry! Forget I said that. I just . . . I have a thing about stains. Really weird, I know.”
“Believe me, I know weird,” Brody told her firmly. “And that’s not weird at all.”
Oh.
That was actually a really nice thing to say.
“Do you think you can get the stain out? It’s my favorite T-shirt.” Brody frowned at the stain as though he hadn’t seen it before. “I’m not even sure how I got it. Maybe it’s barbeque sauce. Or blood.”
She sucked in a breath.
“Autumn, that’s my girl, she sliced her finger while trying to cut an orange when turbulence hit,” he said urgently. “I was trying to stem the blood before the F . . . before, uh, Fred, our boyfriend saw it. But the stain seems too big for that.”
“She was cutting oranges while flying? That doesn’t seem safe.”
“Turns out it wasn’t. She’s not going to sit comfortably tonight,” he muttered.
She gaped at him. “Pardon?”
Was he implying that Fred would . . . would spank Autumn?
“Oh, uh, it’s all consensual!” he said in a rush. “He’s not abusing her or anything.”
There was such clear panic displayed on his face that even she could pick it up.
“I’m sorry,” she said, unsure of what to say to comfort him. She figured an apology might help.
“Why are you apologizing?” Brody asked.
“Because you’re upset. You are upset, right?”
“Urgh, more like wishing I had some sort of social filter,” he muttered.
“Oh, I struggle with that too.” Maybe that’s why she felt so at ease with him.
“You did nothing wrong though. You don’t need to apologize.”
She blinked. She’d learned early on that it didn’t matter if she was in the wrong or not.
Cate always had to apologize.
“Cate, you okay?” Rhodes called out from the table.
She glanced over at him with a nod. She was fine. Just a bit . . . flummoxed. “I don’t have to apologize if something isn’t my fault.”
Rhodes stared at her for a long moment. “I’ve been trying to tell you that for years.”
He had?
“Next time say it louder.”
To her surprise, he grinned like she’d said something funny. But she couldn’t understand what.
“So your boyfriend spanks your girlfriend?” she asked Brody.
Brody gulped. “Um. Yep.”
“That’s interesting. I thought that only happened in books.” She’d never understood why her body reacted so much to those scenes. Reading was her one escape. Well . . . she could slip into Little headspace, too, but she didn’t allow herself to do that.
But reading . . . she could escape into another world. Be another person.
A person who wasn’t so different and difficult.
Someone who could function.
Who didn’t need to live with their brother because otherwise she’d become a total recluse who forgot to eat, or exercise, or pay her bills.
She loved reading romance, especially books with dominant men who spanked their women and were crazy, protective, and possessive.
Her favorite author was CJ Bennett.
Brody rubbed the back of his neck. “Nah, it happens plenty in real life too.”
She leaned forward. “Do you get spanked?”
Unfortunately, the room went quiet just as she said that.
Rhodes stood and came over. “Brody, I’m so sorry. Cate, honey, you can’t really ask questions like that.” He put his hand on her shoulder, but she still flinched.
Rhodes grimaced.
Shit.
She was making everything worse. She couldn’t ask questions like that. What was she thinking? She knew that. But Brody was easy to talk to.
And now, Rhodes had to come to help her. He was probably annoyed or embarrassed. Maybe both.
Cate couldn’t even look toward the table to see how everyone was reacting.
They were probably wondering why Rhodes put up with her. That was something she wondered about daily.
Cate withdrew into herself, pulling her mask on. “I apologize, Brody. I didn’t mean to be inappropriate.”
“Cate, it’s all right.” Rhodes crouched next to her and she took a deep breath.
She hated being like this. Such an idiot. And the worst thing was . . . sometimes she wasn’t sure when she’d been inappropriate. Rhodes had to tell her.
You’re nothing but a burden, Cate.
Clenching her hands into fists, she tried to stave off the panic attack. If she could flick her hair tie, then things would be better.
But Rhodes wouldn’t like that.
“I need to go to work.” Cate stood.
“I wasn’t offended,” Brody said, standing with her. “Really.”
Rhodes stared at him. “Um.”
“He’s really not,” Ink called out.
Cate risked looking over at them. Mr. Blue was smiling. Ink looked relaxed. And for some reason, Mr. Stone winked at her. Which was surprising, because he looked so stern. Unyielding.
He was an extremely large man. She wondered if it was natural, or he spent all of his free time in the gym.
Kevin stared at her with his mouth pinched together. That was nothing unusual, though.
“Please sit again, Cate,” Brody told her. “Everything is fine. I’m not offended, and you didn’t do anything wrong.”
How did he know she was thinking that she’d done something wrong?
She slowly sat, and Rhodes gave her shoulder a squeeze before returning to the table.
“I am very sorry for asking that. It was inappropriate, and I’ll endeavor not to do it in the future,” she said stiffly.
Brody waved his hand in the air. “Seriously. I meant what I said. Not offended. And the answer is yes.”
“The answer?”
To whether he got spanked, dummy.
“Oh.” Wow.
He was red but smiling. “I won’t say I enjoy it, exactly. But I like having a boyfriend who is my Dominant. I need it. Sometimes, I go into my own head and ignore everything around me. Like, you know, showering and eating, and changing into clean clothes.”
She did that sometimes. Did she need a Dom? Although she couldn’t imagine having someone tell her what to do.
Cate knew she could be quite stubborn.
“Do you really think you could get this stain out?” Brody asked.
“I think so.”
Suddenly, he whipped off his T-shirt and handed it to her. “Thanks.”
“What’s going on here?”
Cate startled at Kevin’s voice. He was staring down at them both in disbelief. “What are you doing?”
“Cate?” Rhodes glanced over at them.
“Uh, he has a stain.” She held up the T-shirt.
Idiot.
Be normal.
“So he just whipped his T-shirt off in front of you?” Kevin was giving Brody a look that she didn’t like.
“I asked him to,” she told him firmly. Most of the time, she stayed out of Kevin’s way. She knew that he was great for Rhodes’ career, which is why she never said anything to her brother . . . but Kevin could be a dick sometimes.
“There’s a spare T-shirt in my suitcase,” Mr. Stone said. “I’ll go get it out of the car.”
She watched as he stood and walked out. He was broad across the shoulders, and his biceps were so thick that she wasn’t even sure she’d be able to get both hands around them.
Cate never thought she’d be attracted to the rough and rugged type. A man with a beard had never been on her radar.
But perhaps it was time to start reading some mountain man romance.
She wondered what it would feel like to have Mr. Stone’s arms around her. A strange thought. She didn’t usually like to be touched by people that she didn’t know and trust.
Ethan Stone.
She liked that name. The same number of letters for his first and last name added a symmetry she appreciated.
He didn’t have the classical good looks of the other bodyguard, Seth Blue. Another symmetrically pleasing name.
However, Mr. Blue didn’t have the same appeal for some reason. He should. He was gorgeous with dark hair and bright blue eyes. Mr. Blue could have been a movie star like Rhodes.
Mr. Stone returned with a top he gave to a blushing Brody. He gave Cate a long look and her insides warmed. What was it about him? Maybe it was how steady he seemed. Calm.
“Sorry,” Brody whispered to her.
“Not your fault. It’s mine.”
“Nah, it’s definitely my fault.” He slipped the T-shirt on. “I took my top off.”
“I asked you to.”
“But it was my?—”
Someone cleared their throat and she glanced up into Mr. Stone’s face. He looked . . . amused?
Or maybe it was gas?
Babies smiled when they had gas, right? So yeah, it was likely that.
“Are you all right, Mr. Stone?” she asked. “Do you need an antacid?”
“Uh, no. Why would you think that? Also, call me Ethan.”
Okay. Not gas. Noted.
“No reason.” She jumped to her feet. “I have to go, um, deal with this. I promise your T-shirt is in good hands.”
“Thanks, Cate,” Brody said while staring at his laptop.
Once she was out of the room, she leaned against the wall. Her hands were shaking.
She was nervous about all of these strangers in her house.
Well, Rhodes’ house.
But he’d told her that it was her house as well.
Cate wished she was better at just going with the flow and accepting change. However, that wasn’t the case. Having a routine helped make her feel safe. It stopped her from panicking and hiding in her closet.
Which was where she wanted to go now.
Right after she dealt with this stain.