Chapter 5
My heart felt like it stopped the minute I walked into Mr. Cooper’s room and spotted Calil.
I didn’t expect Mr. Cooper to be that Mr. Cooper, and I sure didn’t expect to see Calil.
I knew he and his grandfather were close, but I also thought he would have been somewhere playing basketball.
Calil had always been good at playing, so I wasn’t surprised when I heard he played professionally.
I didn’t keep up with basketball or sports, but Roy and the boys did.
I did see him play a few times when they watched the game, but I would always leave the room.
I couldn’t believe the way my body reacted to him. It was hard being professional, especially with him looking and smelling so good. I tried not to look in his direction too much, but I felt him watching me.
Calil had grown up. He let his hair grow out and had locs past his shoulders. They were pulled back into a ponytail, but I could tell how long they were. His toasted almond skin was now covered in tattoos from what I could see. I wasn’t surprised by that either.
The minute I could leave the room, I hightailed it out of there. Being so close to Calil made me feel like the walls were closing in on me. I shouldn’t have felt any type of way about him because I was married with children. Granted, my husband and I weren’t on the best of terms, but still.
As soon as I made it back to my office, I called Kendyll.
“Do you need me to get the boys still?” she asked when she answered.
“Um, I can get them. That’s not why I called, though.” I sat down in my chair and kicked my shoes off. I needed a minute to get myself together.
“Why do you sound like something happened?”
I rubbed the inside of my wrist and sighed. I wasn’t sure when it started, but I rubbed my wrist whenever I felt nervous, anxious, or pretty much any other emotion.
“Nothing happened, per se. I saw someone, though.”
“Uh, okay. Are you going to tell me who?”
I closed my eyes and pictured Calil’s face and the way his dark eyes bore into mine. Calil’s eyes were always expressive, and they reminded me of a black cup of coffee. And goodness when he licked his lips… I opened my eyes before I let my thoughts go any further than they already had.
“Remember my ex, Calil, I told you about?”
“Calil. Calil.” She said his name twice as if she were trying to remember him. “Wait. Calil as in Calil Cooper? The basketball player?”
“That’s the one.”
Kendyll and I had a girls’ night a week after we met, and we talked about our past relationships.
Calil and I were together so long ago, but he was the first guy to break my heart.
I never told Roy about him because I didn’t feel as though it was necessary.
For some reason, I felt like it would cause an issue.
I wasn’t sure why I felt like that. I just did.
“Oh shit. How did that go? I know he looks good.”
“Girl. I hadn’t seen him in forever, and time did him well. He didn’t even say much to me, but he didn’t have to. It was all in the way he kept looking at me.”
“Where did you see him? And why didn’t y’all talk?”
“Here. He’s visiting someone, and I had to help them. Ken, I played it cool on the outside, but on the inside, my body was in flames. That man has aged very well. Television doesn’t do him any justice. Mm.” I closed my eyes and bit my bottom lip. I couldn’t get over how good Calil looked now.
I couldn’t tell her everything because of HIPAA, but she knew that and wouldn’t ask questions about that. The reason he was at the hospital wasn’t important, anyway.
“It sounds like you are interested.”
“No. No. I can’t be interested in him, but I won’t deny how he looks now. Maybe I need to start watching more games.”
It was a good thing Roy didn’t know because if I suddenly started taking an interest in the games, he might have thought something was up.
“Do you think you are going to see him again?”
“Yes. I may see him tomorrow if he’s still there. I’m not sure. It wasn’t like we said anything personal to each other. He just asked me a question or two about his relative’s situation, and that was it. I’m telling you, he mainly stared at me the whole time.”
I could still picture the way Calil’s eyes roamed my body multiple times.
I knew he had to have seen my ring, but he didn’t say anything.
I wondered if it was because we were in front of his grandfather or if he just wasn’t thinking about me like that.
He probably only stared at me the way he did because he couldn’t believe it was me or the amount of weight I had gained over the years.
Calil always had a plethora of women, and I was sure he had even more now since he was rich and handsome.
“Well, maybe y’all will at least get a chance to talk. Not for anything, just old friends catching up. I won’t encourage you to cheat on your husband, even though he’s a butthole right now.”
I giggled at her calling him a butthole. Kendyll liked Roy, but she was my friend, so she would always have my back. She would also call me out on my shit if needed.
“The thought of cheating on Roy hadn’t crossed my mind at all.”
It didn’t matter how good Calil looked. I wasn’t trying to step outside of my marriage. I loved my husband, and I figured we would have a conversation soon, and things would be back on track. We were just in a little rough patch at the moment.
I glanced down at the clock and slid my feet back into my shoes. I needed to go pick the boys up, and there was no need for me to still be in my office. I didn’t want anyone else to call me for a last-minute patient.
“I didn’t think so. I know you love that man’s dirty draws, but I also know how you felt about Calil.”
“Key word is felt . I don’t have those feelings anymore.”
I knew nothing about Calil now to have feelings toward him.
Being attracted to someone meant nothing as long as a person didn’t act on it.
I could admire a handsome man from a distance just as I was sure Roy had been attracted to other women over the years.
I didn’t think he ever did anything, but lately, I hadn’t been so sure.
“You don’t have to convince me, friend.”
“I’m not.”
“Mhm. Why did your voice get so high?”
I made sure my office door was locked before I walked down the hall toward the elevator.
“It didn’t. Anyway, let me go pick up these kids. I’ll talk to you later.”
Kendyll laughed before she made me assure her I would at least text her later in the day.
The elevator door opened, and I was relieved it wasn’t anyone in there. I didn’t feel like talking to anyone. I needed to get my thoughts together before I picked up my boys and went home to my husband. I didn’t need thoughts of Calil seeping into my mind.
When the boys and I got home, I cooked a quick dinner while they did their homework.
Roy hadn’t reached out all day, and I didn’t like the feeling I got from that.
I thought about being petty and not making enough food for him, but I decided not to be that way.
I made sure he had a plate of food in the microwave whenever he got home.
Once the boys were in bed, I sat in the living room watching television and sipping on some wine.
I wanted to call Roy and see when he would get home, but I didn’t.
Instead, I turned my phone off and focused on the movie.
At some point, thoughts of Calil filled my mind.
I wondered if I would see him again. If he were dating, or if he still was a ho.
“That ain’t your business, Sloan,” I said to no one. I had to remind myself that whatever Calil did wasn’t my business. I did hope that we could have a conversation the next time I saw him.
I waited for Roy to get home and damn near drank the entire bottle of wine.
I knew it was a bad idea, and I would feel like shit in the morning, but I was in my feelings.
Something was going on with Roy. I called his phone more than once, but the first time, it rang until it went to voicemail, then every time after that, it didn’t ring at all.
It was almost midnight by the time I went to bed because I couldn’t keep my eyes open, and my husband hadn’t come home.