Chapter 35
WHAT SHE NEEDED IN LIFE
“Hey,” Arden said at the end of the day, seeing Blaze in a hallway of the hospital.
Her nerves were stretched so thin in her body she thought most were going to snap.
Every sound. Every shadow. Every call of her name had her jumping and trying to compose herself.
“How was your day?” Blaze asked.
“Could have been better.”
She wasn’t so sure this plan to let people see they were in a relationship was that smart, but she was going to listen to him because she didn’t know what else she could do.
What other step she could take.
Looping her boss in on what happened to her daughter’s bike didn’t seem wise. It wasn’t a work issue now. It was more personal. It was taken too far and was too... scary.
Even Maddy’s suggestion didn’t bring her much comfort.
Not like when she saw Blaze just now walking toward her, his smile bright, his hand coming out to reach for hers.
He wasn’t putting on a show. She knew that.
He truly wanted to see her. He wanted her to know he was thinking of her and had her.
“I know. I’m sorry about that.”
“It’s not your fault.”
A dry laugh slipped out. “We can’t be so sure of that right now.”
She moved closer to him, twisting to look around at anyone who might be watching.
She didn’t know all the nurses who worked on the floor. None of the techs. Not even the aides.
This felt impossible to her, but they were starting with the nurses and the people who Blaze talked to the most.
His arm went around her shoulder while he pulled her close before releasing her. “I know you’re busy.”
“I’m good right now. Everyone has been seen and I’m waiting on results. I’m allowed a few breaks.”
He had a protein bar in his hand that he was opening.
“I know you can’t tell how late you’ll be tonight,” she said.
“I hope to get out on time. A lot of the other doctors do, so as long as there is no emergency when I’m leaving, I’ll see you around eight when Gracie is in bed anyway.”
She sighed. “I’m going to tell her tonight. I don’t want to say you’re staying the night. She won’t understand that, so it’s best if you come after she’s in bed. Maybe in a few days I’ll feel better about things.”
“I’m not going to,” he said.
“I know. We both have to work on this. We can’t continue on this way until we get answers not even knowing when they could happen. We still don’t know who is doing this or why.”
Which was harder for her to swallow.
“It’s not helping any. I’ve got a list of names I sent to Clay earlier. He’ll work his way down them, but that doesn’t mean he’ll find much with a name only.”
“Especially if it’s a common name.”
“That’s right.”
“No one seems to be watching us,” she murmured, her tone teasing but cautious all the same. She was trying damn hard not to let anyone know how uneasy she’d been all day.
“Nope,” Blaze said as easily as all of his interactions were with her. She was much more used to keeping things level. “Maddy’s at the desk. She’ll let me know if anyone’s paying too much attention.”
Arden smiled, somewhat forced, the other part just some happiness at being by his side. “She’s probably watching everyone but us. She’s good at her job.”
“She’s the best,” he said, his eyes flicking over the nurses’ station.
“Then let’s go say hi,” she said, already stepping forward, ready to put on a massive bravado. She’d spent the last few years fighting for her daughter and she was going to do it again, only this time in a different form.
“If you want,” he said. Though the way he followed her, his hand brushing against her lower back, said he’d go anywhere she asked. And that was exactly what she needed in life.
Not putting space between them that crashed into her thoughts last night.
Doing that proved nothing. It wouldn’t change what was happening regardless of their thoughts on the notes.
Steven passed them wiggling his eyebrows like a middle-schooler who’d just caught the popular kids flirting. She rolled her eyes, unable to stop the grin tugging at her mouth. Act natural. Normal like she’d been doing here.
“Hi, Arden,” Shelly called from behind the counter.
“Hey,” she said, keeping her voice casual, calm. She could feel Blaze’s warmth beside her. Not close enough to touch, but close enough to know he wanted to. And maybe she wanted him to also.
They reached Maddy, who barely looked up from her computer before smirking. “Coming to say goodnight to your man?” Not loud, but definitely not quiet either.
She leaned on the counter close enough so that it would seem she was sharing a private piece of information. “I am.” Then, softer, moving even closer so only Maddy could hear. “Thank you. For everything.”
Maddy’s expression softened. “My pleasure. You’ve got a good one here.”
She laughed, the sound lighter than she felt. She hoped to hell she was putting on a good enough show because she didn’t know how many times she could do this. “I think so.”
When she looked back at Blaze, he was still watching only her. That grin, that warmth in his eyes that reached deeper than she was ready for if she allowed her mind to drift there.
She saw it then, clear as the pulse fluttering in her chest. The protectiveness, yes. That was always there. But beneath it was something steadier. Something quieter.
If she dared to name it, she’d call it love.
Or maybe she was just seeing her own reflection because she was more than halfway there herself.
Blaze reached out, brushing his fingers against hers and that simple touch grounded her.
She didn’t pull away like she’d always done to others in the past, but she inched even closer. She didn’t try to reclaim the control she’d clung to her whole life.
She just let it happen. She let him happen.
For the first time in a long time, it didn’t feel like surrender. It felt like trust.
And that was the greatest thing she needed.
“No one seems to be paying much attention to us,” he said.
“Doesn’t seem it to me either.” Maybe his brothers were wrong. But then she had to remind herself that not everyone worked every day. Not everyone was watching what was going on right now either.
He bent down, his mouth close to her ear, his cheek brushing hers. Anyone looking on would think it was a confidential comment he was making, but those who knew they were in a relationship could assume he was giving her a kiss on the cheek.
Which he did just now before he said, “Call security to walk you out. Let me know how the talk with Gracie goes.”
She turned so that their eyes were locked—the tender caring look she’d always dreamed of having thrown her way was happening now. “I will.”
“I’ve got you,” he said, reaching for her hands.
Just for more show, she leaned up and gave him a kiss on the lips.
Why not shove it out there and see what happens.
She left the ER and called security. An officer came down in less than five minutes, walked her to her car, then waited while she pulled away.
Looks like my message was received loud and clear.
I’ve come this far, and after that little loving display in the ER, Blaze is clearly head over heels. Exactly what I thought!
Let’s see if he can figure it out. If he’s smart enough, strong enough, good enough to save her.
Now I watch. I watch for how far he’s willing to go.
Maybe he’ll be brilliant and quick and fierce enough to save her in time.
Maybe he’ll fail like last time and learn exactly what it costs to lose someone you love.
It’s time he felt the weight I’ve carried.
Time he understood the silence and guilt I’ve barely survived.
Time he learned what happens next.