35. Brady
Brady
Distantly, I become aware of a faint beeping. My mind is filled with dark smoke and black thoughts. I made her despise me. It was the only way.
She should despise me, the cruel husband she didn’t choose.
She married me to save her brother—he’s the only person in this world she’ll ever love.
It’d be best for her to go back to him. To return to who she was.
Cora Muloney, the fierce, independent woman more than capable of surviving on her own.
She’s safest without me.
Without me was the goal. If I’m not around, then she’s in less danger. And if I’m permanently not around, then all the better.
But I’m still here.
Knowing that, I flash through all the selfish things I still want from this life. Cora happy. My family safe. Cora at my side, our enemies defeated. Together.
The steady beeping grows louder, sharpening in my ears. A heart monitor. I take a deep, painful inhale, and the monitor’s beeping gets faster.
Shit. It’s mine.
The details of the warehouse fire come roaring back.
Someone next to me gasps. They’re holding my hand, and they squeeze it as the beeping speeds up. I open my eyes to the most beautiful, terrible sight in the world.
Cora’s sitting by my hospital bed. She shouldn’t be here, next to me.
Next to me isn’t safe. That’s what makes this so awful.
But she’s here, and she’s wearing that sexy red dress I gave her, the one she cut short.
It’s streaked with dirt and soot. There’s soot on her forehead too, but her cheeks are smeared clean, her eyes puffy. She’s been crying.
I know why she’s here.
And yet I can’t fathom why she’s here.
I own you.
I saw the hatred in her eyes when I told her that.
And yet she’s here.
When her gaze locks with mine, she gasps again. Her expression ignites with hope, and it nearly crushes me. She whispers my name as the door to my private room opens.
Da enters, followed by Mam, Liam, Finn, and a nurse in blue scrubs. I’m glad they’ve chosen to keep Kieran away. He doesn’t need to see me like this, in bed wearing a hospital gown, an oxygen tube across my face. For that matter, I don’t want Cora to see me like this either.
I know I look weak. But I’m far from it. Whatever combination of inhaler meds and oxygen they’ve given me, it’s worked its magic.
The nurse goes to the monitor, back to its regular beeping. She adjusts the oxygen meter on my finger and checks my vitals in silence. She must be on payroll.
“Can we…?” Mam asks her, gesturing to the monitor and tubes. The nurse double-checks my numbers. Then she nods and begins disconnecting me, starting with the tube across my nostrils. Yes, she’s definitely on payroll. While the others watch her, Cora looks only at me.
My wife doesn’t leave my side. She doesn’t give up her spot in deference to Mam or Da. We all wait for the nurse to wheel out my IV, then Liam closes the door behind her.
No one speaks. Finn crosses his arms, glaring at Cora. She couldn’t care less.
I push myself more upright in bed. This isn’t my first hospital stint. I’m not at my best, but with every moment of consciousness I’m feeling more like myself.
Mam’s hair is uncharacteristically frizzy as she goes to the other side of my bed to adjust my pillow. Cora doesn’t move or let go of my hand. The two women share a look, and Mam ends it with a nod of encouragement. Beside her, Da looks down at me, stoic as ever.
“You good?” he asks.
“Good,” I confirm, and he turns his attention to Cora.
“You saved my son.”
“I saved my husband,” she says. The woman’s as possessive as I am.
“Aye,” Da says. “And he’s an O’Sullivan.”
“That makes me an O’Sullivan too.”
I’m no longer attached to the monitor. But I can almost hear its beeping, faster and faster as my heart swells with everything I feel for this woman. I try to remind myself of who I am. Of what I’ve put her through.
I don’t deserve her trust or affection.
I have to remind myself who she is too. Clever and calculating with a penchant for violence and power. If she’s calling herself an O’Sullivan, it’s because it’s the right tactical move.
Da holds her gaze. Then he nods once.
To her credit, Cora does exactly what she’s supposed to. She bows her head in deference to Da. The gesture itself is a half second too short. But that’s Cora, always skirting the line.
Mam dismisses everyone, including herself. She’s first out the door, but Finn lingers behind. He doesn’t say anything, he just stares daggers at Cora while she stays by my side. He has no right to look at her like that.
“You got a fucking problem, Finn?” I ask.
“You lied,” he says to Cora. She seems wholly unconcerned by his contempt.
“I did,” she says. “I lied right to your face.”
Finn’s jaw falls open, and I almost laugh. I don’t know what Cora told him, but no one can lie the way she can. And no one else can detect her lies the way I can. My younger brother looks at me, incredulous as he points to my wife in accusation.
“She lied. She knew exactly where to find you, but she told me and Liam that she didn’t know where you were. She sent us off on some wild goose chase.”
“I don’t see the problem,” I say. Finn’s pissy attitude is the last thing I want to deal with right now.
“She lied to me! And Liam,” he adds.
Cora gives him a patronizing smile.
“But that’s not what you’re upset about, is it?” she asks. “You’re mad at yourself for falling for it.”
She’s brutal. Cold and unapologetic, so much like myself that pride stirs inside me. I’ll back her every word. Even against Finn, who’s spitting with rage.
“I’m mad at—”
“Shut up, Finn.” I am all out of patience for this. “And get the fuck out of my room.”
Finn grits his teeth at me, and Cora, which I ought to punch him for. She just blinks at him, disinterested. As if he’s not worth the effort of her acting smug. With a wordless snarl, he storms out of the room, slamming the door behind him.
“That’s Finn for you.” I’m not going to apologize for my idiot brother’s behavior.
Cora shouldn’t have lied to my brothers.
But she must’ve had a calculated reason.
If she sent them off on a goose chase, it’s because she wanted to come for me by herself.
I don’t like the pang that causes in my chest.
I fling off the blanket and push myself to my feet.
“What are you doing?” she asks in alarm.
“Going home.” I open the drawer of the bedside table. Right where expected, folded clothes are waiting for me. I untie the knot at the back of my neck, and the hospital gown falls to the floor. I kick it aside.
“You’re in no state to go home.” She moves toward me like she’s ready to push me back into bed. I turn to fully face her.
“Do I look weak to you?”
There’s something powerful about standing there in front of her, buck naked while she’s fully clothed. I am all muscle and cock. I have no need to conceal any part of myself.
And no. I do not look weak.
The way she’s struggling to maintain eye contact, Cora knows I look good. But she’s still shaking her head.
“Just because you’re strong doesn’t make you fireproof.”
“I had it under control,” I say. “Until you came along, everything was going according to plan.”
“And what was that plan, exactly? To be a complete asshole to me, some fucked-up idea of pushing me away, all so you can run off into danger and leave me at home just to worry about you?”
“You weren’t worried,” I scoff. She couldn’t have been worried about me. Not after the way I treated her.
“Excuse me?”
“You have to care about someone to worry about them.”
“How dare you,” she hisses.
“All you care about is the power that comes from being at my side.” It doesn’t matter how selfishly I want to keep her next to me. Next to me isn’t safe. “You don’t care about me.”
“Of course I care about you, Brady. I—”
“Enough. You already told me why you want to be my partner.” I fill the word with as much disgust as I can.
“I want to be your partner.” Her voice hitches, and there’s an unusual shine to her eyes. “I want you, not because of your last name, but because of who you are. We’re so much alike, can’t you see that? I am you.”
“You can’t lie your way out of this. Not with me.”
A fat tear rolls down her cheek. Then she’s sobbing. She’s not making any weeping noise, only gasping shaky breaths. But tears stream down her face as she glares up at me. The sight of her furious control makes it worse.
My heart twists. I made my brilliant, confident, ferocious wife cry. I want so badly to take her in my arms, to hold her and comfort her. But I have to keep her away.
“You’re right,” she chokes out. “I can’t lie to you. You can see me through me in a way that no one else can.” She steps toward me, still crying, but doing her best to hold my gaze. “You can tell when I’m lying, so tell me.”
I narrow my eyes, and she takes a daring step closer.
“I want to be at this hospital,” she says. Beneath the tears dripping from her chin, a small muscle in her neck twitches.
“Lie.”
“I want to be at this hospital right now.” There’s no telltale twitch this time. “Because I want to be wherever you are.”
My body goes cold, the shock of being stabbed with the truth. I say nothing.
“I want you for your money.” It’s her lips that twitch this time, the fraction of a flicker.
“Lie.”
“I want you for your power.” To any professional poker player, Cora’s face is a mask right now. But to me, it’s like I can see every tiny electrical impulse firing beneath her skin, twitching every miniscule muscle, shouting out the lie.
I keep my jaw clenched shut.
“I want you because I care about you,” she says, and the truth of it devastates me.
“Lie.”
Her hand lashes out toward my face.