Chapter 12 Falco
FALCO
Is she toying with me?
I follow like a shadow, keeping a respectable distance as Aerin and Frederick walk arm in arm through the garden.
I know little about the Irish other than the bloody discontent between our two families has been going on for years and only recently increased in severity.
Guido’s answer is to marry Aerin off to this guy?
I shouldn’t have an opinion. It’s none of my business and Aerin is not mine to lay claim to, but how can I resist when she looks so beautiful in that black dress?
If I didn’t know any better, I’d say she came out here alone with Frederick just to get at me.
Why hasn’t she told her father what I did in the shower? It’s like standing on the gallows waiting for the trapdoor to open the moment he finds out the truth and takes my life, but Aerin hasn’t said a word about it to him.
Her display in the tailor shop earlier today was like a display of power, as if she was trying to make a point I didn’t quite grasp because I was too distracted by how the soft fabric clung to her breasts when she breathed and how her body made the subtle glitter within the dress shimmer like she’d carved out a piece of the night sky for herself.
My teeth sink into my tongue while Aerin’s light laughter carries toward me through the air and she leans closer to Frederick.
Tension bleeds into the back of my neck. As I swallow, the collar of my shirt suddenly tightens and makes itself known with every pulse of my heart.
I’m powerless, and I hate it.
Aerin and Frederick walk down the paving stone path, under wooden arches covered in winding flowers, past lovingly tended flower beds and stone sculptures, and arrive at the gigantic ornamental stone fountain that sits in the middle of the garden.
Water pours through the beaks of perfectly carved birds at such a slow rate that it’s difficult to tell the water is even moving until Aerin holds out her hand and breaks one of the water streams.
“From Italy,” she says with a beautiful smile. “My father had it shipped here and it took over a month because of how carefully they had treat it. Even the slightest knock could ruin the delicate balance inside that makes the water flow like this.”
“How beautiful,” Frederick remarks, his attention on Aerin. “We don’t have stonework like this back in Ireland.”
“I bet you have something just as beautiful.” Aerin fucking lowers her lashes.
“Moors. Grassland and fields that stretch for miles and miles, if you know where to look. Natural waterfalls and spring water that traverse nature’s waterways.”
“How romantic.” Aerin’s smile widens as they lazily rotate around the fountain. “Do you spend a lot of time there?”
“A few months of the year. My sister lives there overseeing our operations.”
“Are you allowed to tell me that?”
Frederick shrugs. “If we are to be married, then it won’t be a secret.”
My heart skitters in my chest as Aerin leans into Frederick with a laugh, but as she leans close enough to kiss him her eyes slide past and lock into me.
It’s so sudden that I nearly miss my step and my throat runs dry. Once she starts, she doesn’t stop.
She begins with holding his hand, constantly touching his arm and shoulder and leaning so close that I keep thinking she’s about to kiss him but she never does.
Frederick seems to be under the same impression because his arm slides around her waist and holds her close.
That’s where my arm should be.
It’s where I want it to be.
Execution be damned.
Deep down, I should be happy that they’re getting along. Marriages like these are purely for business, with no personal or emotional considerations. If Frederick was any kind of monster, Aerin’s future would turn bleak in an instant, but so far he seems to be an alright guy.
Annoyingly.
But as decent as he seems and as polite as he acts, there’s one aspect that makes my blood boil the longer I observe them together.
He touches her where I can’t.
He holds her even as we pass the patrol guards and no one bats an eye.
He tucks her hair behind her ear and compliments her eyes, even as she stares at me with a subtle smirk on her lips.
She really is pushing me, as eager for something she can’t have as I am.
I have to be the one who resists for both our sakes, since I’m fairly certain Aerin’s interest is purely because she feels trapped in this life and wants to break rules.
Unfortunately, I’m close to letting her break those rules just to satisfy my own puppy love.
As Aerin and Frederick near the marble statue garden at the far end of the property, the countless touches and whispers and secret laughter between them gets the better of me.
Reason vanishes from my mind, and I stride forward just as Frederick’s hand lifts once again to cup Aerin’s face.
“Hey!” Frederick cries out in alarm as I catch his wrist an inch away from Aerin’s face.
“Falco!”
“Enough,” I snap, my voice so low and tight that it sounds strange even to my own ears. “Quit pawing at her like she’s a piece of meat. She’s the daughter of Guido Paramatti and she deserves your respect. Beyond that—”
“Falco!” Aerin cries out again, but I simply raise my voice to talk over her complaint.
“She is your future bride, but that does not give you the right to touch Guido’s daughter like this while you’re on his own property.”
Frederick’s eyes widen. “I wasn’t trying to—”
“What?” I snap. “Think you can get what you want without having to commit to the agreement? Throw the agreement between our don and your captain into jeopardy?”
“No, sir!” Frederick glances at Aerin in a panic. “I wasn’t trying to do anything, I swear. I meant no disrespect.”
“You’re fine,” Aerin tries to say, but I raise my voice further.
“Get out of here before I report you for being handsy with the Paramatti heir before you’ve even put a ring on her finger.
There are rules here, rules you must respect even though you’re Irish, because one wrong move and this deal crumbles because your childish, arrogant, and unable to keep your hands to yourself behavior may very well insult our don. ”
Frederick looks between the two of us, his eyes wide like saucers, then he rips his wrist out of my grip and sprints away back up the path.
He melts into the darkness within seconds and a soft, annoyed laugh rumbles in my chest.
“That’s the Irish heir? Pathetic.”
“What the hell are you playing at?” Aerin snaps, shoving me with both her hands. “I was having a lovely time!”
“Sure you were.” Our eyes meet and heat throbs through my entire body. “I know what you were trying to do.”
“Oh really?” A challenge sparks in her eyes, and she glares at me. “I was getting to know my future husband.”
“Is that what you want to call it? Are you sure you weren’t trying to entice him into fucking you so you could break another rule and destroy everything your father is working for—”
Her palm collides hard with my face in a sharp slap. “How dare you accuse me of that?”
“I’m not wrong though, am I?” My cheek smarts from the slap, but there’s a curl of satisfaction deep down in my gut. Am I this far gone that I crave even the simplest of touches and will accept a slap of all things? “I’m here to protect you, Aerin. Which includes protecting you from yourself.”
“There was nothing to protect me from! Look at him. Frederick is a charming, perfectly sweet man, and I’m going to be spending the rest of my life with him so you better get used to him!
” Her voice wobbles slightly, and her breath catches in her throat.
“After all, it’s not like I have any other prospects. ”
My teeth clench together. “We all have duty, Aerin.” Callous words drilled into me the moment I started working here.
“Oh, what would you know?” She shoves at me again and walks past. “You have all the freedom you could want. You can go anywhere you want, do anything you want, and what do I get?” When she spins to face me, her curls fly in an arc and I’m instantly reminded of the restaurant.
“I can’t do anything. I can’t go anywhere.
I can’t see anyone. Privacy is a joke, so forgive me if the thought of my future husband fucking me over that statue over there is the highlight of my fucking day! ”
Her tirade ends in a gasp as jealousy surges through me like the rampant rush of a fever.
My hands land on her shoulder and I shove her up against the nearest marble statue, a woman curving forward with a jug in her hands.
The slope of her arms and the jug hides us briefly from view of the dinner party.
“Stop,” I growl, my voice a low rumble in my chest.
“Why?” Aerin demands breathlessly. “Why should I want those things, huh? It’s not like there’s anyone else interested, is there?”
“All you care about is breaking the rules. I’m not a fool.”
“Are you sure about that?” Her eyes dart rapidly back and forth between mine. “You’re jealous, aren’t you?”
“I’m doing my job.”
“Where in the job description does it state that you’re allowed to touch me?” she hisses. “Where does it tell you that you can watch me shower and help me finger myself when I’m too drunk to do it?”
My blood begins to boil and my grip on her soft, bare shoulders tightens. “Aerin,” I warn.
“What?” Her chin juts forward. “What are you going to do, huh? Nothing, because you’re the coward here. You’re the weak one, not Frederick. You’re the one who can’t take what he wants because you’re scared.”
“You’re mistaken.” It takes all my strength to keep my voice level.
Aerin cranes her head forward and our noses brush together. “Am I? That’s why you’re mad, isn’t it? You’re not pissed that my actions with Frederick could bring shame to my father or ruin his deal with the Irish. You’re pissed because he’s doing what you’re too chicken to do.”
She’s right.
She’s so right it’s painful. Aerin sees through everything, right down to the depths of my soul no matter how I try to hide it. Letting my jealousy get the better of me was the last nail in the coffin.
“We can’t,” I growl, my voice growing strained.
Something clicks behind her eyes, as if my words have finally confirmed something for her and she cups the side of my face with her warm hands. “We can.”
I can’t speak. Loyalty and duty collide with the lust fogging my thoughts.
She’s right here. I could kiss her here, lay her down on the stone and fuck her until she breaks, until she’s ruined for everyone except me. It would be my last deed on this earth, and it would be the best moment of my entire, shitty life.
But a long life watching from the sidelines is better than a quick fuck and death.
No one else will be able to keep her safe like I can.
No one else deserves to watch her like I do.
“Kiss me,” Aerin gasps. “Let go and kiss me.”
“I won’t.” There’s another factor to this risk, one I can’t ignore. Aerin’s desire is just a crush, that’s all. I’m an untouchable delight to her. Once that interest passes, I’m expendable.
My love for her is worth more than that.
“We’re going back to the house,” I snap, finally pulling away from her. Separated from her, the air around me suddenly clears and I can breathe again as sweat prickles down my back and sticks to my shirt.
“Fine. You’re fucking pathetic.” She turns away, visibly furious, and stalks back down the path with me in tow.
Thankfully, she doesn’t look back, because if she did, she’d see that those moments with her pressed up against the statue, trapped by my body and begging me to kiss her, have left my cock so hard it hurts.