Chapter Twenty-Five
Lina
Somewhere within this vast web of chambers and halls and passageways, Menon stirred.
Lina choked down a gulp of tea, praying it would settle her stomach.
She was often all too aware of Kai’s location within the shrine, a sensation sitting confusingly between pain and comfort, like digging a thumb into a bruise.
He was on one of the higher levels now, she surmised, gazing up at the recently-painted ceiling, at the old cracks peeking through like ripples on a pond.
She closed her eyes. Heard nothing but the wind clattering against the windowpanes, felt nothing but her own heartbeat.
And beneath it, the faint drum of Sowelan’s.
Cool fingertips grazed her hand, the space where her missing fingers used to be. “Are you all right?”
Lina startled, air rushing into her lungs.
She blinked the stars from her eyes, counted everything that was real: she was in the small corner room she shared with Ione, sparsely-furnished, wallpaper already peeling.
Ione sat beside her at the rough-hewn table, a guardian, an anchor tethering Lina securely in place.
On her other side, Cynthia, her teacup poised midway to her mouth like she wasn’t sure if it was polite to drink during a potential god-related meltdown.
Finally, Ami, standing and leaning on her hands over the table. “Is it Sowelan?” she demanded, eyes sparkling.
“It was,” Lina said, setting her teacup down before she dropped it. Again. “But He’s gone now.”
Ami slumped back into her seat. Lina wished she found her divine parasite half as exciting as Ami did.
Although stilted at first, conversation picked up again, the muted myah-myah-myah of talking making her blood simmer.
Cynthia talked about her grandfather, a gardener, about following him around Saros’s lunarium as a child and playing with frogs in the fountain.
Ami rejoined with tales about her own childhood down south, catching frogs with her sisters to fry up and eat.
“It’s a delicacy!” Ami cried when Cynthia pressed a hand over her heart in horror. “Don’t look like that!”
“I’m more surprised you took my lovely story and followed it with, ‘Oh, we ate the little bastards,’” Cynthia retorted, biting back a grudging smile.
“They are little bastards, and they are delicious,” Ami said loftily. “And forgive me for wanting to discuss food. Breakfast this morning was one egg.”
Ione watched them chatter, although she kept her hand over Lina’s, her pulse against Lina’s skin a steady tap-tap-tap. Lina focused on it, on her, the brightness of a shooting star. Her heliade, her friend, her lover.
Something shifted in the air, a crackle of energy no one else seemed to notice. Lina squeezed her eyes shut at the rumbling in her bones. Breathed.
Down, Sowelan, she willed. She imagined Sowelan to be a cobra rising, spreading its hood; perhaps a spider, creeping out from a dark corner. This is my body, Sowelan. Mine.
This is my body, her own words echoed back at her. A voice similar to hers, but different. Other. Ancient and cunning and ruthless.
Mine.
Lightning skittered down her spine. “Ione,” Lina whispered, eyes still shut, her limbs tensing. “You said… you saw Kai this morning?”
The others quieted. Ione shifted in her seat, facing her fully; the heavy comfort of her hand on Lina’s shoulder made her shiver. “What’s wrong?”
“Was he…” She didn’t even know what she was asking. “How was he?”
Bound by iron rain.
Stop, Sowelan.
My light, my light, my light –
Fingers touched her forehead, and then something else, cold and slick. A bubble of ice. Ione knelt in her chair over her, the ice poised in one hand against Lina’s forehead.
“You’re very hot,” Ione murmured as Cynthia filled a cup with water and slid it towards Lina.
“I think Mikau has yarrow,” Ami said, standing. “That should bring a fever down.”
Weakly Lina waved them all back, feeling her head tip. “Will it get rid of a god?”
“Maybe if we double the dose,” Ami returned, and Lina managed a dim smile.
She felt better. She was better.
Ione sat back and let the ice evaporate, although her gaze was intense, monitoring. “Kai was well enough,” she said, moving on for Lina’s sake. “Angry at Saros, but… well. Happy for us. Proud.”
See?, Lina thought – at who, she didn’t know. At herself, perhaps. Kai was fine. Probably, like her, suffering another migraine, a divine tantrum.
She was safe. They all were. Lina dug her nails into her palms beneath the table, mentally repeating it until it felt true. She was having tea with her loved ones, spending an autumn afternoon together. She was not a pathetic shell housing a god. She was Lina, she was safe, she was alive.
You are a fool.
“Shh.” Lina swayed in her seat, rocking a baby.
You are not listening.
Sowelan knock-knock-knocked against her skull. Not Sowelan, not her skull – the door. Cynthia’s chair skidded against the floorboards as she stood to answer.
Mikau burst in, dressed in a fine indigo uniform, a healer’s satchel of clinking phials and scrolls slung over their shoulder. They halted halfway between the threshold and the table, their face grey; beyond, in the hall, the sounds of hurried footsteps and muted commands made Lina feel cold.
“Cynthia, there you are,” Mikau said, although their eyes were trained on Ami, who slowly rose to her feet. They swallowed and flicked their gaze back to Cynthia. “Come with me.”
Cynthia did not budge, even when Ione rushed to her, unsubtly placing herself between them. “What’s going on?”
“Not to… cause a panic,” Mikau began, twitching a little at the dull roar outside, “but Sowelan’s devotees are marching up the mountain early. And we’re meeting them. Now.” They let out a quick, controlled breath. “Cynthia, as one of Menon’s seleneschals, you’re expected to stand beside Kai.”
The air pulled from Lina’s lungs. She heard a surprised noise, Ami, her hand fluttering over her mouth.
Not next week, not as agreed.
Now.
Cynthia quieted, her face ashen as she looked to Ione, like she could contradict this, stop this.
Ami hurried around to Mikau, steps faltering, nearly crashing into them.
No one spoke for a heavy moment, all of them doubtless seeing the same thing Lina was, memories of fire and blood, their lives gone up in flames.
They knew this was coming. But facing it now, days earlier than expected, was like a punch to the stomach. A cruel reminder that Kai and River, Cynthia and Mikau, they would all descend the mountain to meet Rigel.
And perhaps none of them would return.
“River is getting ready now.” Mikau cleared their throat. “We’re meeting him, Kai and Archpriest Saros in five.”
Ami clasped their hands. “I’m coming, too.”
“Absolutely not.” Mikau took her face and sent her a hard stare.
“You’re to stay put. Here, where it’s safe.
” They forced out a smile, an unwilling leader in the absence of Kai and River.
“Cynthia and I are to show our faces and present a unified front. Menon Incarnate and his shoal of loyal underlings. We will be more than fine, especially if Kai can work out his differences with Menon, but there may still be trouble and I want you well out of the way of it.”
Ami wilted, let Mikau draw her into their arms.
Their attention locked onto Ione. “You’re to stay here as well, Lady Ione.”
She scoffed. “Oh, I’m at no risk of walking into this. But – ” She ushered Cynthia and Ami with her back to Lina, alone at the table. “ – we’ll keep Cynthia. Lina, Ami and I will need protection, you understand.”
The noises outside ran together, shuffling bodies and stomping feet. Mikau heaved an impatient sigh. “You’ll be fighting Saros, then. He wants Kai to have an entourage.”
“Oh.” Ione pivoted, shoulders squared, and issued Mikau a withering glare. “I am more than happy to fight Saros, Mikau.”
“Ione – ”
“Ione.” Cynthia, her voice soft. Although still sheet-white, Cynthia disentangled herself from Ione’s grasp and, miraculously, squeezed her hands. “I am still a seleneschal.”
Cynthia strode, fists clenched, to stand beside Mikau, and Ione hugged her arms and whirled to face Lina, helpless.
My heliade, a small voice whispered. Lina wasn’t sure anymore whose it was. I will protect you. She slipped away from the table, casting for Ione, pulling her close.
Ione peered up at her, her eyes dancing.
Frustrated, she dug her palms into her closed eyelids.
“I…” She glanced at Ami, barely holding back tears, and with a purifying breath hauled Ami with her to Lina’s side.
“We’re – we’re all being very dramatic,” she said hotly, summoning a smile for Cynthia.
Rising where Ami fell. “You’ll be back in time for dinner. Perhaps we’ll even get two eggs.”
Ami sniffled and said something that sounded like Fried frogs.
Mikau smiled at her. At all of them. “Well,” they said. “Until we return.”
“Until we return,” Cynthia echoed, her voice barely audible over the commotion outside.
“Yes, yes,” Ione said, a queen again, although she still leaned into Lina, still clutched Ami to the both of them. “We’ll see you in a few hours, after Kai has frightened them with rain or a big wave and everyone has generously decided to leave one another alone.”
The click of the door snuffed out the clamour outside, leaving Lina, Ione and Ami alone in the airless quiet. Ione pressed harder into Lina’s arms, but Ami stepped away from them, wiped her eyes, shook out her limbs.
“Sorry,” she murmured, playing with her hands. “I know they’ll be…” She blew out a breath and straightened. “My mam and sisters are down the hall.” Ami pointed, her eyes still limned with tears. “D’you mind if I…?”
Of course, someone said. Go, go. There were hugs, goodbyes, see-you-laters. Lina felt herself smiling; saw herself lock the door, reach for Ione’s hand.
And deep in her gut, Sowelan raised His head.