Chapter 19 Rowan
ROWAN
Ican barely think straight as I stumble across the yard, past the sunflowers, and out onto the empty street. The night is heavy and thick with humidity. The insect song is deafening.
But I swear I can still hear Abi’s heartbeat inside the house, soft and steady and safe.
I climb the cemetery gate and slump down on the other side, sucking in deep breaths of air.
My cock is so hard it’s painful, and I adjust it listlessly over my pants, half-expecting to come from the friction.
I nearly came earlier when I got my first taste of Abi’s pleasure.
Her orgasm coated my face with slick, salty-sweet arousal, and I can still taste it. Still smell it.
I groan softly, slumping against the fence, absentmindedly rubbing my cock over my pants. I’ve jerked off in this cemetery plenty of times in the last few years. But it’s different tonight.
Tonight, Abi got to come, too.
I push myself up and lurch toward the trees, holding the memory of Abi’s long, shuddery orgasm in my head. The way she begged me for release, screaming that she would die without my tongue, calling me Nameless like it’s a secret between us—
I groan and lean up against a big marble slab, the memory hot and throbbing. I need my own release. That way, I can get back to making my rounds around Abi’s house. No one’s out here that I can sense, but I don’t like the idea of leaving her alone. Not one damn bit.
I fumble with my buttons and zipper. But before I can grab my cock and finish myself off, I feel her.
Abi.
I whip my gaze around and there she is, standing on the light-flooded porch again. Only this time, she has a flashlight with her, the light bobbing as she floats down the steps.
For a moment, all I can do is freeze in place, watching as she cuts across her lawn. Then I shove my cock back into my pants, but I don’t run. I’m too enraptured by the sight of her coming this way.
“Hello?” she calls out, her voice thin and wavery. A little afraid. “Are you out here?”
I step forward, my heart thudding. I don’t understand what she’s doing. Why she’s coming after me like this. I go to her. That’s always how it’s been, ever since I first laid eyes on her ten years ago. The only time she came to me, sort of, was when she met me for coffee a few days ago.
But that wasn’t me. That was Rowan.
Abi curses softly, the word carried on the wind. She stops at the street and swings the flashlight around. It’s too small to catch me from that distance, and I’m not sure what to do. Because I don’t understand why she’s here or why she’s looking for me.
But god, I want to find out.
“Hello?” Abi calls out again. “Seriously, I—You just ran off, and...”
Her voice trails away. For a second, I think she’s going to give up and go back into the house.
But she doesn’t.
Instead, she crosses the street.
I wait for her, standing there with my aching, rock-hard cock and confusion tightening up in my chest. But I don’t want to run from Abi, and so I just keep watching her light dance around as she approaches the cemetery gate. She unlocks it, the keys jangling, and shoves it open with a creak.
Then the light swipes around, blurring like a comet. Abi’s steps are soft and rustling through the grass.
“What the hell am I doing?” she murmurs. Speaking to herself, I know, but even with the distance between us, I can hear her. “Fuck, I’m going to get myself killed.”
That sends a twist of pain through my heart. I can’t let it go.
“I told you I won’t let that happen,” I say, loud enough to announce myself.
Abi screams and drops the flashlight, plunging us into darkness. I can still see her, though, limned by the street lamps. And I can feel her: the spike of her heart rate, the soft tangle of her confusion.
“Fuck!” she says. “Where are you?” She fumbles around in the grass and then lifts the flashlight, sweeping it around again. When it lands on me, I swear I can feel it, all the warm molecules of its light.
“Hey,” I say stupidly.
Abi blinks at me. We stare at each other from across the cemetery, the markers jutting up like teeth.
“Why’d you run away?” Abi calls out, her voice soft. Almost shy, maybe.
I step toward her, walking into the sphere of the flashlight. When I’m close enough to her, Abi tilts it away from my face, which I’m grateful for. I prefer the dark.
“Well?” She says it the way a victim will, when they’re trying to be brave and talk back to me.
“I finished what I came to do,” I say carefully. “And I wanted to come back out here to pick up my rounds again.”
“Your rounds?” The word trembles. “What, like, you’re looking for someone to ki—”
“No,” I say sharply, right before I clear the rest of the space between us. Abi gasps softly and drops the flashlight to her side. She looks so pretty out here, drenched in moonlight.
“Turn it off,” I tell her. “The flashlight.”
“Why?”
“Because you’re prettier in the dark.”
She blinks, gives a shy, nervous titter. “Where you can’t see me, you mean?”
“I can see you fine.” I tilt her gaze up to meet mine, and for a moment, I swear I can feel her staring straight through my killing face to see me. The real me.
My cock is so hard it’s painful.
“You should go back inside,” I tell her. “It’s safer in there.”
“From who?” she counters.
I drop my hand. I don’t want to tell her about that strange presence I felt, or my theory that her attacker may not have been working alone. I don’t want her to worry needlessly, not when I can protect her. “I don’t know,” I finally say. “But if someone tries to hurt you again, I’ll be here.”
Abi sucks in her breath. Curls her hands up into fists.
“Why did you come find me?” I ask softly.
Abi hesitates. I can sense something like fear coming off her, although it’s not the fear she felt when she was attacked, nor is it the same fear I felt when she discovered me in the shadows.
She takes another breath. “I—” she starts, then glances away, off into the darkness.
The cemetery rustles around us, moving in the sea wind.
“I didn’t understand why you ran away. Why you—did what you did and then didn’t expect—”
Heat courses through me. My cock throbs.
“Didn’t expect anything in return,” she finishes in a rush.
“I got what I wanted,” I say carefully, although that’s not entirely true. Of course I would love to be inside her, to feel the tight clamping muscles of her cunt. But only if she wants it. Only if she gives it to me willingly.
Abi digs her toe into the graveyard dirt. She’s wearing flimsy sandals, her toenails painted black. I hadn’t noticed that earlier, the black toenails. I’d been too focused on other things.
“I just thought,” she says softly. “It wasn’t—wasn’t fair, you know? For you to—not get to receive—you just gave—”
It takes me a second to realize what she’s getting at. To realize what she’s offering.
“You want to do that?” I ask. “With me?”
Abi jerks her gaze up to me. Even in the dark, I can feel the blood rushing close to her skin, perfuming the air around us.
“I just thought it would be fair,” she whispers, the words strained.
Then, to my shock, she steps closer to me. Puts her hand on my chest.
“You saved my life,” she whispers. “Then you made me come harder than—” She laughs, shakes her head. “Then ever, if I’m being honest.”
Pride swells up in my chest. My cock strains against my pants.
“I just—I thought we could keep going.” She looks up at me, her eyes bright in the darkness.
I don’t want to fuck her. Not right now. I won’t last long, and I want to do it right. I want to relish every line of her body and all the silky expanse of her skin.
But Abi Snow is staring at me with a hot, dark hunger in her eyes.
“Kneel,” I breathe out.
And she does.
She doesn’t protest. She doesn’t fight. She just sinks into the damp grass, her eyes never leaving mine.
I drag down my zipper and ease out my cock, trying not to touch it too much because I’m afraid that if I do, I’ll come. Abi watches me the whole time, her breath tight and shuddery until she sees my cock. Then she gives a soft, murmuring gasp. I don’t know what to make of it.
And then it doesn’t natter, because she wraps her fingers around my base and pulls my cockhead into her mouth.
I groan at the wet heat of her tongue, hardly believing that this is happening, just like I could hardly believe it when I was buried between her legs, feasting on the cunt I’ve dreamed of so much.
But it is happening, and Abi makes a soft mmm noise in the back of her throat and pulls me deeper into her mouth.
I braid my hand through her hair, although I let her take the lead as she bobs up and down my length.
She’s not quite able to swallow all of me, but it doesn’t matter.
I still sink into her, groaning, dropping my head back to look at the stars.
“Perfect,” I growl. “You’re fucking perfect.”
That makes her moan again, and the reverberations send pleasurable jolts through my belly. My balls tighten, hot and hard against my body. I knew I wasn’t going to last long.
I wind Abi’s silky black hair around my gloved hands, tugging on it a little. She peers up at me over the rim of her glasses, my cock still buried in her perfect mouth, and I nearly topple over at how gorgeous she looks.
“I’m going to—” It’s hard to get the words out. Hard to remember how to speak, with her kneeling at my feet like that. “Going to c-come.”
I feel a flash of her surprise, and I guess I don’t blame her, even if it is a little embarrassing to finish so quickly.
“You tasted so good,” I add, tightening my grip on her hair. “Nearly came while I was eating you.”
Abi moans at that, louder, and I grunt at the way her voice wraps around my dick.
Then she bobs her head faster, urging me on.
It takes every ounce of my willpower not to thrust into her mouth, not to fuck her face as roughly as I want to fuck her cunt.
But I don’t want to scare her away. Not when she came out here and willingly kneeled for me—for me, not even Rowan Hanover.
“Just like that,” I gasp out as she braces her hands on my legs. All I can feel is the heat of her tongue and the heat of my own pleasure. I’m going to erupt soon. “Don’t fucking stop, little detective.”
And she doesn’t. The rhythm of her soft sucking mouth is like falling back into oblivion. I squeeze her hair in my fist. Squeeze my eyes shut. Imagine how she looked laid out on that dais, her pussy wet and pink and swollen, her face flushed from coming.
Ecstasy tears through me. My cum shoots out, straight into her mouth, and I feel the convulsions of her throat as she swallows it down.
Then it’s all too much sensation, and I pull away from her, my cock gleaming with her spit in the moonlight.
Abi falls back on her heels, looking stunned and beautiful with her glossy, swollen lips. For a moment, all we can do is stare at each other.
Then I can’t stand it anymore. I kneel down, my softening cock wet against my thigh, until I’m eye-level with her. She looks into my killing face, and I can feel all these disparate emotions crashing around inside her. I would do anything to calm them, but I don’t know how.
So I just cup her face. She jolts a little but doesn’t look away from me.
“I didn’t expect you to do that,” I murmur.
Her hand snakes up and lies over mine. She’s afraid. She’s been afraid. But she’s all turned on again. I can smell the sweetness of it, and part of me wants to devour her again, out here in the graveyard, until I’m hard again. Then we could just keep going back and forth until dawn.
But I don’t want to overwhelm her. I don’t want to frighten her away. So I peel my mask up and lean in and kiss her instead, sliding my tongue through her lips until I taste my cum on her tongue.
She kisses me back—shyly, with the faintest hint of hesitation. And I can already feel my cock rising again.
I jerk back. Abi watches me warily, and I wish, suddenly, that I wasn’t the way I am. That Rowan Hanover was a real person, not a disguise. She would be with him for real, I think.
Darkness floods through me. I run my thumb over her lips, and her eyes search my face like she’s trying to find my humanity.
I know she won’t.
“Thank you,” I say softly, and then I kiss her again, lingering this time. The truth is, I’m not Rowan Hanover. I’m not normal. I’m not sure how human I really am at all.
But I will protect her.
Abi breaks the kiss with a sigh. “Now what?” she asks.
I brush her hair away from her face, tucking it behind her ear. “Go back inside,” I tell her. “Go to bed. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
Abi gazes up at me, eyes glimmering.
“I promise.”