Chapter 36
Chapter Thirty-Six
“Sorry.” I stuff my hands in my pockets, my voice meek. “I didn’t mean to intrude. But I’ve been losing my mind this week, worried about you since you went dark after the meeting with the director and Lily.”
Will’s definitely sending the sort of energy that doesn’t equal dinner-invite vibes. Or any sort of invite. He folds his arms tight across his chest after he takes off his hat. He’s pale. He doesn’t say anything. His knuckles are white as he grips the throw blanket around his shoulders.
Tentatively, I take a seat on the other wooden bench at a right angle to Will’s bench, no matter how tempting the swing might be. I search his eyes, looking for the Will I know. And want. Instead, he looks hollow.
“I miss you so much. You have no idea. You’re very missable, by the way.
In case you didn’t know. Like you’ve made a space inside me where you belong.
Now you’re gone, and I’m totally lost. You can tell me to fuck off, if you want, for good,” I say tentatively.
“And I’ll fuck off if you want. But I have a few things to say first. If you’ll listen. ”
“Like what?” Will asks after a long moment. But I catch the curiosity in his eyes, no matter what sort of front he’s got going on right now.
“Like you’re incredible. Also, you’re a dick for disappearing.”
Will laughs, like the Will I was wanting to see. He nods. The one I miss so much it hurts all the way down to the core of me.
“Good, glad I have your attention.”
He gives me a stern look then, which is weirdly thrilling. I lean slightly closer to him.
“You’re trying to take the low road now,” he says.
“I never claimed the high road, babe. Listen up. I’ve been calling and texting you all week, and I was starting to think you were stolen too, right along with the exhibit.
Your efforts to ghost me have officially failed.
Because you’re way more to me than work.
Or a quick fling. I mean, we tried hating each other.
Ignoring each other. Even fucking each other.
All to get this out of our systems, and face it, it didn’t take.
It only made me want you more. And—well, I also found your sketches of us and our summer together. And—they’re perfect,” I blurt.
He flushes, holding my gaze.
“And the problem is you mean a lot to me. Like, a fucking lot. You’re all I think about. All I really want. More than a lost exhibit. Or an internship. Even ten internships.”
“Dylan—” he protests, shifting slightly on his bench in the shade.
“The problem is… well, the problem is I’ve fallen in love with you, Will,” I say softly.
He stares at me, wide-eyed.
I get up, crossing the lawn to kneel before him. I sit back on my heels, hands on my thighs. I couldn’t tear my gaze away even if I wanted to, which I definitely don’t want.
“No no, get up,” he protests, looking away, then back at me.
“Listen, I promise I’m not proposing, but—tell me right now you don’t feel this too, between us, and I’ll fucking go away and leave you alone forever.”
Will trembles, his gaze fixed on me like we’re the only two people left in the world.
Distantly, the leaves of the giant tree rustle with the breeze.
The freshly cut lawn tickles my nose. The afternoon’s not quite warm, even for late August, with the threat of a summer storm lurking on the horizon with the muggy afternoon.
He reaches out and traces my cheek with the lightest touch.
I stare him down, his eyes silvery in this light. “Will. I love you. And you’re just going to have to fucking deal with it.”
Will makes a sound between a laugh and a sob. He’s still white-knuckling the blanket with his other hand, and he blinks away tears. “Please.” He coughs. “Get up, you daft man. The grass is wet.”
I get up and slide in beside him, into the warm crook of his arm as he wraps the blanket around me.
And then, after searching my eyes, he kisses me like I’ve been craving so badly.
We’re caught up in each other, his hand on my jaw.
I kiss him reverently, to prove how much he means to me. How much I want him.
When we finally stop kissing, my lips burning with want for him, we lean our foreheads against each other.
“You didn’t have to do that, you know,” I murmur.
“I wanted to kiss you,” Will protests, shutting his eyes tight.
“Not that. I was really hoping you’d kiss me too.” I chuckle softly, sitting up, reaching out to massage his temples. His eyes remain closed as he leans into my fingers. Enough to tell me he’s still not feeling a hundred percent.
“Then?”
I swallow hard. “Resigning your position. Nobody only blamed you, Will. It was both of our faults at work. It was a mistake. An accident. We didn’t lose anything on purpose. And you didn’t need to take the fall.”
At last, he opens his eyes again to look at me, looking strained. “Dylan. Maybe that’s true. Maybe it’s not. I… I did it to protect you.”
“You what?”
“To protect you,” he repeats. “Because you know what you’re doing.
And they needed someone to blame. And it definitely shouldn’t be you.
You need the internship more than me, like you said from the very beginning.
You have the museum degree and experience.
I didn’t deserve the internship. And it’s got to be something I fucked up along the way. ”
“Hey.” I still hold his face between my hands. He looks weary now. “You deserve this chance as much as I do, okay? We make a great team together. Maybe I’m biased.”
“You are, unfortunately.” But Will smiles.
And I’m smiling too. “You daft man,” I tease.
He laughs and shivers, then blushes. “Also.”
“Also?”
“I must confess that, very selfishly…” he begins. “I… I want you to stay on at the museum, Dylan. If you can. Because… I’ve fallen in love with you too.”
I can’t believe what I’m hearing. I wasn’t prepared to hear him feeling the same way. I was counting on spilling my guts out and crying alone on the train the way back to London. Of course, I don’t know how to handle this.
“But why?” I protest, aghast. “Why would you fall in love with me? Doesn’t that seem rash?”
Will laughs, terribly amused, and it thrills me to make him smile so broadly. It’s obvious he’s incredible, but I’m not used to the idea of someone falling in love with me. I mean, I have some great qualities, but I don’t let anyone get close enough to find out for sure.
Except now. Except for Will.
“Because you’re so moreish I can’t stand it. Because you stand up for me. More than that, for what you believe. I’ve never met anyone quite like you before. Someone who makes me feel like this. Special.”
“You should try coming to Canada sometime,” I joke. “The country’s full of people like me. I mean, I may need to go back to the motherland, and you can take another Canadian—pick of the litter.”
“I don’t believe you.”
I shrug. “You’ll have to take my word for it, then.”
His expression softens as he gazes affectionately at me. “Dylan. I know what you’re doing with the jokes, alright?”
I’m about to make some other smart-ass response, but my teeth click shut instead. I gaze back at him, lean into his arms, and kiss him thoroughly again until he moans softly in his throat.
“I wish…” His fingers are in my hair.
“You wish?” I breathe, teasing.
“I wish we were in my flat so I could do all the things I want to do to you in my bed. Even if you have to go back to Canada. I want to take advantage of the time we have together. Selfishly.”
“Mm, I like the sound of that very much.” I lean into him again, beaming with the joy of being so close to him once more. “Your greed’s a win for me as well.”
“Will?”
“Yes?”
“I don’t know where we go from here. Or what happens next. But one thing I want you to know is… what I want to ask is… would you be my boyfriend? Like, officially?”
His expression is of pure joy. Because of me. Because I made him feel that. “On one condition.”
My heart literally does the skip-a-beat thing as the first raindrops start to patter down on us, despite the shelter of the giant oak.
“What’s that?” I dare ask.
“That you’re my boyfriend too. Officially.”
Naturally, I throw my arms around him and kiss him with great enthusiasm, till he laughs and moans and grips my shirt. His mouth burns.
“Okay…” I gasp, intoxicated by the taste of him, like everything summer. “Yes.”
“Yes,” he agrees softly, leaning into me. He’s warm in my arms. The raindrops dance on the leaves of the tree. The still surface of the pool is broken by the rain. Everything smells fresh and new out here.
“God, Will. I missed you so much.”
“I’m sorry I made you worry,” he murmurs back. “I had an epic migraine. I was out for three days.”
“Sounds awful.”
He grimaces. “It was bad. I was actually overnight in hospital because my mum was so worried about me not being able to even drink water. I wasn’t there for too long, but they wanted to make sure I didn’t get totally dehydrated.
” He shakes his head. “Then I saw the pile of messages from you, and I wasn’t ready to respond. ”
“Well, fuck. I’m sorry. I didn’t know.”
“It was a lot, this last week,” Will confesses. “The only thing that gave me peace was knowing you would be okay at the museum, and they would have to give you the permanent job.”
Then, I remember the morning. I swallow hard. “Um. About that.”
Will looks at me, the corners of his mouth turning down at the shift in my tone. “What?”
There’s no easy way to tell him.
“I, er, tried to resign too.”
His eyes widen. “Dylan. You’re not serious. You can’t.”
“Why not?” I bristle. “You started it. And I wasn’t going to let you be scapegoated for a mistake we both made.”
He rubs his face with his hands. “I can’t believe you did that…”
“I couldn’t live with myself if I didn’t,” I protest. “Because you’ve worked so hard on everything this summer together with me. I couldn’t have people thinking shit about you… because of the shit I started at the beginning of summer. I was such a jerk.”
“I was acting like a jerk all on my own,” Will confesses. “And I deserve for people to think poorly of me. But you? Everyone loves you. It’s easy to see why.” Then he frowns again. “Please tell me you didn’t quit the internship, Dylan.”
I shift, uncomfortable. “I really did try this morning. Instead, they sent me home for the day. And we agreed that we’d talk next week. I’m also expected at the opening tomorrow night.”
Will looks relieved. He nods, leaning back into the bench. “Thank God.”
“I don’t know why they would listen to you resign and not me,” I grumble. “I’m very convincing.”
His lips quirk into a smile. “Mm.”
“Mm,” I acknowledge, leaning into him again. We’re slowly starting to get wet out here. “Well, seeing as no one’s dying on their sword tonight, maybe we should find somewhere dry? And you must be cold.”
“A little,” he admits. “What I’d really like is to go home with you.”
My heart soars. Home. With Will. Heaven. “I want to go home with you too.”
He brushes his lips lingeringly against mine, a promise for later. “Let’s go back to London, then.”
“I think Gray said something about dinner?”
“They’ll understand if we leave.”
“Will. I can’t show up and steal you away from your family just like that.”
“Please do. In fact, I insist.” Will rests his chin on my shoulder. He’s irresistible. I’d take him to the moon if he asked right now.
I lean my head against his for a moment. “Let’s go inside.”
Will at last shifts to upright again, looking uncomfortable once more. “I’m, er, not wearing my leg.”
“I love you with or without leg options,” I tease him gently with a grin.
With a wry smile, he shakes his head. “It’s different. Seeing me without it. I’m not used to most anyone other than my family seeing me without wearing my prosthesis. Except for early days in rehab and so on. And, of course, you.”
“That’s right, I’ve seen everything,” I tease affectionately. “And I love what I’ve seen.”
I’m rewarded with his blush.
I stand up and pass over his crutches. He emerges from the shelter of the throw blanket, also getting up on his one leg and reaching for his crutches after he’s up. Now, I can see his jeans are pinned up on his other leg.
“With the migraine, everything felt off this week,” Will explains. He runs a hand through his hair, leaning on his crutches. “Phantom pain in my leg, and a little weight loss means the fit of my prosthesis isn’t quite right. Plus, I feel my balance is off with the migraine, so I’m on these.”
“Gorgeous, you don’t need to explain anything to me.”
And it’s true enough, he looks thinner, which probably means a few days of not eating. Which also definitely means dinner’s on the cards for tonight.
Will gazes at me, his expression soft. “Let’s go home, Dylan.”