Chapter 17 #2
“Liv, what the hell do you think we’re doing now?
We’re getting all that together. I mean, it would be hard for him not to be there, especially at night since it’s his house, girl.
You can’t keep hiding that man, Liv. You gotta let him out to play sometime.
And no, I’ve decided to stay two weeks since Troy has the vacation time available too. ” Byrdie waved me off as she chuckled.
See, Olive. Just tell her so she doesn’t expect to see him down there.
“We’re going over our schedules. Highland runs a very successful business that is in the biggest and busiest season of the year for him. Hell, I barely see the man. And okay, two weeks. I think I can make that work.” Another truth, just not the way she probably was thinking.
Byrdie squinted and pressed her lips together, giving me a quizzical look.
The sound of a car pulling in had me getting up to see Jo-Jo was back early from his day out.
Fuck.
“Oh, is that him? I’ma just ask him to kick it myself since you trying to keep him all to yourself and what not.” Byrdie’s movements were fast, rushing past me as everyone was getting out of the car, with Highland helping Neela.
“What? No, Byrdie, leave him alone,” I snapped as I chased after her, but of course, it was pointless as she called out to him.
“Hey, Highland! It’s good to see you. I feel like I haven’t seen you since that night at the fair. Far too long.”
In true Highland fashion, he was polite as he addressed Byrdie while the kids swarmed me, talking all at once about their day at the aquarium. My ear was to the conversation with Highland and Byrdie though.
“So, as you may have heard, we’re planning our family vacation down in The Keys.
Liv will be at your house, of course, while my family rents one close by.
We’re going over activities and I was telling Liv that y’all should double date with me and my husband Troy.
And maybe a family game night. And well, that one can happen in your house.
I heard it’s really nice and I just have to see it.
” I could feel Highland’s burning gaze on me, and like a scary person, I looked everywhere but at him.
This is why you should’ve just told Byrdie. Now you’re going to look like a fucking crazy person for continuing with this facade that you two are still together.
Highland smirked. “Hm…this is news to me. Just give me the dates and I’ll make sure my schedule is open.” Byrdie yelped and stuck her tongue out at me.
“Thank you because your woman was being difficult and trying not to include you, and I was like, aht aht we gotta do something only for the grownups.”
“Damn, that’s messed up, Olive. You were going to leave me out in my own house?” This was the first time he had called me Olive in weeks. I had been Liv since that fucked up day in my office. I looked up at him, his brown eyes staring at me, saying everything.
And now you’re lying and got caught doing it. You’re never going to get this man back.
“No, nothing is final,” I said. We stood there just staring at each other. I wanted to say so much but my mouth wouldn’t move and let my words out. I was sure this whole situation was awkward, especially since Highland or me actually greeted each other. No “hi, baby” or kisses.
It got quiet before Byrdie spoke.
“Hey kids, how about we go get some ice cream?” All the kids yelled in excitement as she led them into the house.
“I apologize about that. You can ignore Byrdie’s request. I’m going to tell her about us. But if the girls want to spend time with us while we’re down there, just let me know.” I rushed the words out.
He nodded. “When are you coming down?”
“Phew, I don’t know yet. I still have to find a house or book a room for Jo-Jo and me. We’re going over our schedules now. But probably in a week or so.”
Another nod. “How long are y’all staying?”
I squinted as I tilted my head to the side as if I truly had to think about the time off I was planning to take. I was buying time to be next to him. Even with the few inches between us, I could smell his scent and I wasn’t ready to leave it.
“Umm… I think two weeks. I’m trying to work it out since Byrdie extended her vacation, plus I wanted to do something special for Jo-Jo since Jasiel isn’t going to make it back for a while.”
“Wow, two weeks. Did you quit your job or something? That’s a long time to take off work when you’re the only employee.” I didn’t miss his sarcastic tone, making me scoff. He knew I hadn’t.
“No. But I can do that when I’m the boss.” Highland snorted.
“I’m the boss too but I guess things are different when you laying up with your clients.” I rolled my eyes hard but didn’t open my mouth to defend my career again. Highland was set on me seeing this from his point of view only.
But, so are you, Olive.
I groaned at my own thoughts working against me.
I tried to see it from Highland’s perspective but I never had an issue before with any of my clients being inappropriate and wished he could understand it wasn’t that deep for me beyond helping my clients work through their needs. I needed Highland to understand I only wanted him to hold me.
“Highland, it’s not fair for you to expect me to make such a major decision at the drop of a dime when you saw something you didn’t like once.
You gave me no chance to possibly figure something else out.
Leading me to believe you really didn’t want me anyway.
It’s not just me and you know that. Jo-Jo has daily needs that require my income.
This house and the bills alone should tell you that. ”
Highland stepped closer to me and, for the first time in weeks, touched me.
His strong hand cupped my face, and instantly, like butter spreading on toast, I melted into it.
And the ache that sat in my heart seemed to ease.
I breathed out in relief from having him back on my body, even if it was just a simple caress on my cheek.
“Olive, you mentioning Jo-Jo like I don’t know he’s a major factor.
But, baby, I would’ve handled everything for you two and you know that.
I’m a man who understands that my request was life changing, but I assumed that you trusted me to hold you down no matter what.
I’ve told you since our first date, I was working on our forever type of thing.
That included me taking care of you and Jo-Jo too. ”
“We can still have that.”
“Are you ready to dissolve your business?”
“Highland… I’m trying to see this from your eyes but no. I’m not ready. I can’t just abandon my clients like that. They need me,” I stressed, my tone coming out whiny.
“And I guess me needing you means shit.” Highland snatched his hand from my body and I immediately felt the pain in my chest again. He turned away from me without another look, leaving our space.
Fuck, Olive!
I had to stop him.
And say what?
Anything.
Before I could think of something worth saying, my mouth was open and calling out to him.
“Highland!” I hated that my voice cracked.
He stopped but didn’t turn to see me.
“I miss you,” I cried out as the tears began to well up in my eyes.
“Then handle the situation, Liv. Let me know what days you and Jo-Jo are coming down so I can have the house ready for y’all; no need for a rental. Tell the girls I’ll be back in a few.”
He got in his car again, leaving me standing there with tears staining my cheeks. But even through the ache in my chest, I felt hope.
There’s still a chance; he offered the house.
Upon walking into the house, Byrdie was in my face quick.
“Liv, you got some shit to tell me. So while these kids are busy, let’s go.” I was dragged back out to my deck.
I couldn’t hold it in anymore. I needed my best friend now more than ever. My heart was continually breaking and I forgot how to breathe.
“We broke up.” The words slipped out of my mouth the moment we retook our seats.
“Well I picked up on that much. But what happened? I thought things were good with you two.”
I reached for my glass and took a long drink before I dropped my head, trying to hide my shame because I was starting to realize I was to blame.
“A few weeks ago he popped up to surprise me at my office and saw me in action with a client. When I say it was bad, I mean level ten bad. He didn’t explode while my client was there but he hates my job and basically told me him or it.
I fucked up and didn’t react fast enough.
Well the way he wanted me to. I can’t just quit my job.
It’s my whole ass career. I don’t get it though.
It’s not like I’m cheating and fucking my clients. But Highland doesn’t see it that way.”
Byrdie released a sigh as she pressed her lips together, going for her glass. There was a pregnant pause as she took a drink before she spoke.
“You know I love you and I’ma always rock with you until the wheels fall off, but Liv, I get it.
Single life being a professional cuddler is cool in a sense, but even then, it’s different and top level dangerous.
In a relationship though? And before you jump on me, it’s not about being insecure, it’s about respecting that level of intimacy between you and your partner.
Hypothetically speaking, how would you feel if Highland was providing that level of comfort to another woman, like a friend, and you happened to see? How would you feel or react?”
Without hesitation I responded, “I would fuck both of their asses up.”
Byrdie smirked as she continued her line of questioning. “And would you expect Highland to stop being that close and intimate with her?”
“Hell yeah. Because whatever they had before me is done now. Ain’t no way I would let my man cuddle his friend like they were me.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I gasped while Byrdie just sat there with a smug grin on her face, sipping her drink. I got it.
Olive, you fucked up.
“There are other ways to help your clients without this level of intimacy, Liv, and you know it. Why are you acting as if you don’t have other options for work?
You could hire other cuddler therapists.
You could become a traditional therapist or do art therapy.
You have the degrees that make you able to do anything within the field and be fine.
So what’s the real issue here when it comes to compromising to be with the man who loves you and Jo-Jo? ”
Fear of the unknown.
I shrugged as I grabbed the pitcher and topped my drink off.
“Love is a big word to be using right now, ain’t it? Isn’t this all happening too fast between us? It’s been a few months and making drastic changes like career choices is a lot.”
Byrdie waved me off as she kissed her teeth.
“Umph… heffa, please. Love is the only word that fits with you two. I can see it when y’all look at each other, even with the hurt behind it.
And Liv, love moves differently for everyone.
Can’t nobody tell you it’s too soon or too slow.
And would it be a change if you hired help?
You could still be part of the process, just as a supervisor.
Which could work honestly. You keep your practice and all your contracts but you don’t cuddle anymore.
I’m just saying, do something before you really fuck up and lose your man for real. He ain’t gone yet.”
I have to do something.